-TRANSMISSION ONLINE-
-Beginning ECHO Review Log-
It was once again that special time of year in space. The solar winds held a chill, snow was drifting slowly by the starship graveyard that surrounded the SOL… Wait what?
Inside the control room, Everyone was sitting around and admiring their handy work as they looked over piles of aliens, robots, and Scavs.
(Gaige) As tough of a fight as that was, it left me wiped out.
(Torgue) I've never used so much ammo in my f*cking life! I fired so much ammo it caused the f*cking barrels of my gun to melt!
He held up an Ogre assault rifle with a slightly melted barrel.
(Tina) I'm actually completely out of explosives.
(Kilo8) You… Out of explosives? I never thought I'd live to see the day. Luckily...
Kilo pulled out a package from behind him and tossed it to Tina.
(Kilo8) Happy Mercenary day!
Tina ripped the package open and screamed in joy.
(Tina) AAAH! An Unkempt Harold, and in pink and white! ThankyouThankyouThankyou!
(Gaige) Huh. I guess it is Mercenary day. We've been so busy fighting I forgot what day it is.
(Kilo) Well luckily I managed to make another Mercenary day present for you guys and our audience.
He held up a glowing blue crystal, marked by a holographic number twelve.
"NEW CHAPTER!" The others cheered.
(Gaige) I'll upload the file!
She grabs the crystal and runs out of the room.
(Tina) I got the popcorn!
(Torgue) I'll clear the destroyed robot parts from the theater!
(Kilo8) Well, while they're doing that, here's a few quick notes. First sorry about the late chapter, first, it was because of a bad case of writer's block, then there was the alien invasion here… Yeeeeah. Next, about polls I 'tried' to set up for the previous chapter… I realized I forgot to turn their visibility on. Of course I can't seem to get more than one poll at a time to go, plus it doesn't seem to appear on the mobile app. So I'll be posting the question here, you can leave your choice in the comment section. Here are the questions.
One : Which character should receive the Excalibasterd? Your choices are any of the playable Vault Hunters from Borderlands 2 only and Kai, and you can only pick one.
Two : Which clan would you side with at the end of the Clan Wars, Zaford's or Hodunk's? Note this also determines the rewards and future jokes.
Three : Which quest reward would you like to see in the story from the A.I. core mission, Shotgun 1340 or Shield 1340? As for who will get the reward that has been determined already and is a surprise, so please don't ask.
(Kilo8) Please note that it only one vote for each poll per person. I'd also like to ask if anyone has any idea as to how I increase the number of polls I can have on my profile, that would be very helpful.
*BOOM!*
(Tina) Popcorn is ready!
(Kilo8) *Sigh* Not again.
*BOOM!*
(Torgue) THEATER IS CLEAN!
(Kilo8) . . . At Least Gaige should be fine.
*BOOM!*
(Gaige) Sorry! Also the chapter is ready.
(Kilo8) . . . Let's just start the chapter. Please remember to stick around at the end for some other news. And lastly... Happy Holidays to everyone, and enjoy the show!
-ECHO Transmission interrupted-
X-X-X
Disclaimer: I do not own Borderlands or any of it characters, Borderlands is owned by Gearbox Software and 2K Games, the only ownership I claim is of my own OC's. This is a story just for your fun and enjoyment. Please enjoy.
X-X-X
Stories text formats
"Talking"
'Thinking'
"Echo/Radio"
'Krieg's inner voice'
X-X-X
Chapter Beta Read by "Redemption's Avenger"
X-X-X
Chapter 12
Damned to hell
It was dark and early (Since it was the middle of Pandoran night) as the occupants of Ellie's garage began to stir. Axton walked into Ellie's kitchen to find everyone but the teens and Ellie there. "Mor-*Yawn*-ning." Axton said as he walked over to coffee maker and poured himself a cup and then poured in the contents of a yellow container next to it. As he mixes the cup he looks around to see Loggins and Salvador were cooking. At the table, Maya was eating what looked like scrambled eggs as she read one of Hammerlock's old printed almanacs she had brought. Krieg was messing with his ECHO next to her while Zer0 was checking his sword's digistruct unit across from him. Axton finally finished stirring his coffee and then immediately took a swig of it only to stop and look down at the mug. "Why does this creamer taste like jet fuel?" Axton asked.
"Because that can of 'creamer' is jet fuel." Loggins said as he snatched the can out of Axton's hand.
Axton looked back to the mug and shrugged. "Eh, I've had worse." He said before he continued to drink. "Actually it reminds me of Merdock's antifreeze marinade, only without the partial paralalysis." That got a few raised eyebrows but nobody asked. It was several minutes till Axton asked. "So… Where's everyone else?"
"Well, Ellie's putting the final touches on your ride." Loggins said.
"Actually I just gawd darn finished." Said an oil and grease covered Ellie as she walked in with Hati next to her. "I just have to wait for the digistruct system to finish scanning it, and y'all be ready to go."
"Great… Also where is Red and the ruffian?"
"Don't know, offered my bed to the little redhead since I was gonna be busy all night, as for Kai… I don't really know."
"Well, we better go find and wake them. Come on Sal." Maya said as she got up. Sal hung his apron up and followed Maya, as did Hati. Ten minutes later the two Vault Hunter both came up with nothing they met up in a hallway. "Well I found some of her gear in Ellie's room but it looks like she didn't sleep there at all." Maya said. "Any luck with Kai?"
"Nah, I can't find him anywhere. Although..." Sal turned away from Maya. "he might know." He said as stared down the hall to where Hati was sitting by the stairs to the roof. So the two Vault Hunters followed the wolf to the roof. When they got there, they found something neither of them expected.
Leaning back against the roof edge wall was Kai, who was soundly asleep. The real interesting sight though was that Gaige was asleep as well, using Kai's legs as a makeshift pillow. "Oh my gosh, that is just adorable!" Maya quietly whispered as Sal just chuckled. With that, they both proceed to pull out their ECHO's and snap several photos of the sleeping pair. "So how should we wake them?" Maya asked.
