"Does he do that all the time?" Bulkhead asked.

Starscream twitched and ignored him. He could still feel the earth vibrating underneath his pedes as Megatron approached. Megatron wasn't here, though—or at least, he shouldn't be. But it still felt like the Warlord was there. At any moment he'd come barreling through the trees, would wrap his talons around Starscream's arm, and wrench him away.

Starscream growled. He couldn't think about Megatron. He just had to push the warlord out of his processor for now—

"No, really, does he just go strolling through abandoned caves for fun?" Bulkhead shrugged as he ran up beside Starscream.

Bulkhead was not helping.

"No. He does not."

"But then why was he there?"

Starscream rolled his optics. "I don't know why my Master—I mean, why Megatron does what he does. The slagger just does whatever he wants."

Bulkhead's armor briefly froze up when he heard Starscream say the word Master. "So...what, you don't know if he likes to go walkin' around mines fun?"

"I don't care what foolishness he gets up to in his spare time as long as it doesn't concern me."

"Well, when does it not concern you, Screamer?" Bulkhead laughed. "He's kind of obsessed with you!"

"Obsessed with me," Starscream duly repeated.

Megatron's red optics had shone like two searchlights in the dark mine, almost as if he was watching, looking, waiting for someone—

Starscream flinched to snap himself out of the memory. Megatron had acted strangely. There was a strange twitch in his field, a subtle offness in the way his massive pedes struck the ground that made Starscream uncomfortable. He always got uncomfortable around Megatron, but this was different.

The last time he felt that strange twitch in Megatron's field was when Orion betrayed him. And now Starscream had just betrayed him.

"Slag, you're right, Screamer!"

Starscream froze. Apparently, he had said all of that allowed. It was getting harder and harder to tell his memories and the waking world apart.

"Did you see the way he just walked right by us? He seemed… distracted," Bumblebee beeped.

"He's so obsessed with you, although I don't know why. That bot can sure hold a grudge. We'll stop him, though!" Bulkhead declared.

" I'll stop him," a voice in Starscream's helm said. It was his own. He couldn't remember which specific memory it came from. He'd vowed to destroy Megatron thousands of times… but how many times did he actually fulfill that promise?

Starscream stopped and frowned.

"Well, I'm not obsessed with him, that's for sure. He does not matter to me anymore." He knew that Megatron really did matter, but he couldn't focus on that. For just a short while he wanted to be free from the shadow of Megatron.

The ground shook as Megatron drew closer and closer—

Starscream twitched as another memory of the event poured into his processor. "I'm going to take to the air." He needed to get away from here, away from the conversation and the memories and everything.

"But Optimus said we should keep an optic on you!" Bumblebee beeped in alarm.

"And you will. You'll just keep an optic on me from down here." He ran into the air and transformed.

For a split moment he just hovered there in the air. He saw Bulkhead and Bumblebee just staring at him, their field wrenching around them in confusion and indecision—

—And then he took off into the sky. He heard no protests over his comms. That was to be expected.

Megatron's approaching field had sizzled and crackled in the air like an angry storm. He had come so close to Starscream their fields had practically touched —

Starscream grumbled and flew higher. He could fly farther away from the ground, but he couldn't fly farther away from his memories.

Somewhere up in the sky with him was the Nemesis. At any moment he expected to see its vast sharp hull breach the clouds, its violet lights shining bright in the black night. He suddenly felt very uncomfortable up there in the wide open sky.

A distant energon source pinged on his scanners, just a tiny little deposit. It would take a while to get there. Nobody was expecting him back at base so soon. Primus, nobody wanted him back at base so soon except for Prime.

He couldn't possibly keep flying and scouting for energon while up high and visible to the Nemesis if it were there. Starscream sighed and transformed, falling back to the ground as he began walking to the energon, relief pouring through his frame to be out of the sky and away from prying optics.

"I was just too distracted to fly right. That's all," Starscream mumbled as he trudged through the forest. That was the only reason, he told himself. He wasn't trying to hide or anything like that.

Thump. Thump.

There were pedesteps behind him. Starscream twisted around, his red optics scanning the dark waving trees.

There was nobody there.

"I'm just seeing things again," he breathed out. That just had to be it. It was the only explanation he could possibly handle. "I'm just seeing things."

Starscream kept on walking when suddenly he heard it. A low and monotonous buzzing was humming through the air around him. He didn't know earth flora and fauna pretty well, but he was pretty sure that earth creatures didn't produce buzzing static noises. He just hoped there wasn't a Cybertronian creature behind him.

He heard the pedesteps again. Had his audials not been so sensitive he would've completely lost the noise amongst the sound of the moaning wind.

"Bulkhead, are you trying to sneak up on me again? You're not nearly as subtle as you think you are!" he shouted into the darkness. No response. It could've just been the Autobots. The Wrecker enjoyed messing with him, it had to be just him… and yet—

He heard the buzzing sound again, but this time it was coming from behind him.

Starscream very slowly and very carefully turned around. He turned, ready to complain to Bulkhead about his complete lack of subtlety—

The buzzing noise grew louder and louder until all Starcream could hear was harsh static. A bright violet visor suddenly lit, flooding the forest with a sharp purple light.

Soundwave stood behind him. Starscream froze.

He just stood there, perfectly still, perfectly silent. Starscream stared into his own panicked reflection in Soundwave's visor, his wings and frame covered in dirt and leaves. He'd heard Soundwave coming. Nobody ever heard Soundwave coming, not unless he wanted to be heard.

"STARSCREAM," Soundwave said using a recording of Breakdown's voice.

"What do you want? Do you want me to come back to the Nemesis and throw myself before Megatron, is that what you want, Soundwave? Is that what your beloved leader has requested of you?" he laughed out. He'd nearly failed the mission and incurred the Autobot's wrath and now Soundwave was here and Primus, Starscream was tired. Tired all the way down to his struts and down even into his spark.

"PRECISELY," Knock Out's voice said.

"Well, I am not coming back! Tell your Lord to find another Seeker to slap around!" Starscream growled in indignant anger. It'd be so easy to just activate his comms and let every single word of their conversation be heard by the Autobots. So easy. Apparently, Soundwave thought the same.

Soundwave tilted his helm as if considering him. "COMMS," he said.

Starscream scowled. "I'm going to call the Bots, you know. And Optimus will be here, and next time you won't be able to catch his sword before it strikes."

Soundwave said nothing. Suddenly his visor lit up. " You are never alone. Never. Soundwave is always near, and he is my audials and my optics. I know of your plans!" Megatron's voice said.

Starscream frowned and grit his dentae. "How… how much have you seen?"

"ENOUGH."

All he had to do was activate his comms and summon the Autobots. They would come. Right?

Soundwave just watched him from the other side of the clearing. He was observing the frequencies. He'd be able to detect the signal as it leaped out from Starscream, he'd be able to feel it and even intercept it—

Starscream just laughed. It was not a happy noise. "You—you're just goading me into activating my comms so you can shut them down, is that it? You want to see my cry for help so you can then snuff it out!"

Soundwave said nothing. He merely stepped closer.

Starscream stepped back. "You could've shut my comms off back in the woods earlier. But you didn't. You let me get help from the Autobots… why? "

He just stood there. "LET THEM COME. LET THEM COME," a recording said. It was an old recording, was old, so old that it dated back to the days when Megatron was still Megatronus and he was still a gladiator. He remembered the way Megatronus had stood up tall and goaded on more challengers, letting them come to him. Soundwave had been one of those challengers.

"LET THEM COME."

"I—"

"ACTIVATE. COMMS."

There was something off about Soundwave. There was a tightness in his shoulders and a hard glint in his blank visor that frightened him. For a split moment Soundwave's field flared out. Starscream recoiled in shock. Sounndwave almost never let other mech's feel his field, yet there it was, frothing around him. His field hung sharply around him, pulsing out cold and clear waves and a hidden miasma of emotions. Soundwave never let anybody feel the cold static of his field, not unless he was going to fight somebody.

Starscream's spark sank in his chamber.

Soundwave was challenging him.

"Starscream," Megatron's voice recording said. There was something different about this recording. "You have always fascinated me and amused me. Your treachery, your ambitious attempts to cling onto power, your weaknesses... You fascinate me the same way watching a dying mech is fascinating. You know you should not look. But you look anyway."

This voice recording was different. This wasn't a random series of voice clips stitched together to form a message—this was a speech composed entirely for Starcream alone.

"You stopped being amusing a long time ago. You and I both know this won't last," Megatron continued. His voice may have been just a recording, but Starscream still felt Megatron's presence there beside him, watching him, observing him. Waiting for him. "You are a vulnerability to your team. I will not stop hunting you, I will not stop sending my finest after you until you see reason. Soon the Autobots will see that you are only good at lying and they will drop you from their team once you realize what a magnet of danger you are. When you fall, there will be no one left to catch you, no one at all."

Soundwave approached him suddenly, his frame snapping into motion and moving until he was right in front of Starscream. Starscream's spark leaped into his throat and he slammed back into the trunk of a tree as Soundwave's servos lashed out and grabbed tightly ahold of the curves of his armor. Soundwave leaned in, his field sharp and freezing cold. He grabbed ahold of his wing with one servo and placed another servo right over his sparkchamber. His thin and spindly servo rested right atop his pulsing spark.

