Author's Notes: Hurr Hurr! 40 chapters in and the fun has just started! Lawds, this chapter was sooooo hard to write! But it was time…take it all slow guys! XD ALSO this story will now have a permanent 'M' rating (I thought I did it before...guess not). LET THE READING BEGIN. *epic music*

WARNING: This chapter is rated M. for Sexual Situations. You have been warned.

Love or Blood

Chapter Forty: Lust

xxxx

The Count had walked me to my room. My feet moved slowly and my legs wobbled; his bite had zapped me of my energy. It was a pleasurable tradeoff as I was too tired to worry over my behavior in his bedchamber. I could not focus on any of the racy things we had done. Ignorance is most certainly bliss.

He had monitored my consumption of the two potions. I drank both without complaint. One to heal and one to keep disease at bay, I thought to myself as I wiped my mouth on my sleeve. The Count then took ahold of my wrist and intently listened to my vitals. After a moment or two he nodded and checked the small bite-marks on my neck. Of course they had vanished due to the potion but he still gently prodded the skin to test its tenderness.

Once he was satisfied with my state of health I kicked off my shoes and sprawled out on the bed. "All I do is sleep now," I groused into the pillow. "I don't like it. My dreams are awful."

"I'm sorry for that…would that be why you asked me about dreams and Daedra?" The Count questioned softly.

"Yes but I don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry, Sir." I sighed and kept my face in the pillow. I felt sleep already closing in around my conscious. I rubbed my eyes. "I'm afraid I might fall asleep on you."

"I'll take my leave then." The Count replied. I was surprised to hear him move towards me. I peaked at him and watched as he pulled the throw blanket from the foot of the bed. He gently placed it up around my shoulders.

"Thank you," I said quietly, slightly confused by his actions. He only nodded and bade me goodnight, leaving seconds after. I was now far too comfortable to question him. I simply closed my eyes and accepted all he did for me.

XXXX

The following morning Hal-Liurz decided to check up on the Count. He allowed her into his room without the slightest bit of irritation or indifference. She was very grateful for that, if not surprised too. Moreover, she noticed just how small he looked, for a man of great stature something was different and she wasn't sure if it was for the better. His eyes were downcast, his actions and words lacked enthusiasm. Even his usual biting tone was absent.

The Stewardess poked about the room, speaking idly to the Count as he continued the never ending paperwork that came with being in his station. "How does the arrangement fare?" She finally inquired – her true reason for visiting. "Your color is excellent but you yourself seem distraught. Has something else happened?"

Janus looked up from his papers briefly. He found her casual words and probing stare uncomfortable. "Our arrangement is a private matter for me. If you wish to gather information go and speak to Abigale Lynn. She is sleeping at the moment, however."

Hal-Liurz folded her arms across her chest. "Really a private matter, hmm? Well it certainly wasn't private the first time. You nearly having killed her and all." She expected him to retort in some mildly hostile way. A jabbing comment, a glare or in the least an early dismissal, but none came.

Instead the scratching of his quill halted for a moment and his shoulders slumped down further. "Yes…she and I hate myself for it." His quill began to move again. "If you've only come here to worsen my conscience I regret to inform you that it cannot get to a lowlier state. I have saved you the trouble. You may go."

"I will go nowhere unless Abigale wishes me to." The Stewardess snapped. "Feeling sorry for yourself is not going to improve either of your lives. Be grateful of her willingness to you."

Suddenly the quill the Count had been holding splintered in his grip. For a moment he was quiet and the Stewardess watched him somewhat apprehensively. Janus then blew the remains of the broken quill off of his desk and opened a drawer to retrieve a new one. "I am exceedingly grateful to her, Hal-Liurz. However I don't appreciate your opinion on the matter. Despite what you may think you are an outsider when it comes to the relationship her and I hold. Do not presume otherwise. You may go."

Oddly satisfied with the Counts passion and guilty heart, the Stewardess did indeed leave. She thought it best to check up on him regularly and make sure he was still contrite. He was less likely to hurt himself or anyone else that way.

xxxx

The next day my usual ritual continued. I slept for the better part of the day and rolled around in bed with my mind racing for quite some time before I finally bathed and dressed. Eventually I rang the bell in my room for Tualga. She came shortly after with food and mead. I was surprised to see the liquor but she insisted on sharing the bottle while we played cards. I agreed and although I did not care too much for the taste it helped brighten my mood.

