Chapter 38: Goodbye to the Dream

Hey look, it's the New Year's Eve chapter! I hope you enjoy reading this one ^^


Sonika and Gumi's house~~~

Normal POV

Sonika and Gumi greet their guests, one at the door of the house and another outside. Since Sonika is the most outgoing of the two, she walks around and provides small talk to her friends and classmates. Many of them have stopped asking what happened to her during that week that she left school, but as for those who continue to ask, she gives them the same old answer with a fake smile.

"I wasn't feeling so good that week. There was so much stress with all my failing grades, and Len broke up with me…things just weren't going right…"

By that time, they usually give her comforting words and let her know that they missed her dearly. She simply shakes her head and smiles, thanking them for their courtesy. Their eyes leave her as she tells them to enjoy themselves and eat some refreshments either inside where it's warm or outside where the scenery is nice.

Sonika heaves out a sigh and combs a hand through her now light brown hair. Looking back at their front door, she sees a pair of worried green eyes making sure she is okay. She flashes her sister a reassuring smile and walks up to the new people arriving. As she is about to say hello, she sees Len in the bunch. He's carelessly teasing Rin and pinching her cheek while her grip tightens on the cup in her hands.

All of that happened…just because of him?

Shaking her head, she continues to the group and greets them with a smile.

"Welcome to our New Year's Eve party. I hope you can enjoy yourselves tonight," she says as they look around.

"Thank you for having us here. You and Gumi have a beautiful house," Rin compliments as her eyes are awed from the scenery. Her friends agree, Teto's compliments more vocal than theirs.

"Hey look! There's Leon and Lola!" Teto yells and points at the couple.

Lola notices Teto pointing and starts running towards her, dragging Leon behind with her crushing hand-hold. When she finally reaches her, she lets go of Leon and the two glomp into each other, bumping into a familiar and not-so-liked blonde. Neru screams from the surprise attack and flails her arms around to try to catch her cell phone before it hits the ground.

"I'm so sorry that I hit you, Neru!" Lola apologizes over as she gives her hand out to the blonde. Neru sneaks a glance at Oliver who is watching and accepts the hand, where otherwise she'd slap it away and get up, insisting that she was okay, due to her tsundere nature. Instead, she grabs the hand and stands up.

"It's okay," Neru says and forces a smile, which makes Teto eye her.

"Akita…"

"Kasane…"

"I didn't know Sonika let dogs come to her party."

"Well, she let you in, didn't she?"

"Who wouldn't let this awesomeness in?"

Neru snorts as Teto bounces her twin tails. "Whatever."

Once noticing Oliver, Neru grabs his hand and pulls him aside, saying loud enough for Teto to hear, "Come on Oliver, we have much to talk about."

"O-okay," Oliver agrees as he looks down at her hand, blushing like crazy.

"One day I'm going to push her into a pool again," Teto grumbles under her breath and walks off to go talk with Gumi and Miki.


Miki's POV~~~

I've had a stone lying in my stomach since the day began. I was thinking about it last night, when talking to SoundlessVoice09. We usually end up saying late to talk to each other, and sometimes we fall asleep in the process. It's kinda sweet, I think. Oddly enough though, he seems off lately. We haven't talked as much.

But although I have these strong feelings for SoundlessVoice09, I can't stop burning up with Piko is around. I've never taken myself as the kind of girl who would be talk to two boys at once. Is it bad to do this? Maybe I don't even like one of them, but I just enjoy the attention. Am I really as bad as those untrustworthy girls?

But then again, Piko and SoundlessVoice09 could be the same person. There are so many clues to show me the way, and yet I've turned a blind eye to them all. I'm a good riddler, so why haven't I been able to solve this riddle?

If I know one thing, it's that I shouldn't beat around the bushes. If I have a question, I must come out and ask it.

I zone back to Teto's and Gumi's conversation, silently sipping punch as I eye the entrance of their house. When Piko arrives, I will surely find a time to ask him.


Aito's POV~~~

"Kaito, how much ice-cream do you insist on eating?"

Luka giggles as she watches Kaito set aside a third empty carton of ice-cream. "Do you eat when you're nervous or something?"

"Nervous, happy, sad, sick, all the time," Kaito says and laughs, engulfing yet another spoonful.

I've been trying to talk to Luka all day, but all her attention is directed towards Kaito. And yet, I watch those two idiots laugh and talk about casual things as I feel more uneasy by the second. Finally, I force myself to walk off.

If I'm going to confess, I shouldn't let myself get in a bad mood.

I walk over to Rin, who's glaring at Len and a group of mousy girls standing around him. I can tell from the pile of ripped napkins around her that she's not happy. I pull up a chair and sit beside her, watching Len lift up a girl's chin and smile at her.

"And just when I thought he was getting over this immature need to flirt with anything that moves," Rin mutters and sighs, turning her attention to me. "Sorry about that, Aito. How are you?"