"Do you feel your spark pulsing in your chest? Do you feel how it gives you life? Only I truly understand your spark. Only I can help your spark keep pulsing. Only I can help give you a better life. The Autobots would sooner snuff your spark than accept it. Return to me." Megatron's recording continued to speak at a deafening volume, his voice booming out into the air and vibrating Starscream's armor.

"It does not have to be like this. It hurts, doesn't it? The paranoia... the anxiety... you just don't know when the Autobots will finally grow tired of you and beat you the way you deserve. You will be beaten... unless you turn yourself into me. Then you will be beaten less. Fall back to me, Starscream. Fall back. Prime may accept you, but we both know the other Autobots won't. And even if they do welcome you into their fold, it is only a matter of time before you return to me. It is the way of things. You have three days, Starscream. If you return before sunset by then, then I will be merciful to you. Choose. Choose now."

It ended. Soundwave silently stared at him. His long digits twitched as he just stared at him.

Soundwave never twitched. He wanted to grab ahold of the rogue Seeker and just haul him back to the Nemesis, just grab the wretch and throw him onto the bridge so that his Lord can be normal again. But Megatron had requested something of Soundwave, and Soundwave had to fulfill his request. He was no longer meant to capture the Seeker. His job was to convince the Seeker into getting himself captured. It would've been so easy to no longer hold back and just grab ahold of his wings and send him falling through a bridge back to his rightful place beside Megatron. Soundwave wanted to capture Starscream. But he wanted to please Megaton and fulfill his Lord's wishes even more.

Starscream knew this. The only thing that stopped the communications officer from lunging at him and hurting him was Megatron's word alone.

Merciful. The hopeful word rang through Starscream's helm.

Soundwave silently stared at him. He reached a single servo out to him.

Starscream looked at his outstretched servo—

he had grabbed ahold of Megatron's talon and shook it—

"We will bring justice, Starscream. Justice!"

—and Starscream twisted away from him and ran. He transformed and flew away high into the sky, farther and farther and farther into the night until Soundwave was just a black shape in the woods down below.

He kept on flying, the sight of Soundwave's reaching servo burnt into his optics. He flew in wide circles through the cold sky until the air stopped buzzing and his spark stopped racing in his chestplates.

Starscream grunted as he transformed and stumbled down into the woods besides Bumblebee and Bulkhead, his optics wide and his frame shaking.

"Are you okay?" Bumblebee beeped.

Starscream opened his intake to tell him everything. To tell him about the blank look in Soundwave's visor. To tell him about the anger he held tightly within his frame and his outstretched servo and Megatron's cold and stern voice, loaded with promises of mercy and with promises of so much unspoken pain

He opened his intake and booted up his vocalizer. But he couldn't speak. He just couldn't. The words were frozen in his intake.

Choose. Choose. The words echoed through his helm.

I could tell them everything, I could. He could tell them of the threat, of the ultimatum, he could tell them about how not even Megatron thought the Autobots would accept him, about how he was a magnet and that Soundwave would just continue to hunt him and pursue him and never ever stop—

A cold feel rushed through Starscream's struts. Primus, Megatron was right. He was a beacon for danger. Wherever he went, wherever he ran, wherever he hid, Soundwave would follow him, find him, and strike out at whoever sheltered him. If the Autobots learned of how much his presence attracted Soundwave, if they learned of how much Starscream's presence endangered their team—

"You are a vulnerability," Megatron's voice whispered.

This was too much. He needed time to think. So he did what he did best: he lied.

Starscream took a deep breath and shook his helm. "I didn't really find anything. I'm just... tired of all of this organic slag getting in my joints."

Bumblebee nodded slowly. "Then let's go back to base."

Starscream just nodded. He knew Soundwave was still there. He was always there. Always waiting, always watching. The only thing he could do was choose to ignore him.

Choose. Choose. The words echoed in his helm.

"You okay, Screamer?" Bulkhead asked.

Starscream just nodded automatically. "I'm fine."

The groundbridge opened up and he walked up to it. Right before he returned passed through the glow of the bridge he cast one last glance out into the woods. There was something there in the trees, pulsing out cold and clear waves and a hidden miasma of emotions.

Starscream took a shuddering vent and ran through the bridge, his spark pulsing hard in his chest.

Soundwave recorded everything.


The globe of the earth spun before him. The location of all the mines glowed bright red on his HUD, stinging his optics and making him wince. But he had to see them. There had been only so many mines the Decepticons harvested from and he had already given so many of them to the Autobots. There were a handful there that he hadn't given to them, though. Not yet at least. Massive mines in deserts and arctic tundras and deep forests floated before him. Every time he saw one floating before him on the map, his spark leaped in its chestplates.

This shouldn't be so difficult. The Decepticons had treated him so terribly, so it shouldn't be hard at all to hand the mines all over to the bots who really deserved them. And yet—

Megatron's promise floated in his helm, the voice message playing over and over in his helm. He'd taken a picture of Soundwave standing before him in the forest. He wasn't sure why he did, but he had, and there it was, a picture of Soundwave just standing there in the dark night hovering on his HUD. He had been twitching.

Soundwave never twitched. But Soundwave had never hunted him down and gave him an ultimatum, either.

"Scream? You there, Scream?" Bulkhead asked.

Starscream jolted and jumped back. Bulkhead and the rest of the Autobots were all just staring at him.

"What? Can't you find another bot to just stare at?" Starscream snapped.

"You completely tuned out!" Bumblebee blooped.

Bulkhead leaned down and looked him in the optic. "You're thinking about choosing to rat us out to the Cons, aren't you?"

Fear closed in around his spark chamber. Choose. Choose. Soundwave had reached out his servo to him, willing him to take it—

"No! No, I—"

"Ha! Just kidding, Screamer," Bulkhead laughed as he leaned away. "Just kidding," he repeated, a hard glint in his optics.

Starscream gulped. He knew he wasn't entirely kidding.

"That is enough. There will be no 'ratting out' here today," Optimus said as he stepped forward. There was something off about him today, something strange about his field and the way he approached him. "Starscream, we need to talk."

Starscream felt his spark chamber freeze in his chest plates. "Well, all right then."

"You seem… distracted."

"Pffft," Starscream scoffed. Nobody knew about his encounter with Soundwave. Nobody knew about the ultimatum. "I'm perfectly fine, Prime!"

"Are you sure? Do you think you are well enough to go on the next mission?"

"Of course I'm fine! When am I not fine?"

Optimus just frowned at him.

Starscream sighed. "Don't answer that question. I am all right, really, I am!" He couldn't let them see how scared he was. Couldn't let them know that he still felt Soundwave's presence watching him at all times.

"I worry that your encounter with Soundwave in the stream has traumatized you. I worry that it haunts you."

"Oh, Prime, you think he haunts me? You think that little spat in the stream was bad? I have faced much worse than that over the last thousand years."

Optimus frowned again and sighed. "That is not the first time he has gone after you?"

Starscream bit his lip. He thought of all the times he ran away from Megatron, vowing to never return, only for Soundwave to come back and force him to return. He thought of his visor, always blank, always watching.

"It's just the way of things, Prime."

"...I see.

"Optimus, we've got another Con invasion! They're going after another mine!" Arcee shouted from the main room.

Optimus shut his intake and let out a vent. "We will talk again later," he finished. A familiar emotion bloomed in his field, all hot and staticky. It took Starscream a moment to recognize the emotion the Prime was feeling, but when he finally recognized it he felt his spark drop in his chestplates.

Disappointment. Optimus was disappointed. He wasn't disappointed in him, no, he was merely disappointed to be interrupted by the Decepticons. Even though Starscream knew the disappointment wasn't directed at him he still couldn't help but feel a brief burst of fear.

When Starscream failed, Megatron would get disappointed in him. And whenever Megatron got disappointed in him...

bleeding on the ground, vents coming in harsh gasps, Megatron looming over him, raising his pede—

Starscream shook himself out of the memory. Whenever he disappointed Megatron, a price had to be paid. He knew Optimus wouldn't beat him. That wasn't his method of punishment, that was not his price.

Optimus walked away to the groundbridge, his massive frame lit up brightly by the bridge's light.

The problem was, Starscream had no clue what Optimus's method of punishment actually was.

Starscream moved off back into the darkness of the corridors, hoping he'd never have to find out what the Prime did to those who failed.


They were getting away.

The massive spaceship covered the entire sky as it slowly took off, its enormous engines burning brightly like suns in the night. The Autobot sigil on its side shone brightly and reflected the bright plumes of engine fire.

He had to shoot the ship down. He flew and weaved around blaster bolts fired from cannons, spinning round and flipping around through the air as he lunged for the engines. This was the last Autobot ship to leave for today and Primus, he could not afford to let it get away before it caused problems for the Decepticons out in the stars. His energon pumped hard in his systems and his wings and engine ached, but he had to keep flying, he just had to.

A single shot to the engine was all that it would take to bring the massive behemoth crashing down. Something purple and silver quickly flew by beneath him before vanishing, but Starscream couldn't focus on that. He activated his targeting system, locked onto the engines, prepared to launch his missile—

A plasma bolt grazed his wing and sent him into a spin-out, forcing him to transform back to root mode as he plummeted through the air.

"No—!"

Starscream fell and Cyberton whirled on all around him. The ship flew farther away, its massive engines blindingly bright, and he could not let it get away, couldn't fail again—

He fired his missile blindly.