We played for some time while she told me the goings on of the Maids Quarters. I was also overjoyed once she pulled a copy of the Black Horse Courier from her satchel for me to read. I did so as she cleaned my room, claiming that I wasn't to help her in any way.

Eventually the hour grew late and Tualga had to leave me. I was sad to see her go but happy that she had wanted to spend time with me again tomorrow. Maybe it was a nice break from her usual chores.

The clock eventually chimed eight and I was quick to leave behind my embroidery to see the Count. Being with a friend for the day had put me in high spirits and I was eager to see him. Besides the unsavory side effects of his bite I found last night to be endearing. He greatly cared for me and I was pleased to see it return to his actions. I supposed my heart was healing from his wrongdoings and I wanted to reciprocate his affection.

I briskly walked down the corridor and stopped at his bedchamber. I adjusted my skirt before knocking in attempts to make myself look more presentable. I had forgone the more ornate dresses and opted for a pretty green colored blouse instead. I felt more comfortable in simple clothes as they reminded me of the hand-me-downs Rheena had gifted me long ago.

My hand grazed the brass knocker. Everything that I feared would happen had happened, but strangely enough it wasn't terrible – odd, yes but terrible? No. The irony of it all caused me to smile slightly. I thought back to so long ago when I had first knocked upon this very door. Only I would go robbing a vampire…

Clunk, clunk, clunk.

The door groaned and creaked as the Count opened it from the other side. I was so used to the loud door and looking up at a vampire. I was so accustom to sleeping the days away and busying myself at night. A life without sunshine in the large castle was my norm. I found it all amazing what time could do to you. And given time I would grow accustom to our unusual arrangement too. I knew I would.

And so I gave the Count a small smile and bowed my head to him. He repeated the gesture and invited me inside.

"Good evening, Sir." I said to him lightly as I entered the room. "I apologize for arriving a little early. I wished to see you and thank you for the other night." I watched him as he closed and then locked the door behind me. My brow quirked as I noticed the way his fingers deftly moved the lock. It was as though he did not want me to see the action. I pretended not to.

"There is no need to thank me Abigale Lynn. I feel it is my duty to see you safely off to bed. You do me a great service, after all." He strode over to me, wearing a grin that did not touch his eyes. "I do apologies again for the effect the bite has on you. I am very certain that if we continue with the way things are the intensity will fade as it becomes routine."

"That is what I hope for." I answered honestly, noting how his untrue smile faltered. I frowned at his behavior and looked him over diligently. Something was obviously upsetting him. I wanted to ask what was wrong but I was unsure of how he would take my empathy. I bit my lip, my good mood leaving me as concern took hold. "If you wouldn't mind me saying Sir, you look...troubled."

His smile fell completely. "I see no reason in lying to you," He sighed heavily and nodded. "So yes, as a matter of fact, I am very troubled."

"But why?" I asked, even though it was not my place to do so. I thought perhaps we were beyond stations now. "Is it something I said or did?" The look he gave me indicated that it was the correct assumption. I internally bristled but took great effort to appear as calm as possible.

"It is not necessarily an action, nor is it a spoken word." His answer was quick and yet deep. I only frowned at him. "It is…it is something impossible to explain. Let us just leave it at that. I apologize for worrying you."

My frown deepened as I searched him. His eyes held so many emotions but his face remained impassive - as I was keeping mine. "I'm not worried." I replied, stepping forward. "I would like to know what it is that's troubling you." He sighed and looked irritated. I fought the urge to place my hands on my hips. For some strange reason, I felt brave. All that he could have done to me, he had. The little fear I still harbored for him was beginning to diminish as his Vampiric bites shone him in a new light. They made him seem…human.

I paused and we only looked at each other, "Have I no right?"

His change of expression was immediate. He obviously had not expected me to continue. In truth, neither did I. The Count looked me over peculiarly. "Perhaps, perhaps not." His vague answer irked me. I chewed on my lower lip, coming closer still.

I felt a strange magnetic pull to him as I wondered what I had done this time. The previous occasion where he had accused me of something went over badly. I decided to be bolder, hoping to weed through whatever barrier he put up in effort to keep me guessing. "Is it about my blood?"

He shot me a dangerous look. "Why would you ask that of me?" Before I could respond he shook his head angrily and stormed to the other end of the room where he proceeded to pour himself a drink. I stood there and observed for a bit before I felt compelled to follow him. Again it was that strange magnetic pull.