"Annoyed as well," I answer. "Luka's drool for Kaito is drowning me."

"You haven't gotten to talk to her yet?" Rin asks and I shake my head.

"She's too busy laughing at Kaito's stupid jokes."

"I feel your pain, bro," Rin says, jokingly tapping her heart. I laugh and she smiles. "You shouldn't let it get you in a bad mood. By the end of your night, you're going to tell Luka your feelings and then she'll realize her feelings for you too."

"Are you sure though? If she really liked me, wouldn't she know by now?"

"Sometimes, when we're focused on someone too much," she says and gestures at Kaito, "we don't look at what else happens around us. And sometimes you need to be jolted awake for you to realize your feelings for someone."

"You really think that?"

She studies me for a bit and nods. I know I can always count on Rin to help me with my problems.

"You're a great friend, Rin," I say. "I'm sorry for all I've put you through."

Rin stays quiet from the words and scratches her neck. Maybe that wasn't a good thing to say… I mean, we've never talked about what happened when we were dating. Maybe she's sensitive to that?

Before I can reply, she smiles and says, "No problem, Aito."

I wonder, did her smile change? They always used to seem a little forced, like she was annoyed to always be helping me with Luka. But this smile, it's genuine, I think.

"I would do anything for my friends."


Normal POV~~~

"And that's when Ted decided to give in and just buy me bags full of bread!"

Teto laughs and grabs another piece of bread from her plate. "Gumi, you sure know me well. And for a second I doubted that there would be bread here!"

"My mother asked me why I wanted so much," Gumi says and laughs. "She thought I was making a castle with them or something."

"How much bread do you consume a day?" Oliver asks, staring at the endless hole Teto calls her stomach.

"Bread is good for the soul, I always say." She laughs and gestures some to him. "Here have some."

Oliver leans back as it brushes across his lips. "I can feed myself! I'm not a baby!"

"Right, you're a shota," Teto teases and pushes the bread to his lips again. "Eat!"

"Teto!"

"Come on! You need bread to grow big and strong, shota!"

Miki and Gumi watch as Teto pins Oliver down and teases him just as Neru does from her group of friends. She growls and excuses herself, walking over to them.

"Excuse me, but I need to talk with my boyfriend," Neru states.

"Kinda a little busy here," Teto says, ignoring her request and laughing at Oliver.

Neru forcefully grabs Oliver's wrist and pulls him up. "Let's let Oliver decide who he wants to go with."

Teto grabs his other wrist and stands up. "Fine. Oliver, tell the Kraken that you want to stay here and actually have fun."

"Ha, you're so funny," Neru says and Teto sticks her tongue out. "Oliver, decide."

"Oliver, I'm your best friend!"

"I'm you're girlfriend!"

"Oliver-"

Neru cuts in by placing a kiss on Oliver's lips and grabbing his shoulders to give an even more passionate one. Teto gasps and makes motions that she's going to throw up. Miki and Gumi glance at each other, wondering how long she can go.

Finally, Neru pulls her lips away from him and pulls him along. "Come on Oliver, you can get more of that somewhere private."

"Bye guys," Oliver mumbles with a dazed look on his face, drunk from the kiss.

"Oliver, you freaking traitor!"

Teto sighs in defeat and sits down. "I hate her guts."

As she pulls out her phone and texts IA about the problem, Gumi looks over at Aito, who's still conversing with Rin.

Hm, has he stopped trying to talk to Luka? Gumi wonders.

Aito rubs his forehead after Rin throws a cookie at him, faking a hurt puppy dog face. Gumi smiles as she bites down on a sugar cookie.

He's so cute…


Len's POV~~~

"Ah, you like it when I call you 'darling'?"

I smile as the girl blushes and twirls a piece of her hair around her fingers. This kind is always the easiest to grab, and it's my nature to want to flirt. As she giggles and takes a step towards me, I glance over at Rin, who's throwing small cookies at Aito's head. She keeps laughing like she's having the time of her life with him or something. Does she still like him or something? I frown as she smiles at his comment.

It irritates me.


Rin's POV~~~

I look over at Len and see him playing with a girl's hand, writing something with his finger. Is it just going to be like this? Act like nothing happened and go off and flirt with other girls? Even with all that happened this winter break? Those fun times together, the arguments about leaving the toilet lid up, playing in the snow together and that kiss…

I run my hand across my lips absentmindedly as Aito checks his phone.

And what about Mayu? The gun? The chase? When I broke down in front of him again?

Wait…

Did he hear my confession?

It's going to come any second now. I can feel the my anxiety rising high. All the things I never got to do, and all the people I've never taken the time to sit down with and tell them how important they are to me...Why have I been wasting my time being so ungrateful? I want to let it all out. Please let me speak my last confession. Let my voice explode along with the gun shot!

"I love you, Len!"

.

.

.

The three loud noises collide together. My yell, the gun shot, and...was that Mayu's scream?