Starscream slammed onto the ground with a clang and winced as he felt his armor split open. He scrambled up to his pedes, looked up to the ship—

And watched it fly away. His missile's smoketrail drifted in the wind. A dark scorch mark was seared onto the side of the hull. It completely missed the mark. He just laid there and watched the Autobot ship vanish amongst the stars through the whirling green light of a spacebridge. The only sounds he could hear were the sounds of distant bombs thudding and going off in the distance and the sound of his racing spark.

Which mission was this? He couldn't remember. He'd done so many by now that they all just blurred together. He could hardly remember life before the war. One day he was flying through the glistening spires of Vos, and the next day he was falling from them as they burned down. There was one thing about each mission he definitely remembered, though: his punishment for failing them.

Someone transformed and landed beside him. One of his trinemates, hopefully. He hadn't seen them in so long.

Suddenly he was being slammed down onto the ground. He gasped as he felt something break and tear within his armor and hot wet energon went spilling down from a crack in his back. The massive spaceship kept flying by, vanishing into the night sky until the lights of its engines were indistinguishable from the stars.

"You have failed me!"

"I tried my hardest, Master, I really did!" Starscream shouted as he tasted blood well up in his mouth. The ship was so far away now, so far away. He had to find some way to please Megatron. He had to.

The ship was only halfway through the groundbridge. Maybe, if he was fast, really fast, then he could catch up and still take out an engine—

Or he could burn up within the engines.

Megatron lifted him by his chestplates until they were faceplate to faceplate. "You promised me you'd help bring justice," he breathed, his breath thick with the smell of energon.

"I tried, I did! But that blasted ship is just too fast!"

"Failure is not an option. I told you to get that ship, and you failed. You chose the wrong option, Starscream."

Hot frustration blared up in his field. "I didn't choose to fail!"

"You did something wrong! Starscream, Starscream, why are we fighting this war? You must do whatever you can to accomplish your mission! No matter the consequences!"

Starscream spit out a globule of energon. "For justice," he shook out. The ship was almost entirely through the spacebridge now—

"And do you know what we must have in order to bring about justice?"

Starscream sighed, tired to his core. "Power."

"And how will we achieve it, Starscream?"

"By… by pain," Starscream mumbled out as his wings burned in agony.

"By making the Autobots feel pain, Starscream. I thought that you would make them feel the pain that the last Seekers did as they burned within Vos. Clearly, I was wrong. Oh, you promised you'd avenge them, Starscream. How could you fail?" he whispered, disappointment in his field.

The disappointment hit Starscream like a wave. He'd failed. He'd failed Vos. And now he'd have to pay for it. He looked up into the sky and saw the bright green spacebridge grow smaller and smaller until it was just a pinprick of light.

Megatron loomed over him, his field deep and heavy with disappointment.

"Just get it over with," Starscream sighed.

Megatron threw him across the ground. The beating began. Starscream's helm hit the ground and got cracked, his shins were snapped and his back was scarred, all within the span of a few frenzied, bloody minutes. He remembers the pain so clearly. He remembers how long he chased the Autobot ship for, just the desperation, the burn of his engines, and the pain that shot through his helm as Megatron clawed his back.

The energy from his desperate flight was escaping from his burning frame now, leaving behind nothing but a cold ache that seeped down into his sparkchamber. He didn't know how many more times he could push his engines like this. He was burning up from the inside.

Megatron reached a servo down and gently helped him to his pedes. "Do you understand why you failed?"

Starscream nodded. He looked out across the burning remains of Iacon and at the ruins of Vos in the far distance. The echo of a Vosian ship taking off drifted across the wind. For a single moment he was struck with a sudden and intense feeling of longing, a desire to just transform and fly away into the night.

Megatron just stared at him, his red optics burning brightly in the gloom, scorn and derision curling in his massive field. He couldn't leave Megatron behind, though. The price to pay for being treacherous was one Starscream could not afford. Starscream bit his lip and shakily stood to his pedes as he forced himself to look away from the far horizon and the promise of freedom. Flying off into the night wouldn't bring justice—only following his Lord could help bring justice. He felt the sheer disgust Megatron had for him burst out into his field and crackle against his armor. Megatron didn't even bother hiding it.

Starscream frowned. "I do understand," he said. He hadn't tried hard enough and so he had failed. He should've flown right into the ship's engines, should've put himself right into the line of fire—he would've gotten hurt so badly, so horribly hurt. But he still should've put himself into danger. He had to succeed and not fail the mission by doing whatever it took.

"Follow me, Starscream," Megatron said as he stalked off without sparing him a single glance.

Starscream glared at his retreating form as he just stood there. I don't want to follow him, Starscream thought suddenly. The traitorous thought had just leaped into his helm. He really didn't want to have to go following him, didn't want to burn up for him anymore.

"We must bring justice, Starscream. Justice!"

...But Megatron was right. He had to bring justice. And following Megatron was the only way to do it.

"Yes, milord," Starscream moaned as he ran to catch up with Megatron. The warlord ignored him and just stared off across the burning battlefield.

"Good. Now get back out there. I have another mission for you…"

He just sighed and listened to what his next assignment was. Starscream got up, transformed, and blazed off into the night, pushing his engines too far once more.


Starscream jolted as the memory ended. He just stared at the massive crashed ship ahead of him that was littered with deactivated frames.

It was just another old crashed warship, another chunk of a once proud Decepticon vessel that had been reduced to nothing but fragments. The frames of the mechs who died in the crash were scattered all across the impact site.

"Primus, how old is this crash site?" Bulkhead asked, his optics wide.

Optimus just stared at the ruins and his field pulled taut around him with emotion. Starscream didn't understand why. It was just a ruin full of old dead frames. Optimus's field flowed slowly around his massive frame, but there was something… off about it. For a brief second Starscream felt a burst of static leap out from the Prime's field and race across his wings.

"Old, Bulkhead. Very old. This wreck dates to the earliest years of the war."

And there it was—that hitch in his field, that buzz of static. Starscream knew grief when he felt it. He felt it buzzing and hissing in his own field often enough. Starscream looked closer at the wreck. Somehow, for some reason, Optimus grieved for the frames of the dead Decepticons. One of the frames looked familiar, so he squinted and looked closer—

There was a dying mech dragging himself across the battlefield, Autobots vengefully closing in—

He frowned. This wasn't that same mech he had tried to rescue. That mech had died long ago before his own optics. This was a different corpse. After a while they all looked the same.

Starscream didn't have time to think about it any harder.

"You ready to blast this fragger open?" Bulkhead gleefully laughed as he transformed his servo into a wrecking ball. Optimus gave a single stiff nod and they all stood back and watched as Bulkhead went to work. Starscream glanced at the frames again and felt a chill settle down into his core. One of the frames had a long slash through it. A jolt of recognition shot through him.

Bulkhead smashed his wrecking ball into the wall and it split apart with a rending screech.

Starscream could hear the sound of the dead and the dying screeching—

The wall fell to pieces and Optimus walked through, the faint lights casting his massive shadow onto Starscream.

Megatron's shadow fell over him and he'd looked down at him and said—

"Such a disappointment," Bulkhead sighed as he looked out over the meager supply of energon in front of them. Hardly any of it had survived the crash. This mission was a failure.

Megatron's breath had been thick with the smell of energon, and he looked at him and shouted "You have failed me!"—

Optimus turned his helm around and looked right at him.

Megatron's helm swiveled around and he looked at him, his red optics blazingly bright with rage as he stomped over to him and—

Starscream walked over to one of the dead frames. He knelt down and reached out a servo to brush away the dirt from the gash in its chest. He brushed it away and felt horror fill his field.

Only Megatron's sword left such sharp gashes.

"What's wrong?" Bumblebee beeped as he walked up beside him.

"He killed them," Starscream said softly. He was not the first soldier to be abused by Megatron and he wouldn't be the last. He wondered what mission these mechs failed in order to deserve death. Megatron had probably—no, he had absolutely already forgotten killing these bots.

"He what?" Bumblebee frowned.

The air buzzed.

Starscream turned around and the buzzing grew louder. "He's here," he whispered.

He felt them before he saw them. A waver in the air, the hiss of static in an approaching field, a shiver that ran down his spine.

He turned and saw two drones coming right at them from across the river. Optimus's battlemask snapped shut across his faceplate. He quickly glanced back at Starscream with a look that said stay here . He got up, and he moved.

Optimus ran across the river, his blade flashing and his optics blazing blue as he struck down the two drones.

It all happened so quickly he hardly saw it. One moment Prime was standing before him, the next he was a red and blue blur slicing through the spark chambers of the drones.

He just stood there in the waters as they rushed by, his frame silhouetted by the golden light of the setting sun around him.

Starscream blinked and for a moment red and blue was replaced with silver; he saw Megatron in the stream, the energon sluicing past his massive pedes after he killed those soldiers—

He flinched and shook himself. Optimus was not Megatron. But for just a split moment there—

"Primus, they just came out of nowhere!" Bulkhead shouted.

"Do you think the Decepticons know we're here?" Bumblebee beeped.

Starscream looked up into the sky. For half a second he thought he'd see the vast silhouette of the Nemesis hovering there and blocking out all the light. There were only clouds up there for now. For now.

