Author's note: Canonish in which Klaus should be irritated that Caroline spitefully undaggered Rebekah, but first he needs to closely monitor the dimwitted quarterback's attempts at courting the vexing blonde. Because that was HIS vexing blonde.
"O, beware, my lord, of jealousy;
It is the green-ey'd monster, which doth mock
The meat it feeds on."
― William Shakespeare, Othello
He had a slack-jawed way about him. Klaus had noticed it from his very first encounter with Matt when he was impersonating Alaric. Also, he had a flat, dull stare. Stupid, inconsequential human.
And yet, Matt had managed to make Caroline smile twice in the space of five minutes. Damn it — three times now. Klaus' gaze flashed an angry gold as he studied the half-witted quarterback further. Absolutely nothing remarkable about the lad. Perhaps he was a shade taller than average? Was that it? Women were genetically predisposed to seek out mates whose characteristics marked them as good providers.
Klaus paused mid-stretch, grumbling to himself. He had no need for such puffery. He already was quite tall. Many members of his village had commented on it. Finally, the useless boy left to perform some menial task in the back, and Klaus casually sauntered over to Caroline, quickly preparing several witty quips for their typical stimulating banter. And he absolutely did not stand on his tiptoes.
Caroline glanced up from her booth, blue eyes wordlessly questioning his presence.
A myriad of clever phrases danced on the tip of his tongue. "I'm above average height for my people." Biting back a groan at his ham-fisted blunder, he couldn't help but add defensively, "And just so you know, humans as a whole were shorter centuries ago."
An awkward silence followed, and Caroline finally asked, "Um...what?" Glancing around Mystic Grill, she added in a hushed whisper, "Local villains don't take the time to deliver a history lesson unless it's in the middle of a diabolical monologue."
Thoroughly charmed, he sat down across from her, replying in an exaggerated stage whisper, "Why are we whispering, love?"
"Because I'm one of the few humans around here who's aware of our town's appeal to certain...outlying groups."
He noted with a pleased smile that her heartbeat was strong and steady — she wasn't afraid of him. What a curious little human. "Actually I thought I'd stop by for a quick chat after your little rebellious act."
He appreciated that Caroline didn't attempt to play coy. Instead, she sat up straighter in the booth, leveling him with a defiant gaze as she scoffed, "It was an act of mercy — something you obviously know nothing about."
He couldn't stop the delighted chuckle that escaped as he observed, "Perhaps it was an act of mercy that led me to dagger my sister, hmm? If anything, you've likely endangered the unfortunate townsfolk with your hasty actions."
Crossing her arms in front of her, Caroline unleashed that fiery temper Klaus had been drawn to from the first moment they met and she threw a beaker at his head in the science classroom, shouting some noble claptrap about keeping his grubby hybrid claws off of her little wolf friend. Tyler had been fortunate Klaus enjoyed bossy blondes. "I undaggered Rebekah because it was the right thing to do! No one deserves to have their life stolen by a selfish asshat."
Shifting uncomfortably, she muttered in irritation, "Besides, she's a passably competent cheerleader and I need her for regionals."
Gray eyes dancing in amusement, he dryly reminded her, "As I recall, my sister attempted to stage a coup within your little cheering tribe, yes? How does that factor into your magnanimous actions?"
Rolling her eyes, she scoffed, telling him, "Rebekah tried to steal cheer captain away from me, but she found out really quick that vampire superpowers only get you so far. And I've been doing gymnastics, dance and cheering since I was a toddler. I'm basically a rubber band with perky boobs."
Klaus choked on his drink, delicious visions dancing in his head. He noted the smugness of her tone and was elated. He appreciated a woman who owned her accomplishments. Clearing his throat, he asked, "And do you believe if the roles were reversed, Rebekah would honor your friendship and do the same?"
Caroline's derisive laughter was unexpected — just like the knowing gleam he saw in her assessing gaze. "Of course not. Rebekah doesn't have friends. But she wants them really, really badly. And she owes me now. I have a feeling you Originals don't take that lightly."
He cocked his curly head to the side, studying her quietly. Quite astute for one so young. Caroline may not know how the world works just yet, but she was well on her way to learning enough to get by. Was it any wonder he was so enchanted by her?
Curse her kind heart. Caroline was at the hospital, visiting Tyler, the idiot wolf who'd been shot by a vampire hunter. The same hospital where they were staging a surprise attack. And not against just any vampire hunter — Connor Jordan, a member of the Brotherhood of the Five. She stumbled into the hallway, clutching a basket of sunflowers with a cheerful polka dot bow, nearly getting her head bashed in by the woefully incompetent elder Salvatore.