Sal thought about it till he snapped his fingers. "I got it. Get your ECHO's video recorder ready." Maya opened up the app and gave Sal a thumbs up, as Sal tiptoed over to the teens. He leaned over near Gaige's head and said in a whimsical whisper. "Wakey, Wakey kids! It time to wake up~!"
Gaige stirred a little as tried to bury her head into her pillow. "Mmm, five more minutes. I'm too comfy..."
"*Yawn* Why do my legs feel heavy?" Kai mumbled.
Gaige's eyes suddenly shot open as the realization of where she was laying finally finished processing . She immediately jumped up, hitting Kai in the chin with the back of her head, knocking him over. Salvador jumped back as the teen blushed a bright red.
"OhgeezlookatthetimeIneedtogogetreadyforthedayokeybye!" She bolted off the roof, down the stairs and out of sight, slamming shut her room's door seconds later.
Sal, Maya, and Hati looked back to Kai who was on his back, nursing a bruised jaw. "Oww… First, what just happened? Second, why do I suddenly feel like the butt end of a cosmic joke?" He asked.
The three observers just looked to one another for several seconds before they each began to laugh. "HA HA HA! THAT WAS PERFECT!" Sal said.
"And we got it on tape for later too!" Maya said as another fit of hysterical laughter came over them as the Vault Hunters made their way back downstairs, leaving a bewildered Kai with a snickering wolf.
"Seriously? Anyone? What just happened?"
X-X-X
Off someplace else in the ECHO Network, Angel was shifting through mountains of code and info as she typically did every morning. As she was a sub-screen popped up in front of her, informing her of a new ECHO mail. She stared at the window for several seconds in confusion. 'Nobody ever mails me… Who even has my ECHOmail address? Wait, did I even set one up?'
After staring at the message for a minute her curiosity won out and she pressed the open icon, opening a video file, one where Kai and Gaige were sleeping together in a cute fashion making Angel choo. As she watched her expressions went from curiosity to sudden shock, and finally pure historical laugher. During this time on Pandora, the ECHO net started to glitch out. Finally, after several minutes Angel stopped laughing and looked at the rest of the message to find several cute photos of the teens and a short typed message. Kaige is real! Maya.
Angel smiled and immediately saved the message to a personal secure file she kept. "Thank you Maya, you just made my day… Or is it just starting?" She said, grinning mischievously.
X-X-X
About twenty minutes later everyone but Zer0 and Gaige was standing in front of the garage facing Ellie, who was standing in front of the closed doors. Finally, Gaige emerged, looking flustered and angry
"Well, look who decided to finally wake up." Maya said with a grin as Sal tried to hold a laugh.
"Screw you guys." Gaige said as she walked over and stood next to Kai.
"You okay?" Kai asked.
"I should be asking you that." Gaige shot back.
"Wait? Do you know what happened? Because I don't know and this 'mutt' won't tell me." He said jabbing his thumb towards Hati who was... whistling. . . 'That's a new one.' Gaige thought.
"If yall are done over there, I like to get this little show and tell over with so I can get some sleep!" Ellie said. With that everyone brought their attention to Ellie.
"Ladies and big babies."
"HEY!" Both Axton and Sal yelled as Kai just ignored it and Krieg just chuckled.
"I'd like to introduce yall to your new hawt ass rides!" Slapping a control, both of the garages opened up to reveal two Bandit Technicals being driven out by Loggin's and Zer0. Loggins was in the standard buzzsaw variant while Zer0's was a catapult type. Both vehicles were muddied up to look like the typical Technical.
"Cool, now I just have one questi-"
"It's scanned into the Catch-a-ride and backed up." Ellie interjected.
"Had to be sure." Kai said.
"All right, with that out of the way is everyone geared up?" Axton asked, getting several confirmations. "Good, then mount up."
Axton and Sal jumped into Zer0's truck, while everyone took the other. Kai took the driver's seat while Gaige took the turret. Maya and Krieg got in the back. "Thanks again Ellie." Kai said.
"Any time y'all. Don't be strangers, ya hear me."
"Roger that. We're ready!" Kai called to the other Technical.
"Alright then, Zer0 we got the lead, we're oscar mike." Axton yelled. And with that, the two Bandit Technicals raced out of Ellie's junkyard, Leaving Ellie and Loggins standing next to each other.
"Well, that was interesting. Cute kids."
"Yup… How much you want to bet those kids will start dating?" Loggins asked.
"Please! It's not a matter of if, but a matter of when... I give them a month tops." Ellie replied.
". . . I'll take that bet."
X-X-X
It had been about two hours into the trip, and everyone was either driving or bored. At the moment Kai was arguing with Hati over possible modifications that could be made to the Bandit Technicals design. Gaige was only listening with half an ear as she just watched the landscape go by until her Whisper activated and a familiar voice filled her ear. "Well good day Gaige. Did you have a 'comfortable' time sleeping last night?"
Gaige flushed, turning away from the others. "Angel! What the hell are you talking about?" Gaige demanded in a hushed whisper. A holo screen popped up in front of her face with an image of Kai and Gaige sleeping with her head in his lap. Gaige's whole face turned beet red as she quickly took down the screen. "Are you insane! What if Kai saw that!"
"Relax, he's too busy arguing to notice, just look."
"No, no, a saw turret is better than a catapult turret hands down."
Woof, woof!"
"DPS! What DPS! That's crazy talk!" Kai replied.
She glanced to the back where Maya and Krieg were. Maya was reading something on her Echo, not paying any attention to anything else while Krieg was playing airplane with his Buzz axe off the side.
Gaige turned back away from the others. "Okay... point... But still, why are you calling?"
"To ask how it was, I mean you must have been very comfortable and trusting of Kai for that to happen. Did anything else happen last night?"