My thoughts…I thought I had them sorted out. At the beginning of the year, I loved Aito. I had never spoken to a "Len Kagamine". I was just friends with Luka and Aito, and I didn't stick out much. I was always known as that odd girl in class who didn't really speak much, and when she did, she was most likely to creep people out. The girl who looks like she should be in a middle school classroom, that's me.

That girl, all she wanted was to keep her friends together and for Aito like her back.

And what about the me now?

I frown as Len smiles at the girl's tease.

It irritates me.


Normal POV~~~

Forcefully grabbing his collared shirt, Neru pulls Oliver to her level and starts licking the bottom of his lip, requesting entrance. And Oliver oh-so-happily grants her permission, shivering as a hand slides up the back of his shirt. He can feel the cool air come in from the space.

Panting, Oliver finds his back now against the house's brick wall. Her tongue slips and slides across his, across his entire mouth and makes him want to savor each second. She pulls out with a content sigh and his golden orbs look at her as if she betrayed him. His body was practically screaming, begging for more.

Then, her lips connect with his neck, leaving small love bites claiming him as hers. It was embarrassing for her to do such a thing, but high vocals kept leaving his mouth. Deciding to do something daring as well, his hands slide down the small of her back. When she bites a little too roughly, he squeals and brings her body closer, eliminating any space.

Her shirt is slowly being lifted by the movements, and Oliver doesn't exactly know how he feels about that. Each suck, each lick, each moan, each pull, each kiss… Oliver is slowly losing his mind. He feels like all the sense in his head has gone down to lower regions.

"What a fucking wh-"

"Teto!" Gumi gasps as Teto bites down on her lip, drawing out blood. She doesn't even wince and rejects Gumi's offer of a napkin. She sees the couple finally pulling away, twitching when she sees thin visible strands of saliva connecting them from their panting, hot breath.

She slams herself down on her seat, pulling out her phone and contacting IA. With every letter, she mutters a curse word against Neru under her breath. Her thumb crushes the send button and she pulls out her "Plan Book" from her yellow cardigan pocket.

'There has to be a plan in here…'

The cell-phone vibrates on the table, demanding attention from the text by IA.

'Calm down Teto- you're going to end up doing something you regret if you act out of spite.'

"Like damn I will. But I don't care," Teto says to herself, causing her two friends to look at each other again. It's always scary when Teto gets mad because you don't know what kind of plans she has in mind. She would always text someone, they don't know who, and then shortly after something crazy would happen. Is the person a secret source of information? One of her "minions"?

Teto stands up, grabbing their attention once more. "If you ladies will excuse me, I am off to the bathroom."

As she walks away, Gumi gulps loudly.

"This won't end well."


Teto's POV~~~

If there's anything that you must know for devious plans, it's that you can't leave any evidence behind that shows that you caused it. Look for a weak point where no one is paying attention and attack it immediately.

Like Len and Rin arguing.

"So I see you spent half your night flirting up girls, huh?" Rin comments as Len sits beside her. Aito left a while ago, so Len took his chance.

"You've been watching me?" Len laughs and cocks an eyebrow.

Rin snorts. "Everyone can feel your crazy, unrestrained hormones."

"Flirting is just something fun to do. It's casual and it's entertaining for both parties," Len says and she rolls her eyes once more.

"It's disrespectful to do that to so many girls."

"What do you know?" Len snaps, making Rin give him a cold glare. She stands up and walks away, not wanting to get into an argument. As she walks off, he curses himself under his breath for acting on impulse. Finally, an opening!

I peek out from under the table and grab a stray piece of cake on the table. Stupid Len doesn't seem to notice my hand. Len looks up at Rin and calls her name, standing up.

"Hey, Rin!"

As she turns around, I throw the cake with all my might, letting it land straight on her sheer shirt. Her face goes red with anger, watching as the icing slides off and down to her flats.

"LEN!"

"It wasn't me! I promise!"

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Rin's hands clamp down on the nearest food around her- another piece of cake- and shoves it into his hair. A finger slices off a piece of icing and smudges across his lips, letting him get a taste of her sweet revenge.

"Aw, Rin, that's so sweet of you."

Glancing at his overly sweet smile, she eyes the punch close to him and grabs his hand before he can grasp it. The two pull back and forth, trying to keep the liquid in the glass, but it spills over the two. Unfortunately for them, the hand slips from their hands and hits Aito's head, interrupting his chat with Gumi.

Oo~ things are about to get interesting!

I slowly crawl out of the table as I hear food being thrown. Some people are yelling for them to stop, but as soon as they get hit it's game on for them. Heck, even Sonika has too much fun slamming a pie onto Len's back.

"I wanna join the fun!" I yell and jump up, grabbing some cupcakes. I spot my target: the ugly sea monster whore and project the sugary goodness to her face and clothes. It smudges across her new glittery dress and ruins her make-up.

"There! Your true self is shown!"

I can feel the vibration of her growl from where I stand. I think it's best I either find more ammo or get a good defense.

