-1Wow… Thank you thank you again for all of your wonderful reviews and replies they really mean a lot to me and they are the reason that I keep writing this, not to mention it just keeps pouring out of me for you guys so please enjoy and please let me know what you think.

Rosebud

-Part 4- Slipping First Half

"Are you sure you are alright son?" John Winchester asked as they pulled back up to the Lucky Star, the three men having decided it was best if they skipped out on breakfast after the scare they had given the poor waitress. Besides that Dean's stomach felt nothing like eating now, it was tied in ten… maybe twenty knots his head spinning with confusion as he tried silently to figure out what the hell was going on inside of him. "Dean?" He reached up into the front passengers seat placing his hand on his son's shoulder and studying him through the rearview mirror.

His skin was so pale now that it almost had a transparent tint to it, except of course for the deep black circles that swallowed his eyes that were hidden under the dark sunglasses making him at least appear semi-normal to the unknowing eye. "huh?."

"Nothing." John frowned toward Sam as he opened the passenger door and slowly helped his brother from the car. The two men sharing a worried glance.

"There you go…. You got it…" Sam cleared his throat his arm securely around his brothers still freezing body as they made there way into the hotel room and toward the bed.

"You know Sammy…" Dean smiled a little a obviously fake forced smile in his brothers direction… "I think you are beginning to enjoy me being in this situation a little to much."

"Oh yes Dean…. Immensely" Sam retorted as he replaced his shoes on the side of the bed next to the night stand which was now missing it's center piece lamp. He rolled his eyes even though his brother could not see….

"And don't you roll your eyes at me boy!"

"Would you just try to get some rest already?" Sam asked as he brought the blankets back up and around Deans body.

"I'm supposed to be helping you and dad and you know that."

"Yes, but the first thing you need to worry about is yourself and you look like you haven't slept since we left Louisiana well over a week ago and came to this coursed state.

Dean settled for another unwelcoming facial expression before rolling over on to his side and grunting at his brother.

"Pout all you want you are still going to get some rest."

"Pansy!"

"Prick." Sam shot back without even blinking as he took a seat on the bed opposite Dean's next to his father, this was by far the hardest case either man had ever worked after all it wasn't just someone else on the line, this was Sam's brother, John's son…. Their family, the glue that holds them together. No matter what dean's mouth said they knew he was breaking, that something was breaking him,…. Something was stronger than him and they needed to figure out what….

Each moment that past by without a cell phone ring or a text message, each moment that nothing was heard from the people who john had working this case… helping him, researching this vaguely known creature of the dark, we're moments lost, and moments that brought dean closer and closer to whoever it was she was leading him….

"He's gonna be alright…" John whispered looking over at his youngest son whose head was bowed almost what would appear to be in defeat as he felt his dad place a hand on his knee and squeeze lightly.

"I-I know…. I just feel." Sam shrugged, "Helpless, like there is more we should be doing you know?" He made sure to keep his voice a hushed whisper whipping nervously at his upper lip as he spoke,

"And what do you suppose we should be doing?"

"Anything!"

"If we go in there bli-" John stopped for a moment and rethought his wording before continuing knowing Sam's mental state was questionable right now…."Sam if we go in there without knowing what to expect…. Without any idea on how to kill this bitch we are only going to end up as badf off as your brother if not worse…."

"How are we going to find out what went on in there…?"

John sighed a little looking over at the restlessly sleeping form on the bed and then back to Sam. Whose eyes grew bigger than grapefruits as he shook his head defiantly.

"No, You've seen it for yourself, he can't even say that things name without finding himself in excruciating pain…. You are not going to make him tell you!"

"Sam, it's the only way…"

"I don't care, Sam's voice was near a growl now, "I don't give a shit, we are just going to have to look twice as hard for something else then because I am not going to let you purposely make him suffer."

"Sam-" John's voice was now laced with hurt as he listened to the words pouring so freely from his youngest boy's mouth that he knew he had to be speaking the truth, that this was how he really felt.

"I said no dad. He's not just some guinea pig he's your son, and right now he needs your help…. Your love, and your support to pull through this thing…"

"He's strong!" Sam sputtered out quickly in an attempt to get a word in.

