-TRANSMISSION ONLINE-
-Beginning ECHO Review Log-
The gang was sitting in the Mystery Science theater… All looking as if they haven't slept in ages.
(Kilo8) . . . Oh, hey everyone. We're all beat tired so I will make this short and save the news and explanations till the end.
(Gaige) Just start the chapter before she wakes up.
(Tina) I need a distraction!
(Kilo8) Right, remember to read the end log after the chapter, with that please enjoy the show.
-ECHO Transmission interrupted-
X-X-X
Disclaimer: I do not own Borderlands or any of its characters, Borderlands is owned by Gearbox Software and 2K Games, the only ownership I claim is of my own OC's. This is a story just for your fun and enjoyment. Please enjoy.
Stories text formats
"Talking"
'Thinking'
"Echo/Radio"
'Krieg's inner voice'
X-X-X
Chapter Beta Read by "Redemption's Avenger and alexyo3"
X-X-X
Chapter 14
Old Friends...
It was a quiet morning in Sanctuary as the glow of the sun was still behind the horizon. The only ones awake in the town were a pair of crimson raider guards in maroon and orange armor standing at the center of town by the sanctuary monument.
The maroon armored Raider turned to the other, "Hey?"
"Yeah?" The orange Raider replied in an almost bored tone.
"You ever wonder why we're here?"
"It's one of life's great mysteries, isn't it. Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of... some cosmic coincidence or, is there really a God... watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know man, but it keeps me up at night."
They were both quiet for several seconds as the maroon guard stared at the orange one. "What? I mean why are we out here, freezing our asses off in this damn town, on this damn death trap of a planet?"
"Oh, uh... yeah."
"What was all that stuff about God?"
"Uh... hm? Nothing." The orange Raider quickly replied, looking away.
The maroon guard tilted his head in slight interest. "You wanna talk about it?"
"No."
"You sure?'
"Yeah."
"Seriously though, why are we out here? Far as I can tell, Pandora is just a shit ass planet that does nothing but tries to find new and creative ways to kill us every day, whether it be by extreme weather, rabid animals, crazed and murderous psychopaths, or evil CEOs who keep firing robots down on us from his fucking H shaped space station."
"Mhm."
"And the only reason that we're here is because Hyperion has warrants out on all former Crimson Lance soldiers who served on Pandora during the fall of Atlas."
"Yeah, that's because Handsome Jack is a fucking asshole who likes to rub his 'superiority' into everyone's faces… I mean, kill us already why don't ya."
"Yeah sure, but I mean, even if he were to kill us all right now, what would change? Nothing! It would just be another fucking planet in the middle of fucking nowhere space. Whoop de fucking do!"
"What's up with that anyway? I mean, I signed on to fight some Vault aliens. Next thing I know I'm on this dirtball and some Vault Hunters blow up General Knoxx and the armory leaving me stuck in the middle of nowhere, fighting a bunch of damn robots and psychos and working for said Vault Hunters who killed the General."
"Well, it could be worse. We could still be fighting the Blues in that box canyon in the middle of nowhere." Shrugged the maroon one.
Just then an object landed between the two guards. They both curiously looked down at it to find themselves looking at a silver grenade with the word Vladof painted on the side in big red letters.
"Aww, son of a bitch." The orange one muttered as the grenade burst open and deployed a tesla coil which started shocking the two Raiders. After about four seconds the Tesla exploded, leaving behind a pair of now crispy, but still, breathing Raider guards. A second later they both fell over in pain.
Up in one of the nearby towers Kai could be seen leaning out a window. "Now shut the hell up! People are trying to sleep for god sakes!" Kai yelled, before slamming the window shut.
"Simmons, I fucking hate you."
*Cough, cough* "The feeling is mutual Griff."
Back in Kai's room, the teen attempted to go back to sleep, but after almost thirty minutes of tossing and turning, he finally gave up. With a sigh of defeat, the teenager slowly dragged himself out of bed and went downstairs. When he got to the kitchen he immediately started making a pot of coffee, more out of habit than need since Reiss's passing. After a few minutes of waiting Kai finally got his cup of coffee and made his way to the sofa where he plopped down and turned on the TV.
Fifteen minutes later Kai was still watching TV, casually surfing what channels Sanctuary could pick up.
*Click*
I'm Mr. Torgue and I got a question for you! Are you tired of being f*cking too tired to do anything F*CKING AWESOME! Well then grab a can of BOOM! One swig of this sh*t and "BOOM" YOU'RE READY TO GO F*CKING CRAZY! BOOM has been scientifically created with our patented secret formula that-
*Click*
"Welcome back to another thrilling episode of the galaxy's favorite reality talent show, Fame or Shame! And here your host Lazlow Jon-
*Click*
"Oceanic Starliner flight 815 is now on its third day of having been reported lost. The ship was last seen entering the South Pacific Nebula. There were an estimated three thousand two hundred and eighty passengers on board including the hit boy band Synced-Up. Support from fans of the lost band can be seen in front of the band's record label, Sellout Records." A female newscaster said as the image switched to one showing a mob of crying teenage fangirls dressed in Synced-Up tee shirts holding up crappy posters saying things such as, "no Synced-Up equals Doomsday", "I can't live without you Todd", or, most disturbing, "bring our boy toys home".
Kai just shook his head. "How can someone ever fall in love with what is obviously a set of corporate fabricated asshats is beyond me." Then he heard the click-clack of something with clawed feet he looked over to the stairs in time to see Hati slowly walk down and let out a long yawn. "Well look who finally decided to wake up from his beauty sleep mode."
Hati gave a small grumble as he walked over to the sofa. "Right back at you."
At that point, Hati gave a small questioning bark. "Well, it has been just over a week man." Hati just stared at him in confusion and barked again. "No, no. It was the last update, I looked at the system a few days ago, we got an extra four minutes of power usage while Ragnarok is active but it made the power recovery nearly eighty percent more inefficient. On top of that, it damaged your battery, which I swapped out already. So we will need to think of something else to deal with the power drain."
The wolf just groaned in displeasure as he slumped to the ground in front of the TV, groaning all the while. "That's good news at least, we did save Roland, but not before we had to deal with Hyperion." Hati cocked an eyebrow and grunted. "Right, well after you shutdown -"
-FIVE MINUTES LATER-
"Annnnd that's basically what happened." Kai finished before taking another sip of his coffee.
*Woof*
"Yeah leave it to Jack to fucking ruin things, even-" He stopped as they both heard movement from upstairs, after about two minutes of shuffling, a flush of the toilet could be heard. Some more shuffling later the perpetrator finally revealed themselves as a small red-headed sleepy zombie tiredly walked down the stairs. "Gaige?" Kai asked, but the girl didn't seem to hear him as she made her slow march to the coffee maker.
As she made her cup of coffee Kai took note of her current attire which basically consists of a single faded purple tee shirt that was two sizes too large with a red anarchy logo spray-painted on it. The collar of the shirt appeared to have been stretched as he could see part of her bare shoulders as well as just a little bit of her red bra peeking out of the shirt's stretched collar. Her hair was currently down in a completely disheveled mess that reached her shoulders. Kai also noticed that while the shirt came down to her mid-thighs, she wasn't wearing any pants or anything else as far as he could tell, but tried not to speculate. The only other article of clothing she had was a pair of black and white striped ankle-high socks on her feet, with her right big toe sticking out of a hole.
The biggest thing that drew his attention though was on her left shoulder. Until now he had never known the actual degree of Gaige cybernetic enhancements. Her mechanized arm extended into her shoulder which had a high-grade titanium collar implant that connected to the arm by a ball joint, which looked much newer and far more professional, compared to the rest of the robot arm.
As Gaige continued to make her morning elixir Hati shot Kai a questioning 'what did you do' look. Kai shot him back a 'no, I did nothing of the sort' look followed by a 'I don't know' shrug.
Gaige finally finished making her coffee and took her first big sip, letting out a sigh of content as the life-sustaining brew swept through her, which seemed to quickly reverse any of her previous zombie-like behavior. With her mind now finally booting up she set down her coffee, looked around a little, and realized that she wasn't in the Raider HQ. Before she could think about where she was she turned and saw Kai and Hati staring at her. "What are you two doing here?"
"Better question, what are you doing in my apartment?" Kai retorted.
It took a second for Kai's question to sink in, but when it did her face glowed red in embarrassment. A thought then occurred to her which made her look down and realize what she was wearing, which seemed to only further the glow of embarrassment. "Umm, good morning." She said weakly.
"Morning. Now I'll ask again, why are you in my apartment, and for that matter, how did you even get in here? you don't have a key."
"I uhhh…. hacked the lock."