"Kasane, I'm going to kill y-"

I don't let her speak, just keep throwing over and over in a comical way. Finally, she throws her high heels off and decides to grab some snacks too. I squeal and grab the person closest to me- Kaito.

"Protect me!"

Neru blindly throws the ice-cream at Kaito's face, but he doesn't seem to mind. "Oh, I love this flavor!"

Ah, this is why you pick idiots as your body guards.

Letting go of his arms, I slide under the table, trying to make myself unnoticeable. It's fun to ruin Neru's night, but I must see what else is going on.

Kaito's screaming from the horror of watching so many people waste ice-cream, Luka's laughing at Aito's brownie covered face, and Gumi is blushing from how gently Aito wiped off any food that got on her, jokingly vowing to protect her. Cupcakes being thrown this side, punch being thrown that side, and smiles spreading as the punch runs down their face, letting go of caring about their appearances and just having fun.

You see? Not only have I managed to make Neru mad, but everyone's having fun now. There's no more of that stiff atmosphere where girls are trying to impress their crushes with their looks or guys are trying too hard to boost their ego or prove that they are good enough. Make-up will be washed off with icing, everyone's clothes will be equal because they're all ruined, and seriously, when you just finished having an epic food fight like that, you don't have to keep up with the fake personality of being feminine or sophisticated.

Job well done, Teto the Goddess.


Normal POV~~~

People are either washing off the sticky food or just talking amongst each other in the dark, watching early fireworks be set off with the stars. Some couples are walking around the forest, holding hands and sweetly sending moonlight kisses. Sonika and Gumi are distracted with others as they turn on the television to watch the countdown. They cheer as a news reporter shows up with a clock behind her.

Less than an hour left before midnight.

Seeing that he's alone, Miki bravely walks up to him and gives him a small smile. "I didn't think you were coming."

Piko just nods, his mind in an island. Seeing his dry stare, Miki coughs and clears her throat.

This is so awkward…

"Can I ask you something?"

Finally, he looks at her and she can see waves of curiosity breaching over the shore of his island. Suddenly receiving a chill from the cold, her mouth clamps down. Seems like the sand has traveled over to her tongue. She wishes for liquid, for the ocean in his eyes to calm her down.

"Piko, are you SoundlessVoice09?"


Aito's POV~~~

Thirty minutes left? Okay, now I'm getting nervous…

Rubbing my hands together, I walk over to the small bonfire. Len drapes his coat over Rin's shoulders as they walk off, whispering to each other. Kaito and Luka are sitting by each other, pointing at the flames and laughing at Kaito's burned marshmallows.

"Here, let me show you how it's done."

Watching her graceful movements, she heats up a marshmallow and gently places it on top of a cracker. Placing chocolate on top and another cracker to sandwich them together, she slides them to Kaito.

"Cool!"

Maybe it's the flames dancing on her beautiful face, or her cheeks are pinker than usual…

"Open up wide," Luka playfully says and Kaito happily obliges. Like some kid, he happily bites down on the cracker. I should be the one in his place. Why does she look at him like that and not-

Stop it, Aito.

I take in a deep breath and walk over there but stop when I notice how close their faces are.

"Luka, I need to talk to you about something serious…"

"What is it?"

Luka adjusts her sitting position, now fully in his view.

"Um, so, I've been thinking about this for a while…"

I see her bite her lip, fighting back a small smile. We both know what's coming next.

Kaito sighs and smiles at her. "I know we haven't talked much and all, but I like you. Not like a friend, I mean, in case you're confused. Romantically, of course. I think you're amazing, funny, kind.."

"Beautiful, cute, and make my head spin like crazy…" I mouth.

"And I would love it if you became my girlfriend."

No…

Luka finally lets her smile spread. The smile meant for me.

"Will you?"

Just one word, and it's all over.

"Yes."

Someone, wake me up from this nightmare.

Seconds draw out to hours as he leans in. Her neck stretches out. Her arms around him. His breath against her upper lip. The gleams in their eyes. Their hearts beating in synch. Brushing, meeting, completing.

Please.

Get me out of here.

I can't breathe.

The world keeps spinning.

When did things get so blurry?

Why am I here?

Why him?

Why not me?

Vehemently, I let out a chocked cry and run out, forcing my concrete legs. I don't want to see her ever again. I never want to see them. All I want to do is be left alone.

I can feel each bump from the bricks as I slide down the wall. Each breath hurts twice as much as before, stinging me as I try to cry, try to throw away the pain. Crying doesn't help at all, just makes my face sticky. If I had known loving someone would hurt this much, I never would have reached out to her. I never would have helped her.

One word is all it takes to ruin lives, I guess.


Miki's POV~~~

"Yes, yes I am."

I've been freaking out about this question for ages and he states it as simply as that?

"W-what?" I stupidly stumble over my next words. "Then that means you- I did- you are-"

His face stays the same.

How come he isn't saying anything? That day we spent together, all those texts we've sent to one another, why is he blankly stares at me?