Optimus looked at all of his team members. His optics lingered on Starscream and he frowned. "I think those were just two unlucky patrols. If there are two drones here, there are more elsewhere."

More elsewhere. But it didn't matter how many drones there were because Starscream knew that Optimus could easily defeat them. There was one bot he could not easily defeat, though, and that was the bot Starscream feared the most.

He blinked and for a split second he saw Megatron there.

To encounter Megatron that one time had been sheer chance, he thought. Horrible, terrible chance, but still just a coincidence. But to encounter Megatron twice would be no mistake at all.

Optimus knelt there, his blade covered in energon, not tired at all from the effort of killing the drone.

The word rang through Starscream's helm. Failure. Failure.

The drone's frames were greying out already. Starscream knew that if he failed, Optimus would not kill him or beat him. But he didn't know how the Prime would react when he would fail, what kind of punishment he'd devise for him. It was only a matter of time before Starscream failed a mission and he found out just what the price for failure was, though, and he didn't know when he'd fail and it was only a matter of time before he messed up, and time was escaping him and the sun was setting—

"Three days, Starscream. Three days," the memory of Megatron's voice hissed.

The first day was nearly over. Three days were now two. Two days to return to Megatron and the abuse he once knew, or stay at the base and face whatever punishment he would inevitably face for failing a mission, for ending Cliffjumper's life.

"Choose now or choose never."

He didn't want to choose. He just wanted to bring justice like he'd promised, but he didn't know how—

Choose.

Choose.

Optimus—or was it Megatron?lifted his helm to look at him and opened his intake to say something.

Choose. The voice boomed in Starscream's helm and briefly deafened him. He didn't know if it the voice was in the air or if it was all just in his helm, or if that was Optimus standing before him covered in spilt energon or Megatron or who those victims were and if he'd become one of them and—

And Starscream ran. He needed to be alone.

He could smell it in his vents. The stench of spilt energon, of burning oil and the hot smell of energon on Megatron's breath. Far off in the distance he heard the sound of Decepticons fighting Autobots, their hundreds of blaster bolts ringing in his helm. There were no Decepticons here, he logically knew that—there was just the Autobot scout, the Wrecker, the unknowable Prime, and himself, the awkward Autobot-yet-not-Autobot who was trying so hard to make it onto their team.

"Once a Decepticon, always a Decepticon," Megatron said, his voice rough and gravelly.

The rays of the setting sun shone through the trees and onto his armor. Bumblebee moved in front of him as he tried to run away, beeping and blooping as he grabbed ahold of Starscream's shaking shoulder. Starscream flinched away. A bomb went off in the distance.

Bumblebee's field was staticky with confusion as he grabbed ahold of Starscream's arm and tried to pull him close, his Autobot badge glinting in the light of the sun—

And suddenly Starscream could feel the earth shake as the massive Autobot breached the sky and flew into space, its badge glinting in the light of the sun as it escaped, the massive spaceship he had tried and failed to stop, he had failed—

"Starscream," Optimus said. "Are you alright? You have just been staring into space for the past few minutes."

Starscream blinked slowly. He could still hear the sound of blaster bolts firing off in the distance. He had somehow drifted away from the rest of the Autobots, leaving him with just him and Optimus. Bumblebee and Bulkhead stood a ways off in the trees, their optics watching the two of them.

"Soundwave! Megatron! They're here, Optimus. I can feel their presence," He shook out, his optics darting around as he scanned the shadows. He sent out scan after scan, pulse after pulse, and detected no spark signals except for the beat of his own frenzied spark and the calm spark of Optimus.

Prime just stared at him, his blue optics bright in the light—

The soldier was alone. He'd tried to save another fellow soldier, but he'd failed. The Autobots were closing in, their blue optics bright in the light of the battlefield—

Starscream flinched and jumped away. He just had to focus on the mission. He just had to ignore the stench of the spilt energon wafting through his vents, and although he knew it wasn't there, it wasn't real, he still could smell it nevertheless. Megatron was there.

"He's here," Starscream hissed. A strange clattering noise rang out into the woods. "Don't you hear him? He's coming!"

Optimus just stared at him and a strange emotion arose in his field. All of the Autobot's blue optics were staring at him, boring into him, and he had seen the way those Autobots approached that lone solider, he remembered what they did to him for failing to escape. Optimus's engine quietly rumbled. That strange emotion arose in his field again, deep and sad and sickeningly familiar.

He'd felt that emotion in other mech's fields so much recently, the stench of pity, and he didn't know how to feel about it. He wasn't something to be pitied. He was strong, he had to be, or else he'd fail—

Optimus suddenly grabbed ahold of his arm and pulled him off to the side. Starscream yelped and stumbled as he pulled him farther away from the Autobots and off behind the trees, away from the shadows and the distant sounds of the battlefield.

"Let me go —"

"— No."

"But Megatron—"

" — is not here," Optimus finished.

"You don't know that!"

"I do, Starscream. I do. I know that it feels real. I know he haunts you."

"He does not haunt me! He's no ghost, he's really here!" Starscream scoffed. A buzzing noise rang through the woods and the smell of spilt energon hung hot and thick in the air. Prime just looked at him with that patient and kind gaze. Didn't he understand the urgency? Didn't he smell the blood and hear the buzz and couldn't he hear the battle? "Don't you hear it, Prime? You have to, how could you not?"

Optimus grabbed ahold of his shoulder and held him steady. "Starscream... you can hear a battle?"

"Are you deaf, Prime? It's so loud!"

"There is no battle here."

"There's always a battle, everywhere I go! Can't you hear it?"

"There are only the sounds of the woods. Listen, Starscream, listen."

Starscream snarled and tried to break ahold of the Prime's grasp, but the scout was surprisingly strong. He leaned in until all Starscream could see was his bright blue optics and his red and blue armor.

"Listen," Optimus spoke quietly. "Just listen."

Starscream growled and stopped thrashing. If briefly indulging the Prime was what it took to convince him of Megatron's arrival, then he'd do what Optimus wanted. He rolled his optics and turned up the sensitivity on his audials. He heard the cries of the dying, the sound of a bomb thudding in the distance. He heard the sound of Bumblebee and Bulkhead mumbling to each other, the sound of the leaves blowing in the wind.

"Listen. What do you hear?"

"Oh, Starscream," Megatron said, his smooth voice echoing into the woods. "Oh, Starscream."

"I hear Megatron, can't you hear him too!?" Hot panic began to bubble up in his field. Megatron was coming and nobody wasn't concerned, nobody understood him.

"He is not here. Calm yourself, it is just us."

Starscream frantically looked around, his optics bright and wide as he scanned the woods for any sign of silver armor.

"He has to be here. He's always watching," Starscream choked out.

Optimus's field pulsed sadly and he gently placed his servo around the back of Starscream's helm. "He's there, Starscream. He's there in your helm."

He couldn't be wrong. He had been wrong about so many things in his life before, he couldn't be wrong about this. "No, he's here, he has to be!"

"No, he is not here. There is just me and your memories, Starscream. It is all just your memories."

"Then why does he always haunt me!?"

Optimus was silent for a few moments. "... So you have admitted it."

Starscream blinked. Optimus was just looking at him.

"What?" Starscream snapped out. Primus, he was confused. A battle was going on and then the Prime had suddenly pulled him aside, and now? Now Prime was just staring at him. His field warbled and pulsed around him.

"You finally admitted that he haunts you. It is alright to feel like he's still here. I have been waiting for you to finally admit that. You cannot just get over him that quickly. It's about time you admitted that you still feel like he's here. But Starscream, Megatron really is genuinely not here. Just an old ship and some energon is here, that is all. Starscream, are you… hallucinating?"

Starscream's wings flared. He tasted energon in his mouth.

"No, no, I am not hallucinating things! I know what I saw! I heard the battle going on and I saw Megatron, I saw the engines of the escaping ship and I saw the way they burned brightly over Cybertron—" He snapped his intake shut.

Optimus's engine just let out a quiet rumble and he sat Starscream down on a nearby fallen log.

"Over Cybertron," Starscream numbly repeated.

"We're not on Cybertron."

Starscream's intake dropped open. He had heard the blaster bolts of the Cybertronian troops so clearly, yet that was impossible. They had all died on Cybertron long ago.

"Even when I'm not on Cybertron... I still feel like we are there sometimes. I just... I don't get it."

He looked up and saw that the sky was orange. The sun was setting, which meant that today was over, which meant that he had two days to make his choice. Two days left to decide to stay with the Autobots, or to go back to Megatron.

Starscream already knew what he was going to choose. He understood the choice that he had to make. He understood that it wasn't going to be easy, though.

"The images aren't real, Starscream. The sights, the sounds—it is all over. It's not happening any more. It's not real. But I'm real," Optimus said softly. "Is this the first time you've hallucinated?"

"I do not hallucinate!" Starscream snapped.

Optimus just looked at him.

The sound of blaster bolts firing in the distance echoed off into the woods. He flinched. "Alright, so maybe I am… hearing and seeing some things. But it's fine! It's normal. I see things all the time."

Optimus's field hung heavily around him. "What do you see?"

The sound of another bomb went off in the distance. Starscream was intimately familiar with the the sound that particular kind of bomb made, the whistle it made as it flew through the air, the boom it made as it breached the atmosphere. He'd heard the sound of that kind of bomb as it had descended upon Vos and vaporized it. He heard it rumble, heard it whistle through the air—but it was a Cybertronian bomb, and Cybertron was light-years away.