"Gaige I have an electronic biometric lock and a keyed deadbolt. I know you can hack the electronic lock, but not a deadbolt."
"You can if you have a robotic arm."
Kai and Hati looked at each other and then leaned over to look at the front door where they noticed that the deadbolt appeared to have been punched out.
As the boys both looked, Gaige took her own note of Kai's own attire… And was surprised. His current outfit was nowhere near as interesting as his normal day-to-day gear, consisting of an old blue Dahl t-shirt and some black cotton sweatpants. But what she really focused on were his arms, specifically his muscles. While biology was never a subject of interest for the young techno genius, she knew more than the basics, after all, she built herself a new arm. While Kai wasn't jacked like Sal or hard built like Axton, Gaige could tell that Kai was more than fit.
'Those muscles in his arms seemed to be tightly packed, as if from years of hard work... which would make sense since he had mentioned being the apprentice to a master weaponsmith and was trained by an ex-Valdof commando, both of which would require a high amount of physical fitness.' Her thoughts then drifted to the evening on Ellie's roof where she had lent against Kai's shoulder. 'It was hard but so comfy. I wonder if the rest of his body is as tight asssssoooOOO MY MURPHY!' Gaige's mind screamed as her face grew beet red.
'Dammit girl, get your head on straight, Kai is your friend, not some hunky piece of meat to ogle… Although hunky wouldn't seem like the best word for him. Hot? No. Handsome? Fuck no, that term is tainted by the Handsome Jackass himself... Cute?... Maaaaybe…. AAAAGH DAMMIT YOU STUPID BRAIN, STOP OOGLING MY FRIEND!' Her thoughts roared.
"I stand corrected. . . I knew we should have gotten that door reinforced." Kai muttered, snapping Gaige out of her less than pure thoughts. "Knowing that I'm still waiting to hear why you are here?"
"Well you see, Tannis has been bothering me to let her have access to my arm so that she can see how DT works." Gaige said hesitantly.
"Right, I should have warned you about that, she tried to do the same thing with Hati here when I was staying at the HQ." He said as he pointed said wolf.
"Hati?" Gaige asked as she looked down and saw said wolf laying down. "Hati, good to see you awake boy." She said as she bent down and scratched his ears. An act that to Kai's sudden surprise gave him a clear view down her shirt. '... Are those hearts on crossbones?' Kai thought as his cheeks heated up. But before he could even think of what to do with this sudden situation Hati let out a yelp of pain as Gaige pinched both of his ears. "And don't you dare think you got away scot-free after shutting down back at the dam!"
Hati looked over to Kai for help only to see him sipping his coffee. "Don't look at me man, I already got my ass chewed out, it's your turn to face the music…*slurp*... So what are you going to do to him?"
Gaige let go of the light-wolf who sulked back to the floor and covered his ears with his paws. Grabbing her coffee mug, she sat down on the sofa next to Kai. "I'll think of something, maybe model him in one of those stupid costumes that pet owners make their pets wear." That earned another whine from Hati. "Anyway, back on topic. Tanis has been getting more… Ambitious with her attempts to get access to my arm and DT.
"What do you-"
"Last night I woke up at one in the morning to find her in my room attempting to disconnect my arm!"
Kai just stared at the anarchist for several seconds. "Well, that's new… and disturbing."
"You're telling me. I mean, seriously, how does anyone put up with her."
"Simple, you don't." Kai said which earned a groan from his fellow teen as she plopped back into the sofa. She stared at the TV for about a minute after that.
"Hey, how are you getting a Gularious news channel on this side of the Galaxy?"
"Are you familiar with the planet Tropico?"
Gaige nodded. "Yeah, who isn't, the whole planet is just one big beach resort for the rich and famous."
"Yeah, it's about fifty light-years from us, however, because it's surrounded by several dense nebulae and a pulsar cluster it makes transmissions to and from the planet difficult. So Tropico built a signal receiver/booster on Pandora to cut through the interference. Now usually any kind of construction is met with hostility from the local bandit clans, so after several large fights, assassinations, and an arm-wrestling contest, a deal was struck. The people of Pandora leave the transmitter alone, and everyone, Raiders, Rats, Bandits, and whoever or whatever else that lives on the planet gets access to all fifty-five thousand ECHO channels, for free... Paid-per-view and streaming all included as well."
Gaige just stared at him as she let that sink in. "Soooo, you can get every season of Villains?
"Yup."
"Super Ultra Hypersonic Mega Dimensional Robot Wars 1 through 20?"
"Mhum"
"Even the XBO series Game of Blood!" She asked with hopeful anticipation.
"Two words, Blue Wedding."
Gaige squealed in excitement. "I've been dying to watch it!"
"Well, technically we don't have any jobs today, so I don't see why we can't-" He was suddenly interrupted as his ECHO went off. Kai gave a sigh of defeat, muttering "broke my own damn rule" as he pulled out his ECHO and answered it. "Kai here."
"Kai, it Roland. I need you at HQ ASAP for a long haul mission I need you to do. Also, you should take one of the Vault Hunters with you for backup."
"Right, I'll go get ready now. Kai out." He gave a tired sigh as he leaned back into the sofa for a moment. Finally, he looked over to find a dejected-looking Gaige. "Rain check on that marathon?"
"Sure, why not. Just let me get something to eat before we go." She said as she got up.
"Wait, what do you mean by we?"
"Well, Roland did say to bring a Vault Hunter with you, and since I am here and since I am your friend then it would stand to reason that you were gonna ask me anyways. Besides, everyone else is busy with other overnight jobs, remember." She reminded him as she walked over to the fridge.
". . . Yeah, you got me there." He said as Gaige opened the fridge, only to have a cloud of green mist burst into her face.
"Oh, God that reeks! When was the last time you've cleaned this…" Gaige abruptly slammed the fridge shut and pinned the door closed with her back. Kai and Hati looked at her in confusion.
"What's the matter?"
"There's something alive in there!" She said with a hint of fear in her voice. "And it had tentacles!"
"Gaige, there no way something is living inside of my-"
The fridge shook violently, causing Gaige to immediately back away. Kai grabbed a Maliwan fire pistol off the coffee table and had it aimed at the refrigerator with Hati up and ready to attack. "Okay, I stand corrected. . . Let's just go grab some breakfast burritos from Moxxi's and just get out of here." Kai said as he moved towards the stairs, keeping his gun trained on the fridge.
"You're not going to deal with this?!"
"Shits already weird enough as it is this morning." Kai said as he walked up the stairs. "I don't want another item on the list right now."
X-X-X
Kai was not happy. He was irritated, because of the commando sitting in the turret of the Technical that they were riding in. Gaige was sulking in the back since Axton pulled seniority and took the turret seat. At the last minute, Axton showed up and decided to give them "backup" since he had nothing to do and all the other Vault Hunters were either running missions or on errands for different people. In actuality Axton had been acting like this since an incident several days before when he found Kai and Gaige in an embarrassing, but highly accidental situation. And although he doesn't outwardly show it most of the time, Axton has been acting like an overbearing and overprotective big brother. Which was why Gaige was now in the back of the truck away from Kai.
Gaige leaned up over the cab behind Kai. "Sooo, what exactly is this mission we have out there?"
"Don't know, it depends on what they need once we get there. All I do know is that the officer at the Raider base we're heading for asked for some assistance for a few upcoming missions. But while we're there Roland asked me to inspect operations there as the reports we've been getting lately are a little… Weird."
"Here another question. Why can't we just fast travel there?" Axton asked in an annoyed tone.
Kai was silent for a moment. "A few Psychos broke the fast travel station thereafter they tried to use it as a… How do I phrase this... a glorified sex toy."
"NOOOPE! Just stop talking, I don't even want to think about that!" Axton yelled clamping his ears shut.
"But anyways the officer there also said he has a few new members that have shown great potential and could be more useful at Sanctuary. So Roland wants me to act as an observer for their next mission, if they're as good as their CO says will be taking them with us."
"Sooo, this is also a recruitment mission?" Gaige asked.
"It could be, will have to see. Get ready, we're almost there."
"I don't see a town." Axton said looking around the hills.
"You will soon." Kai replied as he drove into a large cave. After several twists and turns, the tunnel opened up to a massive cavern.
"WOAH!" Axton and Gaige both breathed out as they laid their eyes on an incredible sight. The cavern was at least three or four kilometers wide with a lake in the middle of it. Surrounding the lake were hundreds of buildings and homes, all made in the typical Pandoran Bandit and Dahl utility-style setup on them creeping up the walls and cliffs of the cavern. There were dozens of twisting bridges and ramps of various lengths and heights, and in the distance, they could see a tower with a large bullet on top. As they rode on they passed an old shot up sign that read Welcome to Hollow Point.
