Authors Note - Thanks for reading so far.

Chapter 19

Ben rested his hand on the hospital bed, he had just finished getting dressed and was waiting for Meg to come and collect him, he smiled sheepishly wondering if it was the new clothes that made him feel so vulnerable or the thought of going out into the world again.

Memories of his time in the basement came; he found it strange that he had tried so hard to get out of the basement to get to his friends yet now he felt safer in the hospital room, with the walls and nurses protecting him from surprises and the outside world.

He stiffened as he heard a movement at the doorway behind him, in his mind he could see her walking towards him, he wanted to turn and greet her but was suddenly afraid in case he was wrong so stayed still. He felt her hand on his arm then the jolt of their connection as their hands touched giving him the strength he needed. He turned round into her so he could feel more of her and drink in the smell of her scent, smiling so she could not see his fear. She looked up at him, her eyes showing her love and reassurance and when she spoke, her love and understanding sent a shiver down his spine.

"It's all right Ben." She had seen the flash of fear he tried so hard to hide and made sure her words were gentle then reached up kissing him lightly. She broke away still holding his hand, and picked up the small bag on the bed with the other and led him out of the room. He walked beside her quietly gaining strength from her confidence and the smiles and cheerful goodbyes from the nurses.

Casey waiting by the car at the front door of the hospital greeted them warmly accepting Ben's quietness. As they drove to Surf Central Ben let their chatter wash over him, everything seemed bigger, sharper more daunting. When they travelled to the Deep he had been wrapped up in his thoughts of Tim, Tess and the Captain and how strange things had turned out to be linked to the past.

Now it was different this was his world again, no-one would protect him if he fell, … he had to join it and make up for the past and face the future. He started to wonder how people would look at and accept him. Would they see him as Ben straight away, or would there be that slight hesitation he used to experience when he was growing up, and was always more noticeable after Derek had played his tricks on him and his friends. He never could work whether they felt guilt or embarrassment for him or themselves for getting caught out yet again... and of course he could never ask them….

He suddenly realised the car had stopped and Meg was holding the door open for him, she smiled and gently teased him when she realised he had not heard a word they had been saying. He smiled and followed them to the front steps of Surf Central, Meg gently pushed him to the front and Casey handed him the key. "That's your key Ben; this is your home for now."

It was a simple act giving him the first feeling of freedom as he unlocked and opened the door, realising he could come or go when ever he wanted - he did not have to wait for someone to set him free anymore. In his haze of mixed feelings, he found himself in the front room slowly looking round it as if for the first time. He smiled when he noticed a card saying 'Welcome to Ben's Corner' perched on a comfortable chair, next to his CD player, with some CDs and books on the shelf.

"Hi Ben!" Sara called from the kitchen and as she joined them, carrying on in a slightly cheeky tone as she got his attention. "We have a rota for washing up and cooking. Though in your case cooking can be from the Deep if you like ... Cups of tea for morning break will be ready in a moment... I know Meg is dying to show you the bedroom." She grinned impishly at her sister adding "Casey is due in for the afternoon shift and I'm going round to Sunset Sisters with him in a moment, we have some goods to unload must keep those muscles in trim! … So you will have the house to yourselves!"

Laughing Meg threatened to hit her sister then led the way up the stairs and into her room. Ben quietly followed her and sat on the bed looking around him appreciating the corner she had made for his laptop and other things from the house he had asked for. He felt the mattress move slightly as she sat beside him her hand rested gently on his knee her voice showed her concern as she spoke. "What's wrong? You're so quiet."

He took her hand in his and looked at her and then around the room. "It feels so strange; this is your home, your space. I know I love you with all my heart and I feel you love me... I don't feel as though I have anything... I'm scared to start again, what people think and act; and he will take it all again. I can not risk that..."

Meg gently put her hand on his then up his arm finally resting it against his cheek. She could feel his anxiety and loss of confidence; he had tried on his own to protect her as well as their love and in his eyes failed. She had to make him understand it was not his fault and that she wanted to be there for him.

She let her love show in her voice as she spoke. "We lost our trust because other people wanted it not because we wanted it. You were taken before we could find it again we would have if you had returned from Seattle. Now we know where we stand, we love each other. You don't have to protect me, let me help and protect you while we find it again. Casey and Sara will be around for both of us. I cannot begin to understand how you feel about Derek doing what he did but we don't blame you. You know where he is and will be. I want to be with you through your nightmares, as you put things back in place and start a fresh.

We love you, want you, your place is here by my side in our home Sunset Beach. No one is going to drive us away. Mum sends her love and Dad will, given time, he needs to understand and get to know you. You've always said you understood him and given him space in the past, it will be all right... I'm not going to leave you and run back to Mum and Dad, I did not understand how deeply I love you I'm beginning to now I want to carry on loving you."

All the time she spoke she kept her eyes on his face watching the confusion in his eyes start to clear. She kissed him gently at first then let the warmth of her love take over, she felt the strength of their connection as he gradually relaxed and responded. They broke apart, her laugh and smile was gentle and loving as she looked deep into his eyes and gently pushed him back so he was lying on the bed. "Casey and Sara have gone we're on our own. Time is no problem."

