Drabbles created for the Klaroween Bingo Event
Prompt: The Ghoul Next Door
Body bags do not prevent freezer burn. With a huff of annoyance, Caroline continued dragging the body into the woods, pleased that the moonless night provided the perfect cover for her cleanup activities. She normally did a better job monitoring her food storage by correctly labeling each corpse and stacking them in chronological order in her walk-in freezer, but Alaric had been problematic from the moment he moved in next door.
Within moments of introducing himself, he eyed her up and down and told her that she was the 'perfect candidate to bear his children'. Flabbergasted, she realized Alaric was completely oblivious as to why his proposition was wildly inappropriate — even if she had been human. She belonged to an ancient race whose roots could be traced back to Mesopotamia. Her tribe, the Siduri, required an elaborate blood magic ritual for a female to become fertile, and she seriously doubted that this sad little creeper would be willing to sacrifice one of his testicles over an open flame while ingesting the blood of a freshly slaughtered jackal.
Not that she'd be willing to mate with him even if he survived the ritual. Underneath his foul odors of desperation and expired lunchmeat, she detected a genetic disorder that could be passed along to his progeny. Definitely not an ideal mate. Not that she had time for children at the moment — she'd just gotten her wine bar started and the stress was making her molt more than usual. Between both of her hostesses quitting during opening week and her distributor accidentally switching her painstakingly crafted, oak-aged merlot cases with cheap, candy cane-sweet white zinfandel, it had been a particularly trying time.
So, Caroline had been binge-eating a bit more than usual, and Alaric happened to catch her chowing down on her favorite comfort food — fried ears sprinkled with ghost pepper sea salt. She could hear his heart pounding, but her supernatural reflexes allowed her to snap his neck just as he opened his mouth to scream. She'd been so aggravated, she'd tossed his stiffening corpse into a spare body bag and shoved him into her enormous freezer without another thought. She hadn't thought about him again until she was performing her monthly freezer cleanout. As much as she'd like to toss him in the garbage with her disastrous attempt at marinated belly button chili, she couldn't afford to have his disappearance tied back to her, so here she was, digging a hole for this jackass in the middle of the woods.
That first shovelful told her the forest was mostly rock, and she grimaced as she realized the thin topsoil would do a crappy job of covering up Alaric's corpse. She was going to be here all night.
"First body dump, love," drawled an accented voice in amusement.
Caroline stiffened — it had been ages since another creature had caught her by surprise. She studied the attractive man with suspicion, his dimples cutting into his high cheekbones as he noted the intensity of her gaze. "Hardly," she scoffed, allowing a hint of her true age to bleed into her blue eyes as she gestured to the shredded, bloody mess in a pile beside his boots, "and are you always such a messy eater?"
"My wolf is relatively new to the hunt," he offered with an enigmatic smile.
Taking in his enticing scent, she hummed in understanding, "You're a hybrid. One of the older ones, I assume?" It makes him far less breakable. The seductive little voice in the back of her mind made her blush, and she wondered if he could smell her sudden arousal.
Stepping toward her with a predatory smirk that she found strangely appealing, he replied, "Klaus Mikaelson, the Original hybrid." Cocking his head to study her closely, he observed, "And you're a ghoul. I must confess, sweetheart, I had no idea your kind came in such enticing packages."
Leaning against her shovel handle, she warned him with a low hiss, "It's 'Caroline', not 'sweetheart'. And I swear, if you make one grave-robbing Igor reference, I'll bury you right next to my pervy stalker."
Gray eyes lighting up in amusement, he held up his hands in surrender. "My apologies, Caroline. Is it safe to assume that your unfortunate lad's foolish persistence led to his demise?"
"Well, that and he'd already pissed me off by propositioning me to be his baby incubator," Caroline growled, landing a satisfying kick against Alaric's head. "Seriously, the more time I spend in the human world, the more surprised I am that their females haven't burned it to the ground." Nodding at the bloody mess of flesh and freshly cracked femurs on the ground beside him, she asked, "So what did yours do to piss you off?"
Shrugging, Klaus revealed, "He attempted to steal my family. However, the moment he touched the first coffin, the warding magic stopped him. I generously gave him a sporting chance, but my wolf easily tracked him through the woods. The scent of repetitive, pointless angst and hair gel is unmistakable."
She laughed along with him, finding his morbid sense of humor quite charming. "It hadn't occurred to me to try coffins for food storage — do you think they'd prevent freezer burn better than body bags," she asked him curiously.
