Author's Notes: Oh my LORD this chapter sucks soooo much! Please forgive the poor quality! And I am so sorry about the wait! I've moved to a bigger place, been planning a wedding, and a whole lot more. I can't write much. Not to mention I tend to get writers block in the summer. So this was a complete struggle but I NEEDED to get this chapter posted so I didn't have to look at it anymore. This entire 'thing' was making me miserable. I didn't even want to pull up the damn document… But instead of scrapping the chapter completely I thought it would be better to post as is. I think I made you wait long enough anyway.

Love or Blood

Chapter Forty-two: Tricky

xxxx

I said nothing as the Count returned to the room. I tried my best to look nonchalant and still my rapidly beating heart.

He closed the door and stepped to me in one smooth motion. His expression was light and cheerful. I still found his change in demeanor intriguing. I was so very used to his violent mood swings or an overall dour ambiance. I tried to mirror him and look happy, but having just been 'caught' by Tualga I wasn't sure how I was supposed to feel.

Should I feel guilt and shame or should I be content… perhaps prideful?

I was so puzzled that I hardly registered the Count having sat down. I quickly shook all my thoughts and looked up to him. He sighed happily as my gaze met his. "I do not think I shall ever be over seeing you in my bed," The Count cocked his brow playfully. "However, I prefer you to be nude among the pillows."

A smile broke out upon my face and any niggling thoughts vanished. Whenever the Count smiled at me, so close to me, my entire being lightened.

With a blush on my cheek I reached out and stroked his knuckles. "I wish only to be nude if you are too." I bit my lip again. Racy talk was not for me but the Count beamed at my gentle caress and not-so-subtle invitation.

Yes, I wanted him again. The pain I had suffered from my first time could not hold a candle to the desire that still lingered in my belly. It was a beast that could simply brush all cares aside and leave room for nothing but want. And all I wanted was the vampire before me. All the pain and all the blood was a small price to pay.

Feeling overcome and bold, I sat up and gently pressed my lips against his. Seeing the reaction I could get from him over a slightly lewd comment had empowered me. I was addicted to expression - his expressions. I wanted to see him again hovering over me, gathering and savoring my features, seeing his brow fixed in concentration. I wanted to hear his guttural moan and watch his lips part. I wanted to marvel again at the glint of his fangs.

My body trembled as my mind and the Count's quick and heavy response to my kiss had me seduced. I was hot and hungered for his mouth to be on mine again and again.

We were quick to entangle. An onslaught of wet and starved kisses ensued. My hands clutched at the fabric of his clothing as I forcibly pulled him closer. Heat radiated from my body and I felt angered by my own need. I wanted to be one again.

Everything I felt was new and powerful. My lust was so great that it was almost frightening. My body burned for the Count and demanded that I act on instinct, but deep inside there was a part of me that twisted.

That fire will rage on, girl. Only a man may dowse it.

I pushed all thoughts away and kissed the Count harder. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held him. My knuckles turned white from my grip but the Count did not mind or notice. I blocked out all but him and surprisingly it worked. I simply let lust take me and did not think again.

xxxx

We rolled around the bed like two young lovers and kissed until our lips bruised. But our clothing stayed on out of fear for that dreaded knock to sound against the door. Still, once it finally did we nearly jumped out of our skin.

The Count insisted that I stay in bed while he answered the door. I did not argue as I was content to remain seated until my rapid pulse stilled.

He stood and left the room. I hadn't truly noticed that he had left the door ajar. I was too busy twirling my hair and awaiting his touch again. I was soon surprised when I heard talking in the hallway. Hal-Liurz sounded terribly upset about something. I craned my head to further listen on the conversation when in walked Tualga with a tray of food.

My fiery blood ran cold. I was at first mortified that the Count had allowed her to enter the room, more so when she had shut the door behind her with her hip.

Our eyes met as she placed the tray down by the foot of the bed. I stared at her owlishly, knowing, or feeling wrong. I could not move. I felt stunned. Her eyes were sad.

Finally I wetted my lips. I knew I had to say something to her. Tualga did not look disapproving but…sad. So sad. "I-I did not know that you would come in -" I began awkwardly. But was quickly cut off when she turned her face sharply away from me.

