The Diego Diaries: Golfin'and Goofin'(dd8 197)
I FINALLY GOT IT ON AND GOING! :D Damn, just getting the writing program to work took all day long.
=0=Ops Center a few later
"What can you tell us, Paragon?" Optimus Prime asked as he sat down at the command table to get an updated report.
"We have an unknown but substantial battle group leaving the empire through The Ruins. The appear to belong to the defensive line the Decepticons put in place at the edge of known space. The path forward is seldom used but for those who flee Decepticon contact at the frontier of the old empire. It was always considered a desperation move to take that path and I'd say it probably indicates that a fleet got high centered with command, then decided to run."
"What is the timetable for them to come within harms distance from us?" Prime asked.
"Not for a while. The pathway they're on isn't a straight line to us They have to reach close to our station on the Silk Road before there's a choice of directions to go elsewhere. I doubt they will given the station and the idea that this kind of wealth is possible," Paragon replied.
"I agree with that," Prowl said. "These usually are the worst possible individuals so nothing would surprise me."
"We need to set up a sensor presence that direction," Prime said. "I do not want to get caught flat footed over this. I want to get some clue of the identities of the crew and their commander. I also want a clearer picture of the makeup of the armada."
"We can send a deep space capable dish array to the station on the Silk Road. We need to warn those out there about this group because some of our customers live closer to the path where they're projected to cross," Prowl said as he opened a closer look at the area under concern on the data map before them. "They could leave here and go into this star group," he said pointing to a large star nursery nearby. "I'm not clear what's there but honestly, with the messages we've sent for soldiers and refugees, if they do I'll be enormously surprised."
"Me, too," Prime said grimly. "Let us figure out a strategy and get it underway. We have some time before we have to knuckle down so we need to get as much information as we can."
They'd work on it a while, then leave for the rest of the evening. At 2000 joors on the TMC, the 'Cybertronian' rules for golf would be released to the solar system by the manager of the Martian golf course, Pulsar and reported on The Hourly News by Jazz.
=0=At a club in Tyger Pax
They relaxed in their chairs as they sipped beer. Soon they'd pick up kids and go home for dinner but that didn't stop them from strategizing and bullshitting about the tournament that would happen the following orn.
"I figured it'd be watched by a lot of people given its being shown on Earth and around the empire but the scope is incredible," Flint said as he smirked at the twins. "Some of us aren't afraid of the game tomorrow because we managed to break par or near it."
"Frag you," Sunstreaker said. He grinned at the mech who was his partner in billiards tournaments. "Tomorrow is another orn."
"What was your score?" Flint asked as he grinned at Sideswipe.
"What was yours?" Sideswipe asked.
"82."
They both stared at him silently a moment, then muttered. "Frag …"
=0=Skip ahead that evening
The lights of the course were on as this was a twenty-four hour and a half/fourteen proposition, the course. The velvety darkness of the universe bore down upon them as they teed off. They would spend the entire night playing and perfecting their swings and putting in the hopes that they'd pull of an unpredicted upset. Or, at best, not look like total jerks.
Blackjack was determined his son wouldn't get the awards that Ratchet had been asked to design including The Goat and The Prowl.
Prowl wouldn't know about The Prowl.
Prime would go to his grave before he would admit that he asked Ratchet to design them.
=0=The Resort
The Judys and Lois rode around the golf course hole-to-hole to inspect it against the tournament the following morning. It was IMMACULATE, having been put to rights by Marcellus of the Hu An. She had been an ornamental landscape artist who knew how to make a desert bloom, thus she was consulted on nearly every decorative design aspect in the colony both bots and humans.
"It was genius having Marcellus come and go over this. We want it to be perfect," Lois said.
"This is a fully regulation course with a difficult par and I want the Earth to know we take this shit seriously," Judy Witwicky said as they sped by a sand trap shortly to be known as Casa del Ironhide.
"It'll be good when we can use it again given the whining from the guests," Judy Fulton replied. "I can't wait for this. Some of them aren't that great of a player but Prime is said to be glorious."
"Since when isn't he?" Lois replied.
Everyone agreed.
=0=The Hourly News that night
"Welcome back. This is Aleph with the news at 2200 joors on the TMC. Tonight's top stories are the altercation at the Metro station in City 2 of District 6, preparations for the music festival in Helex for Elder's Day, the results of the elections for the primary of District One Councilor seats and the charity golf tournament that will be held in the Resort of Autobot City in the morning.
"According to the Office of the Attorney General, the shooting in City 2 has resulted in two dead and four wounded, some seriously. None of the names of the dead are being released but it would appear that they were members of a youth group which indicates possibilities of gang affiliation. The group which is part of the Gang Task Force's watch list had confronted another one on the platform and after a brief altercation broke out weapons and began to fire.
"Waiting on the platform across from them were a number of senior Autobots including Optimus Prime. After a few moments of furious fire, the situation was brought to a conclusion. Twenty-two youngsters were arrested with charges pending.
"Ten were taken to hospital where one was declared dead upon arrival and the other died shortly after while in surgery for a direct shot to the helm.
"The authorities are withholding all information pending investigation. When that's concluded the Office of the Attorney General will release details.