~Five minutes later
"This place is AWESOME!" Gaige yelled as they walked through the town.
"Not really. You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy." Kai said.
"Did you really just quote Star Wars?" Gaige asked.
"Yes I did, but it is true. Just look around, everyone is armed whether you can see it or not. There's drug dealers on every corner, bandits and even a few Psychos are running around freely, and then there the occasional dead body on the ground." Kai said as he stepped over a fresh corpse causing both Gaige and Axton to grimace a little.
"And of course nearly everyone is a crook of some kind here, just waiting for the chance to relieve you of any valuables they can get." Kai said as a dark-skinned young woman with braided hair bumped into Gaige as they passed each other.
"Oops, sorry about that kid." The woman said as she tried to walk off with her friend.
Kai whipped around and had a Vladof Righteous Troublemaker pistol out and pointed at the backs of the two women. "Hold it ladies." Kai called out, his voice cold and serious, causing the woman to freeze as they slowly turned to him.
"What, I said I was sorry." The woman who bumped Gaige said.
"Give it back." He said sternly.
"What are you talking about?"
"I said give it back or else you're gonna have a new piercing through your brain." Kai threatened, raising his gun half an inch. The woman sighed and slowly put her hand in her bag and slowly pulled out Gaige's Rogue Smuggler, much to her and Axton's surprise, then the woman held it out to Kai who took it. "Now beat it."
"Come on Sasha." The other woman said, running off.
"As I said a hive of scum and villainy." Kai said as he holstered his gun and turned back. He gave the Rogue a quick check before tossing it back to Gaige who caught it and held it as if someone returned a mother's baby. "Watch your pockets, pickpocketing here is as second nature as breathing."
"So what was this place?" Axton asked.
"It used to be a Dahl mining and processing center, the largest one only beaten by Sanctuary's efficiency. There are hundreds of tunnels throughout this mountain where all kinds of minerals were mined. Now it's just another bandit town, the only difference is that Hyperion can't attack here with moonshots since it's underground." Kai looked down a side street as they were passing only for him to stop. "Oh for crying out loud!" He yelled, following the path.
The street was sealed off with old Dahl police tape that surrounded a crime scene. There were dozens of mutilated bandit bodies all over the place, with blood spatter painting the street, not to mention the bullet holes. All of the walls were covered in them and in some cases there were outlines of where someone had been standing. Some buildings were missing walls. you couldn't even walk two steps without stepping on a shell casing. "What the hell happened here?" Axton asked.
"He happened." Kai pointed to the opposite building which had a lot fewer bullet holes. It did, however, have the words 'Thanks for all the blood and sips. The Crimson Fucker! Follow on ECHO at hashtag thecrimsonfucker!' painted in blood on the side.
"That's…. A little, ugh." Gaige tried to speak, disgust welling up from within her.
"Presumptuous, arrogant, the straight-up definition of an asshole, yes to all of the above."
"So who is this guy?" Axton asked.
"Some Ozzy Osbourne looking motherfucker with this police girl sidekick who came through Sanctuary about three months ago. Said he was here on vacation. He keeps doing shit like this, a few weeks before you came he ate a whole bandit camp."
"Wait, as in-"
"It's better you and Gaige don't know." Kai cut Axton off. He turned to keep moving when he froze. "What the!? How the fuck are you alive!?"
Gaige and Axton both turned to find a red mohawked midget with a gold psycho mask on, and armed with a pair of bladed bandit pistols. Flanking him were eight badass marauders with red painted shoulder armor with a gold skag on the left one.
"YOU! You're that bastard who killed me and my old crew and best buddy Mong-da! Well now I have you right where I want you Kai the Rebel, for now, I, the leader of the Golden Skags have for months now been-" The midget began to drone on as Kai rolled his eyes.
"Not this again."
"Wait, you know this midget?" Axton asked.
"And what was that about killing him?" Gaige asked.
"He's one of the smarter Midgets out there, but only by a few brain cells, I killed him and most of his crew on the third day got to this planet. I actually met and saved Reiss from them in that fight. But as to how he's alive I don't know… It does make Sal's theory that the bandits have their own New-U system sound all the more plausible though." Kai answered as he pulled out his pistol and clicked the safety.
"And so once again I Blood Rage the Mighty, shell have his vengeance upon you for all of your crimes!"
"Yeeeeah, I think you'll need to wait in line for that pipsqueak." Came a heavily modulated voice. Everyone looked to see a black armored Hyperion Hawk trooper holding a Maliwan slag SMG in his right hand while his left was holding a yellow Hyperion body bag on his back.
"Zager? . . . Okay is this a fucking intervention or something with everyone I've ever pissed off, because I don't see the Handsome Jackass anywhere?" Kai asked as he looked around.
"Ha, you wish this was an intervention. This must be my lucky day. Had a decent shower today, a breakfast with real bacon, and a clean and quick bounty, that was a perfect day in my book. But to find you, that lucky's, and if I recall I've also seen a bounty poster for GI Joe there and your little girlfriend. She's got one hell of a bounty on her."
"Why does everyone assume I'm his girlfriend?" Gaige muttered quietly as Kai groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Look, Zager, if I recall, your beef is with Mordecai, not me. So let's just nod and go our separate ways while I get back to dealing with the Trojan Mini-Me over there."
"What did you call me!?" Blood Rage shouted only to be ignored.
"Sorry, but after what your wolf did to my armor, making me lose Bloodwing and my chance to finally kill Mordecai, I'm gonna rip your head off and mount it on my ship's bulkhead." Zager said as he dropped the body bag and raised his SMG. "Now, drop the gun and hands up. All of you."
Kai sighed as he dropped his gun and raised his hands up. "You shouldn't have done that." He said as Gaige and Axton also put their hands up.
"And way that?"
"DT."
". . D. T?" Zager parroted, tilting his head in confusion.
"DT ATTACK MODE ALPHA!" Gaige yelled, causing DT to digistruct from her hand in front of them, surprising Zager and Blood Rage.
"THE FUCK!?" Zager yelled as he dumped his SMG's mag into DT's armor to no real effect. Kai used the distraction to duck and roll behind DT for cover while tossing out Hati's Photon sphere, while Axton threw out his Sabre turret which immediately started to pin down several of the Marauders. With all of their deployable gear now active the Vault Hunters went on the attack. DT charged at Zager who quickly jumped back to dodge his claws, causing sparks to fly as they nicked his shield.
Blood Rage started screaming, running straight at Kai, swinging his bladed pistols like a mini hedge trimmer. Kai just pulled his Clementine out by the barrel and swung it like a baseball bat. Blood Rage was hit in the face with the stock of the rifle with a resounding *PANG* and was sent flying over his men's heads. "BOSS! THEY HIT THE BOSSMAN, GET THEM!" yelled the lead Marauder as the others spread out and started shooting.
Three Marauders charged at Axton, guns blazing as he dropped to one knee and fired at the first one with his Dahl Carbine, putting two bursts through the lead Marauder's head-turning his head into a burst of blood and meat. Without missing a beat he took several shots at the second, three in the head, three in the chest, dropping him. The last one was within lunging distance of him and had a bayonet on his bandit gun. In too close, Axton dropped his rifle and pulled his tomahawk out, immediately sidestepping the lunging bandit. Just as the Marauder was passing Axton smashed the back spike of the tomahawk into the Marauder's hip, while dragging him forward. He brought the weapon back up and bashed the Marauder in the back of the head with the butt of the handle, dazing the wounded man and cracking the helmet. Spinning the tomahawk head around, Axton hooked it around the Marauder's neck and pulled, whipping him around and sending him to his knees, before bringing the tomahawk blade down on the Marauder's neck which cut and dug into the man's spine, stopping just short of decapitating him. "Why would you charge when you have a machine gun, you idiot?" Axton asked the dead man as he picked up his own rifle. At the same moment, a notification window opened on his HUD labeled Axe Man. "A hundred badass points for that? Sweet!"
Gaige and Kai were fighting off their own group of Marauders. "Get ready Gaige."
"Don't worry, I got this."
"What do you-"
"I said I got this." Gaige said as she brought her Ol' Painful up and started firing a hail of red lasers at the Marauders. Gaige focused her aim on the first one, who quickly was perforated with dozens of smoking wounds. Several of the laser shots missed only to bounce off one of the nearby building and all hit a different target. The one Marauder was hit in the back of his head, blowing a baseball size hole in the back of his head. The next turned when the first died and was met with a laser to the heart. The last one was hit with several bolts across his back causing him to quickly go up in flames, he danced around screaming in pain for several second until he fell over dead. "See, I told you I goooo-oh… oops." Gaige had turned around to see Kai standing there with an dry look as a small lock of hair on the left of his head was smoking, and a blast mark could be seen in the wall behind him.