"What! No! No, no, no, we just talked. That it, I swear!"
"Aww, is little Red getting flustered." Maya whispered into her ear causing Gaige to give a small yelp. She quickly looked to Kai to see he was still arguing with Hati. She then turned and glared at Maya who had a playful smirk.
"How are-" Gaige began to ask till Maya pulled out a small device from her ear.
"An old Tac-Comm earpiece Axton gave me last night. Mostly so I could listen to a couple of audiobooks, but also so I can hear... you know."
"Hi, Maya."
"Good to hear from you. Now, tell us all the details." Maya said.
"There nothing to tell, we just talked."
"About ~"
". . . His parents… and how they died." Gaige said which immediately killed the mood.
"Oh/oh." Both the siren and A.I. said. No one said anything for about a minute until Angel spoke up. "Well, did you talk about anything else… Do anything else?~"
"You two are just incorrigible." Gaige muttered as both women giggled. "We just talked a little and stared at the stars till we fell asleep."
"Awww, how romantic~." Maya teased.
"It wasn't like that!" Gaige muttered.
"Sure, and I'm not a construct made of one's and zero's."
"Ugh, what do you two want?!"
"We want nothing, other than for you to realize you're in denial."
"In denial? In denial of what?"
"That you actually…" She glanced at Kai. "Loov- Uph!" Maya suddenly found her mouth covered by Gaige's robot hand.
"Finish that sentence and I'll use you for DT's next weapons test." Gaige glared, voice low and deadly. "And didn't we go over this? He's not my boyfriend, he's my friend. Got it?!"
"Oh come on Gaige, don't be like that! You guys are always paired up during missions. What you two have can easily be called more than friendship." Angel pleaded.
"There is nothing between us." Gaige ground out.
"Oh, keep telling yourself that, it will only be a matter of time." Maya said with a sly grin.
Gaige just stared at her for several seconds until she grinned wickedly, unnerving the Siren. "Well what about you Maya? You've never even had a boyfriend~. And you're older than me at the same time..."
"WHAT!? Maya, how come you haven't told me!" Angel said as Maya groaned.
"Dammit Gaige, now she's on my case too!" Maya said before moving back to the rear of the truck as Angel was babbling away about changing her looks, what to look for, and who were potential prospects. Gaige just giggled at Maya's misery. Although Angel's last words did bug her. 'What you two have can easily be called more than friendship.' Rang through her head.
Gaige glanced to Kai as the thought repeated in her several more times. Was there actually more to their friendship. Sure Kai admittedly was cute, in a way, but… She actually wasn't sure what to think about Kai. They were friends, sure, but was there anything else between them. Could there be something betwee-.
THUNK!*
Gaige snapped her neck around and saw a flaming saw blade had impaled itself into the back of the cab section. Gaige looked back and saw two Bandit Technicals following them. "Evil go-kart shooting turtle shell off the port stern!" Krieg yelled out.
"GOT IT" Kai yelled as he swerved right as a barrel flew off to there left.
"Angel, will talk later." Gaige said before disconnecting the call. With that, all previous thoughts were put away as she began to fire back at the Bandits.
Several hours later the gang finally arrived at the Bloodshots stronghold again and parked outside. "So, you guys ready?" Axton asked.
"All set here." Maya replied as she and Krieg ducked down to avoid being seen.
"Come on! Let's go already!" Sal, giddy for a fight.
Gaige leaned a little closer to Kai and whispered. "So how is this going to go down? I mean, we really don't have a plan for this?"
"They're Bandits Gaige. The plan is and almost always will be to have bigger and better guns and use overwhelming firepower… Actually that's... basically the unspoken law of Pandora." Kai said just as Zer0 honked his car horn twice.
After about several seconds the lazy bandit from the day before came over the open ECHO's. "Hey boss, we got company outside the gate."
"Hmmm. They look like ours! Let 'em in while I try to get Hyperion back on the horn!"
The gate opened up all the way and both vehicles drove into a small motor pool. (Before anyone asks. I took some creative liberties with the world building in some places. Just go with it.)
As soon as both trucks were through the gate Kai and Zer0 swerved into a wedge formation as Gaige and Axton opened up with their turrets. Axton first lobbed an explosive barrel into a guard tower causing it and the lazy bandit inside to explode in a shower of shrapnel. Gaige started raking the area of any Bloodshots insight with flaming saw blades that quickly began to maul any Bandits in their paths. The rest of the Vault Hunters jumped out and began to lay down fire. After a minute-long shootout the area was cleared and the Vault Hunters abandoned the trucks and rushed towards the dam.
They raced around several buildings only to all stop as they discovered that there was a large gap between them and the dam. The only way through was a closed drawbridge... That looked like a monstrous face. "Did not expect this." Axton said.
"We got an intruder! GET 'EM, BADMAW!" Flanksteak yelled over the open ECHO's.
"Ooooh crap." Kai said.
"What wrong?" Gaige asked slightly worried by his tone. With a groan, the drawbridge started to open.
"Well… You guys remember Rad Max yesterday?" Kai asked.
A massive figure suddenly jumped from the top of the drawbridge and landed with a loud thud, cratering the ground. It was a massive nomad who was as big as Max but had his hood up. In his left arm, he held a massive shield.
"We'll meet his buddy, Bad Maw."
Bad Maw hefted his shield up and over and slammed it into the ground in front of him, which revealed three Psycho midgets chained to the front of it. "Oh, and his merry midgets. How could I 'frakking' forget." Kai yelled in displeasure as everyone but Krieg ran for cover. "KRIEG GET TO COVER!" Kai yelled.
But the Psycho Vault Hunter didn't listen, charging at the Nomad "WHO WANTS THE FIRST SLICE OF PIZZA!" Krieg yelled as he leaped at Bad Maw. With a wide and fast left swing, Bad Maw bashed the shield into him and knocked him back several meters. Krieg lifted his head and said in a daze. "Look at the rainbow Rakks!"
