A/N: i know this one is shorter, but i got this much done, as well as the last chapter, while i was between internets. I just moved back down to NYC for college foundation year insanity so i KNOW i won't be updating frequently in the future. not that i've been good at it so far but wtvr. i think there might be some OOC here, and this is very unbeta'd as my beta just left for a year in Romania last week, and so isnt around to hellp me. Untill i find a new beta im stuck without. if anyone knows someone.something drop me a line and critique is always welcomed. hope it doesnt suck too bad! 3

Roy woke up that morning with the sun streaming down into his face, only serving to aggravate the headache he felt, a well deserved consequence of the night before. He couldn't remember exactly what it was he had done, but he knew he had gotten a little carried away with the consumption of alcohol, almost guaranteeing that he'd done something stupid. Knowing that, he couldn't handle trying to get up and deal with it right now, whatever it turned out to be. No, he just wanted to stay here, cucooned in his bed, twisted up in warm blankets and soft pillows. Mustang pulled the pillow up over his head to block out the light, fully intending to go straight back to sleep, to put reality away on a high shelf, where he could forget about it and just enjoy his moments of simple happiness.

He felt a form next to him though, and glanced over. he Sighed, he only ever brought his conquests to his own bed if he was really drunk. He didn't like sleeping next to anyone, it opened him up too much, made him too vulnerable for his own liking. Eyes settled on the curve of the form in his bed. There was blonde hair curtained loosely over tanned skin, falling down to cover the face that was pointed away from Roy. He followed the curve of the spine with his eyes, blankets were pulled up to the chin on his companion, curled into a little ball so close to him. Now he would have to deal with the situation, he didn't want the girl sticking around all day.

Roy propped himself up facing his still comatose guest on one elbow, using the other hand to rub his throbbing temples. He hated doing this, kicking the girl out in the morning. There was no nice way to put his sentiments, no way to disguise that he really didn't care for the woman anymore. He extended his hand to shake the girl slightly, intending on waking her up. But his hand jumped when he touched the shoulder in front of him, even through the blankets he could tell that this wasn't right. There was a hard, smooth shape where there should be a soft, warm, feminine one. The jump caused the form beside Roy to stir, and a matching set of arms stretched outwards, one soft and human, the color of desert sand the other hard and metal, a shiny silver curve, an echo of flesh in mechanics. At this movement the blanket fell from the shoulders, pushed down to reveal the junction of flesh and machine at the shoulder. The form looked familiar to Mustang now, he had seen it in his head, worked through this fantasy thousands of times.

Fullmetal? This can't actually be happening. Shit, he thought to himself, This was a very stupid move, bringing him home. I must have had more to drink that I thought. Roy's heart sank in his chest. The flaxen haired boy rolled onto his back, eyes screwed tightly shut, a giant yawn distorting his face. When he closed his mouth he opened his eyes, looking up at Roy's face, catching eye contact and holding it, smiling, till Roy looked away.

"Fullmetal, what are you doing here?" The boy's smile wavered, catching the look of dread in the older man's eyes.

"You don't remember?" Edward pulled himself into sitting position, arranging the blankets on his lap, curling his knees up to wrap his arms around them. He looked a worried for a moment, but forced a smile to his face. "You didn't seem to be asking many questions last night..." Edward raised his eyes again, looking Roy in the face.

The Colonel responded, trying to push some of his normal flippancy into those words, "No Fullmetal, I can only guess why you're here to annoy me first thing in the morning." He was pretty sure he knew what he would have liked to do with Fullmetal in his bed, but he didn't really want to think about that yet. Right now he needed to figure out how far he had fucked this up, and what he could do to fix this. His hand went up to his face, his headache wasn't going away. He really didn't need this this morning.

Edward looked injured for a moment, then he recovered himself. He flipped his legs over the side of the bed, putting his back towards the older man. His hands went up to his face, and for a minute both parties thought he was going to cry, but he bit the tears back. "I'll get out of your hair then, Colonel." The reply was simple, to the point, and the blonde began gathering his clothes from the floor.