"I think your Close Enough skill still needs some work." Kai said as he pinched the smoldering hairs with his right hand.
Hati just gave a muffled bark near Kai which he turned to and noticed a Marauder head in his jaw. "Agreed… Where did you find the extra Marauder?" Hati just gave another muffled bark that sounded like a "wouldn't you like to know" response.
At that same moment, there was a loud *BOOOOSH* as DT was pierced by a green laser causing him to despawn. They turned to see Zager with a Hyperion Railgun with an ominously glowing green muzzle. "Okay, now I'm pissed. I'm going to rip you two bastards limb from limb, and then I'm going to grind up little miss robots' faces till she looks like she came out of a meat grinder."
"Wow, really channeling your inner bandit there aren't you." Kai commented.
"FUCK OFF! And just for that comment, I'm going to mount your skull on the nose of my ship instead of the bulkhead!"
"NOOOO!" Came a shrill scream. They turned to see Blood Rage, whose hair was now a mess and had a new large dent on the left cheek from where Kai had batted him. "His skull is mine! MIIIINE! And it will adorn the top of my blood throne for all to see…. Or I'll use it as a codpiece."
"Eww." Gaige said with disgust.
"Yeah, I agree with the cyborg, nobody is gonna have my skull. Besides even if you two did team up, you're still outnumbered."
"On the opposite Vault losers!" Blood Rage yelled.
"I think you mean on the contrary shorty." Kai replied.
"SHUT UP!" With that Blood Rage gave a loud whistle. For the first few seconds, nothing happened, then the sounds of excited bandits reached their ears. Psychos, bandits, Marauders and a few Goliaths flooded the streets, basically surrounding the Vault Hunters. Each one was brandishing their own weapons and all had something with the Golden Skag logo on them. For some, it was tattooed on them.
"Okay, for a Psycho midget that's actually quite impressive." Zager said appreciatively.
Gaige, Kai, Axton, and Hati got ready to fight. "So what now?" Gaige asked.
"Well, you two could probably die and end up back at that sheriff station we parked at all fine. My ass, however…" Gaige and Axton didn't need any more explanation as they remembered that he couldn't use the New-U system. They backed up until their backs were to the wall as the army started to creep in.
"Kai, here's the plan. Have Hati prepare his Ragnarok, once ready you're going to ride him out of here while me and Red cover you."
"Good plan Axton, there's just one problem." Kai whispered.
"What?"
"I disabled the Ragnarok system in order to try and fix it."
Axton winced, glancing at the approaching army. "Okay, what about riding DT up to the rooftop?"
"DT can't fly that high with the extra weight." Gaige said, unable to hide her sudden fear, not at the enemies in front of them, but at the thought of losing her best friend.
"Then it looks like we have no choice." Kai muttered, taking aim with his Clementine. "We're just going to have to fight our way out, and hope for a damn miracle.
Just as Blood Rage was about to signal his crew to attack, a explosive barrel fell into the group behind him, killing several bandits and injuring a dozen more.
"WHAT!" Blood Rage yells as everyone looks to the roof where the barrel came from to see a large young man in the process of pulling another barrel from his back and throwing it into the group of bandits. The barrel exploded, launching several psychos and bandits high into the air. One psycho was blown so high in the air that he flew to the next street over and landed on an old man's cabbage cart.
"MY CABBAGES!"
Back in the fight, the large man jumped from the roof and charged headlong into a group of bandits, throwing punches, drawing them into a massive slugfest.
At the same time, someone shot past the group on their left, leaving a wake of ice that froze several bandits, shouting "COOOOOOOOL!" The blur sped through the bandits, continuing to either kill them or freeze them as the blur continued to race around.
On the left, a young girl hopped down and pulled out a pink cheer baton that glowed pink at the top. A pink cartoonish anime teddy bear hologram with little angel wings emerged from the baton as the girl yelled: "Show them the power of my love Bear-bear!"
The flying teddy bear gave a wink and thumbs up (with courtesy sound effects) before it pulled its own wand out and dozens of pink heart-shaped beams shot out, cutting down the girl meanwhile started chatting as she whipped out her SMG. "When I say bang you say dead! Bang!" She fired a burst and nailed a bandit in the head as he gave out a "Urk!"
"Bang!" She fired at a Psycho, hitting it in the heart, making the man yell "OW-IE!"
"BANG!" The last shot hit a Marauder in the head causing it to explode. The girl jumped in joy. "YAY! GO TEAM!"
"What the hell?!" Axton said in surprise as Gaige stared in amazement.
Kai, on the other hand, had a face of utter shock at the people who had shown up. "Oh please-"
Before he could finish a fourth person jumped from the roof behind them and spun a few times before nailing a superhero landing. He stood up and started walking forward with a strong sense of confidence that just seemed to emanate off him. A few Psychos charged at him, ready to cut him to shreds. The first bandit was shot dead by a bladed Jakobs Hammer Buster, blowing a golf ball-sized hole into the bandit's chest. The second one he whipped out was a Luck Cannon which he fired a single round into the Psycho head at near point-blank, adding to the already growing viscera. The third and final one ran at him from the front only to receive a Spartan kick right to the face, launching the Psycho into the air.
"SOOO BADASS!" The Psycho yelled, as he smashed headfirst into a wall which was rewarded with a loud snap of the psycho's neck-breaking. The man then pulled out a gold and green sphere from his belt.
"Wait, isn't that?" Gaige started to say, recognizing the device.
"Rise, Xarvasdys!" The man yelled with a booming testosterone-fuelled voice as he tossed the sphere. There was a flash of green as a massive, green European style dragon appeared. Opening its mouth, the monster gave off a massive roar that echoed through all of Hollow Point and scaring the nearby bandits.
"Oh shit! It's the green doom bringer!"
"RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"
"We're not worthy of its malicious grace!"
The dragon unleashed a torrent of flames that swept over all the bandits behind Zager and Blood Rage. When the firestorm ended all that was left was a cloud of glowing embers and ash. Zager looked back at the dragon and then to where he left the body bag he had brought, only to see it burning. "Fuck this, it not worth it anymore." With that, the black painted Hyperion Hawk took off into the sky and flew away.
"NOOOOOO! MY ARMY! MY BROTHERS! I'M GONNA GUT ALL OF YOU AND MAKE A WARDROBE OUT OF YOUR HIDES. FOR I BLOOD RAGE THE MIGHTY AM NOW SWARN BY BLOOD OATH TO HUNT YOU ALL DOWN TO-"
*BANG! PING!*
Blood Rage looked down to find a new bullet hole in his chest, right where his heart is. He looks back to see Kai's Clementine pointed at him. "... I fucking hate-" Kai fired again, putting the shot square between Blood Rage's eyes, knocking the midget onto his back. Kai and the Vault Hunters then turned to the four strangers who came together in front of them.
The first one was a massive stocky giant who towered over everyone at almost 250 centimeters. He had a messy mop of brown hair and greeted them with a simple smile. He wore a simple pair of baggy black jeans, blue long sleeve shirt that had the logo for the Intergalactic Mega Wrestling League Nine thousand. A large set of leather straps held up a massive backpack with an explosive barrel held in it above a holding mechanism.
The next one was a teenager with slick black hair, with a long pointed nose. He had on a set of ripped dark blue skinny jeans and an open black leather biker jacket. A white shirt was visible beneath the jacket On his head was a set of beaten up black headphones that had seen better days and an old pair of high-end black tint sunglasses. The entire outfit gave him a hipster/greaser look. His head was bobbing to a beat that could be somewhat heard. In his hands were a pair of rare Vladof machine pistols that seemed to be of the cryo element, and a set of the sprayer on his wrist.
Then there was the teenage girl. She was of average height for her age and had long straw-like blond hair tied into a single ponytail and big blue eyes. She wore a green and gold cheerleader outfit with the word Alpha printed across it. Over it a bandolier strap slid across her chest between a rack of double D's that held up what Kai would (begrudgingly) call a black 'tactical purse' made of modern soft Kevlar and a pink camouflage bow rested on its clasp. Her shoes were some kind of high heel combat boots. Kevlar leggings reached up her long legs to her mid-thighs, just below the skirt. On each wrist, a green and white pom-pom was held in place with a gold scrunchy. In her hand was a very rare Maliwan slag SMG.