I walked around the column where he had first bit me. I brushed my hand against the stone in passing. "It's the only thing I can think of." I answered honestly. "I'm not sure what I could have done this time. I've been in only one room."

The Count seemed to shrink a little at my comment. He looked over his shoulder at me, his expression softened, his words somewhat pained. "I know. Why haven't you come to see me?"

I shifted, suddenly feeling very small. Much had happened between us and I was still only recovering. My body was on edge whenever I was in his presence, more so than usual thanks to the biting. It was a mixture of embarrassment and pain that kept me away. To come back to him so willingly felt odd, which was why I had neglected doing so, disregarding the few minutes earlier I arrived this evening. I hugged myself.

"I don't know. I suppose I wasn't sure that I was welcome to…or ready." Again I worried my lip. The Count turned to face me. "There's just so much of everything. Hurt and happiness. It's impossible to explain as well." I tried to smile, but it became a nervous smirk, and I avoided his gaze.

He placed his goblet down and walked to me. "We should know how to communicate with each other by now." He too offered a sad smile. "I feel it is my fault. I put too much pressure on you."

"I don't think so, Sir." I shook my head and looked up at him. The sincerity of his gaze was startling. It felt as though there was an invisible force in his stare, pulling my eyes to him. His face looked fragile and tired, despite his newfound health. It was like a sickness of desolation wreaked havoc on his form; his eyes holding that last flame of his true self. It was then that I noticed that inward flame only burned when his eyes met mine.

I thought back to before all negativity had transpired between us. We had grown so close. All felt common and normal. Boundaries had been blurred and formality had stripped. Maybe that was what we had done wrong. Perhaps we should not have grown so close…but we did. We became friends and I missed it terribly. He would hold my hand and look at me. I had felt special and nervous but mostly important. I yearned for the closeness of my friend and all that we once had. Maybe it was small and I was exaggerating our relationship. Maybe it was built off nothing but little gestures and odd glances. But it had been my norm and I had grown accustom to it. I liked it and wanted it back.

I sighed and thought back to the day he dropped to his knees before me and apologized. The small comfort I could give him then was my touch. So I tentatively reached up to his cheek. It was there upon his cool flesh did I feel myself again. The gentle contact reminded me of his compassion and softness, two sentiments that he had harbored for me so long. I closed my eyes and reveled in the familiarity of myself. Only when I felt his fingers on my wrist did I open my eyes. The touch was so gentle that I lingered for a moment more before brining my gaze back to his.

I gasped, immediately alerted to sight of his fangs in his partially opened mouth. I pulled my hand away, feeling hurt like no other.

"I'm sorry!" He said forcibly, trying again to take my hand. "You don't understand. I cannot help it." His face was pleading, urgently trying to capture my affection again.

"N-no, no it – it's alright, Sir." I stammered, unsure of how to properly react. I swallowed hard and reminded myself that I should have expected as much. This was our arrangement. I should not be hurt by it. "You…you need to drink." My chest pained me in a way I could not stifle. Regardless I shakily unbuttoned my blouse for him. "Here."

The Count bowed his head to me, his expression reflecting the pain I felt inwardly. His hand reached up and touched my bare collarbone. A look on his face that I could not define nearly transformed his features. He closed his eyes.

"Sir, y-you want this. Please," For a moment he only buried his face in his empty hand. I watched on nervously. He gave a tight nod to himself and stepped away.

I inhaled deeply as he walked behind me. I had expected to be told to sit on the sofa. Instead I felt his fingers brush my ponytail aside to allow him better access to my neck. The action caused my hairs to stand on end. He aligned out bodies justly for the act. I closed my eyes, tilted my head away and waited.

There was a long pause. The stillness worried me.

He placed his hand on my shoulder and I felt him bring our bodies even nearer. He lowered his mouth to my ear and again silence stretched. "I don't want this, Abigale Lynn." He finally spoke. I blinked but otherwise did not move. He leaned further down, pulling me into a tighter embrace as his mouth closed around my flesh. Then I waited for the pain that never came. He pulled away slightly and repeated the process, his lips gently closing around my neck. I went rigid. He was kissing me.