"Miki, can I ask a question?"

I nod, afraid to make myself any more of a fool.

"Why does it interest you if I am him or not?"

My cheeks change colors. Even bluntly asking a question like that…

"Well, Miki?"

My heart races as I think about what to say. Should I lie? No, why should I run away from the truth? I'm not like those girls who deny and deny until the romance is gone and regret is all I have.

"Because I love you."

His lips part open, but he gives no reply. It's time for me to ask the questions, I suppose.

"If you were him, why didn't you just tell me? Why did you have to keep it a secret?"

"I'm sorry, I was so careless then," Piko says and sighs. "But I can't be like that now."

"Now? Why haven't you been speaking to me as often?"

Geez, that came off as clingy…

"I'm sorry Miki, but I can't do this anymore," Piko says and scratches his cheek, trying to take off some icing. "There are more important problems than our relationship."

The bluntness makes me frown. "Just tell me the problem, I can-"

I eye the cut on his cheek and take a step closer, trapping his hand in mine. "What happened to your face?"

I loosen my grip and look down at his arm as his long-sleeved shirt slides down. Bruises?

"Piko?"

Piko roughly pulls his arm back and sets it down. "I'm sorry Miki, but you'll have to excuse me."

"Why do insist on making this hard?"

He continues walking off, leaving me standing alone. I raise my hand, trying to get his attention. He isn't the culprit in this…because Piko wouldn't do something like this without reason. Well, SoundlessVoice09 wouldn't.

I'll solve your riddle, Piko.


Rin's POV~~~

I let out a sigh as we walk out of the eyes of others and into the forest. His hand keeps bumping into mine…

I don't really mind, actually. It's kind of nice.

"Hey, remember when we had that search in the Halloween party?"

Is that it? You'll go off flirting with other girls but when we're alone you become like this?

"Yeah," I reply, pushing away the negativity. "It was pretty scary too."

"Yeah…"

You don't have to be a mind reader to know what's on our minds.

"You know, you can talk about it, Len."

"What?"

I look down at the ground and kick a rock out of our path. "I'm not that fragile…"

"I never said you were-"

"Then why do you tiptoe around me whenever we come up to subjects like that? Why do you get all awkward as if talking about it will break me? I may have broken down in front of you, but goddamnit, I'm not as vulnerable as you think I am!"

I stop yelling at the ground and look up at Len. The mood has changed quickly and his face isn't as calm as before.

"Well excuse me for being sensitive to your feelings!"

This sets me off even more. "I never asked you to!"

"I'm only trying to be nice!"

"Oh, like nice to those girls back there? That kind of nice? What are your motives, Len? Do you want to hurt me, make me fall for you, or am I some kind of toy?"

"Toy? Jesus, Rin, you're being fucking st-"

"Then why do you tease those girls in front of me? Why do kiss them and get intimate when you know I'm watching?"

Len mutters something under his breath and shakes his head. "This is fucking stupid."

"Of course it is! This whole relationship is!"

"Why do I have to explain myself to you? Why do you even get jealous!"

Len steps up, grabbing my arms and making my eyes meet his.

"What are your feelings for me, Rin?"


Gumi's POV~~~

Sonika grabs my shoulder as I turn to get more snacks from the kitchen.

"Hey, you like that Aito guy, right?"

When did she know of this?

I feel my cheeks get red as I look away. Thank gosh it's dark. "W-why do you ask?"

"I saw him ran to the back of our house a while ago," she says and lets go of my shoulder. "I think something's wrong."

I look over at the small bonfire and see Luka and Kaito cuddling together. Did Aito snap?

"Go ahead and talk to him. I'll get the rest of the things ready."

"But sis, there's a lot of-"

"Gumi, you have this one chance on your love life. I'm not going to let these chores get in the way of it," Sonika says and giggles, patting my side. "Go and get him."

Nodding, I give her the boxes in my hands. "Thank you, sis."

She nods and heads in, leaving the door slightly open for more trips. Right, I should get to Aito.

I run over to the side of the house and then the back, calling out his name. Could he be in a tree? Bushes? Is he meeting someone back here?

Then, I hear it. Someone sniffling and softly whimpering in the dark.

Aito has always kept his emotions under check, and doesn't show much, so for him to be crying out in the open…

"Aito?"

I walk over a bush and see a boy hugging his knees and repeating a name over and over again.

Luka…

"Aito?" I call again and he looks up. He doesn't even bother to explain or stop, he just sniffs and pats the ground next to him. Gingerly, I sit down beside him and awkwardly sit there as he tries to restrain some tears. What do people do in these kind of situations? Do I hug him?

"I- I was going to confess to her today," Aito explains, lifting his head from his knees. I keep quiet as he continues. "I thought it would be a perfect way to start the new year. A romantic way. But I kept ignoring the fact that she doesn't like me, she loves Kaito."

