I'm working at Clayton's taking inventory with Paul, who's unfortunately still harassing me with questions about Christian. God, can I ever go one day without him coming up at all?
"So, how's the penthouse? You settling into your room okay?" he asks as I write notes on a clipboard.
"It's fine, as long as I don't need to see him."
"You two are still not getting along?"
"Why would we? He basically forced me into this marriage and I'm ready to get out."
"Ana, it's not your fault what happened with him."
"Well, I beg to differ," I sigh as I stack a few boxes on a shelf. "Maybe if I hadn't overreacted, then..."
"Ana, stop. You had no idea you were gonna be married to the guy after that encounter at all."
"But still, I highly doubt that it can get worse from here."
Just then the store bell rings and a man walks in, wearing an expensive suit and I'm assuming in his late thirties as he scans around the store.
"Hello, can I help you?" I ask, causing him to turn around and smile politely when he sees me. Do I know this man?
"Luke Sawyer, ma'am. I'm your personal bodyguard." What?
"What are you talking about?" I inquire and Sawyer looks uncomfortable as I do.
"Mr. Grey wanted to make sure that you had protection from the press regarding the marriage, so he hired me to keep you safe." When the hell was Christian gonna tell me this? I don't need a fucking bodyguard.
"Mr. Sawyer..." I start.
"Please, call me Luke," he interrupts.
"Luke, with all due respect, I don't need a bodyguard and Christian had no right to do that. I'm fine on my own"
"Mr. Grey insisted on it, ma'am. Even your father thought that it was a good idea and Mr. Grey ran a background check with Taylor." What? Ray's agreed to this, too?
"Will you be with me 24/7?" I ask, still reeling from this information.
"Just until you're back in court, ma'am. You won't see me again after that."
"And when exactly was Christian gonna tell me this?" Sawyer looks nervous and I feel guilty for sounding accusatory.
"He said that you can discuss it with him when you get back after your shift." Oh, this just keeps getting better and better.
"Okay, fine," I sigh. "I'm seeing my father later this evening, so can you take me there first?"
"Yes ma'am. When would you like to leave?"
"7:30 would be fine and please call me Ana."
"Will do, Ana," he smiles professionally and without another word, he heads across the street and sits at a nearby deli without his eyes ever leaving the store. My husband really has some explaining to do when I get home.
Sawyer parks outside Ray's apartment and after saying goodbye to Julia in her departure, I head inside for the elevators and ride to Ray's floor and find him washing dishes in the kitchen sink when I walk in.
"Annie!" he exclaims when he sees me and dries his hands before heading in my direction and giving me a hug when he gets closer. God, how can I stay mad at this man?
"Dad, when were you gonna tell me that I had extra security?" I inquire once he pulls away. His face falls and I feel guilty in response.
"We just wanted to keep you safe, Annie. We all thought it would be best," he smiles kindly, but I can tell he's hiding something from me. What? What's wrong?
"Dad, what's wrong?" I press gently. He avoids my gaze and stares down at the floor, before releasing me and heading back to the kitchen.
"Dad", I call out and after a moment's hesitation, he turns around to face me.
"Jack's back in Seattle." I freeze in my place and I think my heart has stopped beating.
"What?" I breathe, suddenly feeling as if I'm going to faint.
"Apparently he's trying to find you, but we have no idea where he is."
"Then how do you know he's here?"
"I saw his picture in the paper and it said he was staying here for a while." Shit. Could this day get any worse?
"Annie," Ray says gently and I look up to see that he's standing right in front of me.
"I know things ended badly between you two, and I'm not judging why you left, but if you want to get away for a while, I'm sure Christian wouldn't mind." What? Is he suggesting I run away?
"Dad, it's not that, I just..." I sigh, not knowing what to say." Jack still blames me for what happened between us, but I don't think leaving is the right decision at all.
"Do you think he's out to get you?" Ray asks, interrupting my thoughts.