Starscream buried his helm in his servos and growled. A part of him just wanted to take the Prime by his helm and scream out his anger at him, and another part of him just wanted to fly off into the night and never land. The trees moved behind him. Another bomb went off in the distance. Megatron stood behind him, looming over him.

Except Megatron wasn't there behind those trees, was he?

He never was.

"...You don't have to answer that question. I understand. I know what you're seeing right now."

Starscream's helm snapped up. "Do you really?"

"Sometimes after a long hard battle, I also feel like I am back on Cybertron. But I never hallucinate being on Cybertron. Starscream… is this the first time you have ever talked to someone about this?"

"...Maybe."

Optimus just sighed. "Why did you never choose to tell anybody about this?"

"I chose not to because… well... it would have made me seem weak. Very weak. And I could not afford to be weak, because those who are weak feel pain, and those who feel pain have no power. And those who have no power feel even more pain."

Optimus's optics widened. "Starscream, no. You are not weak for experiencing this. We have all gone through this to some degree. Is that the kind of environment Megatron has created for his soldiers upon the Nemesis? A place where mechs must hide their horrors for fear of ridicule?

"It is just the way of things."

Optimus shook his helm. "No, it is not."

"Well, that's... just how things are on the Nemesis," Starscream continued. None of this made sense. To bare your spark like that and speak of your fears to other Decepticons was a good way to get your helm bashed in by Megatron.

"That is not how things are amongst the Autobots. We will not see you as weak for talking about this. Ever."

"What, are you trying to console me, is that it?"

"I'm just trying to help you," Optimus said.

Starscream just stared at him. He heard the sound of another bomb going off in the distance… except the bomb wasn't really there, was it? It was just a noise, a noise from the past echoing into the present.

"...You... you don't think I'm weak for this? You're not disappointed?"

"Not at all, Starscream. Not at all. I am not disappointed in you, I am disappointed in Megatron for allowing such harmful and dangerous ideas to develop. I am disappointed in him, not you."

Starscream scoffed. He could still hear blasterfire off in the distance. "You know that if our situations were reversed, I wouldn't help you. I would've chosen to just leave you here to be haunted in the woods."

"I know. Megatron also chose to abandon his soldiers during their times of weakness. But I am better than you, and I am certainly better than him. I am presenting you with a second chance, another opportunity to not only better your morals, but to also better your mental health."

The smell of non-existent spilt energon hung hot and and thick in the air. Starscream felt like he understood, but at the same time this all made no sense to him. Had he been with Megatron when the hallucinations began Megatron would've just ignored him, would've just left him alone to be haunted by the past.

"Why do you keep choosing to help me? We could be harvesting energon right now, but instead you're using up all that time to try get me to stop hallucinating scrap."

"Because I choose to, Starscream. I chose to be here. I am here, and Megatron is not." Optimus lifted a servo out and placed it upon his shaking shoulder. "He is not here. And he never will be here in this place again."

Starscream let out a shaky nod. He wanted to just yell that he was fine and just go stalking off into the shadows, but then he glanced over and saw Optimus just staring at him, his field pulsing with pity. Starscream looked away.

The two of them just sat there in the woods. Starscream took a deep and heavy vent, closed his optics—heard the sound of non-existent blasterfire echoing in the distance—and opened his optics. The blasterfire faded away. The sound of the other two Autobots collecting their energon from the remains of the crashed ship softly echoed over to where the two of them sat.

"Do you want to talk about Megatron?" Optimus asked quietly.

He thought about it for a moment. "No," Starscream finally said. "I'm not ready. I don't think I ever really will be, to be honest."

"No, you cannot ever be fully prepared to really talk about such abuse. Nobody is ever truly ready for that conversation."

A thousand years of pain flickered in Starscream's field.

"But when you decide that you are ready enough to talk about it, I'm here."

Starscream just shook his helm. The smell of the spilt energon, the distant blasterfire, the sound of Megatron's stomping pedes—it was all gone now. The fear remained, though. The fear always remained.

"Why are you helping me?" Starscream softly repeated.

Starscream couldn't see Optimus's mouth past his battlemask, but he could tell that the Prime was smiling a sad smile. "Because I choose to."

"Choose now or choose never," the memory of Megatron's voice said. The sounds of the bombs and the blasterfire and the battle were all gone now. But Megatron's threat remained.

Starscream just looked away, his frame trembling slightly. They just sat there in the night.


He was going to be captured.

He could feel the Autobots approaching him from behind. The rev of their tires and engines echoed out into the night. The bright glare of their headlights cast the surface of the asteroid into sharp shadows.

Hot energon dribbled down from where his right wing once was. Megatron had ensured that it would bleed. Abandoned, alone, and utterly surrounded by enemies. He couldn't even remember the name of this wretched backwater world—it didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was the he had failed his mission, that he had disappointed Megatron, and that the Autobots were now coming.

"Slag it!" Starscream swore as he ran. His back burned with pain from where his wing had been torn away. Flying was impossible. His frantic run just made more energon burst free from his energon lines and just made his already exhausted frame ache even more.

They were coming. He had heard the screech of their tires so many times before, but had never paid the Autobot's any mind. He was faster than them, he had thought they could never catch up to him.

The sound of an engine booming burst into the night as they drove faster and faster.

"They can't catch me" Starscream breathed, his vision hot and staticky as denial bloomed in his field. He had thought they would never be able to catch him, ever ever ever—and yet there they were, racing after him. They would claim him. Megatron had seen to that. His only remaining wing ached with pain and shook as more energon sluiced out of the puncture wounds all across its surface. Megatron had dug his claws in hard and deep, ripping away one wing, mangling the other, and thoroughly humiliating his second-in-command.

They were just around the corner now. The tires screeched louder and louder, piercing his helm and ringing in his processor. Starscream stopped and doubled over, his frame scratched and bloodied and his field wavering with fear.

The fear was always present. Fear of the council, fear of Megatron, and fear of the Autobots.

Terror coiled around his spark, blood gushed out of his back, and Starscream waited.

The sound of tires rolling up behind him rumbled into the air. The swift clanking noises of bots transforming rung out behind him and a massive EM field brushed against his, bursting with hot static and pure power.

Starscream spit out a globule of energon and rose shakily to his pedes. He wouldn't cower in front of his enemy—he cowered in front of Megatron enough as it already was.

Starscream stood, took a deep breath, and turned around to face his captor.

"Hello, Prime."

Optimus inclined his helm. Several Autobots stood behind them, their blue blasters all pointed at him and all shining blindingly bright.

"It's about time you caught up to me," Starscream huffed as he tried to ignore the fear rising in his spark.

Optimus said nothing and just scanned him, his optics taking in the sight of his battered and bruised frame. "You will be coming with us, Starscream."

He raised his servo and Starscream flinched. This was it, this was the moment the Prime would beat him.

The Prime's optics widened and he lowered his servo again. For whatever reason, the Prime was surprised by his flinch. Starscream knew an advantage when he saw one.

"They'll come for me," he said haughtily as he put his servos on his hips. Lies, all of it was lies. The commlink had gone cold long ago. "When Megatron arrives, you will have much bigger priorities."

"He left you behind, didn't he?" Optimus said.

Starscream thought his bold words and quips would've evoked some kind of reaction, some kind of feeling out of the Prime—but there was nothing. His field was as calm and smooth as ever.

"I chose to be here!" Starscream snarled.

Optimus just looked at him. "You chose to bleed out alone here?"

"No, well—"

He was losing control. His lifeblood was pouring out from him, he was surrounded by enemies, Megatron was far, far away, and Starscream felt rage and despair coil in his gut all at once. Optimus just stared at him, ever-calm and unflappable.

"Get it over with!" Starscream snapped.

Optimus blinked. "Get what over with?"

"This pathetic game of yours. You and I both know what must be done!" Starscream said as he leaped back and transformed his servos into blasters. "I'll try to fight you, I will... but you and I both know how this will end. Just get it over with."

Optimus looked confused and uncertain, but it was hard to tell from behind his battle mask. It was all just was all just an act, though—Prime was never uncertain of anything. He had seen the Prime slice decisively and quickly through the frames of his enemies as if they were nothing.

Prime said and did nothing. He just stood there and stared at him with his endlessly calm and patient optics. It drove Starscream mad. He was used to being able to read mechs, he was used to being able to take one glance at them and just know what they were thinking and going to do.

Optimus was unreadable. Starscream looked at his frame, really looked at the way he held himself and his field and his optics—Primus, those optics—

And he saw nothing.

Optimus's thoughts were a complete and utter mystery to him.

Fear closed in around his spark.

"Why are you waiting?" he snarled.

"I am waiting for you to explain what you think will happen to you. Starscream, what precisely do you mean when you say that I need to 'get it over with'?"

Starscream hissed at him. "Well, aren't you going to beat me?"

Optimus recoiled. "No, I would never beat a hurt mech, not unless they proved to be a threat."

"I'm tired of your games, Prime. Let's get this over with Prime. Just... just push me down and crush my spark. I'll fight you, and you'll fight me—"

"What?"