We're not that different…

Aito sniffs and rubs his runny nose. "I don't even know why she likes that idiot. Do you know what we've been through? All the years we've been friends?"

I shake my head and he continues his story.

"When I moved over here, everyone was boring. Luka grabbed my attention because she was trying so hard to keep her friends and stay in the in-crowd. Even when she was like that, I knew how she was really like. I pestered her over and over until she finally let me in. I taught her that staying true to yourself is more important than being fake just so others will like you. Thanks to me, she has all this confidence that she has now. I worked hard to be her friend and to see her everyday. I was a teenager in love, and I would do anything for Luka. I know her down to the core. I know her flaws, problems, strengths, talents, how she loves to eat tuna, how she cries easily in Korean dramas, how she nervously bites her pencil when taking a test, how she looks when crying, how she looks when she's having the best day of her life…"

He sniffs again. "And then Kaito just comes along and sweeps her off her feet. He doesn't need to do anything- she comes running to him."

He shakes his head again, laying his head down. "It's just not fair...it's not. I love her so much, why doesn't she love me?"

I take a look at broken boy in front of me. My gosh, he's shaking. He stiffens as I place my arms around him, but over time his shoulders fall down and he holds my hands, placing them right by his heart. Each shudder and small breath connects with my skin, making me shiver.

I break the silence. "I know how you feel."

"You try everything for that person to like you back. There's a point where all you think about is them. There's no one who can take your eyes off of them. And…you never want anyone to do that, no matter how ignorant that sounds…"

"You may be in pain, but when you see that person smile….You just… it's just… one of the best feelings in the world. Maybe they don't feel the same way about you, but your suffering isn't in vain. And it's not easy either, it's actually quite hard sometimes. Sometimes you feel like crying, like breaking into a million pieces, just wishing that they could see you the same way. But when you get over those selfish thoughts…."

"There are times when you begin questioning yourself about everything…"

Does he want to push me aside? Does he want to hold my hand? Just one step, that much closer and I can boldly grab his hand. But is that what he wants? All I want is for us to be closer, but I guess that's a bit greedy of me.

"They make you feel different."

He slowly wrapped his arms around me and closed in on me. My hands laced around his neck and I closed my eyes. For once, I felt warm… and secure.

"And all you want is to hear them say those three words to you."

His breath pulls to a still.

"But Aito, there's also a point where it's not about whether she'd love you back or not. By then, you have to ask yourself if they're worth your love."

I let go of his hands and sit in front of him, leaning in.

"She's not worth it, Aito."

"She's not?" Aito repeats, watching my every move like a child learning something new.

As an answer, I complete the distance and lock lips with him.


Rin's POV~~~

My feelings for Len?

Since the first day we spoke, I knew something would happen.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," I say with a smile and offers my hand to him.

"You're that girl who was stalking me," Len replies as he merely looks at my hand.

'Stalking?' His words hit me like a brick and I firmly set my arm back to my side. The corners of my mouth fall as I take n his appearance. 'So this is the famous player who's known to break hearts.'

Rude, idiotic, mean- those are the words I would use to describe Len.

"How is your partner Rin?" Luka asks. "I mean, you're paired with one of the hottest guys in this school- Kagamine-san! Are you two dating yet?"

"Not even," I say as I roll my eyes. "And I wouldn't use 'hot' to describe him. I'd use words like stupid, mean, ego-filled, rude, player- words of that sort."

"Whoa. What did he do to get on your bad side?" Aito asks and takes a bite of his sandwich.

"He insults my artwork, he uses girls for his own pleasures, and he treats me like I'm naïve and stupid!" I huff and fix my bow. "He's terrible."

That same idiot took my first kiss.

Len turns my face back to face him and I blink. What is he going to-

Before I can even tell what the heck is happening, Len's lips are on mine. My left arm thrashes around while he grips my right hand. His tongue is licking my bottom lip, requesting entrance to get the candy.

I can't let him enter my mouth! I mean- but- I- the candy!

Suddenly, I feel a hand slowly run up my back, making me gasp as I shiver again. And with that gasp, Len enters and starts violating my mouth. I can feel his tongue inside and my eyes are wide open, but his are closed for some reason. Finally, he lets go from the kiss and leans down on the other bucket, spitting out the small candy.

I place my hand on my lips. Len Kagamine was just inside my mouth. His tongue was all over me.

"Looks like we have our winners!"

Len Kagamine. The guy I met a week ago. Was in my mouth.

"And here's your prize," the girl says, handing Len the envelope.

Len. Freaking. Kagamine.

Even though he is a jerk at times, he genuinely cares about me.

"What are you doing here Len?" I ask, tilting my head to the left.

"I just wanted to…" He starts off and stops. "Just wanted to see how you were."

"Aww, that's so sweet," I say.

We even went on a date, which I may admit that I kinda liked…

I sing an insult and stick my tongue out at Len. Heh, this is too fun.

"Those two are cute," Kaito says to Luka and she nods in agreement.