The last one was a handsome, muscle-bound Adonis with a thousand-megawatt smile, deep green eyes, cleft chin and well-groomed short golden blond hair who stood at just over 200cm. His outfit was similar to Kai only with several differences. Where Kai had a more bare steel color to his armor and gear that looked a bit more used, considering the number of dings and scratches it had. This man had much cleaner armored plates that were a polished green metal with fine gold trimming. He had two shoulder pauldrons, the left was a straight polished gold finish with a crest which had a black dragon head over a green shield with the words Alpha Squad in old English font written below it. His arms were missing the vambraces and Holo blade emitters that Kai used, instead, the man had full-arm green gauntlets, including armored gloves like a knight.
On his left side, he had a photon emitter pack that looked a little beefier version than Kai's. Slung under it was a longsword in an ornate green and gold scabbard. A golden Dragon head amulet hung from his neck with a large emerald clutched in its jaw with red rubies in its eyes that seemed to glow. "Hello fellow warriors, we saw you were in trouble with these miscreants, so we decided to render our assistance."
The Vault Hunters stared at the group until Kai broke the silence. "HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS ALIVE!?" Kai yelled in horrified disbelief.
They all looked at him for several seconds, recognition slowly growing on their faces. "KAI!" They all yelled, charging up and tackling him in a group hug. After several seconds they all let go of Kai and backed up.
"Kai, just who are these people?" Gaige asked.
Before Kai could respond, the blond Adonis cut him off. "Ah yes, introductions are in order. Squad sound off!"
"Tobias! Throw explosive barrels for friends. Am guard for friends… I like friends." The large one, now named Tobias, said with a loopy smile. The way he talked made him seem like one of those with a big heart but a marble or two short of a full set.
"I'm ICE! Because I'm CoooooOOOOOOL as ice!" Said the spiky-haired teen as he threw up devil horns with his hand.
"He-he, I'm Kare-Kare, with a K, and this dear little bundle of joy is my cute little friend Bear-Bear." The blond said as the bear jumped in the air with its own set of pom-poms. "And I'm the squad support."
"And I am Dirk Hardpeck the fifth! Noble warrior and leader of-"
*PHAT* Everyone looked to the source of the noise to see an extremely small ninja, that looked to be almost a full head shorter than Gaige. Their face was covered by a black hood and a jade green scarf. The rest of the outfit consisted of a baggy ninja gee that hid any distinguishing features, including apparent gender. On the ninja's back was a very rare Maliwan corrosive sniper rifle that looked almost comically large compared to the small ninja. At the moment the ninja was holding a ninjatō blade with a glowing, red hot edge. Fresh blood was both dripping off of it and sizzling from the heat. In the ninja left hand, it appeared as though the ninja had dragged over a choking Raging Goliath by a steel wire wrapped around his elongated neck.
"Oh, I almost forgot, our youngest member Jade, who is our scout." Jade seemed to sigh at Dirk's introduction, whether it was because of being called the youngest, a scout (which really undersells the person's obvious trade), or a combination of both was unknown. "He doesn't talk much." Dirk said as Jade yanked the wire causing a loud sickening snap to be heard as the Goliath went limp.
"Anywho, as I was saying, we are the Alpha squad!" Dirk yelled as they all took an action pose around him. Some less seriously than others.
Axton and Gaige just stared as Kai facepalm himself. "That still doesn't answer my previous question." Kai mutters loudly with a tired sigh. Before anyone could answer they all heard the approach of another large group of bandits if the smell and foul language was anything to go by.
"Let's take this somewhere safer." Dirk said.
-Smash cut to Raider HQ, Hollow Point branch-
"Welcome to the Hollow Point Raiders HQ my new and old friends!" Dirk said as everyone walked into the makeshift command center. The Hollow Point branch wasn't much more than a modified machine shop and storage warehouse that was once used to maintain and store heavy mining equipment. Kai looked around and saw the CO.
"Captain Banks?" Kai asked.
"Yes?" A man in Crimson Raider armor with yellow shoulder plates answered as he turned to Kai. "Ah you must be the support we requested."
"We found them out on Conners street being attacked by a bounty hunter and the Golden Skags." Dirk said. "They were nearly overrun by the time we found them and assisted them."
"Yeah… Thanks for that... I guess." Kai said hesitantly.
Dirk gave a hearty laugh and slapped Kai on the back. "Not a problem my long lost comrade."
"Ow…" Kai muttered as he rubbed his back.
Gaige looked between the two men. Both wore similar gear but were completely different in personality. . "Sooo, how do you all know each other?"
"Ah yes! Well, our old friend here used to be part of Alpha Squad a few years ago." Gaige and Axton looked to Kai for confirmation.
"For a very short time I was, but that was five years ago. What I want to know though is how are you all even alive? I saw the attack from orbit, hell I called it in. There was no time for anyone to get out of there."
"We were at Ny Berkåk base preparing for a raid on Frost Glen when we were alerted to the missile attack."
"Your welcome by the way." Kai muttered.
"The base commander was able to get us to an old Ganges transport ship they kept there. We were only just able to escape before a missile hit close by." Dirk said sadly.
"Wait you guys got out on-" Kai started to say before the others interrupted.
"It was SOOOO UNCOOL." Ice shouted out.
"Jack killed our home, friends, and families." Kare-Kare said as the Bear hologram started crying watery anime tears.
"Yes, it was dare I say, tragic." Dirk said as he bowed his head. "We lost a lot of good, and innocent people that day. But now that you are here we can strike back at those who helped kill them."
"What are you talking about?" Kai inquired.
"Recently our scouts have discovered a secret Hyperion weapons development lab run by Dr. Randol Lobotomous." Capt. Banks interjected.
"Lobotomous… As in Hyperion's lead exotic weapons engineer?" Kai asked with sudden interest. "The bastard is here!?"
"Who is this… Random... Lobotomy?" Gaige asked.
"Lobotomous." Dirk corrected. "One of several scientists who helped develop the weapon that killed Polaris, or the Mass Liquidator as Hyperion called it."
"Commander Hardpeak suggested we request some help to assist in this endeavor." Banks said.
Kai just stared at Banks for several seconds, looked to Dirk, and then back to the officer. "What do you mean Commander Hardpeak?" He asked with a furrowed brow.
"Dirk here is in charge of the Raiders here. Since coming here we have had victory after victory against Hyperion. Recruitment is at an all-time high, and morale has skyrocketed. We're lucky to have him here, but I believe he and his team should be transferred to Sanctuary. With his help the Crimson Raiders may be able to finally turn the tide of this war against Handsome Jack!" Banks said, leaving Kai dumbfounded. Axton was surprised and Gaige looked at Dirk with awe.
"That's Dirk for you, always leading the charge." Kare-Kare cheered.
"Dirk is the cooOOOLEST LEADER!"
"Friends please, let us not make this about me."
"You've been here only two months and are already leading a whole Raider cell! That's so cool!" Gaige said, causing Kai's eye to twitch.
"Enough of that, we need to discuss plans." Kai said as he tried to get the discussion back on what was important.
"I agree. Before we strike the lab in question we are going to hit a Hyperion supply convoy tomorrow that is supposed to be carrying heavy weapons and ammo to a Hyperion outpost. With those weapons, we can ensure our victory." Dirk proclaimed with an infectious smile and a glint in his eyes.
"I mean it's smart that you plan on hitting the convoy for resources, but doesn't it seem a little rushed?" Kai suggested. "What about the details, also, when and how are you planning to hit the la-."
"It's simple, it's bold… I like it." Axton said.
"If it involves sticking it to Handsome Jack then count me in! I still have to pay him back for the train fiasco." Gaige yelled.
Kai looked to his friends. "Hold on. Are you guys insane? This plan is-"
"Then it settled! We attack at midday tomorrow. Now, come along my new friends, let us procure you something to eat." Dirk said as everyone left the room leaving Kai standing there.
Kai just stared at the door they had walked out of. *Sigh*... "Just like home… Come on Hati, we got work to do… Hati?" Kai frowned, looking for his holographic companion.
Outside in the back of the base Hati and DT were glaring at the Teddy Bear and the Dragon holograms.
-Robot/AI translator is now active-
"Well well well! If it isn't the dinosaur. you need some more RAM, old man." The floating bear said.
". . . Your only two years younger than me you stupid care bear ripoff." Hati growled as DT looked between Hati and the other two A.I. holograms.
"Hati, I thought these were your friends? Your Comrades?" (Author Note: I see DT sounding like Alphonse Elric from the English DUB of Fullmetal Alchemist with the translator on because he is still only a few months old and is basically still a kid… With heavy weapons.)
". . . I prefer… Coworkers." Hati muttered to the floating death bot.
"Who the kid?" Bear-Bear asked.
"Right, this is Deathtrap, or DT for short. He's an anti-bullying robot that the redhead built and generally stays in her robot arm. DT, meet Lizard Face and the Chew Toy."