"Of course he is… You built him that way, You built us that way… But we are more than your warriors, and in a time like this that is what you need to remember…." Sam breathed a small sigh of relief when his brother's scream interrupted the heated conversation that had so quickly escalated, slicing through the animosity in the room like a chainsaw.

Both men shot up in unison and made there way across the room Sam kneeling close to his head and John a little further down placing his hand on his son's stomach. "Dean…. It's just a nightmare…" His voice shook as he attempted to sooth watching the young man's face contort into a look of pain so deep and so scaring it sent a chill through his spine.

"Shh…" Sam gripped on to his hand prying his white knuckles from the bed sheets and locking it in his grasp….

"It's alright… Wake-up now Dean come on…. She can't get you it's just a dream…" His voice was soothing , soft yet firm as he spoke.

Dean's body jerked as the sweat now poured freely from his forehead coating his face, his eye lids flew open, and just as every time before, his head ached with a dull pain his breath hitched in his throat every time he tried to fill his lungs with air forcing himself to breathe. And just as every time before he fought back the tears from spilling from his sightless eyes and making with the sweat trails down his forehead….

"These nightmares really are beginning to get the best of you... You're burning up now" Sam whispered patting his hand before rising to his feet and heading into the bathroom to get a cold washcloth.

"Do you want to talk about it?" John prodded gently not wanting to push the subject matter but at the same time at a loss for what to say….

Sam glared at his father as he returned kneeling down his face over his brothers as he hovered over him like a protective mother hen inspecting her chicks. "I'd imagine he doesn't want to talk about much of anything right now…."

Dean jumped a little noting now just how far into his persona; bubble his brother had traveled. "It's alright Sammy…. I'm fine." His voice was stronger than his body appeared to be and all three men knew it was a front….

"You are not fine, now this is going to be a little cold." He folded the cloth putting it on his brother's forehead and frowning at the few choice words that were directed at him…

"Christ Sam! A little cold! Ice in my underwear is warmer than this you bastard!" He brought his hand up and tried to force the cloth from his face.

"It's gotta stay there."

"I'm so going to beat the living shit out of you as soon as I'm feeling like my self again…"

"That's fine." Sam looked toward his father who was obviously lost in his own thought, or maybe even buried in his own guilt as he stared off into space from where he kneeled next to the bed.. "Dad?"

"Hm?"

"Stay with him." Sam ordered more than asked as he rose from his spot next to the bed…

"Where do you think you're going in my car Sammy boy?"

"I've got a few things I need to pick up is all…"

"Sam?"

"Don't worry Dean, I'll be right back alright?"

"I wouldn't want to hear about you going off and trying to have fun without me now…"

"I won't I promise."

"Good. Are you gonna stop and schmooze with that cute little desk clerk on your way out?"

"How did you-"

"I know everything… I'm the oldest remember?"

"Yeah sure."

"So you are going to stop and schmooze then?"

"No- As cute as she is… or might be- We have more pressing issues at hand right now."

"Are you sure because I am so totally willing to put my health on hold for you if it means you finally get some dude…."

"I'm positive… Dad walk me out."

John nodded giving Dean's hand a slight squeeze "I'll be right back."

"What is this your first day of school?" Dean quipped. "I'm blind not stupid I know your going to go out there to talk about me so…"

"Dean"

"Sam."

Sam simply shook his head stepping outside into the cool mid-morning air it was now somewhere near ten am. His father was close behind him, "What is it Sam?"

"Do not press him while I'm gone dad…"

"I won't…."

"I mean it dad, look at him, he's slipping…"

"Where are you going?"

"To get him some help."

"What kind of help?"

"Well maybe we can't cure him right now, but at least we can try to get his strength up right?"

John nodded before stepping back into the room and returning to his brothers bedside as Sam peeled out of the parking lot.

"Where is he really going pop?"

"You know your brother he can't sit still… especially not with something like this going on."

"So where is he going?"

"I'm not supposed to worry you."

"Since when are you the one receiving orders from him?"

John frowned disapprovingly of that statement but decided now was not the time to argue. "You just get some rest will you?"

- Pulling up in front of the local county hospital Sam reached into the glove box of his brothers car and fished out the small wooden box popping it open and fishing through the countless number of fake badges with false names…..