"—and you'll win and tear my back open even more. It's the way of things. Or maybe you won't tear my back open, I'm really not sure how you beat your soldiers... what are you going to do to me?" Starscream asked softly. He hated having to ask, hated it all so much, but he had to know just what his punishment would be.

It could've just been a trick of the light, but for a single moment Starscream thought he saw the Prime's optic's soften. "Starscream—"

Optimus's helm shot off to the side. A groundbridge opened up and a whole horde of vehicons came bursting through. Starscream saw an opportunity and took it. He leaped away from the Prime just as he turned back around. Optimus reached out his servo to grab Starscream

Starscream felt the brush of his digits across his armor—

And Starscream ran away from the Prime and deep into the firefight. He ran for the bridge, and he never looked back. He didn't know what the Prime was planning on doing to him. But he knew what Megatron planned on doing to him on the other side of the bridge.

"Starscream!" Megatron shouted at him as his bleeding frame collapsed back down onto the Nemesis.

"You have failed me, " Megatron snarled as he stomped over to him and grabbed ahold of his shoulder.

Energon ran down from where Megatron's claws punctured his shoulder. Yes, Starscream knew exactly what awaited him here.


He hated everything.

Starscream trudged through the forest and smashed through the trees with the Autobots by his side. Night was falling and he had to squint to see. Tall mountains and hills rose all around them with a single road looping across the narrow cliff sides and through the canyons. The bright lights of an energon mine were up ahead.

"Can we just get this over with?" Starscream grumbled.

"Can't recharge just yet, Screamer. We still got a ways to go!" Bulkhead said as he tromped beside him.

Starscream rolled his optics and sighed. Bumblebee and Optimus glanced at each other and back at Starscream.

"So..." Bumblebee began awkwardly as he ran up beside him. "You're fine?"

Starscream rolled his optics. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're not... seeing things again?"

"I see an annoying Autobot."

Bulkhead snorted. "He's fine, Bee."

Starscream froze. "There's something wrong here."

"Oh slag, he's seeing scrap again!" Bulkhead moaned.

Starscream groaned. "No, something's wrong with this mine for real!"

"How observant of you!"

Knock Out and Breakdown came strolling out of the mine with cubes of energon heaped up into their servos and a dozen drones at their backs.

"You!" Starscream snarled.

"Yes. Me!" Knock Out declared as the drones rushed around behind him and hurriedly loaded energon through a groundbridge.

"Long time no see, Screamer," Breakdown said as he sneered at Starscream and Bulkhead.

"Move away from the energon!" Bulkhead shouted.

"I don't think so. The big M wants it for himself. Are you sure you aren't lost, Screamer? You should be on the Nemesis! I knew you were treacherous, but I never thought you'd go for Prime! You went Autobot on us," Knock Out scoffed.

"I am an associate of the Autobots!" It didn't feel right to call himself an Autobot—he hadn't earned that privilege. Not yet. Optimus was looking at him.

"You're an Autobot now, whether you call yourself one or not," Breakdown growled. There was so much anger in his field it made Starscream flinch.

"This does not need to be violent. Hand over the energon," Optimus said, his battle mask retracting over his faceplate.

Knock Out ignored him. "I can't believe you went over to their side. Whatever happened to overthrowing Megatron, hmm?"

Starscream's servos clenched into fists by his side. "I still will do that! But with… backup."

Something violet shone from within the cave. Starscream felt his spark freeze in his chestplates. Soundwave stood there amongst the hustle and bustle of the vehicons loading the energon through the bridge. The bright light of the bridge cast his frame into sharp contrasts and made his shadow fall upon Starscream.

Starscream stepped backwards as horror filled his field. "Not again, not again! This has to end!"

Starscream fired a missile and watched it arc through the air. It flew right past Knock Out and Breakdown and right towards Soundwave. At the very last moment he gracefully moved to the side and let the missile streak past him and slam into the groundbridge, making it explode in a giant fireball.

Knock Out and Breakdown looked at each other.

"I think that's our cue to leave," Knock Out said. They both transformed and drove off into the night down the winding roads, their cabs glowing brightly with stolen energon.

Bumblebee lunged forward and prepared to transform.

"Bumblebee, hold on. Something is not right here, this could very well be a trap. They are headed into difficult to navigate terrain and they are not carrying enough energon to warrant risking ourselves for."

The Autobots kept on talking but all Starscream could hear was the sound of their tires screeching off into the night. The Autobots wanted energon from him. They expected Starscream to provide them with energy, and the energy was right there, racing away from them all. Starscream froze and watched Knock Out and Breakdown drive off until the only noises he could hear were the screech of their tires and the sound of his own energon pumping through his lines.

The Autobots were talking about… something. The world seemed to slow down and melt away until all Starscream could see was the bright red glow of Knock Out and Breakdown's tail lights as they raced away.

"It's just too dangerous to go after them," Arcee sighed as frustration blared in her field.

They were escaping. They were getting farther and farther away and he could not allow that, could not allow this chance to slip away.

"Starscream—" Optimus began as he looked over to him. He was saying something, but Starscream couldn't hear him past the frenzied sounds of the battle—the sounds of the Cybertronian battle were coming back now—and he couldn't hear him past the noise of Knock Out and Breakdown's tires. They drove farther and farther away and all Starscream could hear was the roar of his energon pumping harder in his frame—

"I'll get them," Starscream said.

Optimus opened his intake to respond—

Starscream ran up to him. "I will get them for you. This mission won't be a failure!"

"Starscream, what are you talking about?" Optimus said as his field cautiously waved around him.

Another blaster bolt from a drone slammed into the ground beside them, sending a cloud of dust everywhere and obscuring both of their frames. Starscream's optics glowed blood-red in the dark cloud as it drifted past.

"I'll catch them for you!"

"Starscream, no. "

"Is this a test, is that what this is? I'll pass it!"

He activated his jet engine. Optimus's optics widened.

"No—!"

Starscream ran forward and transformed as he leaped into the air. For a split moment he just hovered there in the air beside Optimus, the Prime's shocked faceplate reflected upon the glass of his cockpit.

The massive dust cloud Knock Out and Breakdown's tires created covered the entire sky as they slowly took off, their taillights burning brightly like suns in the night. The Decepticon sigil on their sides shone brightly and reflected the bright glow of the stolen energon. He had to shoot the grounders down. He flew and weaved around blaster bolts fired from the drones, spinning around and flipping past the bolts as he lunged at Knock Out and Breakdown. This was the last mission of the day and Primus, he could not afford to let it get away, or else he'd fail the mission and would have so many problems for him back at base. His energon pumped hard in his systems and his wings and engine ached, but he had to keep flying, he just had to.

A single shot to both of their tires was all that it would take to bring them crashing into each other. Something red and blue flashed off to the side of him before vanishing, but he couldn't focus on that. He activated his targeting system, locked onto the engines, prepared to launch his missile—

Starscream gunned his engines and flew at full speed, the wind rushing and roaring past his frame as the Decepticons got farther and farther away from them. His entire frame ached with exhaustion but he had to push himself. He was so slow, so much slower than he usually was, but he had to be fast enough to catch them. He had to. He didn't know the price for failure.

Starcream sent another burst of power to his engines with a booming burst of noise as he shot towards the two of them like a bullet—

A massive weight slammed into his side and he was thrown into the air.

Starscream forcibly transformed back into his root-mode and slammed into the forest floor. He lifted his helm up, his optics bright and wide as he saw Breakdown and Knock Out swerve away from them down the road. Starscream reached out his servo, activated his t-cog as he prepared to take-off again—

They drove around a corner and out of sight.

"Starscream!"

Starscream swivelled around and came faceplate to faceplate with Optimus. He was kneeling in the dirt beside him and his entire frame was dirtied and scratched.

How could he possibly be there? He'd left Optimus far behind in his dust when he'd taken off.

"How—?"

"You have failed me!" Megatron had shouted that night on the battlefield. And that one time on the Nemesis. And that one time in the cave. And so, so many times before. Another failure to add to the list. And Starscream had just failed Optimus, so now Optimus would be the one to yell "You have failed me!"

Starscream growled and shook his helm. He couldn't afford to fail his new team after he'd just gotten it—he didn't know what the consequences were or what the punishment would be.

"I'll get them, you'll see, Prime, I don't know why I crashed, but—" Starscream groaned as he sat up. Hot energy raced throughout his systems and his frame rattled as the sheer power from his explosive blast through the sky continued to inundate his systems. Static hissed in his audials and his vision pixellated, but none of that mattered, the pain did not matter—the Autobots had an opportuntiy to get ahead in the war, Optimus had an opportunity to get ahead, and he had to get it for them.

"Starscream, calm down!"

"Don't lie to me! I need to get them, we need this advantage!"

"You are burning up! You are in no condition to continue this mission."

"My condition doesn't matter!"

Starscream flipped into his alt-mode and sent more power to his engines. The sheer energy raced throughout his frame and made error messages ping all across his HUD, but that wasn't important. He flexed his ailerons and prepared to take off—

He felt himself being picked up and crushed against a massive metal chest.

"Optimus, what—? "

Optimus had picked him up tight in his arms and was shoving him up against his frame, his massive red arms enclosed around his wing.

"Let me go."

"Not until you agree not to hurt yourself."

Primus, why didn't the Prime just understand ? Starscream transformed back into his root-mode and tried to shove the massive arms around his midsection away. Optimus just held him even tighter.