"I'm seeing them too… which worries me." His inner voice said.
"Krieg! RUUUUUN!" Axton yelled as Bad Maw pulled out a kevlar coated Tediore shotgun and started firing at Krieg as he scrambled to the nearest cover which happened to be a wall that Kai and Gaige were hiding behind. Just before he reached it Bad Maw threw his shotgun at him which fell a meter short of him and exploded, propelling him over the wall and in front of the two teens. "I need mommy's kiss."
"I think you're gonna need more than that Krieg." Gaige said.
"Actually he was asking for an aspirin." Kai corrected her.
"Seriously!? I'm never gonna figure out how his vocabulary works."
"Give it time." Kai said as he fired a few shots.
"Hey, kids, enough chit-chat. Kai you know this guy. What's his deal?" Axton asked over the ECHO.
"He's a straightforward tank. Takes a lot and dishes it back, and like most nomads, he tends to try and stay behind his shield which-" An explosion from a grenade interrupted them as it pelted them with ice and dirt. "Which even my Clementine would have trouble penetrating."
"And the midgets?" Maya asked.
"He… honestly, I don't know. I think he just likes to torment them." Kai admitted as he reloaded his Fast Talker.
"Well, what do we do then?" Maya shouted as she popped up and shot a few quick bursts from her Dahl SMG, of which the shots were absorbed by the midgets who yelled in angered pain as Bad Maw just laughed. One of the bullets did manage to hit and break one of the chains restraining the midgets, which a certain assassin noticed.
"Don't look at me, me and Reiss always had to run from the guy!" Kai yelled. "It's not like he has some glaring-"
Two sniper shots suddenly cracked into the air as both shots hit and broke the remaining two chains on the shield. This caused the Midgets to fall down and look around in confusion until they turned to Bad Maw. "Ugh, ha ha. . . No hard feeling guys. . . Guys?"
The three midgets suddenly all pulled out rusty shivs, yelling, in typical Psycho speech the lead, "RIP HIS STUFFING OUT! FEAST ON HIS RIB CAGE FROM THE INSIDE!" They all jumped at the Nomad, trying to stab him as Bad Maw started to flail about and shot his shotgun wildly. Everyone just watched as the scuffle was occurring.
"Should… Should we-" Maya started to ask.
"No." Zer0 said as he walked over. "They have been unshackled / Free to exact their vengeance / Just leave them be."
So as the midgets proceed to beat Bad Maw they all start to look around for a way to open the bridge as the fight continue. They finally find a large well decorated with bullets all around it. Axton and Sal gave it a try turn but it didn't budge. "Look like it needs a key, hombre."
"So then how will we get across?" Gaige asked.
"We need to find someone of high enough rank who would have a key." Maya said. To which everyone turned to Bad Maw who was still fighting the midgets. One was currently on his shoulders trying to stab his head through the hood he wore with a rusty spork. "GONNA RIP OUT YOUR EYES AND SHIT IN YOUR DEAD SKULL!"
"Well, you guys know the drill." Axton said as he brought his rifle up. Everyone just stared at him as he just stood there at the ready, it took him a moment to realize nobody knew what he was doing. With a sigh, he pointed to Bad Maw. "Shoot the officer then loot what you need." He said which got a resounding "Ooooh" from everyone but Zer0. With that they brought up their weapons, finally alerting Bad Maw and the three midgets.
"Whaaa?" Bad Maw said.
"Fire!" Axton yelled prompting a cacophony of weapons fire. Bad Maw start to look as if he was spazzing out with how many rounds were hitting him while the midgets were blasted off. After several seconds of continuous fire, everyone emptied their weapons. The midgets were nothing more than blood smears. Bad Maw was still standing, albeit barely.
"Ha, ha, ha. . . You think that will stop me-"
He was interrupted with a loud *THUNK!* as a buzz ax buried itself into his skull. The group turned to see a pissed looking Krieg had thrown it.
". . . Mommy. . . I got a headache." Bad Maw mumbled before falling over.
"That for trying to plant my spleen in the blood garden, damn barf toe!"
Everyone looked to Kai for a translation. ". . . I… I'm not repeating that… ever." He said as he walked over to Bad Maw's corpse and started searching it. The other Vault Hunters grabbed the loot that had spilled out, which included a rare Tediore shotgun which Maya claimed and several bars of eridium. After checking all of Bad Maw's pockets Kai checked his neck where he found a necklace with a large bullet on it and a key head welded onto the side of the casing.
"Is that the key?" Gaige asked.
"Only one way to find out." He said as he yanked the bullet off of the nomad's neck and tossed it over to Sal.. Native Pandoran man quickly slid the key in and gave the wheel a spin. Sure enough, the drawbridge lowered and opened the way for the Vault Hunters.
"Annnd, we're in business! So lock and load everyone, this is where shit gets real…" Axton said in a tough guy tone as he seemed to try and strike a pose.
Everyone just stared at Axton with blank expressions. "Okay, I think someone been watching to many war and action movies." Maya said, causing Axton's ego to deflate as everyone else laughed as they started across the bridge into the stronghold.
-Several "LARGE" firefights later-
The team had already dispatched around a hundred bandits in the stronghold and were still heading deeper in. "Well, those were some good warm-up fights." Salvador said as he stretched his arms.
"Seriously!? That was just a warm up to you!? I'm afraid to ask what you consider a workout." Gaige groaned. As they all exited a hallway they found it led out into a large circular cavern. Ice stuck out from a wall to the right, next to a ramp that spiraled upwards to a tiered second floor. In the center was a massive, swirling pool of water.
"What is this place?" Gaige asked.
"That's part of the dam's water intake system that feeds the electric turbines." Maya said, garnering a look from everyone.
"That's actually right… How did you know that?" Axton asked.
