A/N: Hi, everyone! Here is another chapter. Let me tell you the flash backs to the newborn stage it brought me with Jack haha. Also, I live in New York and have no clue what the actual laws in CA are. I'm making them when I need them to be for the story.
Thank you for the reviews and for reading! The goal is to finish up this fic by Christmas so fingers crossed I can find the motivation and time.
Enjoy!
April 24, 2005
Angel Grove, CA
Due to having an emergency c-section, the doctor requested that I stay the entire three days in the hospital. It was nice having the extra time with the nurses to show me things I didn't know how to do. I struggled with breastfeeding. It seemed no matter what I did, Lily did not want to latch on to me. After a day of struggling, I opted to give her formula. I was sad as I felt like I should have been able to do this but the nurse explained that with all the trauma my body has been through, it's common for this to happen. It bothered me for a while but in the end, it was nice to see Lily be able to eat and get what she needed. Plus, it was easier for me with the c-section to feed her in my lap with a bottle than it was to hold her up to my chest. It also gave Tommy the opportunity to feed her when I was sleeping or needed a break, something he was more than willing to do.
I sent my mother to my house on the second night. She was hovering so much when everyone was there and when they had left to make sure I didn't tell Tommy anything that it was making my blood pressure rise. I suggested she go home to make sure everything was alright and that Marci was able to get to school in the morning. Spring Break had ended and she was in the last part of the year. It was important for her to attend every day to make sure she was prepared for final exams. It was a good cover up and excuse just to get her the hell away from me. I still hadn't decided what I was going to do and she wasn't helping matters much as it was.
On the morning of the third day, I woke up to Tommy feeding Lily by the window. He looked tired, making me wonder if he had been up all night with her. He had been quick on the uptake of doing the night shift even though I told him he didn't need to. He said it was okay though and I could tell he felt more relaxed without my mother here as well. Thankfully, I had lost the IV last night and was feeling less sore this morning. The door opened and Dr. Amankwuah walked in.
"Good morning!" He said, his accent thick with cheerfulness as he smiled. "How are we feeling today?"
"Pretty good." I replied.
"Excellent. The nurses monitored your vitals all night and everything with you and the baby looks good. I will be discharging you this afternoon unless you have any concerns." He smiled. I shook my head.
"No. I just can't wait to be home in my own bed."
"That's what everyone says. The nurses will go over some safety things with the both of you that are standard for all newborn discharges. The baby and you will have a follow up appointment in three days with me. Please remember to take it easy. It's common for new moms to push it too much and tear something. I don't want to see you back here in the ER because of. Only lift the baby when someone is home for the next six weeks. After that, I'll clear you for normal lifting. Dad will be home with you, correct?" He asked, looking over at Tommy.
"Yes." Tommy replied, nodding. "And when I'm not, someone else will be taking my spot."
"Excellent. If you need anything else or have any questions, don't hesitate to call our on call number at any time. Take care." With a wave, he walked out of the room. I looked over at Tommy who was putting Lily back into the bassinet.
"Did everyone sign up for a shift with me or something?" I asked, eying him. He grinned, walking over to the chair next to the bed and sitting down.
"Or something. It's just when I have classes. Besides, Trini took time off of work for this anyway so I'm sure she will be around a lot to help out." He let out a yawn, covering his mouth with his hand.
"Tommy, you don't have to stay up all night, you know? I am capable of helping out when the sun goes down."
"I know. It's just you did all the hard work already. I figured you could use as much rest as possible right now."
"Thank you. I appreciate it." Smiling, I patted his shoulder. The door opened again and the social worker, Tina, came in. Tina was a woman about my age with long blonde hair she kept in a ponytail high on her head. She smiled when she walked in, seeing that the baby was sleeping. She had a folder in hand and she pushed the table over the bed for me before setting the folder on it.
"Hey, guys. Just heard you are being discharged. I just have to go over a few things with you prior to your release." She opened up the folder. "Before you leave, they are going to make you watch a couple safety videos. They are about safe sleep habits and working as a team to ensure the baby is safe. They can be a little much when you watch them but it's just to make sure everyone is safe and that more importantly, the baby is safe. There's some informational packets in here about each video. Once you watch them, you'll sign some stuff for our records."
"Okay." I said, adjusting in the bed.
"Also before you guys leave, we will do a carseat test. I know that Tommy, you brought one in earlier, right?" She asked. Tommy nodded, pointing at the corner where the carseat was sitting on the vent. "All we do is make sure the baby fits, you guys know how to buckle her in, and that the base is installed correctly in the car. Someone will walk out with you for that." She flipped over a couple of pages. "You already have your appointment for later this week for your follow up. All that's left is the paperwork for the birth certificate." She reached into the folder and pulled out a piece of cardstock with a pair of footprints on them.
"Aww!" I said, smiling. She returned the gesture.
"We also make a keepsake for our parents to bring home. Her hand prints are also in here as well along with a card with her birthday and birth information. Now, according to California state law, because the two of you are not married and Tommy wishes to sign the birth certificate as the father, I need to ask a few questions." Worry built in my chest.
