Written for Klaroline Valentine's Day Bingo 2020 kcvalentinesbingo

Prompt: Speed Dating

Author's note: This is the much-requested sequel to Chapter 100: Part 4 - Klaroline Valentine's Day Bingo (Prompt: I never loved a man), found in my Klaroline series, A Beautiful Symmetry. Happy reading!


Caroline once fell face-first into a vagina cake. And still that was less embarrassing than what was happening now. She probably should feel some sort of pity for her ex-boyfriend standing before her looking like last week's garbage, but her rage kept getting in the way. And as an added bonus, his evil bitch of a sister was getting a front-row seat to the confrontation that she'd successfully been avoiding for weeks.

Crossing her arms protectively in front of her chest, Caroline coldly asked, "What do you want?"

"To talk," Klaus replied hoarsely, running his fingers through his disheveled curls. "I've been wanting to talk to you but you've shut me out."

"I blocked your number. I threw your stuff out my window — drawer included! What else do I have to do to show you that I'm done with you and your family's bullshit," she screeched indignantly.

Awkwardly clearing her throat, Rebekah cut in, reminding them both that they had an audience. "Well, on that optimistic note, I'll take my leave." As she passed by her brother, she hissed, "Stop being a wanker and fix this."

He stepped toward Caroline, hands outstretched, and she immediately moved away, but not before she registered his crestfallen expression. "Caroline, love," he pleaded, "I can't begin to apologize for all the ways I wronged you. I treated you terribly when we were together."

He looked expectantly at her, as though that bullshit admission would somehow magically absolve him of everything he did. But she would not break. Not this time. She leveled him with an unimpressed glare, but didn't speak. It wasn't her responsibility to make him feel better about being a dick.

"It's just that my family has never known someone in the sex industry and they didn't react well..." Klaus trailed off, gray eyes widening in alarm as he realized belatedly what he'd said. "Not that you're actually in the sex industry..."

"Seriously?! There's nothing wrong with sex workers —" she abruptly stopped, realizing that going on one of her usual rants about inequality and senseless social hang-ups wasn't going to solve anything here. "You know, just because Lord Furry Bottom III boinked Duchess Uptight Snatch to start your precious bloodline doesn't mean your family is better than the rest of us. And trying to justify your actions by hiding behind your family's elitist bullshit is seriously fucked up."

Despite his anguish, Klaus gave her a small smile. "Actually, it was Ansel Wolfington, the Earl of Mysticshire and the Marquess of Grimoire." At her snort of disgust, he hurriedly said, "But discussing the Mikaelsons' peerage isn't important right now. I know I hurt you when I didn't support your work. Instead I stayed wrapped up in my own career, foolishly listening to my family's poisonous whispers about what was right and proper."

"When you brought me to your firm's holiday party, you asked me to lie and say that I was in grad school. You were embarrassed by me and didn't want anyone to know about the bakery," Caroline retorted, not bothering to keep her voice down as she shouted, "I built my erotic bakery by myself and I'm proud of it! It was a huge deal for me to start my own business and just because it's an erotic bakery doesn't mean it's not a respectable business!"

He sighed, his voice a harsh whisper as he agreed, "What you did was amazing, sweetheart. I was just too stupid and selfish to realize it."

"When we went on that awful vacation with your family, you didn't defend me when they were so awful to me; instead, you placated them and said that it was a 'temporary flight of fancy' and that I'd 'soon get bored and flit off to the next obsession.'" She didn't care that his gaze was filled with regret as she reminded him of what he'd done. She couldn't care. "And if you loved me, you would've understood why my bakery was important and supported whatever business I created. But you cared more about what other people thought than my feelings."

Caroline could feel the fight leave her the longer she stood there. The only reason Klaus was apologizing was because he'd lost his favorite toy. He liked her in the abstract as a pretty blonde showpiece to take to parties. The moment she'd developed her own interests and started a business that conflicted with what he deemed as 'appropriate' is when he decided she wasn't good enough. "You don't know me and you certainly don't love me. I doubt you even love yourself," she told him quietly, slipping out of the room even as he kept begging her to stay.


Georgia O'Keeffe really knew vaginas. Caroline squinted at the reprint of The Blue Flower, pleased to see that the beautiful curves were translating nicely onto her cake. She carefully layered the flesh-toned fondant tipped in delicate pinks, rolling and twisting between her fingers to form the telltale folds. "Again with the vagina flowers," Kat told her with an exaggerated sigh.

"O'Keeffe's work is my go-to for vagina cakes," Caroline told her, not bothering to look up from sculpting the clitoris. "And I know why you're here and the answer is no," she warned, a bit of heat creeping into her voice.