"When you live in a monastery all your life with the planets biggest library, you tend to learn a few random things." Maya replied as she looked around.
"Eh, I think I'd rather call it Satan's Sinkhole." Said Sal.
"Interesting name… How did you come up with it?" Kai asked curiously. Sal pointed to the wall by him where an old sign was hanging which read water intake room two. However, the words had been crossed out with red paint, and the words Satan's Sinkhole where painted below it.
"So then where do we go now?" Gaige asked.
"Looks like up there." Maya said pointing to the upper ring. "That would lead to the upper part of the dam."
"And straight into all the bandits." Sal said.
"Bandits? What bannnnn… Ooh, crapbaskets." Maya said as two dozen Bandits and Psychos took up position.
"WelP." Kai said popping the P. "Break's over." He pulled out a grenade and threw it at a bandit. It nailed the Bandit in the face mask and knocked him on his ass.
The Bandit sat up and rapidly shake his head of the dizziness. "Hey, there's something on your face man." Said a marauder.
"What? Like a spider? Get it off me!" The bandit yelled, swatting at his mask, only for the grenade to explode a second after, deploying six more micro-grenades which all exploded and killed or maimed about a dozen more Bloodshots.
"Move! We gotta get up the ramp before they dig in." Kai yelled as he pulled out his Fast Talker and began rushing towards the concrete ramp.
The group paused for a second until Sal pulled out his Dog shotgun and a Maliwan fire SMG, "Wait for me hombre!"
"WAIT! I WANT A NEW MEAT BICYCLE TOO!" Krieg yelled as he chased after them waving a Hyperion incendiary SMG.
As the three Vault Hunter engaged the horde of bandits Gaige let out a small sigh that Axton noticed. "What's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing. I'm just finally coming to the realization that this is my life now. Killing Psychopaths how want to eat me or wear my guts, going on extremely dangerous adventures with the high possibility of death, or worse getting hunted by a mega corporations. Oh, and that my best friend is so desensitized by it that he would just charge headlong into said danger. Along with most of my other friends." She said as she watched Krieg throw a Psycho into the air only for Sal to blast him like a clay pidgin.
"At least they're enthusiastic about it." Maya said as Kai summoned Hati who tackled a Brawler to the ground, while he spun around and stabbed a bandit in the neck with a Holo blade, pinning him to the wall, shoving his Fast Talker into the Bandit's gut as he did so and emptying the duel magazines.
Gaige and the others continued to watch the carnage for a few more seconds. "We're going to die on this planet, aren't we?" Gaige asked.
"Death lurks around us / just waiting to strike us / . . . So it very likely." Zer0 said as he watched Krieg throw his ax at a bandit on the upper level which lodged itself in his head. The dying bandit keeled over, accidentally grabbing onto one of his comrades. The wounded bandit dragged him and the one he had grabbed over the ledge, sending both screaming into the whirlpool.
"Did that one guy just Wilhelm scream?" Axton asked.
"I don't know what's stranger, the fact that was a perfect Wilhelm scream, or that you even know of it." Gaige said.
"HEY!" The four Vault Hunters looked across the room to see Kai and Krieg ducked behind a slab of concrete while Sal was firing at several psychos and bandits. "If you guys are done talking over there, we could really use a hand here." Kai yelled from across the room.
"Out of boom-booms!" Krieg yelled as he throws his last grenade.
"You heard them. Move it, ladies!" Axton yelled.
"HEY!" Gaige and Maya yelled in indignation as they ran after him as Zer0's hologram disappeared.
The three reached the others just as Sal had to end his gunzerking spree. "About time you lentas got here. I was afraid you had gotten lost."
"Shouldn't you be getting ammo? Short stack." Axton said.
"Shouldn't you be shooting, punta." Sal retorted
"Damn midget." Axton muttered as he shouldered his Dahl rifle and quickly shot a Psycho near the edge of the upper level dead.
"So what the plan now? We can't stay here." Maya said as she Phaselocked a Bandit behind them and shot it with a common Tediore pistol in the head.
"I say cause a distraction and then push forward." Axton said.
"At least until we get to the upper level. Looks like they reinforced several of the railings with some steel plates." Kai pointed out. "Speaking of which, anyone got a grenade they could toss?"
BOOM!*
They all looked up to see that a tesla grenade was going off and electrocuting the bandits nearby. Once the grenade used up its power, it left four bloodshots dead and three still standing but weak. Without giving them any time to recover, a sword burst out of a Psycho chest as Zer0 appeared behind him. Zer0 quickly rushed forward with the still impaled psycho and runs the sword through another bandit. With both impaled bloodshots Zer0 rammed them into a wall, before pulling out a Jakobs Wheelgun and rapidly putting two shots into the two other Bandits. He immediately turned invisible again as gunfire came from the opposite side.
Everyone just stared at where Zer0 last was till Kai spoke up. "Okay, seriously, where the fuck did you find this guy?!" Gaige just shrugged.
Axton just shook his head. "Later. Kai, Maya, take the front as we move. Gaige and-"
"SAVE SOME BLOOD BACON FOR ME!" Krieg yelled as he leapt over the cover and ran up the ramp to follow Zer0's trail of death.
"FOR THE LOVE OF! *Sigh* No respect for the chain of command."
"Wait? We had a chain of command?" Kai asked sarcastically.
"SCREW IT! Let just charge the bastards!" Sal said as he swapped to a Vladof TMP. "CARGAR~!" He yelled as he ran out.
"DAMMIT SAL! STOP CHARGING HEAD FIRST INTO EVERYTHING YOU IDIOT!" Axton yelled as he left leaving the three remaining Vault Hunters on the ramp.
"It's a wonder that we get anything done around here." Maya muttered, throwing her new acquired Tediore shotgun at a charging Psycho behind them causing him to explode.