"Why?" I asked, sitting up straight.
"It's just how the state handles births to parents who aren't married. I'm not sure why but old laws tend to follow this." She explained before turning to Tommy. "Tommy, are you signing the birth certificate willingly and not by coerce of another person or party?"
"Yes." He replied. She checked off a box.
"Do you take responsibility as this child's father in the eyes of the law?" She asked. Tommy smiled, nodding.
"I sure do." She let out a chuckle as she checked off the second box.
"Do you wish to have a DNA test?" She asked. My heart pounded in my chest at the question. Was it necessary? Did he need to have one done to list himself as the father? I hadn't considered the fact that it might be something they required at birth.
"No. It's alright. I'm her father." Tommy replied without batting an eye. Tina crossed off another box and pulled out a piece of paper.
"I apologize. I know the last question is a bit personal but our policy makes us ask it. Since you declined, just sign here so we can keep it on file. You wouldn't believe the number of people we get who sign the birth certificate and then later on down the line decide they aren't meant to be daddies and want out. This just protects us from those daddies who claim they were forced." She slid a piece of paper and a pen towards him and Tommy signed it quickly.
"I'm not changing my mind. I'm in it for the long run at this point." He said, giving me a wink that made my knees weak.
"I'm glad to hear. Last but not least, what is the baby's full name?" She asked, looking at me.
"Oh. Well, it's Lily Rose." I replied.
"Okay. And last name? Will she be taking Dad's last name?" She questioned. Glancing over at Tommy, I watched as he sat forward.
"It should be Hart." He said, smiling. "That way the both of you can have the same last name. It'll just make things easier for now."
"For now?" I asked. He shrugged, grinning at me.
"You never know what the future will bring, I suppose." The look he gave me told me that he was talking about our future together. It made me wonder what he thought of when he thought about us later on down the road. Did he see us getting married? Changing Lily's last name to his once that happened, thinking we would be a complete and happy family?
"What about Hart-Oliver?" I asked. "She can have the best of both worlds that way."
"Lily Rose Hart-Oliver. I like it. Has a ring to it." Tina said, smiling at me. Tommy nodded.
"I think so too."
"Okay. I think that's everything. I will hand all this in. The nurses will be in for the rest of your discharge stuff shortly. If I don't see you before you leave, I wish you both the best of luck!" She closed the folder, taking the papers she needed. With another wave, she was gone.
As Tina had said, a nurse wheeled in a TV cart a short time later and we watched several videos about baby safety. There was one about co-sleeping and the risk of SIDS that scared the hell out of me. There was also one about shaken baby syndrome that made me bawl like a baby. Afterwards, we signed the paperwork Tina had mentioned before and the nurse told us to get Lily dressed to go. I had packed an outfit I bought a month ago in our bag, a pink dress with white pants and a white and pink bow for the top of her head. She wasn't too thrilled about being in clothes but she looked adorable. I also put some mittens that matched her pink socks on her hands to stop her from clawing her face with her nails.
Once she was dressed and ready to go, I got myself ready. I had planned on wearing a cute outfit as well but the act of pulling my underwear on proved to be too painful as it was. I opted to pulling sweats and one of Tommy's t-shirts on instead, the loose clothes feeling better than what I had packed. When I came out of the bathroom, a nurse was waiting for us to do the carseat test. It took a little bit of practice to get her in and figure out the straps but once we did, she fit in there perfectly and quickly drifted to sleep. They made me sit in a wheelchair while Tommy carried Lily's carseat out of the hospital to my waiting car. He had swapped them out, thinking it would be easier for me to get into. He put Lily in with the nurse watching while I climbed into the passenger seat. The nurse reminded him to drive carefully before bidding us farewell. Tommy climbed into the driver's seat and put his seat belt on.
"Are we driving home to a house full of people?" I asked, gazing at him. He shook his head.
"I think it's just Marci and your mother there right now. I told everyone that we needed a bit of time before people came over. Is that okay?" He asked. I nodded.
"That is more than okay."
When we pulled into the driveway of the house, I noticed that my mom's car wasn't there. As I climbed out, Tommy grabbed the still sleeping Lily from the back seat and our bag. I offered to carry one but he shot me a look like I was crazy. I shrugged my shoulders and headed towards the front door. To my surprise, the door was locked when I turned the knob. Was no one really home? I took my keys out and unlocked it. As I pushed the door open, I saw two people scramble up from the couch. I realized that one was a teenage boy I didn't recognize. The other was Marci who was quickly buttoning up her shirt.
"Marci!" I exclaimed. She let out a nervous laugh as I felt Tommy tense up next to me in the doorway.
"I didn't think you'd be home so early. Your mom said something about dinner time." She said sheepishly as blood filled her face, turning it red. Her "special" friend was nervously standing in the doorway of the living room, shuffling from one foot to the other. He had mousy brown hair that was in his eyes, him needing to brush them out of the way every few minutes. He had on jeans that looked like they belonged to his sister and a t-shirt with a band logo on it. There was also a silver ring pierced into his lip that stuck out like a sore thumb.