"This, Abigale Lynn," He said in a low and gruff voice. "This is what I want." With one hand wrapped around my waist and the other up caressing my cheek, I felt trapped. My eyes darted around the room as my mind desperately sought out an explanation for what was happening. I found none, and he went back to showering my neck with gentle kisses.

I could have pulled away. I could have said no, but as each kiss climbed the length of my neck, I found myself so struck by sensation that I remained immobile.

He moved up to my jaw, then cheek, so carefully, testing the waters as he inched ever closer to my mouth. When finally his lips reached the corner of mine, I closed my eyes and slowly turned my head to him. I had little control over myself; the action was instinct and my face burned. The Count placed his mouth on mine in the slowest yet most forceful way possible. Little white sparks exploded behind my eyelids. My jaw, lips and tongue all trembled as he deepened the kiss. It was soft and wet. My heart began hammering in my chest. It struck against my ribs like a drum, playing an angry, purposeful beat.

The Count then lowered his hands to my waist, coaxing me to turn and face him. I complied. Everything shook, my world spun, but each shudder that ran up my body was more pleasurable than the last. Each touch was electric, painful to the mind but beautiful for the body. It was dangerous and exciting. I should not have encouraged it but never before had I wanted something so desperately despite not knowing what it was I wanted. I did not understand any of these feelings but they were good.

It was nerve-wracking.

The Count's hands began to roam my body. They ran up my sides and down my back. Each touch was swift and intense, as though he wished to feel every part of me but his hands were not absorbing the information fast enough. I too began to explore the expanse of his chest. Having been clutching his overcoat in a vicelike grip, my fingers tingled at the feel of him. I ran up his broad shoulders and thick arms - half of me not noticing that we had begun to move.

Eventually the back of my thighs hit something soft. My body felt like it was on fire as I was gently coaxed down on the edge of the Count's bed.

His mouth left mine for a moment and I stole a glance of him. He was taking off his overcoat frantically. His eye met mine as it fell in a heap on the floor. "Gods I have wanted you for so long," He said huskily, bringing his mouth back down to mine. I had to turn my head away from him to catch my breath. This did not slow the Count as he went back down to kissing and suckling all the sensitive parts of my neck. I burned internally, wanting him in ways I did not know.

His head lowered further as he began to taste and suck the tops of my breasts. His fingers slid in-between my cleavage and he groaned. His hips pressed flush to mine as he laid me down. I reveled in his caresses and the desperation of our combined actions. It was as though something had snapped inside me – a simmering pot of water brought to a full boil and spilling over. I kissed his jaw, finding my own trepidation to hardly pose a hindrance. That spilling, bubbling pot of want inside of me made a steam that clouded my rational. Reason was gone, replaced by desires and curiosities that I had never known.

My arms shook as I grabbed him, enjoying the hardness of his body against my own. I was then startled by him lifting one of my legs and hooking it on his arm. I gasped as he slid my skirt up and over my hips. I pulled away slightly, but it wasn't noticeable enough for him to stop. Only when he placed a hand over my sex, did I make and involuntary squeak and grabbed his wrist.

I met his gaze. His pupils were dilated, looking like black saucers with a little red rim. He licked his lips as he thought of something to say. He was being far from gentlemanly, or at least I thought so. All actions were driven by want, and I mirrored him. He pulled his hand away from the cloth of my panties. "Too soon?" Was all he said, looking like a baffled child. I sucked on my swollen lower lip, his wrist still in my hand. I realized then how I had always liked his hands. How large they were and how cool and soothing his touch was to my fevered flesh.

My face burned as I lowered his hand back onto my undergarments, feeling his palm engulf the small mound of flesh between my thighs. "No." I breathed, closing my eyes and pressing my lips to his again.

His passion returned tenfold over my willingness. His kisses were starved, his body heavy and fixed on top of me. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he began to apply pressure to my womanhood. I gasped around his mouth at the sensation, his erection pressed painfully into my thigh. Little jittering sparks flew about my vision as his fingers gently caressed my most secret of places.

My back arched at his ministrations, causing me to brush against his prominent arousal. He sucked in a breath and groaned into my breasts. His hand then slipped under the cloth of my undergarments. My body jolted at the sudden foreign feeling. Pleasure coursed through my veins. I blushed feverishly and my mouth hung open. Each digit deftly moved against my burning, slick, flesh. My body was getting hotter and my muscles began to tighten. "Sir," I warned in a whimper, feeling overcome by desire and pleasure.