"Welcome to the life of a Vault Hunter." Kai said as he swapped out his Fast Talker for the Clementine. He then pulled out a combat knife that looked like a modified K-Bar with a few switches on the grip, and quickly locked it onto the end of his rifle.
"A Bayonet, Really?" Gaige asked.
Kai pressed a switch near the hilt and the edge of the blade began to glow a bright red. "If it works." He said with a grin. "Now enough sitting around. Let move!" Kai yelled, jumping the cover and running up the ramp. Gaige and Maya followed him into the fight above.
Just as they reached the top of the ramp they saw Axton, pinned to a wall, parrying a buzz ax wielding Psycho with his Kai could level his rifle to help the man, a door to his right flew open and another Psycho rushed out at him, yelling, "KISS ME BABY ONE MORE TIME!"
"NO THANKS!" Kai yelled as he deflected the Psycho's ax with his left hologram blade, taking a quick slash at the Psycho, who stumbled out of the way. Before the psycho could attack again, Maya suddenly jumped and flipped over the two men, shooting the psycho in the head with a Maliwan pistol. Before the body could even hit the ground the siren landed on her feet, rushed forward to drive a siren charged punch into the side of the head of the Psycho Axton was dueling with. There was a gut-wrenching snap as his neck whipped to the side, sending the Bloodshot flying into an exposed pipe and crumple to the floor. . "Hey, guys look! I can participate in the puppet show now!" Axton proceeded to kick the psycho off the upper ring, across the platforms and off the edge towards the whirlpool. "BROADWAY HERE I COOOOOOME!" the limp Psycho yelled before hitting the water.
The Siren and Commando turned to see how their teenaged comrades were handling themselves. They both were holding a Psycho by the legs and dragging him to the edge and threw him off the side. "No! Let me stay meat puppet!" He screamed before being swallowed up by the water.
"WHAT ARE YOU IDIOTS DOING! You morons need to stop those slaggund's from springin' Roland! We lose him, we lose our payday!" Yelled Flanksteak over the intercom. Seconds later more Bloodshots started entering the room from various places.
"Things just got real. Gaige, Kai, watch our six. The rest of the gang will push around the side til we can secure the other side and cover you." Axton yelled.
"Got it." Kai answered as he immediately took out and deployed Hati's projector. He took a knee and shouldered his rifle and started shooting bandits across the way. Gaige deployed DT and took up cover behind a steel slab placed on the railing to cover Kai and the ramp which still had bandits rushing up.
The fighting continued for several minutes as Axton and the others slowly pushed forward. Gaige was firing away with her assault rifle and took down her twentieth Bloodshot on the ramp. DT was up to twenty-six kills. As Gaige unloaded another mag into a Marauder, the dam's intercom came on again. "You idiots still haven't killed those skaglicks. FINE! Send in the Mad Mike and the Ironbloods!" Flanksteak yelled.
"Who's Mad Mike and the Ironbloods? A fucking rock band?" Gaige asked as Kai thought about what they said.
"Oh shit, WE GOT COMPANY!" Kai yelled out as several doors burst open. From those doors boiled out dozens of armor-clad, buzz ax-wielding Psychos.
"Who are-"
"Armored Maniacs!" Kai yelled. Gaige immediately brought her rifle up and fired a burst at the nearest Maniac. Only instead of a splatter of blood and entrails, the rounds bounced off his heavy armor torso.
"They're bulletproof!?" Gaige yelled.
"To everything but corrosive damage and headshots." Kai informed the group as a buzz ax came flying between the two teens. "We need to move!" Kai said as he grabbed Gaige by the arm and led her towards the ring only for four more Maniacs to slide down a pole, cutting them off from the rest of the group, who were busy dealing with several Maniacs and a Badass Psycho. Kai clenched his teeth in frustration as he looked around for another option.
Gaige also looked around till she looked towards the other side of the room. "Kai, the bridge!" She said, pointing at the bridge that spanned the ring.
"Gaige that's insane!" Kai said before an approaching Maniac yelled: "I need a new femur bone for my meat bicycle!"
"Luckily, I just so happen to like insane ideas right now. HATI! Cover our six! DT, in front!"
With that DT took point as they moved towards the bridge, dodging the occasional thrown ax or bullet as they went. As they started making their way across Several Maniacs rushed Hati. He shot the first two with a Mjölnir shot, but as they were being electrocuted a third jumped over them and slashed Hati in the back. The digital wolf howled in shock. "Kai!" Gaige exclaimed.
Kai looked back to see Hati's body starting to decompose into shards of light. "Shit! Come on, we gotta get off this-" But he was cut off as an explosion erupted from a set of double doors. The teens looked to see a Nomad in a red and white coat walking out with a Torgue rocket launcher in hand. On both sides of his belt had two old railway lantern; curved steel pads adorned his shoulders, carried some kind cylinder on a pole on his back. His wore a skull-shaped mask with red lensed eyes and had a miners helmet on top.
"MAD MIKE IS IN THE HOUSE! AND I GOT ROCKETS FOR EVERYBODY!" He yelled, firing a rocket. Kai and Gaige both ducked down as the rocket flew over their heads and nailed an Armored Maniac in the chest, gibbing the unfortunate Bloodshot.. The Nomad fired another rocket towards the other Vault Hunters. It impacted near Sal, sending him flying into Zer0, knocking both Hunters over. Mad Mike just laughed hysterically as he continued to fire every which way
"SHIT! We're not gonna last long here Kai!" Gaige yelled. Kai looked back to see a Maniac charging.
DOWN!" Gaige ducked as Kai thrusted his rifle forward, impaling the Maniac in the neck with the bayonet. The heated blade set the Maniac on fire underneath his armor. In seconds the Maniac was burning, Panicking, the maniac stumbled trying to but out the fire, only to lose his footing and fall into the whirlpool below. Kai fired at several more Maniacs and Psychos trying to rush the bridge. Gaige fended off those rushing at them from the front with her SMG.