Raising an eyebrow, Klaus folded his fingers around her shovel handle, lightly grazing her knuckles. "I've never had a reason to find out. It just so happens that I have a few coffins lying around. Why don't we tidy up here a bit and then we can find out together, hmmm?"
Enjoying the way his hybrid warmth stoked a sensual fire in her cool flesh, Caroline boldly stroked the handle, favoring him with an impish wink as she purred, "Perfect. We can see if I have a lovely cabernet that pairs well with angst and hair gel."
Prompt: The Rocky Horror Picture Show
It was the perfect way to hide in plain sight. No one would ever suspect that the local musical production of The Rocky Horror Picture Show was made up entirely of vampires. They could be as weird and creepy as they liked and the audience ate it up (and later on, the actors might return the favor).
However, as director, Caroline ran a tight ship and expected her actors to abide by several non-negotiable rules including healing after biting.
For the most part, her actors behaved themselves, but if she had to warn Enzo and Kol one more time about leaving their meals tied up in their fishnets, she was going to banish them from the stage and make them man the ticket booth.
And then, there was Klaus. Beautiful, arrogant Klaus who awakened in her a fetish for men dressed in leather corsets and heels that she hadn't even known she possessed. She was hooked from the first moment he sang in that delicious accent, "Give yourself over to absolute pleasure. Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh — erotic nightmares beyond any measure, and sensual daydreams to treasure forever. Can't you just see it? Don't dream it, be it."
She wondered if his bedroom eyes on stage could translate into something even hotter backstage…
Prompt: Pumpkin
"Lucy is my spirit animal," Caroline cheerfully told Klaus, adding more cinnamon to their cider.
Raising an eyebrow, he watched the television with a bemused expression. "Watching cartoon children worship a fictional pumpkin deity is how you celebrate this holiday?"
"The Peanuts gang doesn't worship The Great Pumpkin," she protested, "Well, maybe Linus," she amended.
Settling more comfortably against the couch, Klaus pulled Caroline closer to him as he mused, "I approve of Linus. His faith in this fictional pumpkin deity is admirable. He would've made a loyal minion."
Prompt: Spiderweb
[This is a prequel to Chapters 49 & 50 - The Tangled Web.]
"Did you seriously think you could pass off a crappy paper-mache disco ball instead of the glittering mirror ball I specifically instructed you to pick up from the party supply store before they closed," Caroline snarled at one of the useless dance committee members, sending them scurrying for the correct supplies. Clapping her hands at the remaining volunteers covering the benches with gold and burgundy velvet, she announced, "People! The theme of the fall dance is Studio 54 — the embodiment of glamour and excess! I expect every trace of these tacky streamers taken down before you leave tonight!"
Grumbling, she rubbed her forehead, realizing that part of her irritation stemmed from hunger. She hadn't had a proper meal in several days with the gang on high alert trying to plot against Klaus and prevent him from using Elena in his creepy ritual. It was really difficult to sneak off to her hideout for a snack when the Mystic Falls gang was so paranoid these days. The last thing she needed was them to find out her family secret after she'd been so careful. She wondered if she could take a detour through the woods on the way home and snag some chewy millipedes or spicy fire ants.
Caroline continued adding the gold bulbs to the large '54' sign, stretching to reach the top row. She only pretended to be using the tall ladder as her kind was very adept at climbing, but it was important to keep up appearances. However, she nearly lost her footing when a familiar voice called out in amusement, "Do you need some assistance, love?"
"Not from you," she said as she glared down at Klaus, mildly alarmed that he may have observed how her toes weren't quite connecting with the ladder steps as she dangled from the wall. Damn it. So far, she'd been able to keep up the facade of humanity around the pesky Original, especially since he seemed more interested in his upcoming ritual, but she noticed he'd been coming around more lately, and she wasn't sure what to think. Perhaps she'd eat him. "Shouldn't you be terrorizing Elena and her faithful Muppet sidekicks, Bert and Ernie?"
Klaus chuckled, his accent sending a pleasurable shiver down her spine as he replied, "You aren't a fan of the Salvatores then, sweetheart? We have that in common." His gray sparkled with mischief as he added seductively, "I'm most curious to learn what else we may have in common."
