Is it just me or are these things getting shorter and shorter as I go along? lol. Anyway, here is the next one. I have decided that there will be four chapters only. Sorry, I'm running fresh out of ideas. Humor and comedy just isnt my first nature. I love your reviews, so please leave a note for me. I hope you all like it!

Enjoy!

-White Scribe

To those that when they see him in their minds start to giggle. And to those who talk endlessly about him online. To those who are currently reading this story and wondering where the heck I'm coming from. Yes... this 'is' about you. No, I don't stalk you, you're just a stereotype. ((knocks on your skull)) I hope you know what that means, btw.

Military Cosmo!

All your military, body guarding, make up and relationship tips in ONE magazine!

ew.

There are two things you need to generally know about a Butler child. One is that they like extremes.

/Juliet sat in the living room, twirling her blonder hair in one hand and holding a phone to her ear with the other, talking rapidly to someone about make up./

/Butler sat in silence in the security room, inspecting with narrowed eyes the clarity of each camera as it rotated./

The other thing about Butlers is that they have moments in their life where they very randomly seize to pay attention to everything as they usually would. This is not because of lack of concentration, but rather, lack of having 'time' to loose one's concentration...Day dreaming sneaks up on those who are not accustomed to doing so. And perhaps such an unusual habit makes their brains... somewhat... To put it bluntly. Stupid.

As Butler stared at the screens his eyes grew dazed and soon the images began to blur. Thoughts of very random things began to swim across his vision and he could hear nothing but the constant buzz of the mechanical objects in the room.

The peace across his mind might have remained if the door hadn't opened and a very pale not at all calm Artemis hadn't stepped in.

Blinking away the day dream the manservant turned to look at his charge questionably. "What is it, Artemis? You look as though you've seen a troll."

As it so happened, Artemis had been thinking consistantly about the thing that was much worse than a troll in the house.

"Nothing. I'm just wondering... are we planning on keeping this girl locked in here forever? I've already told you we can't let her go."

Butler blinked. "Well, why not?"

Artemis stared.

"You're actually asking me that question..." he stated, in a rather stuned voice. Butler shifted his weight to look at him with an amused expression.

"Yes, that would be correct."

"Perhaps you haven't 'seen' her yet?" Artemis enquired sarcastically, moving to get out of the room, too irritated to speak calmly anymore.

As he opened the door, a flustered Juliet blinked at him, her hand stuck in the motion of going to turn the door knob. She shoved past Artemis and towards her older brother, fuming like a dragon who smoked.

"She needs to GO! I can't stand her anymore! Do you know how many names she has memorized? I haven't even heard of half of them!" she shouted.

Artemis turned, feeling an ally on his side. "You see, she's a monster, Butler, you can't set 'that' loose." he stated, pointing at the white screen of the room where the girl was playing with her hair.

Juliet shuddered. "I pity the mother who gave birth to that."

Butler rolled his eyes. "You two are in need of a psychiatrist."

Artemis scoffed. "I'm several levels above most qualified psychiatrists!" he snapped, and Juliet still fuming stomped her foot. "I don't need a SHRINK! I need a gun! I'm gonna shoot her!" she cried, reaching forward to snatch at Butler's sleeve where she knew a pistol to be.

Butler stood and pushed her away calmly with his other hand, making the scene look much like a playground with a big bully holding back a small child simply by the head.

"Come now, she can't possibly be that bad."

Stony silence replied as the two youths glared.

The manservant sighed. "I believe you both need sleep and rest and I'll let her out if you like. You won't have to do anything-"

"NO!" both teens shouted urgently. He blinked at their frightened faces.

"I do think you need doctors now."

"You- you need to go in there!" Juliet spassed, pointing at the screen. "And you need to stay there for like... ten minutes and I swear it-" she began.

Her voice was rather shaky and her eyes rather wide so Butler sighed and patted her on the head with his massive hand.

"All right, all right. I'll prove to you both she's not that bad."

The two grumbled, seeming more and more alike as the time passed. "Yeah right." Juliet grumbled, following him out the door.

Artemis nodded. "I do believe he's in for the trauma of his life."

Juliet agreed. "No kidding."

Together they followed the man mountain into the hall and then to the door where they stood, glaring at him like very mean guards. He cocked an eyebrow at both, shook his shaved head and pushed the door open, bending down to step in.

As soon as he was inside Juliet jumped forward and slammed the door shut, stepping back with a wary expression. The two teens glanced at each other and shook their heads.

"He's doomed."

"Totally doomed."

"Hello?" Butler asked, looking around the room. It was plain room.The walls were white and the floor was white and the ceiling was white. Aside from the table, which was propped up against a corner with the chairs around it there was nothing.

He cocked his head at the table, for it looked much like a room, with the flat space down on it's side blocking the girl from view.

"Hello? Are you all right?"

"ATTACK!"

Butler started in surprise at the sudden sound of screeching and then gasped as something was thrown at him which exploded in a splash of skin colored something making a massive brown-ish creamy stain across his chest.