"CHEW TOY?!" Bear-Bear screeched.
Xarvasdys held his head up high over Hati and DT. "Show some respect to your superiors, mutt."
"HA HA HA! You, my superior!? May I remind you, your base AI code is copied from mine, so you two should be showing me respect! I'm basically your father… On second thought, no, if you two were my kids I would have disowned you for being such annoying and arrogant drittsekker (assholes)."
"Isn't that a little harsh Hati?" DT asked uneasily.
"Look, kid, when you've known someone for as long as I have, you'll begin to understand just who they are. And they are nothing but a pair of damn drittsekker."
"HEY! WHO ARE YOU TO CALL US DRITTSEKKERS!. . . Xarvasdys what a drittsekker?" Bear-Bear asked the dragon who just ignores the question.
"Either way, my master is of a higher rank than yours, so show some respect." The dragon stated.
"Your master is a higher rank than my partner? Please. First, Dirk was never higher rank than Kai. The same rank, yes. Higher rank, fuck no. Second, your human isn't even mentally capable of supervising a salad bar."
"HOW DARE YOU!," Xarvasdys roared. "MY MASTER IS A MAN OF HONOR, INTEGRITY, INTELLIGENCE, VALOR, STRENGTH-"
"Oh great, now he's triggered." Hati muttered as he started walking off as Xarvasdys continued to ramble on while Bear-Bear listened and nodded in star struck awe. "Come on D, there's no point in sticking around. It'll be all day with him."
As they moved off DT looked to Hati. "So… they're not friends?"
"No they are not, and neither are their… masters. Pfft, I hate that word. It denotes a hierarchy rank that is given, not earned." He was silent for several seconds until he stopped. "DT, these Alpha are bad news."
"In what way?"
"There's a darkness that surrounds those teenagers and their malware… servants. A plight that circles them. One that may entrap you and your builder if you are not careful."
Deathtrap just lazily stared at Hati for a moment. "You're doing it again."
"Hmm? Doing what?"
"Being cryptic again, trying to be dark and mysterious. Hati, you're already a badass wolf based on an old mythological wolf that tried to eat the moon. You don't need to add on to that or drag it down with cliches… an annoying cliches at that."
"But it makes me sound so wise and mysterious."
"No, it doesn't, it makes you sound like a crazy old man."
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING…" Hati stopped and thought about it for a moment. "Fine, I concede the point. Now, what were we talking about?"
"Those pieces of malware."
"RIGHT! Okay in simple terms shit happens around them, from stupid to deadly. They tend to get into a lot of trouble and will drag everyone around them into their messes." Hati glanced at DT. "Whether Gaige is involved directly or indirectly, shit will happen when the Alphas are near, so be extra vigilant, because Kai and I won't always be around to watch her. So for your builder's sake, keep a close eye on her... I would hate for Kai and myself to lose another friend, you included." The wolf said before despawning, leaving DT to ponder what he said before despawning himself.
X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X
"So then, Tobias throws me into the air above the foul beast, where I drew my sword and came down upon the! With the force of a bull I run my sword straight through its head and out of its mouth!" Dirk said with gusto as he recounted a tale of adventure to Gaige and Axton as they sat in what was considered a mess hall. They both had been there for several hours now, listening to Dirk's and the other Alpha's stories about their time on Polaris and on Pandora. "And that is how we saved the orphanage in NoWheresville from a rabid acid-spitting badass mega skag."
"You guys are so BA! Fighting Hyperion baddies, alien creatures, Bandit hordes and Murphy knows what else!"
The other looked to Axton for an explanation for Gaige's odd choice of wording. Axton looked up from the toast he's eating. "Just ignore it, it would take too long to explain." Everyone seemed to accept this and move on.
"Just how did you all come together?" Gaige asked.
"It was Dirk, he was only twelve when he first led a dozen other people against forty Hyperion Soldiers and defeated them. He's been leading the fight ever since and slowly formed Alpha Squad, made of the best of the best." Kare-Kare giggled.
"Just how did you guys get this good?"
Dirk gave a sad sigh with a sad look of remorse. "That is a tragic tale that started before I was born. My parents originally were the king and queen of Zallerth, the Hardpecks had been proudly ruling Zallerth for five generations until a group of knights and nobles rose up and rebelled against them. Those still loyal to our family smuggled my parents off the planet where they escaped to Polaris in hopes of raising help to hopefully retake the throne from the rebels. A year after I was born. Since I was old enough to walk my father has trained me in the ways of a knight and prepared me to take the throne back. However, Hyperion came and attacked Polaris, during the first few years our town was mostly left alone. Then a platoon of Hyperion soldiers came to police the town. My parents, both noble warriors who had come to love the town, tried to stand up to cruel oppressors, and were gunned down in front of me."
"Oh my spark, that awful!" Gaige gasped.
Dirk nodded somberly as both Kare-Kare and Ice were crying crocodile tears. "It was a painful day, but I took my pain and anger and focused it. I soon rallied a group of brave fighters to oppose the tyrants. We charged them at dawn and chased them down like wild dogs until they were all killed and left to rot like the scum they are. A rebel cell learned of my achievement and recruited me into their ranks. I soon proved myself over and over with each battle and made friends and allies along the way." He motioned to his friends. "With our combined talents, we soon became known as Alpha squad. The light that snuffs out the darkness, the hareld of justice, and the thorn that is always digging into the foul beast that is Hyperion!" Dirk proclaimed as he triumphantly stood up with his right hand pointed up in show.
"Of course, even with our strength, we were not prepared for the cruelty that Handsome Jack wrought, so now we seek to end his reign." Dirk said as he sat down.
"Wooooow, I wish I could be as cool as tough as you guys." Gaige said.
"I saw you fighting." Dirk proclaimed with a cheerful glint in his eyes. "While you still need experience, you do have more than enough potential to be a great warrior, maybe enough to become an Alpha. Why don't you join our squad for the mission tomorrow."
"Gaige perked up at this as her eyes glowed in new found anticipation. "Are you serious?"
"A genius like you, it would be great." Kare-Kare said gleefully.
"Does this mean new friend?" Tobias asked.
"I'm more than willing to let a promising warrior join us in battle." Dirk nodded in a sagely manner.
"COOOOOOOL!" Ice shouted as Kare-Kare cheered and a dopey smile crossed Tobias face. All the while Jade stayed quiet as he sat on
"How about you Axton, would you also like to join us in the upcoming battle?" Dirk inquired Axton as the man finished a sip of his beer.
"Nah, I'm gonna be teamed up with squad B. Need to spread the heavy firepower around after all." Axton said before taking another drink. "Besides, it would be good for you to hang out with more people your own age."
"Well with that we should all go and rest up for tomorrow. Feel free to go to the armory to get any gear you might need."
"Cool, I'll do that now. Ax, you coming?"
"Nah, I got what I need, you go ahead Red."
"Alright." Gaige said before getting up and leaving the mess hall. She walked through the base past a dozen Raiders as she made her way to the armory. She began to wonder where Kai was at when said Rebel walked out of a nearby room with the sign Records' posted outside. "Hey Kai."
"Oh, hey Gaige."
"Man, you look tired. What have you been doing?"
"Going over mission reports for the last few hours, Roland wanted me to look them over and compare them to the ones he'd been receiving while we're here."
"That sounds boring."
"Extremely." He said with a depressed sigh. "So what are you doing?"
"I'm going to the armory for some ammo and gear for tomorrow's mission. The Alphas invited me to tag along with them during the mission."
Kai just stared at Gaige as if she grew a second head. "Fuck no."
"What?"
"I said fuck no." Kai repeated sternly.
"Why not!?"
"First off, you have only been at this for a month, you lack both the skill and experience to take on a Hyperion convoy as part of the advanced group. Second, just because the Alphas act all cool, and badass doesn't actually mean they're that good."
"Kai, that's crazy! Did you see their moves? They were all so cool!"
Kai folded his arms and sighed. "Not really. They just got lucky with the surprise attack and capitalized on said surprise with more shock and awe tactics… Although calling them tactics would be giving them too much credit honestly." Kai muttered. He looked back to Gaige who looked to be not paying attention. "OI! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING!"
"Huh? Sorry, did you say something, I was thinking about how cool and awesome the Alphas are." She answered, causing Kai to just sigh as he muttered. "Dammit Dirk."
"Hmm, what was that?"
"Nothing… Look, Gaige, you're not equipped to fight the type of enemies a Convoy has. Hell we haven't even got you a rocket launcher yet, let alone the training to operate one."
"It's fine Kai, besides how tough can a Hyperion convoy be?"