"Do you think he is?"
"I remember his temper, honey. I know how much he hurt you." Yeah, cheating on me after I refused to have sex with him.
"Dad, I appreciate your concern, but I'm not exactly jumping at the opportunity to see him as soon as I can."
"And what if he finds you? I don't wanna see you getting hurt."
"This coming from the man who has me in an arranged marriage with a billionaire?" I quip and he chuckles in response.
"I'm assuming that you and Christian aren't exactly getting along."
"I had breakfast in my room this morning, just so we could avoid seeing each other."
"Really? You haven't done that since you were ten."
"And who's to blame for that?" I ask while arching a brow.
"Annie, I told you, Christian owes me a favor."
"And what favor is that?"
"It's not my place to say, Ana. Maybe you can ask him yourself?"
"Dad, we're not exactly simpatico at the moment, so why would I want to do that?"
"Just give him some time, Ana. I know he's a good man."
"Who yelled at me because I couldn't get him a deal."
"Well, once you know about his past, it'll start to make more sense." What?
"What do you mean?" I ask. He sighs before giving me a reassuring smile.
"Just give him some time, Annie," he says before kissing my head. "I promise that he'll be worth it. You just have to give him a chance."
Yeah, he's about as worth it as a gun shot to the head.
I arrive back at Escala with Sawyer close behind me and walk in to find Christian on the phone and having a heated conversation.
"I don't fucking care about the cost! I'm not risking everyone's safety." Jeez, what the hell is his problem?
"Did Barney draw up some new plans? I need to see them before tomorrow morning... Well, tell him to get them ready. I can't wait any longer for this deal."
Turning away from the conversation, I walk into the kitchen where Mrs. Jones is cooking something and she smiles warmly at me as I take a seat on a barstool.
"Hello, Ana. Can I get you something to drink?"
"Hello, Gail and I'd like some tea, please. No sugar and bag on the side."
"Coming right up."
"I should've known that you would be boring with your drinks," Christian interjects as he sits down beside me.
"You really wanna accuse me of something when you hired security without my permission?"
"Oh please, I told you this had to be kept a secret."
"And that justifies it how?"
"Are we gonna fight about it or are you just gonna accept it?" he growls through gritted teeth and I sigh heavily in exasperation. Jeez, he's such an asshole sometimes.
"If you don't mind, Gail, I would like to take my tea to my room", I smile as kindly as I can toward her as she hands me my cup and without another glance at Christian, I make my way upstairs.
I step into my room and after setting my teacup down on the nightstand, I slowly sink to the floor as I think about today. Why can't he ever tell me about these things? Or Ray for that matter? And what the hell does Jack want and what does he want with me? God, could this day get any worse? I sigh inwardly as I take a sip of my tea, then suddenly get some inspiration as I get my laptop from my overnight bag, turn it on and open a word document.
Overwhelmed
The anger in his voice is palpable. This I know for certain. Though his words have little meaning and he scoffs when I try to speak to him, I still never understand the affect he has on me, or if I'm going crazy because of the way he makes me feel.
Maybe it's the tone of his voice that makes me feel uneasy. Or the undeniable shake of his body when I try to step too close and he backs away from the touch. Perhaps this is what all "lovers" are like. Therefore concluding what I feel inside my heart, that being the hatred that I feel for this man comes not from him himself, but inside of me as a substitute. Is it just sanity? Or am I insane? If the road continues to grow before me, I might never understand at all.
Was it when I received the news that I was to become a wife? Perhaps the unbearable apprehension of the news, or the well-wishes of my father, permitted me to feel no escape. Even when good intentions were still pure. Although I still wonder if they remain pure for me.
At twenty-two-years-old, my world was perfectly balanced and nothing could disrupt it, until a man with dark, gray eyes entered my life. Immediately shifting my world on its axis, almost causing me to fall and reach for something that wasn't there.