X

For once Roy was glad for the stream of paperwork that flowed across his desk, as it gave him something to do besides agonizing over the events of the past night. He didn't know what had happened, but did he know what he had wanted to do to the boy. He had lusted after the blond for so long it had become just another casualty of his life, just another feeling he had to suppress on the road to his goals. Roy shivered. Really, it wasn't something Roy had ever planned on doing, he tried to keep those thoughts at the back of his head, only letting them play when he was alone, at night.

Oh Gods, what have I done? Never in a million years would i have let myself take advantage of him like that. It was a mistake to let myself go like that, I drank too much, and I lost control. Now Im going to have to live with it. Roy let his head fall into his cupped hands, hiding his face. How long until Fullmetal reacts to this? I can see his face now, amber eyes cold with disgust, lips curled in hatred. He'll never trust me again, and he has good reason. This is my fault, how could i have been so weak? He deserves so much better than this, than ME. Roy fully recognized himself as damaged goods.

Mustang rubbed his eyes. He wasn't sure what he could do about this now, there was a rather large possibility that the professional relationship he held with his subordinate would now be broken without repair, and any chance of even the most platonic of personal connections was probably out of the question. All he could do now was call the boy back, apologize, try to set the record straight.

He studied the paper in front of his steadily. He was stalling and he knew it, but he was well and truly frightened, not of the boy himself, though he did still make Roy uncomfortable for obvious reasons, but of the boy's reaction. He would be well within his rights to hate Mustang now, to look spitefully down on him for the moment of weakness he showed. Now Fullmetal knew his secret, he knew how he felt deep down about him. The boy could easily use this against the Colonel now. The administration would most certainly look down on a man such as himself using his rank to take advantage of a younger, and probably drunk subordinate. No, that would not work in his favor.

But those were not the biggest of his fears. What if Edward never forgave him for this? What if he hated him forever, and Mustang never saw him again in his life? That would leave a hole in Mustang, a void in his soul that could never be filled. He would forever be haunted by that night. He cursed his luck. He had risked everything he already had in one drunken swoop for a taste of what his heart had always wanted. The kicker, the part that really made him sick was this: he didn't even remember it, he was too drunk to even have those sweet moments during his inevitable exile. had it been worth it? he would never even know.

X

Edward had tried his best to just forget about the happenings of last night but it wasn't really that easy. He had been doing fine until he'd run into Feury on his way out of the library, who told him the Colonel was looking for him. Edward had no desire to go see that man, especially after this morning. He could deal with their rendevoux last night, in fact if he was to be completely honest with himself he would have to admit that he had enjoyed himself imensly. And now all it had taken was the mention of the bastard's name and the memories came to him unbidden. he remembered the soft touch of the mans lips, this insistant trail of his fingers along the boy's spine, the hot wet breath in his ear, saying words the boy had believed so thoughroughly at the time. Mustang had put him under his spell, he'd pulled the boy into his web and then he'd dropped him as soon as it was convinient.

Edward's stomach still sunk when he remembered this morning, how he had almost cried when Mustang had kicked him out. He had opened himself up to a single person besides his brother, and he had been hurt because of it. Well I guess thats what I get for being so trusting, Ed thought, as he took the steps to Central Headquarters slowly, not in any sort of a hurry to actually get to the Colonel. That Bastard. When he saw him, he would definitly kick the man's ass, he deserved it. But he could'nt tell the man why he was angry, and he knew it. That would just be opening the door wider, asking for another dagger in his side. Edward could almost hear Mustang's mocking response echoing in his head.

Surely you didnt expect me to feel anything towards you Fullmetal. You're just a kid, albeit a useful one at times. And besides, its not like its a secret, but you're damaged goods, in more ways than one. You're half metal, for fucks sake! No, do you know how drunk I was last night? It would have have to be pretty goddamn drunk to drag a wreck like you home with me. Honestly Fullmetal, I'd have thought you were smarter than that.

Ed was snapped from his masochistic fantasy by a voice very close to him. "Edward? Are you okay?" It was Hawkeye, carrying an armload of folders into the office, which Edward had reached without noticing.

"Yeah ... yeah im fine. Just a little tired still I guess" he smiled weakly. Hawkeye sighed.