"Doctor Benatovich." He mumbled to himself clipping it to his shirt pocket and stuffing the others back into the glove box before climbing out of the car. Under normal circumstances he hated the whole false identity idea but right about now he was willing to do anything to help his brother.

Stepping up to the front desk of the nurses station he cleared his throat praying to god this was going to work as he adjusted the color of the baby blue button down shirt he had found in Dean's trunk.

"How may I help you?-" She paused for a moment noting the medical name tag and smiling at him, "Doctor Benatovich?"

"I was just wondering if I could speak to your chief of staff here about a any position openings that you might have? You see I just transferred into the area from Topeka and I hear that you are the best unit around to work for…."

The woman's smile broadened and Sam knew he had struck a cord by the googley eyes she was now giving him, he could never quite understand exactly what it was these innocent younger women saw in him, but he never fought it either, not if he was working a case and he knew it was going to pay off in some way…. He really was turning in to his brother…. "Yes sir… He is and I do believe we just had a position open up…. They are in a meeting right now…"

Shining her a very charming smile he licked his lips lightly, "A meeting? Oh that's to bad, I have an interview with another facility in about an hour… I just thought you know this being the best care provider in the state of Kansas from what I've heard I would try here first-"

"Wait! Don't leave!" She rose from her seat at her desk and came around to the other side, "I-I'm sure that they are nearly done by now, I'll just go and get him alright?"

"Oh no, I couldn't ask you to interrupt his meeting."

"It's-It's no problem really she batted her eyelashes as she scurried off down the long hospital corridor leaving Sam alone on the nearly empty floor…. Already having spotted the medicine closet while he was "flirting" with the on call nurse it would only take him moments to slip in and slip out before she even returned to her post….

As soon as she was far enough away he slipped in and began searching through that bottles on the many counters in the small closet room, "Amobarbital"

He nodded to himself and slipped the bottle into his pocket slipping out of the hospital and back to the car with the ease of a cheetah stalking a turtle he was headed back to the hotel.

- "Dad?"

"Hmmm?" John Winchester was pulled once more from his thoughts as Dean turned his attention toward where he knew his father was sitting by his side and away from The Oprah Winfrey Show he was listening to.

"If- You know, something happens, and I don't make it through this…" He cleared his throat giving his father a moment to interject.

"Dean-"

"Just listen to me alright?"

"Okay Son, but nothing is going to happen to you…."

"If something does…" He started again, "You're going to have to watch Sam, this whole mom and the demon thing…. Trust me if anyone knows I know how important it is to not just you but to all of us…. He's only 23 years old dad… He never wanted this…. And maybe you know? If this is my short straw then you two should give it up for a while…. Let him go back to school… give him the life he wanted?"

"We are Hunters Dean."

"You and I are Hunters dad… Sam is just the brains of the operation stuck in the middle…"

"We are not going to have this discussion Dean"

"Dad, without me to protect him…. He's going to get himself killed out there-"

"Dea-"

"Hey there you two." Sam's re-entrance into the room halted all conversation as he put down a small McDonalds bag and slipped the pills from his pocket placing them on the table. "Don't stop the talking on my account."

"It was a boring conversation anyway." Dean sat up a little leaning against the head board. "I smell food- where did you scurry off to?"

"I see Oprah." Sam chuckled walking over and turning down the television.

"I'm sick I can watch what I want…" Dean retorted lamely.

"And what's the topic of choice today?"

"Older brothers seeking revenge on their secret keeping younger sibling!"

"Wow- Sounds interesting…" Sam chuckled shaking his head as he took the top off the double cheese burger and busted one of the sedatives into the ketchup spreading it around giving his father a slight nod as he noticed himself being watched.

"It really is…" Dean felt the burger slipped into his fingers and frowned…

"You have to eat…"

"I know."

"Then don't give me that look dude."

Dean's chin trembled as he bit into the not so tasty burger and swallowed it nearly whole….

"This just…. Sucks…." He mumbled as he nearly finished the burger the sedative not taking to long to take effect as they watched his wrist go lax his body following suite.

"What did you give him?" John asked as He took the small piece of burger that remained from his fingers and lifting his body placing down further on the bed before removing his sunglasses. And placing them on the nightstand.

"Amobarbital… it's a sedative…."

"How did you get it?"

"Dean's not the only one who picked up the tricks of your trade you know?"