"In other news, the Roving Festival Association is finalizing plans for a block party in Helex during Elder Day. There will be continuous live music and lots of food and drink available with games for children and places to sit and enjoy the fun. The Food Truck Coalition will be gathered near Central Plaza in the pocket kiddie park on 12th and Main.
"Dancing will be possible at the band stand which is going to be placed in front of the City Hall on Main and First Avenue. Artists will be there to share their wares and buskers will be plying their skills as well. We talked to Chief Springer of the Night and Day Watch about the upcoming festivities."
The screen cut to a shot of Springer with Drift nearby holding his horse as Lim-Lee interviewed him outside of the Watch Tower in Metrotitan.
"Chief Springer, what can you tell me about security preparations for the festival in Helex on Elder's Day?" she asked.
"We plan to keep a low profile during the fun and let people have a good time. If there's drunks or trouble we can come swiftly. We've beefed up our presence at substations 67 and 68 so we can field whatever happens. There's also going to be double the usual horseback patrols. The kids love the horses so win-win."
"What can you tell me if anything about the shooting the other orn in the Metro?" Lim-Lee asked.
"Not much. It's been referred to the Attorney General's Office because there were deaths involved. Until they release information we can't," Springer said.
"Thank you, Chief," Lim-Lee said. "Now back to the studio."
Aleph reappeared. "There will be a medical presence in the area on the scene and all referrals will go to Helex Medical Center for treatment. The festival is to begin at 0800 and expected to last until 0400 the next morning. Check the Community Bulletin Board for details.
"In political news the District One primary elections for the Colonial District Council have been concluded with the outcome the general election in two weeks. All of the Tier One district representatives ran for their offices with the results posted to the Elections folder on the Community Bulletin Board and the IntraCom website.
"District Seven's race between the incumbent Glossy of Torus States and Amenuel of Uraya will be reheld in a runoff in three orns. Voting will be electronic and all members of these districts will receive their ballots by text.
Districts Tiers 2-16 will be held in staggered intervals as usual and all who have interest are encouraged to stand for election. Check the politics folder in the Community Bulletin Board to find out when your district is going to hold elections. The general election for Tier One will be held to determine final representation and everyone is encouraged to vote.
"The Bureau of Election Integrity released figures supporting a total of 96% participation in this election." Aleph grinned. "That's very impressive."
"In final news, the Elder Day-Father's Day Golf Tournament that will raise funds for charities on Earth for animals and elders will be held tomorrow morning at the regulation golf course at The Resort at Autobot City. The challenge was laid down to the senior Autobots and accepted by Optimus Prime himself.
"The humans asked that the Cybertronian players do so in pretender gear that will reduce them in size and strength to human dimensions, thus making it more equal and fair, or so they say. They agreed so long as the tournament ran on Cybertronian golfing rules." Aleph grinned. "I didn't know until now that we both played golf and had rules.
"Nevertheless, Commander Jazz has been delegated to tell everyone involved what the rules are, all of which were posted to the sports folders of the Community Bulletin Board by Pulsar who is director for Colonial Sports. We now cut to Jacx and Jazz."
The screen changed to two handsome mechs standing on the golf course that was the colony's own. Both mechs were handsome and looked like fun.
"Commander Jazz, what can you tell me about the Cybertronian rules for golf that you were delegated to release?"
Jazz smiled, a beautiful sight altogether. "You know that Prime's a sportsman and any game is fair game if you know what I mean. He devised the rules for Cybertronian golf for the tournament. He also tried to figure out how to make it a contact sport but gave up considering how squishy you humans are. He asked me to tell them to you and the zillions waiting to see what will obviously be a much improved version of a human sport."
Jacx laughed. "Please … do tell."
"Don't mind if I do," Jazz said with a big grin. "There's rules that apply to this and that. There's also onsite penalties. First, you have to play in duos with human partners one of the pair. For the first three holes you play with your partner. Then the next three you switch it up, bot and human. That alternates all the way through every three holes.
"If the human scores more than the Cybertronian then they have to arm wrestle to keep the score. If you win, human, you keep the score. If you lose, you get 3 strokes added. Vice versa as well."
"So you change partners every three holes and if the humans do better than the bots you arm wrestle for a three point penalty," Jacx summarized.
"I think I just said that," Jazz said as they both laughed uproariously.
=0=Human habitats
"Oh fuck."
=0=Jazz and Jacx
"It gets better. When you get stuck in a sand trap there's penalties. The penalty is that you have to switch the side of your swing. If you're right handed you have to swing from your left. If you land in the water, your own partner get to take the balls of your human opponents and throw them backward as hard and far as you can."
"What about if a human gets stuck in the water. Do they get the same opportunity?" Jacx asked.
Jazz smirked. "Why?"
=0=Human Habitats
"Oh fuck. Fuck us."
=0=Jacx and Jazz
"What about the roughs?" Jacx asked.
"You have to play your way out of them blindfolded."
=0=Bot game players
"BWAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
=0=Human Habitats
"WHAT THE FUCK!? PRIME!"
Wives of the players:
"BWAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
=0=Up in a penthouse watching the news
"Well, I concur with the rules." Prowl grinned. "I noticed that you left the good one out."
Prime grinned. "I know."
=0=TBC 06-26-2021