He made himself comfortable as he asked. "What about Tyus's orders?"

She giggled. "That's easy you're resting, we'll have some exercise then you can rest while I get the tea or lunch."

"How?" She saw the hint of smile and mischief in his eyes and knew the ice had been broken, he was her Ben again. Was tempted to tell him about the food in the fridge instead she leant down and whispered what she wanted in his ear then raised herself and started to unbutton his shirt.

He made a half hearted attempt to stop her as he replied "But I've just go used to them!" She grinned and exclaimed "Tough!" and pulled his shirt open, she stopped for a moment, then gently outlined his bruises, feeling the ripple of his muscles then gentle moved her fingers away, as she mouthed. "I'll be careful" She felt his hands tentatively brush over her body till they came to her blouse and the buttons. She let him undo them, then she slipped the blouse off, sweeping her hair out of her face and leaning down again to kiss him. Then she let her body gently rest on his chest, so he could undo her bra, and felt his gentle touch as she rolled onto her side so he could finish undressing her. She rolled back again and helped him undress, watching his face drinking in that familiar feeling she had missed so much.

With words, sighs and giggles they relaxed into their courtship, finally enjoying the feel of their bodies touching as they tumbled together arousing the love they had lost and suppressed for so long.

oxoxo

The shift over Casey walked along the arcade to meet Sara outside Sunset Sisters as agreed wondering if they should find some where else to eat out rather than go back to Surf Central and interrupt Ben and Meg on their first time together. He grinned at the thought of them together and the chance of having their friendship and becoming a foursome again. He heard a shop door shut and saw Sara closing up and watched her, she looked happy. "A good day then Sara."

She put the key in her pocket and smiled as she replied. "Yes everyone's been in to ask after Ben and bought something before leaving. I think I'll have to ask him to do it again in a few months time."

She giggled at Casey's reaction. "It's Ok I'll not say it even in fun. I just hope he will not have too many nightmares for Meg's sake. Shall we go and disturb the lovebirds."

Casey hugged and kissed her before he replied. "I was wondering about going out letting them have some time together."

Sara laughed "Sorry to disappoint you but Meg said tea was waiting which could be interesting if they've been in the kitchen together. I think it's good that Ben feels all right with people around him after all he's been on his own for a long time. It must seem a bit strange, remember how he was the last time Derek did it to him."

Casey nodded and they walked into Surf Central to find the table had been set for two with candles in the centre but not lit. Meg came in from the kitchen carrying a covered tray and smiling. "Your tea will be served when you are ready. We are eating up stairs and then I hope to get Ben out for a short walk he wants to avoid crowds at the moment otherwise everything is fine."

She looked at her sister and laughed "No! I will not give you chapter and verse. I thought we could go up to the small park it's usually quiet there in the evenings. Perhaps we will all chat later. He's feeling vulnerable around people, especially strangers.

Casey nodded and smiled. "That sounds a good idea. Take the phone so you can call if necessary. I know it was your night but you did not need to cook for us."

Meg laughed and admitted. "I did not we sent out to The Deep as you can imagine they were really chuffed. So get a move on!"

Sara came over saying "Go on upstairs to him we will get our own." and gave her a gentle push towards the stairs. Casey came beside Sara as they watched Meg go up the stairs. Sara said quietly "It's going to be all right isn't it?"

"Yes I hope so, now you sit down and I'll be the waiter."

Sara smiled went to the table and lit the candle and sat down.

oxoxo

Ben and Meg sat on the bench looking up at the stars she felt snug and warm tucked into his chest and his arm around her shoulders. They had fallen into an easy silence after talking about the past few days and how they felt. She felt a shiver run through him at the sound of sudden laughter and raised voices in the distance and then as it came closer he grew uneasy. Meg thought she heard some people coming from the other direction and checked. "It's all right its Sara and Casey I think we should go back; it's been good for your first day."

Ben nodded and said, "Thank you" and kissed her lightly. Sara called out as they arrived. "Hey we've come too soon!" Casey nudged Sara to be quiet and she laughed "We have got a good excuse though."

Meg and Ben broke a part and Meg looked at her sister questioningly so she carried on "The good Doctor Tyus rang to say Ben should have a story read to him by Aunty Meg and then take a pill and be tucked up for the night."

They laughed; Casey had his arm resting round Sara's shoulder and said quietly. "Umm... Will you do the same for me I mean read the story and tuck me up … after our walk of course?"

Sara pushed him hard so he had to step back to get his balance and he saw the group of noisy youngsters coming closer and Ben stiffen so said quickly trying to make it casual as possible.

"I think I need to take Sara in hand so we'll walk with you back home. Oh yes just in case you think you'll have peace and quiet tomorrow AJ wanted to run through a couple of things regarding Liberty Corp. so he's calling late morning..." as he carried on he made sure Ben and Meg were in front of them so Ben would feel protected.