One Psycho got particularly ballsy and rushed at Gaige. She took aim and shot at the Psycho, but he suddenly jumped over Gaige and rushed at Kai. Without thinking Gaige turned and jumped at the crazed man, tackling the Psycho to the deck. "DAMN CAT! GET OFF MY WASHER!" The Psycho yelled, trying to throw the young Vault Hunter off. Gaige threw a punch with her robot arm into his back, getting a yelp out of the Psycho which alerted Kai, who turned and saw the scuffle. "GAIGE!" Kai yelled as he tried to move to help, only for the Psycho to yell, . "LET ROCK'N ROOOLL!" The Psycho rolled to the right, straight off the bridge, taking the redhead with him..
"NO!" Kai yelled, rushing to the edge. He looked over in a panic only to move back as DT floated up in front of him, Gaige cradled safely in his arms. "Holy shit you scared me!" Kai breathed, fighting off a heart attack..
"It'll take more than that to kill this badas-" An explosion cut her off engulfing DT's back, causing the death machine to begin to digitally collapse. With the Mechromancer still in his vanishing arms. "GAIGE!" The group yelled.
Kai reached out to to grab her, only to just barely brush her fingers as she slipped away from him. "GAAAAAIGE!" Kai yelled as he saw the girl fall into the whirlpool below… And disappear into the swirling pool. Kai stared at the spot he last saw her in shock for several seconds. To him, it felt as if the universe stopped. Not even a week had gone by and Kai just saw another friend disappear from his life in front of his eyes. In that moment he felt… Alone. Never had he felt a more cold, soul-crushing feeling in his life. Kai snapped out of his thoughts as he heard an irritating laugh ringing through the room.
"HA HA HA HA! That was so hilarious! I haven't had this much fun in weeks!" Mad Mike yelled. "Did you boys see her face? The little bitch was like, what the fuck! To bad though, I would have liked to make that bitch suffer a bit more, see her squirm in pain and agon-."
BANG! CHINK!*
Everyone was silent for several seconds, with the only sound being the water below as everyone seemed to suddenly be drawn to Mike. Mad Mike slowed brought his hand up to his helmet and realized the flashlight had been shot and destroyed. Everyone looked to the bridge where Kai was getting up with his rifle in hand. An angry, hollow look covered his face. Mike just started to laugh again, only this time there was just a hint of nervousness.
"AWWW, is the little boy angry his little friend is dead?" Mad Mike taunted.
Kai deployed Hati's sphere and gave a dark chuckle. "Angry, no. Livid with disgust and the sudden urge to cause blinding pain… Extremely." He said as Hati finished forming. "Hati… Activate Ragnarok." Hati began to growl as he started to grow in size letting out a demonic, blood-curdling howl that echoed through the dam.
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
Mini-Torgue Adventures
Episode 2
The Torgue-anought was sailing through space on its way to Pandora. Inside Torgue was banging his head as the space Echo radio was playing classic ancient rock, while his new captive/partner Billy the bullet was reading a galaxy map. "So if I'm reading this right, it will take us three weeks to get to Pandora… If there no detours."
Billy heard a loud growl. The bullet-shaped mascot turned and looked at Mr. Torgue, who had his hand on his stomach. "I'm hungry! We need to find a place to eat!" He said.
"Couldn't you just get something from the ship's galley, isn't is fully stocked?"
"F*K NO! We need to support the local economy! Plus, I'm craving a fresh burger!" He looked off to the side, out the window. "THERE!" He yelled.
Billy looked out the window and saw a Space billboard advertising a Space truck stop and rest stop three light years from them. "Really? A truck stop?"
"Come on Billy where's your sense of f*king adventure!? The exploration of food is just as much an adventure as a fight against a horde of Whiskered Kobos, or an unarmed brawl against an angry Badass Oxbat!... Plus we should refuel anyways."
Billy just stared at him for several seconds. "Are those even real creatures?"
"I DON'T F*KING KNOW!? NOW OFF TO ANOTHER ADVENTURE OF THE STOMACH!" Torgue yelled slams the ship's hyperdrive into gear and sent them shooting off into the void of space.
A little while later-
The Torgue-anought had landed on a station alongside dozens of other cargo ships and space trucks. After paying for fuel services they made their way to a diner-style restaurant called Gus's Galaxy Grill. They entered the restaurant and took two seats at the bar and looked over the menus until a blond waitress in a somewhat skimpy pink waitress outfit came by for their orders. "*POP* So what can I get you boys?" She asked as she popped the gum she was chewing on.
"I'll have the Grota-bull burger with extra fries... And a small diet soda." Mr. Torgue said as he set down the menu.
"I'll have the special." Billy said.
"Alright then, your orders will be ready in a few minutes." The waitress said blowing another bubble as she walked away. As they waited, a group of Dahl soldiers several seats down were laughing at some shared stories. "So Frank tells the General, 'That's not the robot you're looking for sir.' So the General asks, 'Well if it ain't the robot then what is it?!' And Frank says, 'Sir, that's my trash can!' " The man said, earning a laugh from everyone. As they were laughing one older man started to gasp, moving erratically as if he was having a seizure. The others quickly helped the guy up, clearing the bar top , sending glass and silverware flying all over the place.
"Bring this man some water!" One man yelled as he lifted the guy onto the bar.
"WATER MY ASS! BRING THIS MAN SOME GUT-HOLE-BISMOL!" Yelled another soldier.
Suddenly the man's gut started to bulge as he screamed in pain to the horror of the restaurant's patrons. Billy looked shocked and turned to the Waitress. "Hey, waiter! Waiter! What did that guy order!?"
"Oh, he had the special." She said in a bored manner.
"I ordered the special! Change my order to a burger!" Billy panicked.