The first bomb was followed by other little objects of red blue and purple that seemed to splash color all over, smelling of many different flowers and that very strong slightly stale smell that reminded him of the girl's perfume.

He stumbled back, blinking through the haze of colors, coughing as the smells began to over power his senses.

"What in god's name-"

"Let me out! Let me out! Let me out!" The screeching girl cried, jumping over the table and chairs, nearly falling and breaking an ankle on her high heels then scrambling up to attack him again with flat palmed slaps that made him flinch away.

"What the! God's child- STOP!" he suddenly thundered, grabbing her by the shoulders, lifting her right off the floor and giving her a very hard shake.

The girl stared at him with massive mascara stained eyes and then... her lower lip began to tremble.

Butler blinked at her, having never seen anyone... well... cry before. They had begged for mercy but he'd never really grabbed a 'woman' and been angry enough to shout.

Something like his mother's stern voice drilled into his head and made him blink.

/"Don't you dare ever lay a hand on a girl, Domovoi!"/

He started. "Uh oh."

The girl suddenly opened her mouth and started to bawl, tears running down her face like a cascade of childish emotion followed along by the screams and shouts of anguish that bounced around the room and seemed to knock against his head forcefully, over and over like a massive iron bell.

"No no no... don't cry! I didn't mean it like that!" he started, setting her down lightly and trying to calm her down. The girl's screams, however, only magnified and he put his hands over his ears, squinting at her with dislike.

"You're a horrible, horrible horrible PERSON!" she shouted, her whole body shaking with the emotion, and despite having his hands over his ears he heard.

He blinked at her mildly, feeling just a bit insulted. Perhaps it was the sheer emotion on her face. "Oh, I wouldn't say that really." he began. She scoffed between her sobs and kicked at his shin. The rather heavy part of her shoe knocked solidly against hisit and he cried out, snatching his foot with both hands. "Oh- ow- Gods!" he gasped, balancing.

Still screeching with tears she stepped back, to make him seem smaller, he figured and began to yell. He lost track of the insults, and was soon amazed at what kind of stupidity she was able to say.

But after hearing it from a tear faced woman he began to blink and feel rather badly because many of the things he 'did' know what they meant and never had anyone insulted him past two words before he had their throats in his hands and their body hanging off the ground.

He stood there then, being told off and was actually half hanging his head after her rant, which lasted a good three minutes.

Panting with the sheer exhaustion of exploding she stopped and sniffed. "Now let me out."

The man mountain shook himself awake and then realized he'd been forcefully told off and frowned. "Well now I know what they were both so bloody frightened about." he muttered, deciding to get out of the room right there and then only to hear her cry out loudly.

He turned to see what it was she was doing only to catch a glimpse of her throwing herself to the ground, sliding under and between his legs to come up against the door. She scrambled up and blocked the way, looking very much like an animal.

"NO! Let me out!" she shouted.

He stared. "I think you need a shrink more than Artemis and Juliet put together..."

The girl paled. "They AREN'T together! They AREN'T and NEVER will be! DO you HEAR! NEVER!"

Butler stared at her and on the other side of the door Artemis and Juliet were both staring blankly at the doorway.

"What in God's name is he doing to it?" Juliet asked, wide eyed. Artemis shook his head. "I haven't a clue..."

Pixie: I...am sick. . says:

"Now, I highly doubt either of them are thinking of being 'together' in 'that' manner." Butler tried to explain, but was interuptted by her loud never ending shrieks of protest.

"He's MINE! MINE, you HEAR!" Butler sighed and forcefully took her by the shoulders again, only to find her nails now posing a problem as she scratched and kicked viciously.

He gasped and tried very hard to find a way around her flipping and sliding, but like an eel she kept getting out of his grasp until the tables suddenly switched and she was the one beating and scratching on him with him huddled in the corner trying to keep her hands off.

"Now really! This isn't fair!" he shouted loudly, but she kept right on going, still screaming about something or another.

Finally, feeling he could take no more of it, he gave her a rather forceful shove, sending her sliding to the other end of the room. In a flash he was up and out the door, slamming the door forcefully on her attempt to get up and out again.

He stood panting, outside of the hall, covered in make up, with a tear in his shirt and many scratches on his face and arms.

Artemis and Juliet stared at him, standing calmly at the other end of the hall.

He sighed, and catching his breathe shrugged. "So... I was wrong."

Juliet scoffed. "You look like Barbie gone wrong."

((Barbie gone wrong... man, i just got this picture of butler in a mini skirt. SO wrong.))

Butler glared and rubbed at some of the color across his face. "So... what do we do with her if not set her loose?" he asked. There was a collective groan from the youths and then they stomped away, leaving him to listen alone to the rather frightening screams from within.

Twitching he moved away and shivered. There were things worse than death sometimes...

Sighing he moved away, rubbing at his shaved and now badly bruised head. Muttering, he headed to his rooms to heal his traumatized mind.

Mwuahahaha, this was amusing. NEXT: Holly meet Kathleen.

Man, heads are gonna roll.

Hope you all liked. Please, please review. So many hits and no reviews to show for it. It just isnt fair!

-White Scribe