Kai gave her a blank look. "It is a standard Hyperion Type Four weapon transfer that will have a Theta level escort, which entails at least four APC's with two squads of Commandos guarding along with the store of Loaders kept on hand. Plus there's at least typically one reaction reinforcement pod that Helios keeps on standby that can be dropped in a moment's notice if we aren't fast enough to hit the APC's." Kai stated flatly.
"That's easy."
Kai just stared at her before letting out another sigh and pinching the bridge of his nose. "Gaige this is not up for negotiation, you will not be tagging along with the Alphas. There is just too much that can go wrong, especially when those idiots are around. They're a fucking disaster waiting to happen."
"Kai! How can you say something so awful about them!" Gaige shouted.
"Because it's true."
"But they're so cool!"
"And once again, coolness doesn't immediately translate to skill Gaige." Kai said a hint of annoyance creeping into his voice. "Most, if not all of their achievements have been done with the help of mind-bendingly good luck. Joining them in battle will do nothing to help you and-... Where did you go?" Kai looks and sees Gaige walking away. "Where are you going!?"
"As I said, the armory. I've got to be prepared if I'm joining Alpha's tomorrow for tomorrow's op." She answered seemingly oblivious to the argument they just had as she jogged away.
"Gaige… GAIGE!..." But the teen was already gone, leaving the Rebel in the hall all alone. Kai let out a sigh of defeat. "Just like home, dammit."
X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X
Torgue Mini-Adventures
Chapter 4
On the last Mini Torgue Adventure… "So what are we gonna do with it?" Billy pointed to the small boar.
". . . . We could eat it."
"TORGUE!" Billy yells before they shoot off into Hyperspace.
And now the continuation…
The Torgue-anought erupts out of Hyperspace portal back into normal space. The jolt of the sudden exit woke Billy up from a nap in the main Galley area. After he gets up and stretches Billy heads to the cab/cockpit section with Remington or Remmy (the boar) who had been sleeping with him in tow. Since the visit to Fake Pandora the boar had… slowly worked his way into the crew. Initially, Mr. Torgue was not kidding about eating the little boar. It took four days, twenty-three bites from the little boar, several chases, and a fight between the where the little boar somehow learned to fire a Torgue pistol it had grabbed with its jaw to convince Mr. Torgue to not eat the little fellow. Now Remmy was a part of the crew, albeit with the occasional melee and/or shooting match between the two every few days. As a way to show his membership, Billy had put a checkerboard pattern handkerchief with the Torgue logo around the little boar neck with a pair of old military dog tags. Mister Torgue gave Remmy a purple rarity Torgue pistol in a skag leather holster which the piglet wore on its side. The thing that confused Billy the most though was how the hell did the little boar reload his gun and where did he keep the extra ammo?
Billy and Remmy made it to the cab where Mr. Torgue was looking at a sensor screen on the console. Outside the window, Billy could see they were flying through a large asteroid field with a distant sun on the left and a red and tan nebula as a backdrop to the other side.
"So tell me again why the f*ck we're taking this strange route? Hell, I don't even know what system we're in."
"Well after going over some calculations and maps, I was able to find us a shortcut through this asteroid field. It should cut about three days off of our journey. Although it is kind of strange that it's listed as dangerous even though it's only a category asteroid field." Billy said as he took a seat while Remmy jumped up on the top of the dashboard.
"Why was it marked?"
"I don't know, it doesn't have any anomalies or steller phenomenons according to scientific data." Billy continues as Torgue notices some parts of several different destroyed spacecraft floating about as they flew through.
"Out of curiosity, what is this area called?"
"It is listed as Area B7R."
Mr. Torgue slowly turns to Billy with a blank face. "Did you just say B7R?"
"Um, yeah… Why?" Billy asked a bit unnerved by Mr. Torgue's uncharacteristically tense reaction.
"BILLY YOU IDIOT, B7R IS THE F*CKING ROUND TABLE! THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST CONTESTED AREA IN ALL OF THE GALAXY BECAUSE IT SMACK DAB BETWEEN THE OSEA AND BELKA TERRITORIES! YOU NAVED US INTO A F*CKING WAR ZONE!"
*BOOM* A sudden explosion rocked the truck as several fighters flew by with several more chasing after them firing away with lasers. Mr. Torgue broke the ship away from the engagement only to end up in a large open expanse of the asteroid field where hundreds of fighters were duking it out.
"Oh god, I have become error." Billy said in fear as he stared at the battle in front of them.
"Not the time to complain Billy, now get the radar up and find us a way out of here!" Just then the Torgue-anought violently shook as alarms started blaring.
"What the fuck was that?"
"We're taking fire! We got five- NO! TEN BELKAN FIGHTERS ON US!"
"INCOMING MISSILES!" Billy yelled.
"HANG ON!" Mr. Torgue put the space truck into a steep dive and spin causing anything in the ship to start flying around including Remey who was squalling as he flew back and forth. "We're gonna be f*cking stardust at this rate! Billy turned on our countermeasure system!"
"Got it" Billy yelled rapidly searching the controls until he found a set of buttons and hit the activate all countermeasures button.
As the Belken fighters closed in several compartments pop open on the Torgue-anought as turrets, missile launchers, minelayer, pulse defense cannons, and a slingshot throwing explosive rubber duckies all deployed and started firing at the fighters. Several were destroyed by the immediate onslaught of fire as the others broke off.
"I thought you said these were countermeasures, not the SHOT BACK BUTTON!"
"In a F*CKNG GUNFIGHT SHOOTING BACK IS A COUNTERMEASURE! NOW HANG THE F*CK ON!"
They ducked back into a denser area of the asteroid field in an attempt to weave through the asteroids dodging fighters and taking several more out. "Okay, there should be an opening in the field we can use to jump out of here up ahead." They flew around a large asteroid and into the opening, only to come face to face with a massive black ship that had slitted wings and a massive hanger deck running the length of its body. And there was a massive battle taking place around it.
"F&CK ME! That an Aigaion-class heavy command cruiser! One of the top ten most dangerous warships according to the Torgue companies yearly consumer report guide! With three-time the firepower of a Dahl Overkill class heavy battlecruiser, and a stem to stern hanger bay that can carry over 500 fighters! . . . We need to get the f*ck away from that thing!"
"I'm plotting a new course- LOOK OUT!" Billy yelled as Torgue swerved the space truck out of the way of an Osean AC-1000 that cut them off. Mr. Togure veered the space truck out of the way just in time but put them on course for a new threat. The command cruiser's massive hanger.
HANG ON BILLY WE'RE GOING IN!" Mr. Torgue yelled as the Torgue-anought flew into the hanger, all the while trying to dodge, ships, cranes, and well… everything in the hanger.
"We're losing space fast Billy." yelled in panic as he noticed they were getting closer to the middle of the ship which had more vehicles blocking their way.
"No worries I F*CKING got this!" Mr. Torgue then proceeded to take out a hammer and smash a glass-covered on the control dash, throw the hammer away, and punched the button which read 'FUCK ALL!' on it. All over the space truck more missiles, rockets, cannons popped out and started firing indiscriminately all around them.
If one were to see the cruiser from the outside they would be witness to a chain of explosions ripping along the hull of the ship from the midsection that quickly traveled to the stern which exploded out as a fireball and a single ship flew out.
"YE-HAAAAAAAA!" Mr. Torgue screamed as he flew the ship away from the now sinking cruiser.
"YES! We're home free!" Billy cheered before looking at the sensor screen again. "Oh shit."
"What? What the- Oh Sh*t." Outside the window were two dozen angry Belken starfighters who were heading straight at them.
"We got several more on our six as well." Billy cried out. Several warning alarms blurred as several blips shot off the fighters behind them. SHIT, missiles!... To think I'm gonna die because damn student loans got me here!"
Before anything else could be said the two were shocked to see the missiles streaking by them and instead hitting eight of the Belken fighters in front of them. The remaining fighters all began to panic and break off in every direction.
"We-we're alive? How?" Billy asked.
Before Mr. Torgue could respond four black fighters with swepped wings flew over the Torgue-anought and quickly engaged the running fighters. In a display of complete space dominance, the four fighters quickly dispatch all of the fighters in a beautiful but deadly display of skill and precision. After the fight, the four fighters then came around and formed up on the Torgue-anought wing. Mr. Torgue looked out at one of the fighters and saw on the nose of the closest fighter a painting of Valkyrie on a shield backdrop, just under that was a stylized banner reading Razgriz Space Command Squadron. "This is R1 callsign Blaze to unidentified ship stated your business."
Mr. Torgue grabbed a CV trucker radio mic off the dashboard and answered. "This is Mr. Torgue of the Torgue-anought. My copilot actually took us into this area without knowing about the battles here. We were just trying to get the f*ck out of here when we got caught up in the battle… Please don't f*cking nuke us."