"Janus," The Count said, confusing my addled mind. "Say Janus, Abigale Lynn." I shook my head. I couldn't bring myself to utter his name. All was so quick, good and muddled. I was afraid speaking his name would bring reality crashing down over me. I was numb to all but pleasure and I wanted to keep it that way.

My body shuddered as I grew desperate for the sensations he was causing in me, but before they reached the brink of mind-numbing gratification, the Count pushed a finger inside of me. I yelped and pulled away from him. The intrusion was uncomfortable. He looked down on me worriedly, reading the pained expression on my face.

"What's wrong?" He asked with great concern and confusion. "Did I hurt you?"

I wetted my lips and nodded. He began to pull away from me slightly and I so missed his touch that I grabbed ahold of his wrist to keep him from going far. "I -" I began, embarrassment and nervousness playing across my features. "I've never…I have never been with a man, Sir."

He looked bewildered. "What? Oh!" His fangs were still prominent as he opened and closed his mouth, searching for something to say. "I'm sorry, I did not know…" He let out a long slow breath as he tried to calm himself. "Forgive me…Gods, you are so beautiful…I-I'm sorry, we should stop."

"No, no!" I whined, not wanting to lose what I was feeling. "I want you to touch me. I-I just thought that I should tell you." He seemed a bit at war with himself over the new information. Thinking quickly I unbuttoned the rest of my blouse and shrugged it off. "I want you to touch me." I repeated, feeling my blush return. He needed no further encouragement.

We were again entangled. "Nothing you don't want," He said to me and I nodded. With quick fingers, he reached up and unclasped the little button that held my brassiere in place. My breasts spilled from the loosened cloth, and I too shrugged that away. Never had I been so bare in front of a man before. "But you must tell me when to stop," He said urgently as he removed his own shirt, "Because if you don't, I won't."

I nodded mutely as I eyed his naked torso. His body was pale and sculpted with a dusting of back hair on his chest. Harsh lines of muscle were prominent everywhere I looked. For a moment I wondered what he had done to get or maintain his physique, but then I stopped thinking as he slid me further onto the bed, my head meeting the pillows.

He kicked off his boots and crawled over to me. My heart started racing again. He took ahold of my skirt and gently began to pull it down, my shoes following. His hands came back up to my undergarments and he looked to me for approval before removing them too. The process was painstakingly slow. His eyes roamed my body and watched heatedly as my last bit of clothing slid down my thighs. I heard it hit the floor with the softest of sounds, yet it was blaringly loud to my own ears.

I was entirely nude on the Count's bed with nothing but my stockings left on my body. The Count then took the ribbon out of my hair and laid me down. His chest heaved as he pulled back to look me over. "You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen." He murmured. His eyes met mine for a moment before he looked down and began unlacing his pants.

I watched him hiss as he struggled to pull himself free from the confines of his trousers. What I beheld when the deed was done was nothing short of baffling. The Count was apparently well endowed. Too well, I thought, blinking in surprise.

He came up beside me and placed his hand on my arm. "You're cold," He said as he then pulled up the blanket from under us. He tucked it around my shoulders before gathering me in his arms. Feeling his erection pressed against my bare stomach caused me to shudder. He smiled and stole another kiss before rolling unto of me. He caressed my breasts and toyed with my nipples. I squirmed under him and arched my back again. He had himself propped up on his elbows as he took my hand in his and guided it down under the blanket. My fingers brushed against his hardened length before he coaxed me into wrapping my hand around it fully.

He shuddered as I felt him. It was big, frighteningly so. But a sudden emptiness and wanting in my loins indicated where it belonged, and where I wanted it. I knew losing your virginity hurt, but everything he had done thus far was amazing. "Would it…would it feel nice in me?" I asked, the words sounding foolish in my own ears.

The Count's member twitched as he registered my words, I pretended not to notice. He kissed my neck, "It will hurt at first." He warned. "I would be as gentle as possible, not careless."

"I want it." I breathed, releasing him from my hold.

"You're certain?" I nodded quickly and parted my thighs. Yes, I wanted this. I did not know why but I did. My body screamed for him and I could only comply. "I'll be gentle." And I trusted him despite knowing better.

The Count shifted above me and lined himself with my sex. I held my breath. "Just look at me Abigale Lynn and hold me as tight as you can." Again I nodded and wrapped my arms around his neck.