Of course, Kat was never one to back down from a threat, and she threw Caroline an unimpressed look as she flounced down on a padded chair across from her. "You have to deliver the cake tonight anyway; you might as well stay for the event. It's not like you're doing anything else but despair and merlot."

Caroline rolled her eyes, carefully tucking several loose flaps of fondant underneath the bottom cake layer. The 'event' Kat was talking about was the Sweet Cheeks monthly amateur male stripper contest she held at her club. Since she catered every event, Caroline usually stayed for a drink or two with her friend. It always was nice to window shop — even when she had no interest in buying.

The breakup was too soon and Klaus was still...Klaus. He'd etched himself into her soul and it would be a long time before she could entertain the idea of anyone else. However, Caroline wanted to stay far away from this month's event because Kat had introduced a speed dating component into her contest, and Caroline knew it was because of her. Her friend was blunt, sarcastic and coldly pragmatic most of the time, but she'd been concerned about Caroline ever since the breakup and had exhibited an overbearing, nurturing instinct that was completely unexpected. "I'm not ready to date," she stubbornly told her, doing her best to keep her voice from shaking.

"It's speed dating, not a lifetime commitment," Kat replied. "Hell, it's not even a full night's commitment unless you want it to be," she added with a coy little smile.

Caroline closed her eyes, recalling the beautiful charcoal drawing that had been left inside her bakery's mailbox that morning. Just like every morning this week. With trembling fingers she'd untied the ribbon in her favorite shade of pink, unrolling the parchment to find her face expertly rendered once more. This time, it had been a picture of when they'd attended a violin concerto in Moonstone Park.

It had been a beautiful spring day filled with champagne and instrumental music and Klaus looking devastatingly handsome in a suit — it was a scene meant for romance — and yet, his drawing had captured her wistful expression and the uncertainty in her eyes while he appeared distracted and bored. And just like with all of his other drawings, he'd written down what he'd wished he'd done differently in that moment:

"You were a vision that day, but I was distracted by the firm's nonsense and couldn't be bothered to tell you that I could feel you slipping away. And that terrified me. You'd tried in vain to start conversations. First, you commented on the music and said you'd never attended an orchestra concert and suggested we go to one. When I mumbled something noncommittal, you tried telling me about your day and how excited you'd been to book another important client. I'd give anything to have set aside my resentment and spoke to you properly that day. I was a fortunate man to have had you in my life and you deserved better. You deserve to be with someone who listens to everything you say and tells you how special you are. I know I don't deserve it, but I wish you've give me the chance to prove I can be that man. Someone you deserve.

"Well,shitballs, that dimpled fucker really did a number on you," Kat bluntly said, pulling her from her thoughts.

"No, he didn't," Caroline shrilly insisted, stuffing down all of those teary emotional bullshit FEELINGS that Klaus' drawings kept causing. How dare he make her feel things!

There was that coy smile again. Kat challenged, "So, then I'll see you tonight?"

"Fine. Yes."


Sweet Cheeks had put their little town on the map, and Kat attracted the hottest talent in the region to dance at her club. Caroline's reputation as the sexy cake lady preceded her, and she happily waved to multiple groups as she walked in, the promises of free drinks ringing in her ears as she guided the ostentatious vagina cake into the main room. The monthly amateur stripper contest always drew a lively crowd, and tonight the place was packed with even more people than usual who wanted to try out speed dating with the strippers. At least Kat had been satisfied with her mere presence rather than insisting Caroline sign up. Deep down, she understood that Caroline wasn't ready. Would she ever be?

She grabbed a fizzy pink and purple cocktail from the beautiful bartender wearing glitter, eyeliner, and little else. Toying with the playful penis straw perched jauntily in her drink, she decided to embrace the spirit of the event and set aside her troubles for one night. She moved down to the infamous 'pervert row' that put her inches away from the stage, thinking a bit of harmless eye-flirting with the strippers would take her mind off of Klaus.

The blinding lights swirled across the stage, and when the shiny black satin curtains rose, she let out an excited whoop with the rest of the onlookers at the first contestant. Her first thought was that she wondered if the face would match that incredible body; her blue eyes sweeping appreciatively over the well-toned back and ass. The tiny little blue G-string was snugly tucked between his cheeks, and as they flexed, she felt a thrill of anticipation as she waited for the dancer to turn around.

Wait. She knew that cluster of freckles along the top of his right ass cheek. She'd traced them with her tongue countless times. Fuck. When Klaus finally turned around, his gray eyes blazed with something almost feral as he dropped to all fours, crawling across the stage toward her.

So much for her plans to not think about Klaus tonight.