A/N: So Im really ticked off because I had this whole chapter all typed out and finished, ready to save and accidentally closed out before saving so I had to write this from memory which isn't very good compared to what I had. Scream. A little word of advice to fellow writers: Don't have 'accidents' or 'mistakes'.
To those who review I love you guys!
Casey and Emily both began following the mob of high school students to the auditorium. Casey would pass Sam outside Mrs. Marsh's class on the way there. Why did he have to plan something tonight of all nights? Why did she have to have a headache, it was hard to focus already?
Emily was explaining that she was going to Amber's with Jessica. Somebody stepped on her heels. She turned to see another mob behind her. This assembly wasn't such a bad idea. She wouldn't have to worry about being distracted in the rest of her classes. And she could rehearse how she would say bye to Derek. Derek...how can I do this?
Never again would she be able to express that she loves him. She would never again experience him doing the same. All I will have is the memory. I remember his tender voice, his fervent fingers, his erotic lips, and his eyes of adoration.
I've played that moment again and again in my mind never wanting to forget because I need it to carry on. Unfortunately this like all memories will fade. Then I will be left with nothing, her thoughts said in quiet solemn.
Calm down. Just don't lose sight of why this has to be. Stay Strong, she motivated herself. But Im not that strong, she whined. I could never do that to him. I couldn't do that to myself. Casey placed her hand on her stomach feeling languid. Emily was still speaking, but she couldn't hear what.
She felt like she was going to drop and the horde from behind would trample her. Casey saw a door, a means to escape, and jumped at the chance. She quickly opened the door, walked in, and closed it. Relief overwhelmed her as her hands fumbled for the light switch.
As light swallowed the darkness, Casey saw that she was in the art supply closet. It was cold and the air tasted of crayons. The door handle turned and the door opened. Her eyes panicked hoping a teacher hadn't caught her. She wished in the next moment that it had been, as Derek entered.
P.S. So you think I'm gonna go cliché on you. Well you're wrong.
"What would you be doing in here Casey?" he asked almost in his trademark leer.
She could feel her self-restraint melting so she answered bluntly walking to the door he stood in front of, "Leaving."
"You and Sam decide to skip the festivities and make-out in here?" he asked hiding his anguish at the thought.
"No Derek that's something you would do. Not Sam." she replied sharply.
"Yeah I remember this specific closet," he said looking around it. "Good times, Good times."
Casey scoffed and reached for the door handle. "We need to go to the assembly."
Derek leaned back against the door. She wondered if he could see how much she had missed him.
"All day you've been so cold to me," he said trying to get through to her.
She didn't want to argue with him. "I told you not now."
"When are you going to quit running and just talk to me?" he almost begged.
"We're going to get in trouble." she verbally pushed.
"I'm tired of waiting Case. If you don't explain it to me now the next time I see Sam all over you I'm gonna pound the mother-fuc-er." he said trying to constrain his anger.
Casey was a little shocked and hesitated. "I just didn't want to discuss this at school. I was waiting for the right time tonight."
"I love you Case. And I thought you said you loved me too. So why are you with him?"
he asked exasperated.
"Because Derek I can't--" He saw where this was going and he interrupted not wanting to hear it.
"I know what you're thinking," he said softly, barely breathing.
"I can't pretend that I'm your stepsister and then turn around and...I can't do that to our family. I would never be able to look in my mom's eyes. I won't sacrifice that much."
"I don't want to hear your reasons. Don't give me that 'our family' shit." His hands covered his face.
"Sometimes I lose myself with you and can forget the world, but not for long because we live in it. How can being with you be okay with all the conflict I'm going through?"
Casey placed her hand on his shoulder. He dropped his hands and she saw his unmistakable misery.
He walked to the other side of the closet and she turned to look at him.
"I think you understand that this is the way it has to be." she spoke calmly.
"Don't do this. You're making a mistake. You're ruining everything!"
Two tears slid down Casey's cheek. It was unbearable for her to watch his affliction.
"I thought we discussed and resolved this. I guess I expected a little too much from you. I was so damn gullible!" he released his outrage.
He put his hand around the back of her head cradling it. His voice broke. "Why did you do that Casey? Why did you let me leave your room last night thinking we could be together only to change your fucking mind the next day?"
She sobbed. He watched her apathetically drinking up her tears and sob. It was her turn to feel salt in her wounds, he thought.
"I'm sorry Derek." she said almost unintelligibly.
She took a deep breathe to speak distinctly. "I wasn't thinking clearly and then I spent all night thinking how inappropriate it would be."
He wasn't tugging, but he had a hold on her hair. "Yes you wouldn't be Casey if you weren't a rigid self-righteous bitch."
He spoke harshly and Casey felt the sting as more tears filled her eyes. She pushed him off her. He didn't fight her.
"It's better than being a selfish, egotistic, philanderer!" she yelled vehemently.
"It's kind of hard to meet your high standards, when we are all so far from you." he cruelly spit out.
"When making a choice, do you at least consider anyone else's feelings or is yours all that matters?"
"After everything that's what you think. You don't know me at all." he said bitterly.
Her headache now felt more like a gash to the head. "That's the way your acting, Derek." she sobbed.
"Because I don't want to let you go. Then yeah I'm guilty as charged. Whatever it takes to be with you." he said piercingly.
She folded her arms and looked towards the floor. He reached over and brushed away her tears. She didn't give any indication that she felt it. He moved closer to her. His lips were barely touching hers. There was nothing Casey wanted more. His amorous eyes begged her to surrender.
"Please no Derek," she stammered. She watched as his eyes darkened.
He released her and callously muttered, "Fine go on. To hell with our life."
He walked past her and out the door, shutting it behind him. Casey dropped to the floor and continued to weep. After five minutes surprisingly, she had no tears left and wiped her face with her jacket sleeve. She didn't feel like getting up and just wanted to lie down. She lay on her side. The floor was very hard. The pain in her head consumed her. The bottle of aspirin was in her locker. Casey told herself she didn't need it, not wanting to move, but the migraine demanded that she did need it.
She picked herself up and turned to the door to see Derek.
"I didn't want to leave you alone." he quietly explained stoically. His right fist was red and she thought she saw some blood. He must have took out his anger on something out in the halls before returning.
She almost began crying again, but was able to suppress it. Casey still needed the Tylenol so she walked to the door. He moved so she could pass him.
Derek spoke gravely "You think us 'inappropriate', but you're wrong Case."
She looked into his gentle eyes and he continued in his almost baleful tone, "You can linger in your sorrow and like to think that Sam will erase your love for me. It won't happen because the truth is your mine."