"CUTE? WITH HIM/HER? PSH, NEVER!" we both yell at the same time.

"STOP COPYING ME!"

"NO! YOU STOP!"

"GAH! YOU ANNOY ME!"

We both stop yelling and glare at each other. I turn away first.

"It's been a nice evening with you all," I say.

"I've had a nice evening, but this wasn't it," Len says.

Gah, I just want to rip this guy's hair out! He's so annoying! And of course, right after that, he gives me one of his stupid smirks.

"Well, bye," Luka says and smiles at Kaito one last time before we start walking off.

As we turn away, I can't help but feel my face heat up. But why? It's autumn and there's a cold breeze out. I can still see Len's stupid smiling face in my mind. A small smile of my own comes up.

Being tricked into a love show with that moron was uncomfortable.

"How long do you think this relationship will last?" Aoki asks Len and he starts writing. "Rin, what do you say?"

"A couple more months?" I guess, shrugging.

"And your answer, Len?"

"Oh I have already decided the answer a long time ago," Len says with a cheeky grin as he crosses his arms. "We'll get married. That's right, the future is amazing!"

"Ma-ma-marriage?" I yell, my face turning red. "You're crazy!"

"Yeah, I want to live in a place with beautiful scenery," Len says and turns to me. "And at least three kids."

"Okay, you're absolutely insane!"

Even though he's embarrassed me, I can easily make a fool out of him.

"So, what was it you were saying about "having some fun"?" he asks, his breath running across my neck. I nod and smile up at him.

"Yeah!" I say and give him a cheeky grin. "Let's fight!"

"What did you think I meant, Len?" I ask and flick his forehead.

"I- you- but- you-"

"I'm even making you stutter? And look at your red cheeks~!" I laugh and poke them.

"Come on Len- let's get started as quickly as we can."

And then I began seeing all different kinds of sides of him.

"What are you doing this for?" I ask.

"What do you mean?" Len asks, looking back to the girls.

"You're not the type to cheer others up. And you haven't really talked to Luka or Gumi either," I say and look at him, "or do you have some other motive?"

"Why would you think that I had some bad motive?" Len asks, slightly frowning.

"I-I don't know! This just isn't like you," I say and sigh. I look back at Luka and Gumi and smile lightly. "I don't know. I guess I'm not used to a compassionate side of you. I'm so-"

"Please don't leave me alone," he breathes out quietly.

I shouldn't be feeling this way about him. My heart twists and turns, but just after that, it's okay. The feeling of his arms around me is, oddly...comforting.

"I won't leave you alone, understand?" I say as he tears himself away from me. He looks away, indecisive.

"I'm a monster, Rin," Len says quietly, looking at the ground. "After all I've done and how I am with girls, I bet I'll die alone. I'm always alone. After mom left, dad left me all alone. Sometimes I think I was happy that he died. What kind of a person wouldn't be sad that his dad died? Not one single tear. I'm a horrible monster. He was too, and I just learned from him. Looking at everyone who has someone makes me feel lonely. Everyone has someone to hold and someone who unconditionally loves them. It's painful t-to see everyone."

"Why are you saying all of this?" I ask, getting a little scared. "You weren't thinking like this before."

"I'm always this way," Len replies, placing his hands on his head. "It was all a brave front. I don't like getting pity, and I can't stand it when you try being so nice to me just so I won't break. I don't want to be burden on you."

After just months, our relationship has changed. All it did was confuse me.

"Mayu, you don't understand," I say, trying to reason with her. "Len is just a friend. A very close friend...he may have his bad sides, but the more I got to know him, things started to change. Even though he's not who my dream, I could feel something...

…Around him, I can be happy."

I continue. "He makes me feel like I'm not the only one handling all my problems."

Len is more than a friend...but how much more?

Even though I understand this, why don't I know who he is to me? Why does it pain me to see him with other girls? I want to be the one by his side.

Why?

I still can't even understand! But with him, everything seems to shine. It's alright if I don't have Aito by my side. Because, if someone can smile, then it's alright! As long as you have a spark inside yourself, all hope is not lost. That's what I told Len on Saturday.

Why do I feel like this with him? Why is he always in my thoughts?

I remember...

"Why are you crying?"

I wipe my red eyes as my lip trembles. "I-I don't- I don't even know. J-just-"

I explode into another fit of sobbing again, my chest heaving out hesitant breaths.

"Now, now...shh..."

"L-Len, it was so scary! I didn't know what t-to do! I-it-she-"

"I understand."

"But what if you hadn't come? What if I died?"

My words come in clumps, pouring out like vomit in a desperate speed. He just lets the words pass through, patting my back as I puke them out, crying and screaming all my problems. From small things like cheating on a test to talking about my unrequited love. At last, I pulls back, wiping my mouth. He lifts up my chin as I sniff and erases the remnants of my tears. I give him a small smile in return.

But none of this makes sense. I love Aito- that's why I cried so much for him. That's why it pained me to see him talk about Luka so lovingly and see his eyes light up just by looking at her.