"Dammit, Abigale Lynn…have you no concept of danger? Do you care at all for your own wellbeing?" Her words though powerful did not strike me as deeply as her tone did. She sounded so unhappy. "Please Abigale Lynn stop this. Y-you don't know what you're doing. You don't know what you're getting into."

She still did not look at me but I watched her as she wiped a tear from her cheek. I was so mortified by this that I did not know how to react. When she finally turned to me again she placed her hand on mine and whispered. "You will be hurt by him again. Value yourself. Don't continue this."

And then she turned and left the room. I only watched the door, wondering what she had meant and feeling so conflicted that I could not react.

I only stared and waited for the Count.

XXXX

The Count had permitted his Housekeeper to enter his bedchamber whilst he had a word with his Stewardess. He would have rather ignored her pestering ways but there was something different in her tone that made him stay. Urgency. Sheer urgency.

So together they walked a small ways from his chamber until Hal-Liurz thought they could not be overheard.

"My Lord I think you are a blundering fool." The Stewardess snapped so unexpectedly that Janus nearly recoiled. "I know what you are doing. No, I know what you have already done! How could you be so foolish and impulsive?! Are you completely mad?!" She hissed, trying desperately to keep herself from being overheard.

Janus narrowed his eyes and straightened. "What on Nirn are you going on about?"

"Don't give me that innocent nonsense!" She snapped, "We saw Abigale Lynn in your bed! Have you lost your mind? You are a Vampire! You nearly killed her a few nights ago! Did you forget?! What about your station as well, hmm? A Count bedding a slave while still legally bound to another! You are the most reckless and idiotic man I have ever known! What have you done now?!"

Hal-Liurz trembled with anger as she stared up at the man who she had once admired for his strength. Whether or not he cared for Abigale Lynn did not matter. What mattered was that the girl was in even more danger now than she was before. The Count was still a married man and a tormented one at that. The Stewardess could no longer trust him. He was weak to his Vampiric needs now. She could envision something going awry, an argument, Abigale Lynn finding out about Rona…

"None of this is of your concern anymore, Hal-Liurz. If you recall, you are no longer my Stewardess. I keep you here for familiarity and no more than that! Had Abigale Lynn not cared for you I would have thrown you out myself. How dare you question my affection! She is above all else! To Oblivion with my station, I need it no longer!"

"And what of your wife?"

The Count paused, his eyes narrowed and his lips pulled back into a snarl. "What of her?" He glowered.

"You may not care anymore, but I know someone who would care had she known that you were married." Hal-Liurz declared, effectively silencing the Count.

xxxx

The Count returned several minutes later. He smiled and apologies for having me wait. I only nodded to him as my thoughts still surrounded the odd encounter I had with Tualga. I wished that the Count had not let her in and I wanted to tell him this but I also did not want to relive the conversation. And so I stayed silent.

The Count sat beside me and stroked my hair. "You've not yet eaten." He pointed, whilst prodding the tray. "Does any of this appeal to you?"

"It does," I sighed and tried a little smile. "I just…forgot about it while I was waiting for you." The Count moved closer to me and I noticed the slightest change in his demeanor. His eyes looked a tad redder than usual and his smile did not feel genuine.

But still he insisted that I was to eat. I did without complaint and took comfort in the Count's arms around me.

Once I had finished he cleared the plates away. I thought it was a job that should have been mine but was still happy to see him take the initiative to do it. It was also a little comical to see.

He came back to the bed and without so much as a word he laid himself on me. Propped up on his elbows he stared down at me. His look was intense and desperate. Finally I gathered up the courage to ask him what was wrong. "Sir, is everything alright?"

"Only when I look at you," He answered swiftly. "You are my beautiful escape. Without you there is nothing."

I frowned. "That's not true, Sir. You got along fine before I came."

"Did I now?" The Count asked in a hushed tone.

Author's Notes: THE END. Nah, not really. The end of this crappy piece of…of…of crap! So yeah, I told you it was bad but hopefully I can make up for it in the next chapter. Thank you all for being patient and tolerant. I really appreciated all the pm's I received too during my absence. Unfortunately my summer-metal-block is firmly rooted. I'm going to take things easy so I don't have to post such a poor excuse for a chapter next time. :)

ALSO I did not proof this thing at all! Forgive me!