The head of his length pressed against me and I gulped. I tried to steady my breathing as I gazed over his shoulder. He applied more pressure, forcing his way to the entrance of my core. He pushed against me and my vision distorted as I felt my insides begin to tear. My breath hitched and I squeezed him tight. It burned and I felt the distinctive stress and give as he forced his way inside, but the pain did not stop. I whined into his shoulder, unshed tears blurring my vision. My muscles contracted and pulsed around him, unable to grow accustom to the intrusion.

He was still moving, still pushing, still not fully in me yet. "W-wait! Wait!" I pleaded, squeezing my eyes shut. He stopped immediately. I groaned and shifted beneath him, pain shooting through me at the slightest movement. Was it supposed to be so painful?

I could see the strain in his face as he was forced to remain half inside of me. He wanted me and I wanted him but I was uncertain if I could stand the pain of it all. I gave in to trying to adjust as it seemed my body was incapable. I only nodded for him to continue as I buried my head in his chest. Again it seared, and I clenched my teeth. After what seemed like eternity his hips met flush to mine. I trembled at the foreign feeling. I felt full and complete despite the pain. The Count showered me with kisses, both heated and gentle as he remained still, sweetly trying to help my body grow accustom to his girth.

I closed my eyes as he then began to move. Pain coursed through me again as he pulled his member halfway out and then forced it back in. My breath came in ragged pants in time with his thrusts as he repeated the action. Again. Again. Again. Slow but meaningful. He grunted above me and pulled me closer.

Blissfully the pain began to subside. It was still prominent, but pleasure soon made itself known. I moaned as each movement of the Count's hips astonished me. Pain and pleasure mixed into one miraculously wonderful, aching sensation. I wanted more and for it to stop at the same time.

He cupped my face with one hand and kissed my lips feverishly. The speed of his thrust increasing. My head fell back and I moaned loudly. His body shook as he kept himself from hurting me while still maintaining speed. He growled into my neck and bucked hard. The action caused me to shout in a mixture of pain, surprise and pleasure. I liked it.

He repeated the action, causing my breasts to bounce and mouth to hang open. My heart banged in my ears as the earlier lustful pleasure was rekindled. Had there been no pain it would have been bliss. His movements became sporadic and desperate. I gripped the bed sheet, reveling in his hard, heavy body on top of me. He swore, grabbed my hip and continued his erratic assault. He planted a rough kiss on my parted lips. "Gods," He choked, before burying his head next to mine. He groaned and his body tensed. A warm burst alerted my senses as the Count spilled his seed into me.

My body trembled, my groin ached, and my head was pounding from all the increased blood flow. The Count remained inside me as he shakily brought himself back up onto his elbows. His hair was disheveled and he looked exhausted, but there was also a strange sincerity in his eyes. "I love you, Abigale Lynn." He said, looking down hard at me. I had felt so far-gone in sensation until those words were spoken. I froze beneath him. "I have loved you for so long now. I love you so much I ache. I have wanted you for so long…"

I swallowed hard, unsure of what to say back. "Y-you love me?" I questioned, my mind and body still out of focus.

"Yes I do with all that I am…you don't need to say it back to me. I have just longed to tell you."

I blinked and tried to smile at him the best that I could. "You love me?" I repeated, touched and flabbergasted at the same time. He nodded. "I-I don't know what to say." I bit my lip, "I…Sir." Despite the nervous uncertainty in my words a smile stretched widely across his face. He was obviously happy to have relieved himself of the burdensome secret. Not knowing what to say I leaned up carefully to kiss him, wincing as I moved. It seemed pain had returned.

I did not think much about the small exchange we had after sex. I decided it was best not to. Instead I focused on the Count pulling himself from me and laying by my side. I was still trying to catch my breath. I wanted to get up and clean myself, I felt extremely dirty, but the Count insisted that I stay in his arms and rest. I thought it best not to question him as he pulled me to his chest and stroked my hair. We smiled small and nervously, like two children who had gotten away with something. And in that moment it was how I felt.

In the Count's arms I felt safe from all. I may hate myself in the morning, but in that moment I was happy. Soon after I fell asleep.

Author's Notes: OH LAWDS I FINALLY WENT THERE?! Yes, yes I did. Love it or hate it? Do let me know!

Any idea how hard it is to write a sex scene it first person while trying to keep it classy? Nearly impossible! *dead* XD