With a furious growl, Klaus flashed in front of Caroline, sweeping her out of the way in a protective gesture while soundly tossing Damon into a wall. Favoring her with his most charming smile, he added an extra roll of his tongue as he caressed the syllables of her name. "Hello, Caroline."
Unfortunately, he was so distracted by the surprising blush that graced her cheeks that he didn't realize Stefan had flashed over and punched him in the eye until after he smelled the foul chemicals of hair gel lingering in the air. Snarling, he lunged for Stefan, only for Elijah to shout in warning, "Niklaus!" He turned in time to see Connor rounding the corner with a modified crossbow that shot multiple vervain arrows.
Elijah gracefully dodged the arrows, while Klaus launched a counterattack, mindful of Caroline's location as he hurled the hunter into the far corner. It was quite vexing that he couldn't simply kill the human. But he had no interest in enduring crippling hallucinations for decades while waiting for the next hunter to be called. Also, he intended to thoroughly question the bothersome creature while his witches researched a murder loophole.
Connor clutched a vervain and wolfsbane-laced grenade, sneering at the group as he opened his mouth to make a tedious threat. However, Caroline surprised everyone when she belted Connor with the basket, flinging pollen across his bald head from the artfully arranged sunflowers. Despite his irritation, Klaus couldn't stop the indulgent smile that tugged at his lips as the ferocious little blonde screeched obscenities at the hunter.
"Are you seriously trying to set off a FUCKING grenade in a HOSPITAL?! Aren't you supposed to be on this super noble mission to PROTECT humanity or something? Hello — there's HUMANS in this hospital, you inconsiderate jackass!"
Grumbling at the slack-jawed Salvatores' incompetence, Elijah grabbed the spelled bracelet and snapped it securely around Connor's wrist as he immediately stopped struggling. "Nicely done, brother," Klaus complimented, releasing the hunter who now stood complacently beside them.
Caroline craned her neck to get a better look at the bracelet, curiosity getting the best of her as she asked, "So, besides being a hideous accessory, this thing makes people less homicidal or something?"
"The Bracelet of Obedience is a useful tool Kol commissioned some of his acquaintances to create for...prickly situations such as this," Klaus explained, watching how Caroline's clever brain clearly was filing away more questions to ask later (or more likely research on her own as she was rather stubbornly mistrustful).
As though finally making up her mind about something, she replied with a nod, "Okay, well, based on that super unimaginative name, I'm guessing that tacky thing is a gross violation of some UN human rights treaty."
Klaus braced himself for one of Caroline's signature indignant tirades, but she surprised him yet again when she shrugged her shoulders to add, "But since he was the evil jackass who shot Tyler in a room full of people AND then tried to throw a grenade in a hospital, I think I'll just call it a night."
Klaus exchanged an amused glance with Elijah as they watched Caroline roll her eyes, sighing dramatically as she lamented, "And if you can try to keep your supernatural shenanigans to a minimum this next week that would be really helpful — finals are coming up and I need to study. Plus, there's this stupid research paper I need to do on Salvador Dalí's first Surrealist phase and I'm going to be reduced to Googling if all these inconvenient distractions keep coming up."
As she turned to walk away, Klaus hastily followed her, calling out, "Actually, love, as it turns out, I was quite instrumental in Dalí's first Surrealist phase." Flashing her a dimpled smirk, he offered, "It would be my pleasure to offer my expertise."
Caroline paused, biting her lip as she considered his offer. "Fine. But somewhere public and well-lit with lots of witnesses."
"It's a date, then," he confirmed, feeling absurdly pleased with himself.
"Not a date," she retorted with a final toss of her blonde curls.
With a skip in his step, he returned to Elijah who was ordering about the idiot Salvatores to transport Connor back to their dungeon for proper questioning. His brother paused, eyes twinkling with mirth as he lightly said, "Taught Dalí, did you?"
"Yes," Klaus replied stiffly.
"In 1920s Paris."
Exasperation colored his tone as Klaus asked, "Yes, Elijah, what of it?"
Snickering, Elijah smugly retorted, "In the 1920s, you remained stateside, and had a particular fondness for Chicago as I recall."
Ears reddening, Klaus muttered, "Perhaps I should Google a few things then."