Suddenly the man's gut burst open, as a small green alien creature with an elongated head crawled out of the man's stomach, hissing at everyone nearby. The man looked at the small creature with a look of horror. "Oh not again." He said before his eyes rolled into the back of his head. The creature jumped out of the man's gut causing several patrons to scream in panic, as it landed on the counter in front of everyone. Then out of nowhere, the small alien pulled out a small top hat and cane as music suddenly started to inexplicably playing from nowhere.
"Hello my baby
Hello my honey
Hello my ragtime gal"
"Send me a kiss by wire
Baby my heart's on fire"
The alien sang as it danced past Mr. Torgue and Billy who watched it in shock, disgust, and confusion.
"If you refuse me
Honey you loose me
Then you'll be
Left alone~.
Oh baby telephone
And tell me I'm
Your own~."
With that the alien ran through a small door at the end of the bar top. Torgue and Billy both stood up and raised their right hand up together. "Check please!"
They were gone a few minutes later and were quickly ran back to the Torgue-anought. "Once the truck is fueled up were getting the hell out of here." Billy said.
"But what about my burger?" Torgue asked.
"There a MacSpacey's five light-years from here. I'll buy you a big MacSpace burger." Billy said.
"Deal… We might want to hurry by the way."
"Why?" Billy asked only for the diner to explode a second later in a massive fireball. "TORGUE WHAT DID YOU DO!?" Billy yelled as they both started running for the ship.
"It wasn't me! These old L-class space stations are notorious for being over f*cking sensitive with their Biocontainment systems." Another section of the station suddenly exploded, taking out several ships on the flight deck. "Luckily it's a little slow though." Torgue said as they got to the Torgue-anought and quickly jumped in. As soon as Mr. Torgue got to the pilot's seat he fired up the ship engines as more of the space stop started to explode. Billy looked out the window to see dozens of other ships also quickly taking off from the deck in a bid to escape. "HANG ON TO YOUR SHELL CASING!" Torgue yelled as Billy strapped in. Torgue hit the accelerator and the Torgue-anought lurched up off the platform and shot into space.
Billy turned and looked back to see more explosions ripping through the space stop until it suddenly turned into a small sun that nearly blinded him.
". . . Well that was f*cking fun... You said something about a MacSpacey nearby?" Torgue said with a carefree tone.
Thirty minutes later they were parked outside a MacSpacey's that was floating in the void of space, where they were finally eating their lunch.
After a few minutes of silence, Billy finally turned to Mr. Torgue. "Soooo, should I just start to expect things to randomly explode around you for now on?"
"Basically, yes. Sh*t has always been exploding around me, ever since I built my first explosive weapon all those years ago." Mr. Torgue, a wistful look on his face as he took another bite of his burger.
". . . Should I be worried?" Billy asked.
"About exploding? F*ck no! Stay close to me and you'll be fine!" Mr. Torgue said.
"I was afraid you'd say that." Said the cartoon bullet as he contemplated his actual chances of survival.
X-X-X
-Link Re-establish
(Gaige) KILO! WHAT THE HELL! YOU JUST KILLED ME OFF LIKE A GAME OF THRONE'S CHARACTER!
(Kilo8) Gaige, just relax!
(Gaige) DON'T TELL ME TO RELAX!
(Tina) Girl. Girl. Girrrrrl. Look, has Kilo ever steered us wrong in this story?
(Gaige) Well… He... no. There was the time… No.
(Tina) So it would stand that Kilo has a plan for the next chapter.
(Kilo8) Of course I do!
(Tina) Plus if he does really kill you off, we'll just have to deal with him.
(Kilo8) Umm…. How will you deal with me?
(Tina) I'll leave that to madam Cyborg.
Gaige just held up her robot arm and punched a dead robot in the chest, leaving an imprint of her fist in the metal.
(Kilo8) Uh, ha ha hm… Uhhh, Mr. Torgue, how did you like your little story?
(Torgue) THAT WAS F*CKING AWESOME! But now I'm hungry for a good burger.
(Kilo8) You're not having a burger, we have a nice Mercenary Day dinner feast at Moxxi's later with the others. Do you want a repeat what happened on last Feast Day?
(Torgue) . . . FIIIIIINE.
(Kilo8) Well, I hope all you readers enjoyed this little holiday gift. As a bonus, I have a little game/challenge. As of now every chapter I'll try and toss one or more Easter egg references in the chapter. For this chapter, there are three.
(Gaige) This sounds fun. I can already guess one.
(Kilo8) Well, of course, that one is fairly hard to miss. Just to note though these references could be as big an entire scene or a single sentence, heck, even a single swear word, but they all either refer to another game, movie, T.V. show, comic book, anime or even a few popular abridged series and web series. The first person to guess all three will get a shout out in the next chapter or, if you find it soon enough, maybe a small cameo in the story, but only if you identify all three correctly and are the first one to post the correct answers. The answers will be presented in the next chapter as well along with the winner. The only other rule… Well, it's not really a rule, it just that "Redemption's Avenger" has been disqualified from this round of the hunt. Sorry man but you've already seen the list when you did the Beta Reading… Most of it. By the way, I'd like to thank "Redemption's Avenger" for the help getting this chapter ready and for the improvements in a select few places.
(Torgue) The guy does AWESOME work.
(Kilo8) Well, that wraps up this chapter, again I hope you've all enjoyed this little Mercenary Day present. Please remember to like and/or follow so that you can keep up with any updates. And please remember to leave a comment for the poll votes. Now if you'll excuse us, we have to go get ready for a party. Oh, and once again, Happy Holidays to all, and I hope you all enjoy a wonderful time with whoever you plan to spend it with. If not… Well, I hope this chapter at least brightens your day a bit.
(Tina) Also HAPPY NEW YEARS!
(Gaige/Torgue) HAPPY NEW YEARS!
(Kilo8) Ha, ha. Well, later Vault Hunters. Tina! Hit the button!
*BZZZT!*
-ECHO Review Log Terminated-