"Nuke you? Buddy you just took out a god-damn Belken Cruiser. We should be slapping a medal on you two and hulling your asses to the nearest bar to buy all the drinks you want!" Came a deep masculine voice.
"Swordsman, let Blaze finish." A female voice berated.
"Thank you, Edge. But I don't disagree with R3. I'm sending you coordinates and IFF codes so you can safely navigate through outside of the line and out of here. It the least we can do for assist our efforts."
"Um, thanks." Mr. Torgue said sheepishly. "I'm not really used to people thanking me for blowing sh*t up."
"Captain, report from command." A fourth voice cut in. "Mobius squadron has spotted the Scinfaxi and are requesting backup."
"Roger Archer. Torgue-anought, wish we could escort you out but duty calls. Safe sky and peaceful travels." The black fighters then broke off and flew at full speed to their next objective.
"Nice bunch." Billy said.
"Yep, let's get out of here." said as he turned the ship away.
X-X-X-X-X-X-X-O-X-X-X-X-X-X-X
I am so glad to have finally gotten this chapter out… I actually had to break this chapter into two parts along with the next one because they both got a little too big.
(Tina) I should be happy, but I'm just too tired at this point to care about this section.
(Gaige) Where Torgue?
(Kilo8) Dealing with another nuclear diaper.
Gaige and Tina both grimace at the thought.
(Kilo8) Alright everyone, first I want to say sorry for not having a chapter up for Mercenary Day, Christmas, Hanaka, Kwanzaa, New Year's, Life Day, or whatever holiday you celebrate… As well as just one chapter in general in the last seven… eight months? I don't know anymore, but I have a good reason. The first being, my dear sister had her first kid a few months ago, a happy, healthy little baby girl. Which means I'm now an Uncle!
"Hip hip hurrrrrrrrray." Both Gaige and Tina cheer tiredly.
(Kilo8) Now while my little kickass niece is good and healthy, my sister… *Sigh* It has just been a fucking mess, since the minute she went into labor. I mean it has been one thing after another. First, they had to do an emergency C-section which was rushed but successful nonetheless. But then the hospital botched her recovery by sending her home earlier than she should have been, AFTER A C-SECTION MIND YOU! After that, she had to go back in and out of the hospital several times because of different complications that could have been avoided if she had been given a few more days of recovery. Also between the checkups after release, they screwed up twice with the wrong diagnosis. FUCKING TWICE!
(Gaige) It's really fucked up how they handled her recovery.
(Kilo8) Yeah well, because of it, I've learned that the old saying "It takes a Village" has never been truer. It's been all hands on deck to help out with the baby since then. Plus I've gotten sick because of the stress (Not C-19), been looking for better work, the viral outbreak, end of the world, blah, blah, blah. . . *Sigh* . . . Enough of that! On to other news.
Firstly, I will periodically start updating my profile with a news section for the progress of my chapters… And other plans.
(Gaige) Wait, what do you mean?
(Kilo8) Let's just say this wait wasn't just all life shit. I am proud to announce the release of my second story on this site! . . . Sort of. Anyways I give you Rebel Anarchy: Side Quests!
The basic idea with this series is that it picks up the smaller quest missions that the main story misses. It won't be a priority story as it just a way to keep me active with the story if I hit a case of writer's block. Although there are several missions that I will not be included because of them being too boring or… Well, I don't think anyone will be opposed to ignoring the time-sensitive missions.
(Gaige) God, I hate those missions.
In other news, the story finally reached 200 favorites!
"HAZA!" The girls yelled.
(Kilo8) I'd like to thank everyone who has followed and favorited this story, the support means a lot… Although I wish I was getting more comments, not to complain or anything, but I have only gotten five since the last chapter release. Shoutout to those who did. Blaze1992, Vedahzii, 7thManiac, thank you for the awesome reviews, always good to hear from longtime fans. CrimsonGeist, Wing Omega, and ghostitan thanks for the kind words, votes, and joining along for the adventure.
Anyways, I want to gauge what the rest of you think so far by asking you these questions. What have you liked the most or found the funniest in this story so far and what you disliked the most? Note that grammar doesn't count, because I know already and consistently go back to make fixes. Shout out to Redemption's Avenger and alexyo3 again for helping with editing, as well as GrammerNazi1598 who helped to make corrections on several earlier chapters. And of course, if anyone wants to help just PM me.
So, tell me what you all think in the comments. Also, I will be taking ideas, suggestions, and maybe whole written shorts for Torgue mini-adventures. My only stipulations are to keep it short, no more then 1000 to 1500 at most please, and Billy the Bullet has to stay in costume. I have plans for him. Any easter eggs and references need to be noted at the end of the PM, and most importantly, it got to be funny, but that really goes without saying. And if you do write one, PM it to me, we want to keep it a surprise if it is chosen. Just remember to do it through the main FanFiction website and not the APP.
Next item on our list. Vedahzii there your dragon! Granted it not Hati but you can't put an AI wolf into the body of a massive dragon so easily.
(Tina) FIGHT ME YOU VIAL LIZAR- GAH!
Gaige had her hand covering Tina's mouth.
(Gaige) Tina, no yelling while the baby is here.
(Tina) Sorry.
Moving on, the votes I set up several chapters ago. I'm hereby closing the poll for the A.I. Core mission. The winner of which will be revealed in future chapters. The remaining questions will be still up until this arch of the story is complete. As a reminder those questions are,
ONE: Which character should receive the Excalibasterd?
TWO: Which clan would you side with at the end of the Clan Wars?
Note, votes will be taken through PM's and reviews since the site won't let me run two polls at the same time. Also a reminder, the PM system in the FF App works but doesn't give me reminders… Most of the time.
(Kilo8) Next for today the Q&A section!
(Tina) We got just one from Blaze1992. Could Gaige build an upgraded version of DT, aka a Bada** version? Maybe making it into a mech suit like BT from Titanfall 2?
(Gaige) A Bada** version? Wait, does he mean Bata?
The others shrugged.
(Kilo8) I didn't know anyone else got a voicebox like Mister Torgue. As for a mech suit… As cool as that would be and as much as Gaige would love it, I don't think it can really work. Plus it just wouldn't have the same effect now since Moze and Iron Bear were introduced in BL3.
Speaking of BL3, I FINALLY got to play it when the Steam release dropped. And DAAAAAMN was it good!
(Tina) I look sexy as fuck all grown up!
(Gaige) We both do! Although I wish we had more interactions in it. That was lame.
(Tina) Plus that Ava chick, dear Mothrakk girl, why are you such a whiny bitch! Also, not my first choice to lead the Raiders.
(Kilo) Yeah, I have to agree with that. The only other issue I have is with the Anointed weapons. Only like 3 or 4 of the anointments are really decanted, and then that only if you match it with the right Vault Hunter half of the time. I honestly think the Luneshine system from the Pre-Sequel was superior and more useful in the long run, although Gearbox does seem to be working to improve it so I'll give it time. My only other gripe is that I can't seem to find a Jakobs rifle in the damn right configuration! SERIOUSLY, how hard is it to find an assault rifle with the preferred parts that basically make it an M1 Garand! The parts are there but I can never seem to find a Rare or Very Rare variant of the en bloc clip loader guns!
(Gaige) You just want an in-game Clementine.
(Kilo8) Damn straight! If it doesn't have the PING, I don't use it!... Right. Next, the winner of the last egg hunt!
(Tina) Nobody played.
(Kilo8) Really?… Not even one? Aw man, and I had a whole list and everything. And Gaige was in charge of confetti.
(Gaige) No confetti?
(Kilo8) No confetti.
(Gaige) Awwww.
(Kilo) Well, I guess it's time to wrap this up. Final notes, I will start periodically updating my Profile page with the current progress of new chapters and other stories and will date when the update was posted. I'd like to say sorry again for the long wait, and I'm going to start shorting the chapters into smaller parts after the current arch. These massive chapter updates take too long to make and check. This doesn't mean I'll be cutting content, I'll just be making them into more manageable pieces. So with that, we just like to say we hope you enjoyed the chapter.
Just then Mister Torgue ran into the room in full Hazmat gear.
(Torgue) GUYS! EMERGENCY!
(Kilo8) What going on, do we have a biological breach?
(Torgue) Worse, your nieces latest diaper has gone f*ck*ng super critical!
(Tina) . . . Well shit.
(Kilo8) *Sigh* Stay safe everyone. CODE RED! CODE RED!
Alarms start blaring as everyone scrambles out of the room.
-ECHO Review Log Terminated-
UPDATED-6/11/2020