But no, that dream is gone…

I look up at Len, who's gone silent.

No…to feel that way about Len…I…

"No, I can't tell you! It's not even worth it!" I yell, trying to rip my arms away. I need to run away, I've already made a fool of myself.

"Rin-"

"I feel so pathetic- I try to play the hero and solve everyone's problems, but I'm the one who needs help! I'm too emotional and I always have one problem after another and I cry myself to sleep over every little thing. There's no way I can tell you how I feel! N-no one can like someone like me!"

"That's a lie, Rin!"

"It's the truth! And don't you dare try to feed me lies just to make me happy! I know I'm ugly! I know I have no sex appeal! I know I'm awkward! I'm not as good- I'm never good enough! There's always going to be someone who's prettier, smarter, funnier, and who's the exact opposite of me!"

I bend down as I feel my stomach coming up. Oh no, not now. I force it back down as I let out a cry and let my shoulders slump.

"See?" I say, gesturing to myself. "I've already broken down in front of you yet again. I'm pathetic, I'm pathetic, I'm pathetic…"

"Rin, stop saying that! You are not what you say you are!"

"Shut up!"

"No!"

"I said shut up, idiot!" I yell, punching his stomach.

"No, you shut up!"

"Don't you tell me to shut up!"

"Then let me say my part!" Len yells. "Rin, you are pretty. Maybe you aren't a playboy model or anything, but those other girls- the ones you're jealous of, they just get fucked and then dumped! You're better than that! You deserve real love, not lust!"

"Stop lying to me," I sob, punching his chest with my weak hands.

"You're my kind of pretty, Rin!"

"How can you say that with a straight face?"

"Because it's true! You're beautiful to me! You're hilarious, you make me smile with your stupid and corny jokes. I'd stay up all night to speak to you, no matter how annoying you get. You're very strong- do you want to see the bruises you've given me in our wrestling matches? And dealing with all your friend's problems even when they hurt you or you have your own to deal with? Most people don't bother to do that because they're so selfish and only stuck in theirs! You're goddamn special, Rin! Not just to them, but to me too!"

"Your lies…"

I give in from uselessly punching him and sob into his chest, gripping his shirt.

"Guys, the countdown is starting!" Sonika yells and everyone gathers around the television screen, watching the numbers go down.

"Ten!"

"Rin, these aren't lies…"

"Nine!" Kaito yells, squeezing Luka's hand.

I look up at him and rub my eyes.

"Eight!"

"How do I know that?"

"Seven!"

Miki sneaks a peek at Piko, trying to read his expression.

"Because I love you," is his reply.

"Six!"

Silence engulfs us as I let go of his shirt.

"Five!"

Aito smiles at Gumi as she pulls away from the kiss.

"Len…" I begin, begging my voice not to crack.

"Four!"

"Yeah?"

"Three!"

Meiko looks up from her phone, smiling at the sweet message from her boyfriend.

I clear my throat and lean in.

"Two!"

Miku stares out of her bedroom window, wondering what everyone is doing.

"I…"

"One!"

"I love you."

"Happy New Years!" everyone yells and cheers as fireworks fly out to the sky, illuminating the city like a fairy tale.

As the old year fades away and the new one arrives, our lips connect.


Oo~ Who do you think "the dream" is from the title? Maybe it's not a person but a special wish?

Wow, a whole year has gone by (or is about to go by, depending on where you live), hasn't it? Rin and Len met a few days before October 30 and now at the same place where Rin broke down, they're confessing their love to each other. A lot of things have happened in the span of those months, and I've hope you've enjoyed the ride. I know I have ^^

I just want to take a little time to thank every one out there reading this. *pours out life story* I kid XD

Not only has this fanfiction given me an opportunity to grow as a writer, but I've also grown close to Vocaloid. Heck, when the Kagamine's birthday passed on the 27th I cried. As OwlsPanicAtTheCity said to me as we were PMing each other, "they're more than just computer programs". I hope their songs have touched you as well ^^

And seriously, I have no idea how many times I have said this, but without you all, whether you read and run, throw your emotions into a review, have been reading each chapter since the beginning or barely followed yesterday, I wouldn't have made it where I am today without you all. Cheesy, yes, but I mean each word.

So, my adorable puppy (who kept distracting me while I wrote this chapter) and I want to wish you a happy New Year! We hope you've had an amazing one, and if not, then there's always 2013 to look forward to! :D

And don't worry, things aren't going to get calm after this. Expect a whole lot of drama in the upcoming chapters!

As always, thank you for reading and you can review down there if you'd like. If you do review, tell me what's your favorite part in this fanfiction so far. The paint fight? The "Love Question" show? The double date? Or maybe one of the craziest lines in the fanfiction? I want to hear what made you smile or gasp, because I'm grateful if any of this struck at least one chord in your heart. Gah, I've made this author's note loooong. Bye bye~!