"Everyone's a little off today, Im pretty sure almost everyone overdid it a little at the party last night. Its a wonder no body did anything they'd regret in the morning." Ed flinched at that. He knew at least two people had done something they regretted, and he only regretted not leaving earlier.

X

It was almost two in the afternoon before he saw Ed. Mustang hadn't really been looking forwards to the inevitably loud and messy confrontation, now that the blonde was awake and sober. But he did know that it had to happen. He had to know exactly what he, they, had done last night, if the boy remembered that is. He hoped to god he didn't, then he could pass it off as anything but what it was. And if the blonde did remember, well he'd have to take up damage control, see what he could salvage from the wreckage that would surely be there. When he finally showed himself Roy knew it was Ed at the door by the way the entrant never stoped walking, only pausing long enough to kick the door open hard before entering.

"What do you want, Bastard?" After slaming the door behind him, Ed stood before the desk, arms crossed over his chest. His stance, the fire in his eyes, and the venom in his words made the Colonel flinch a bit, even if it was the closest to normal he'd seen the younger alchemist in awhile. He forced a smirk to his face, forced his normal mask of sarcasm to his voice.

"How splendid of you to join me finaly Fullmetal, Please, sit down." Roy folded his hands in front of his face, motioning to a chair in front of the desk. "I need to have a little talk with you ... its about the events of last night." He saw Edward blush a bit, but the anger didn't leave his eyes, or the set of his jaw. He did however, move to sit down. this could take awhile. Shit, he remembers everything, thought Roy, I can see it in his face.

"As you are probably aware, I was pretty damn drunk last night. I need to know exactly what happened then, Fullmetal, what happened ... between us." The last part was a little bit more difficult for Roy to actually say. It was pushing all the chips into Edward's court, admiting that he hadn't been in controll and he knew it. Edward's face didnt show any relief though. The boy's golden eyes dropped to the floor, though the anger writ in his face did not fade. It did still make Mustang jump though, when Fullmetal stood, slaming his automail hand onto The older alchemist's desk.

"You know what happened last night, Mustang" he hissed between clenched teeth, "Hell, even if you didn't after waking up this morning i bet you could take a pretty damn good guess, don't you think?" That response didn't help him very much, but he knew not to push it any further. There was anger like steel behind Fullmetal's words, and pushing him much farther would break it out into the open.

"Fullmetal, please contain yourself. Sit back down." The boy grumbled a little but retreated to his seat, still steeled with emotion, but a little flushed from his outburst. "Now I need to know if the events of last night are going to affect you here, in a professional capacity." His eyes met Edward's, waiting for a response but getting only silence, gritted teeth, and a slight shake of the head. he would take this as a no.

"Thats good to know Fullmetal, because I'd hate to think a mistake like that would put either of our Military careers in jeopardy." Mustang straightened the papers in front of him, and re-folded his hands. It took a minute for it to register for him that Edward was shaking slighly.

"Is that all it was to you? some drunken misstep?" the words were quiet, the boys eyes pointed to the desktop, avoiding mustang's own. But there was still that edge of steel.

"Come on, honestly, we were both more than a little bit drunk, and we had a lapse in judjement, thats all. Under normal circumstances im sure you would never have considered such a thing." Roy said, tacking a quick "and neither would I" on the end, almost as an afterthought. The words made the boy want to be sick, he came close to crying once more, but he held the composure on his face remarkably well considering. The words coming out of Mustang's mouth now sounded so much like what he feared they would be. do you know how drunk I was last night? It would have have to be pretty goddamn drunk to drag a wreck like you home with me. He could still hear those echoes, brought back by the man himself.

Edward stood, and walked to the door, putting his flesh hand on the knob. But he stopped there, he could feel the Colonel's eyes on his back. He knew the man would let him go, let him walk out the door without saying anything. Ed turned his head, looking at the man over his shoulder.

"You may have been drunk off your ass, Bastard, but I wasn't. I was there because I wanted to be." He turned to face the door again, turning the knob to let himself out. "Don't worry yourself over it though. Im a big boy, I know how things work now." And with that he exited, shutting the door behind him leaving Mustang honestly not sure what to do.