He looked past Optimus's frame and down into the valley below. Knock Out laughed and Breakdown honked as a bright green groundbridge appeared on the road right before them. They slipped through the groundbridge, completely vanishing from his view.

Starscream just sat there, his frame having and his entire frame shaking with raw energy as his fans roared and desperately tried to cool off his burning frame. He stared off across the forest floor. Two sets of tire tracks stretched off and then vanished ahead of him.

"Slag!" he yelled out as he tried to wrench himself free from Optimus's arms. Optimus just held on tighter.

He had been so close, he practically felt the air vibrating with the energy from their exhaust—

And they had gotten away.

"Starscream…" Optimus began.

"It doesn't make any sense! I could've gotten them, but something hit me and sent me skidding over here to you!" Starscream breathed out as he struggled in Optimus's grasp. How did the Prime get there anyway? He had left Optimus behind in his wake far back in the woods, so how was he there with Starscream?

Suddenly, he remembered. He had seen a flash of bright red and blue armor as he had flown along.

"You… you drove after me! You slammed into me! You stopped me!"

"I had no choice, Starscream. You were endangering yourself. What you did was reckless and could have resulted in serious injury to your frame."

"I could've gotten them!" Starscream snapped.

Optimus shook his helm and placed one of his heavy servos on Starscream's shoulders to hold him down. "No. You could not have gotten them."

"I was flying fast enough!"

"Did you notice that you were flying towards a mountain?"

Starscream snapped his intake shut and peered past Optimus and into the trees. A large rock wall that sloped up into a mountain was right down the road. The groundbridge that Knock Out and Breakdown had driven into had appeared right before that rockwall.

"You would not have reached them in time. They would have driven through the groundbridge, the groundbridge would have disappeared, and you would have hit the mountain at full speed."

Starscream was silent. He moaned and held his helm in his servos. He could still feel the long weld mars stretching across the side of his helm, a long and upraised bump that scarred him. A constant reminder of his past failure.

He didn't know he long he just sat there, his frame shaking as it cooled down as he stared off into the empty night.

"Starscream?" Optimus said. Starscream could feel the Prime watching him.

Starscream just sat there in his grasp and breathed heavily. A deep sense of dread suddenly settled down within his internal tanks. Optimus's shadow fell over him, completely covering him.

He had failed, and oh Primus did he hate that word.

The dust cloud left behind by the Decepticon's tires was fading away. Starscream struggled and thrashed as his frame burned up on the inside, trying to escape Optimus's arm and the dread of his failure.

Starscream stopped struggling and just rested there, his frame shaking and his helm pressed between Optimus's windshields. The hot energy that had raced throughout his systems was all gone now, leaving behind nothing but a cold void in its wake.

They just sat there on the forest floor amongst the tire tracks and the spilt energon, Starscream's frame bleeding off energy and Optimus's arms restraining him.

"Are you calm now?"

"Why did you do that?" Starscream hissed. He had been so close, so close, just one more burst of energy away from victory, and then—

"You tried to hurt yourself. Starscream, the mission was over. It was lost. Yet you continued to try and pursue them, and I could not afford to let that happen. You are burning up."

Starscream froze.

"You are burning up." The last time he had heard those words was when he and Optimus were alone in the snow before the ambush, alone with only pain and memories of the past to keep them company.

"Why did you try to pursue them?" Optimus said. His voice was not angry at all. It almost sounded as if the Prime… pitied him.

Starscream tensed up. "Let me go."

"Not until I know that you will not attempt something dangerous again."

"The opportunity is gone, Prime, thanks to you! I could've gotten them, I could've stopped them, I could've—"

"—gotten hurt," Optimus finished.

Starscream fell silent.

"Starscream… you knew the mission was lost. You knew that going after them would endanger yourself. Yet you pursued them anyway."

Starscream scoffed. "Yes, that was the idea."

Optimus was silent for several moments. He continued to hold Starscream tight against his frame.

"Did you… want to get hurt?"

"Primus, no! Why would I want to get all dented up?"

"Then why—?"

"Because I had to!"

Optimus looked down at Starscream. The Seeker twisted and tried to get away but Optimus just held him tighter.

"Why do you think that?" the Prime said softly. His field began to ebb and flow around the both of them in a strange way Starscream hadn't felt before.

"Because that's how missions work," Starscream scoffed. "I hate risking myself like that, but I need to. It's just the way of things. You try your hardest to achieve your goal. No matter the consequences."

Megatron's old words echoed through his helm. "No matter the consequences." When Starscream shut his optics he could still see the skeletal remains of the burning buildings of Iacon far off on the horizon.

"Did Megatron tell you that?"

"Yes, of course!"

"...He told you to accomplish the mission no matter the consequences."

Starscream was about to scoff again and say something quippy when suddenly he looked up at Optimus's faceplate. The words died in his intake. Optimus was just staring off into space, his jaw set and his armor held tightly around him. A hot blast of static raced out from the Prime's field and across Starscream's armor. He held Starscream tighter.

"No matter the consequences," Optimus quietly repeated. Starscream remained silent.

Optimus suddenly looked down at Starscream. "How many of his own soldiers did he sacrifice to further his cause?"

Starscream's jaw dropped. There was something foreign and strange and angry in Optimus's optics and that frightened him. He went through all his memories of Megatron on the battlefield, all of the times he tossed his soldiers into the line of fire to create a diversion. All of the times he grabbed ahold of his shoulder and tightened his servo and leaned in and whispered, "I do not care if you get hurt, Starscream. You must feel pain to get power and you must get power so that you can inflictpain—"

"Many times." Starscream whispered. Optimus just held him tighter.

"He would let them burn away, wouldn't he? I have always known that Megatron cared little for the safety of his army… yet I thought that he tried to keep his more valuable soldiers somewhat unharmed at the very least. It would appear that I was wrong. I have always known that he is willing to sacrifice many lives and inflict much pain to achieve his goals… but to know that he was willing to sacrifice you, one of his most important commanders..." Optimus frowned. "How many lives did he throw away in this war? How many of his own soldiers did he let burn up while they were trying to please him?"

"...It is the way of things, Prime. He only cares for his own safety. If you're too weak to defend yourself, then you get left behind. That's how it had been with his other soldiers and that's how it is with…"

Me. The word floated unspoken between them.

"Just get it over with," Starscream whispered.

"Get what over with?"

"My punishment! You know what I'm talking about!" Starscream snapped as he twisted his helm up and finally faced Prime. Optimus's optics widened once he saw the dust covering Starscream's faceplate.

"Starscream, what punishment?"

"Don't be coy with me. I failed the mission, Prime. You and I both know I have to pay for that."

Optimus loosened his hold on him and placed a single servo atop his shoulder. "Starscream, you will not be punished."

"Don't lie," Starscream laughed bitterly. "Just get it over with."

He twisted out of Prime's grasp. He turned around and spread his wings, baring the blank space between his wings home to the delicate sensors and nerves that controlled his wings. Several long dark scars stretched down his back there.

"Starscream, what are you—?" Optimus began. He looked at the scars on his back. He felt the way Starscream shook slightly beside him.

Realization dawned and horror bloomed in Optimus's field. "... No."

Starscream blinked and turned around. Optimus crouched there beside him, his optics piercingly bright and his entire frame stiff.

This was it.

This was the moment Optimus would punish him.

Prime had said back in the cave that he never beat his soldiers, but that was what all military commanders said. It was easy to make promises like that. Just because he said he didn't beat them doesn't mean that he punishes them in other ways. Maybe he threw them. Maybe he withheld energon. Maybe he locked them up. That was how Sentinel Prime had punished his soldiers. Except there was a little voice in the back of Starscream's helm that disagreed with that assessment, a sense that there was something strange and new here that he didn't understand—

A deep and heavy sigh left the Prime's frame as he sat down beside Starscream on the dusty desert floor.

"Do you remember what I told you in the cave?"

Starscream frowned. He didn't like delays. "You said many things, Prime."

"I will never beat you, never. That one simple act of violence is what separates Autobots from Decepticons."

"And I believe you! But Optimus… that's what Megatron said, too. All military commanders say things like that. They say they won't hurt you, and the next moment they—" Starscream bit his lip and turned away. He couldn't do this right now. His frame ached and hurt, everything was dusty, the night was dark and cold, and Optimus was staring at him with those deep blue optics.

Starscream took a breath and began again. "I understand that you don't quite hurt the Autobots the same way Megatron disciplines his soldiers, but you still have to discipline the Autobots somehow. Sure, you may not throw me across the room or crush my spark chamber, but you still have to do something to me to ensure that I do not mess up again! You may be nice to me one day, but… that doesn't mean you'll be nice to me the next day."

Optimus shook his helm and stared off across the desert floor. He was silent.

"...Where did they return to?"

Starscream blinked. "Knock Out and Breakdown? They returned to the Nemesis. Where else?"

Optimus nodded. "Back to Megatron. Do you think he will be pleased with them?"

He could see the scene play out in his processor. Knock Out and Breakdown would both stand before Megatron with their stolen energon. Megatron would look out over it, he'd walk up to them, and he'd…

"He'll be pleased," Starscream said.

"Yes, he will be pleased with them for today. But what about tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow? They'll just try to get more energon for him, what are you talking about?"