"Nothing," Caroline answered sharply, "you're a terrifying immortal vampire who wants to use Elena like a juice box to unlock your inner Chihuahua and I'm a stressed-out human who needs to finish decorating this gym so I can get to my calculus homework." She used her enhanced vision to read the micro expressions on Klaus' handsome face. So far, he appeared to be amused with her — not suspicious. Good.
Holding out his hand to her he said, "That's an awfully long way up, sweetheart. Wouldn't you be more comfortable down here where we can chat properly?"
Caroline rolled her eyes at his terrible attempts at flirting. "Heights have never been a problem for me," she answered flatly, but took his hand anyway, resisting the urge to show him just how strong she really was. Her finger joints were like steel, one of the attributes of her species that enabled them to climb great heights and spin their webs. Just a tiny bit of pressure and she could break the arrogant Original's hand. Just imaging his surprise made her smile, but she found him to be a fun diversion and didn't want to cause him harm unless necessary.
She allowed him to lead her toward the main stage, leaning against the white horse she'd borrowed from the theater department to study the Original more closely. His lean, powerful frame was more appealing than she cared to admit, and she enjoyed the way he brushed back his dirty blonde curls when wanted to draw her attention to him. The bits of humanity she occasionally spied within him were fun to see, and she found herself wondering what he was like beneath the cocky swagger.
Eyeing the horse, Klaus observed, "You've impressed me with the level of detail put into your dance theme, love. Tell me, will you be dressing as Bianca Jagger and riding the horse to make your entrance?"
Caroline scoffed, "Let me guess — this is the part where you impress me with a story about how you were at Studio 54 for her birthday when she arrived on the white horse?"
Threading his fingers through the strands of silver and gold beaded curtains beside them, he smirked, "Not quite, sweetheart. You're far too clever to fall for my typical stories of adventures throughout the centuries. Although, if you're ever interested in viewing artwork and other artifacts of historical importance that you won't find in museums, well, you know where to find me," he finished with a roguish wink that left her a bit breathless.
Noticing that the banner she'd hung earlier was slightly crooked, she mentally calculated how much silk she'd need to spin into a sticky spiderweb to do a quick fix without any of the volunteers noticing. "So, you took time out from gathering your spooky ritual ingredients to confess to me that you're a hoarder?"
Dimples cutting into his cheeks, Klaus ducked his curly head almost shyly as he told her, "Actually, I stopped by to tell you that I know my doppelganger is attending your event and I'll be chaperoning to ensure the Salvatores don't do anything ill-advised. I was hoping you would save me a dance."
Mildly surprised, Caroline recovered quickly, favoring him with a wicked grin as she said, "I could be persuaded — especially if you happen to have some vintage Halston in your creepy collection I can borrow."
Prompt: Horrible Horror Movie Marathon
"Would never happen, love," Klaus told Caroline, shaking his head as he snorted at the television screen where the movie's title card flashed at them. "No amount of dark magic will resurrect human ashes mixed with gingerbread spices — no matter how evil the soul in question might be," he added with a smirk.
Rolling her eyes, she grabbed another handful of popcorn, munching slowly as she considered something. Blue eyes suddenly alight with mischief, she conceded, "Fine. I'll give you that one, but you and I both know the leprechaun thing could totally happen." At his skeptical expression she hurriedly said, "Ok, maybe not the space part, but we both know the rest could be true."
"That layover in Galway, then we drank our way through that distillery and got lost in the woods and found..." he trailed off meaningfully, pleased that she'd agreed to keep that unexpected 'little' discovery one of their secrets.
With a sigh of contentment, she leaned against him, pulling the soft blanket closer as she changed the channel. A surprised chuckle escaped her when she saw possibly the most ridiculous plot idea for a horror movie ever. "No way. No way can that even remotely happen, right?"
Looking down at her, his expression turned contemplative as he said, "Well, sweetheart, while it wasn't exactly a snowman, there was the time Kol ran afoul of an Icelandic coven who enjoyed making living ice sculptures of men whom they felt betrayed them..."
"Pics or it didn't happen," she cheerfully told him with a quick kiss. When he changed the channel again, she shivered when she recognized the movie. "Now that one I know is real. One time, Enzo and I drove up the East Coast because I wanted to see the leaves change colors and then there was an epic pub crawl, and then one thing led to another and suddenly the townsfolk were trying to sacrifice us to their pumpkin deity." At Klaus' hilariously stunned expression, she shrugged, smiling at the memory as she confessed, " Best. Pie. Ever."