Is this what all relationships are like? Filled with uncertainty and longing promises and confusion? Or am I just overthinking the inevitable and therefore, it's causing me to feel exposed? I wish that I knew the answer.
Regardless, I will try to give this man the benefit of the doubt. Albeit in the pleasing "I'll do anything for my father" kind of way, though I know it won't be easy. Granted he doesn't push me aside like the other man/men in my life. But the question is, will I be able to do this? Or is my mind like my world; twisted and out of place?
I press save on my computer and lean back on my bed, feeling a sense of accomplishment as I finally found some peace. Wow. I haven't been able to write even a full sentence in what's felt like forever.
A year. It's been over a year.
I sigh, knowing it's true. Of all times, I wasn't expecting to find it now.
I hear a knock on my door and jump at the sound and after calling for them to come in, I see Taylor enter my room.
"Hi, Taylor," I smile shyly and close my laptop so he can't see.
"Good evening, Mrs. Grey, er, Ana. I just came to inform you that Mr. Grey has a meeting downtown in Seattle and he won't be back until tomorrow morning. "
"Where is he staying at?"
"The Heathman Hotel, ma'am. He's a regular there and he wanted me to let you know." Of course he did. Why doesn't that surprise me?
"Taylor, can I ask you something?"
"Of course, Ana."
"Do you really think that I can do this? Or should I leave right now?" He looks surprised by my question but smiles kindly when he answers.
"In my professional opinion, Ana, I think you should give him the benefit of the doubt." Shit, can he now read my mind?
"And how do you think I can do that?"
"With all due respect, Ana, you look like the type of woman who can handle anything that comes your way. I highly doubt that Mr. Grey can keep you from doing that at all." I smile shyly at his words. No wonder he works for Christian.
"Thank you, Taylor. Can I do a little exploring?"
"Of course, Ana. I'll be in my room if you need me and Gail's gone to sleep."
"Are you two doing okay?" I ask out of nowhere. Shit. Damn my curiosity. Taylor smiles when he notices my expression.
"Honestly, Ana, I've never been happier in my life." Wow. Why do I find that so sweet?
"Good, I'm glad to hear that. I'll see you both tomorrow."
"Goodnight, Mrs. Grey."
"Goodnight, Taylor, and thank you" I reply and with that, he exits my room. And leaves me on my own. I finish my tea and set my computer to the side, before heading downstairs and feeling a little better after my talk with Taylor. I really hope he's right; I really hope I can do this.
I walk around the great room, staring breathlessly at the amazing view of Seattle, and turn around to find the door of Christian's office ajar and the light on as I do. Odd. Did he forget to close the door? Checking behind my shoulder—good, I'm alone—I step toward his office and start to turn off the light, before I notice a large, manilla envelope sitting isolated on his desk. Frowning, I check again to make sure that I'm alone, then carefully walk inside and stare down at the envelope which spells out RAY STEELE on the right side in the corner. I open the little tab and pull out some paper and glancing quickly at them, I notice there are some documents involving orphanages, foster homes, Clayton's, and a fundraiser called Coping Together.
I begin reading the one about Clayton's, which looks like blueprints and a printed e-mail to Mr. Clayton talking about remodeling and other details as well. I then read the one involving Coping Together and find out that Christian's parents founded it when he was fifteen-years old and that he's contributed to it multiple times in his life. What does this organization have to do with Christian or his family?
I read a few more documents—e-mails, contracts, etc.—then slip them back in the envelope and after placing it on the desk, I notice a small picture frame and after picking it up, I see that it's a black and white photo of a young woman around my age, looking sad and alone. After closer inspection, I realize that she has some similarities to Christian and I know for a fact that it's not his adoptive mother, Grace. Is this his real mother? Why does he have her picture? I put it down and after one last look at my findings, I quietly head out the office, check to make sure no one's looking—it's safe—and make my way out. I head upstairs to my room, the investigation still racing through my head.
Christian Grey; what the hell are you hiding?