"Megatron may be satisfied with their performance today, but they have no guarantee that he will not be kind the next day. He could be cruel or kind to them tomorrow, they do not know. And they will not know how they will be treated for that day. Or the day after that. Or the day after that. Every day is fraught with uncertainty. But not here with us, Starscream. With each passing day you can be certain that you will not be abused or mistreated in any way. My soldiers do not live with that uncertainty hanging over their helm."

It just sounded too good to be true. Every day Starscream wondered whether he'll be in his own berth or the medbay berth when he went to recharge every night.

"That can't be right," Starscream grumbled. Primus, this was confusing.

"It is right. It is the right way to treat your soldiers."

"...Starscream? How many mechs does he abuse?"

"Pfft, he roughens up quite a few vehicons every once in a while. What does this have to do with anything?"

Optimus frowned. "But how many mechs have had their spark chambers crushed in by him?"

Starscream froze. "What? How do you know about that?!"

Optimus leaned back, guilt filling his field. "You sent Ratchet your medical records. He inspected your spark himself. I am sorry that that happened to you—"

"Slag!" Starscream shouted as he punched the ground. That was his secret, his greatest humiliation, one of the biggest things he was hiding from the Autobots. And they knew. They had bared his spark to them, had seen it—

"When did you open me up?! I didn't give you permission to that!"

"Back when you received your helm injury. Ratchet had to ascertain the extent of the damage. It was necessary. I am sorry you feel violated, but it had to be done."

"You opened me up. You looked right into me." Starscream breathed as he crossed his arms over his chestplates. It would've been so easy for them to snuff his spark. So easy.

"I did not actually see your spark, only Ratchet did. But I do not need to see your spark to understand that Megatron has deeply hurt it. You spark will never be crushed by me or any other Autuobot within the base, ever."

Starscream stayed silent.

"...How far has this abuse spread? Has he hurt other mech's spark chambers?"

"No. Just mine."

Optimus's optics widened. "What about Soundwave, Breakdown, or Knock Out?"

"None of them. He hardly beats them," Starscream said quietly. "He never punishes Soundwave at all. He'll punish Breakdown and Knock Out if they fail to get energon. Most of the time he'll forbid them from racing, or give them extra work, but he does nothing too bad to them if they fail. He hardly lays a servo on them."

"...And when you fail a mission?"

Starscream laughed bitterly. "I get all of the beatings they should've gotten whenever I fail. It's all just for me, Prime. Just me."

Optimus was silent for a moment. "He only beats you? Why?"

Starscream scoffed. "What, is this some test of yours? Why not? Somebody has to take the anger."

"...No. The only bot who has to deal with Megatron's anger should be Megatron himself. It is his responsibility to control himself, and if he cannot control himself, he should have no control over other mechs."

"Optimus, it's just…" Starscream couldn't find the words. Why did he get hit and not the others? What made him so hittable?

Starscream let out a heavy vent. "It's just the way of things."

"It shouldn't be. He is cruel and temperamental. But Starcream—"

Optimus shifted and looked over at Starscream, his field dead serious around him. "No matter how bad things may get, no matter how much a mission fails, you will not be beaten or cruelly punished in any way. Not just physically. Do you understand that?"

"But… well… you have to do something to the failures! What do you do with soldiers who have failed?" Starscream snapped out as frustration blared up in his field.

"By doing what I am doing to you right this very moment."

Starscream rolled his optics. "And what, precisely, are you doing to me in this moment?"

"I am helping you."

Starscream just stared at him. His jaw dropped slightly.

"When my soldiers fail a mission, I help them understand what they did wrong and I help them improve. I do not beat them and push them down. I raise them up. And even then, Starscream, it was not your fault you failed this mission. Sheer chance is what failed us here, not you. Do you understand that?"

"You understand," Starscream said flatly as shock fizzled through his field. "You... you understand ."

Optimus blinked. "I am not following—"

"Because Megatron never understood me! Even when it wasn't my fault, even when I tried my hardest, he never understood that it wasn't me that was the problem! Whenever something went slightly wrong, he'd take his anger out on me. Whenever sheer chance got in the way and something out of our control fragged things up, he'd always take it out on me, " he gasped out, the words just rushing out of his intake and into the cold air.

Optimus just stared at him. "So you finally admit that it wasn't your fault that you failed the mission?"

Starscream snapped his intake shut.

"How long have you been lying to yourself, telling yourself that you were the problem, and not him? Is that how you accepted what was happening?"

Starscream frowned and said nothing.

"You don't have to accept his tyranny anymore. Sometimes, you can try your absolute hardest, and you can still fail. And that's okay. That, Starscream, is the true way of things. Not whatever Megatron taught you… Do you understand?"

Starscream nodded slowly as sheer exhausted settled into his struts. The red-hot energy that had propelled him across the skies had finished dissipating, leaving Starscream feeling numb and tired to his core.

"I… I think so," Starscream said. He thought he understood, but he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure of a lot of things anymore.

"But what do you do when one of your Autobots fails not because of chance, but because they did something that is... bad, something that you consider immoral? Even though they know it will upset you?" Starscream said slowly. He thought of Cliffjumper kneeling before him, his blue optics bright with life and his field cocky and arrogant. He thought of how it felt to have his energon slowly leak over his talons as the light from his blue optics died.

"Then I will help them become a better mech."

"Aren't you going to punish me? Make me suffer?" Starscream snapped. "Aren't you going to punish me for killing—"

Starscream snapped his intake shut as the pit of his tank dropped out. He froze as cold dread spread through him. That was the second time he'd made the mistake of bringing him up. The second time his emotions got the better of him and brought the memory of that dead mech back to the surface.

Cliffjumper. The name hung in the air between them, an eternal reminder of an irreversible crime.

"...Aren't you going to make me suffer… for him?" Starscream said softly as his frame tensed up.

"...Starscream, I think you already have suffered for his death quite a lot. His death will constantly hang over your helm and the road to redemption will be a long and hard one. For as long as you are online you must work to redeem yourself for his sake. Do what he might have done had you not deactivated him: bring justice. Bring peace to Cybertron in his name."

They sat there in silence. Starscream felt a hot sting of regret whenever the dead Autobot's name was mentioned, yet he wasn't sure why he felt bad for his death. He wasn't sure if he regretted killing Cliffjumper because it made his life so much more complicated, or if he regretted killing him because he genuinely grieved for the loss of his spark.

Cliffjumper was a mystery to him and now that he was dead, he would never get to know him. The shadow of a dead mech he never knew would constantly follow him.

Optimus just looked at him, his field flowing around him patiently and considerably. Starscream still didn't entirely understand Prime's kindness—but he felt that he understood it just a bit better that night.

He stared off into the night and loosened his tense frame. It seemed he wouldn't be getting another scar behind his back after all.

"Megatron would command you to put yourself in mortal danger for him, wouldn't he?"

Starscream dragged his knees to his chest and nodded.

Optimus let out a deep and heavy sigh. "He left you behind and he hurt you," he said as he glanced over to him. The sun was completely gone now and only their red and blue optics lit up the night.

"This is the second time we've had one of these chats. The second time I've just broken down. It still baffles me that you keep coming back."

"I'll come back as many times as I need to, Starscream. As many times as I need to. Do you want to talk about Megatron?"

He stared off into the night. Somewhere high up in the sky was the Nemesis, endlessly cruising on and on. Somewhere above the earth was Megatron, awaiting his return.

He could picture Megatron. The sight of him standing at the head of the bridge while looking out over the world was deeply familiar to him, yet the idea of actually talking about Megatron, about the way he had treated him, the way he threw him across the room, about the way he had crushed his spark chamber—

No. Not today.

"...Can we just sit here for now?"

Optimus nodded and settled down beside him. They stared off into the night together.


Yes, Starscream would be here. Megatron could feel it in his spark. At any moment he'd hear the roar of an opening groundbridge and at any moment he'd see Starscream emerge around the corner.

Soundwave was concerned. His Lord couldn't just keep wandering through abandoned mines in the hopes he'd stumble across Starscream and the Prime. He stared at Megatron's tight frame and twitching optics. Megatron would not yield to reason, so Soundwave just had to yield to him.

Megatron stared off into the dark, his fusion cannon at full charge, and the warlord wondered. Would Starscream come strolling in, haughty and full of confidence, ready to be struck down? Or would he drop down in terror and immediately submit himself to Megatron?

He did not know. What he did know, though, was that Starscream had to be brought back to the Nemesis at all costs. He wanted to find him, he wanted to take him, and he wanted to ensure that this treachery would never occur ever again.

Prime has taken so much from him. The time has come to take something back.

"Soundwave," Megatron said, his voice booming out into the dark cave.

Soundwave turned to him, his violet visor slowly considering his Lord. He loaded up the image of Optimus helping Starscream down the cliff again. Megatron growled and clenched his fists as wrath filled his field. Even the sight of the two of them together made something deep inside of him scream in rage.

He hated the picture, he wanted to burn it away and make it melt off into slag. But he couldn't do that. He needed that picture, needed the constant reminder of the two traitors to help him keep going forward. He stared at the picture, felt hatred well up in every strut of his frame, and he committed the picture to memory.

Soon he'd see them in person. Soon Starscream and Optimus Prime would come through that groundbridge together. And when they did come through together, Megatron would ensure that they'll never get to be together again.

So he sat. He stared at the picture.

And he waited.