"Sorry. I don't mean to be rude but I usually like to know the people before they stick their tongue down the throats of the teen girls in my house." I said, glaring at the boy. "Who are you? How old are you?"
"Kimberly! Relax. We weren't doing anything! This is Joshua. He's in my grade." Marci said, trying her best to give me a look to tell me to calm down. It did quite the opposite.
"Terrific." I replied. Tommy set the car seat on the floor and put our bags next to it.
"Listen, Josh. Can I call you that? I'm going to." Tommy said, stepping in front of me. "We just got home from the hospital and Kim just had a baby. Now is not the best time to get into all of this teen angst. I suggest maybe heading home and giving it a couple days before you give Marci here a phone call." He put a hand on his shoulder, taking a firm grip. "How about I give you a ride home?"
"N-n-no. I've got my board." Josh stammered out, pointing at a skateboard that was propped up next to my front door.
"Look at that, Kim. He has his skateboard. Isn't that great?" Tommy asked, looking at me over his shoulder.
"Sure is." I replied. Tommy led Joshua by the shoulder over to the door, letting him grab his skateboard. Josh looked back, giving Marci a wave and a smile before realizing I was still glaring at him. He scurried out the door and Tommy closed it behind him. Crossing my arms, I turned back to Marci.
"Look, I know I fucked up royally. I shouldn't have done this. It was stupid of me. I'm really sorry. One thing just kinda led to another. Nothing happened though. At least not as bad as you're probably thinking. I swear on my life." She said, giving me a pleading look. I sighed, letting my hands drop to my sides.
"I am too tired to go all Mom on you." I said. "But for the love of God, if you get pregnant, I will kill you."
"I'm not that dumb." She scoffed, rolling her eyes as she walked over to Lily. I heard the baby make a noise as she opened her eyes. "Why, hello there. Welcome home, Lily." Marci bent down and undid the buckles. Carefully, she stood up and pulled her from the seat. She sat on the couch, cradling her in her arms.
"Never a dull moment." Tommy said, winking at me as he grabbed the bags. "I'm going to run these upstairs and start a load of laundry. Do you want some tea?"
"At this point, I wouldn't mind going back to the hospital." I muttered, sitting on the couch.
"I'll get the tea." He said before disappearing into the kitchen. I shifted to face Marci fully.
"Well? Are you going to tell me more about Mr. Romeo?" I asked, leaning into the back of the couch. She smiled rocking Lily in her arms.
"We've been dating for a couple weeks now. It was nothing serious but he told me today that he wants to go exclusive now. So, I guess I have a boyfriend."
"That's exciting. Our little Marci is all grown up." Tommy teased as he walked back in, carrying two mugs of tea. He handed one to me before sitting in the chair across from us.
"Oh ha ha." She said, rolling her eyes. "Are you excited about being home?" I nodded, sipping the tea.
"I'm looking forward to sleeping in my own bed."
I clearly jinxed myself. I realized this as time passed and night fell. Lily did pretty well, sleeping and eating on and off throughout the evening. Marci and Tommy helped with lifting her and changing, Marci changing her first diaper. But bedtime came for Marci and she headed to her room. I bid Tommy good night as well, heading up to my room. There, I saw all the presents I had been given at my baby shower I missed. They were tucked in one corner while the bassinet was set up next to my bed. I feared she was too small for the crib yet and I wanted her closer to me so I could see. I fed her a bottle and she fell asleep around ten. A feeling of accomplishment hit me as I set my alarm for three hours for her next feeding.
But then I tried to set her down and she screamed.
And screamed.
And screamed.
Every time I set her down, it was the same thing. I tried to rock her back to sleep or feeding her but she wasn't having it. I made sure she was dry and that she wasn't warm. As 2 am came crawling near, I was beginning to worry that something was wrong with her. Was she sick? Was she hurt? I rocked her and paced around the room with her but she still cried. Soon, I joined her in crying. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I set her down in the bassinet. I didn't know what was wrong. I did everything that I had been taught at the hospital. I was beyond frustrated and was at a loss at what to do.
"Kim?" I heard a voice say as there was a light knock on the door.
"Yeah?" I whimpered. The door opened and Tommy stuck his head in.
"Is everything okay?" He asked. I shook my head.
"She hates me Tommy." I cried, tears streaming down my face.
"What are you talking about?" He asked, coming into the room and shutting the door behind him.
"I can't get her to calm down. She won't sleep. She won't stop crying. I don't know what is wrong. She doesn't like me." I said, near sobs.
"Hey. You know that's not true." He said softly. He bent over and picked up Lily who was still crying in the bassinet. She had worked out of her blanket I had wrapped around her and her little face was red from crying. As soon as Tommy picked her up, she calmed down. Figures. She likes him more than me. This was the universe's revenge for lying to him. She was more drawn to him than me because he was her real father even if he didn't know it.
"She'd rather have you." I whispered, feeling ashamed of my jealousy. Walking over, he sat down next to me.
"That's not true." He said. "Let's try this. The nurses showed me this the first night when you were still sleeping." Setting her on the bed, he unwrapped the blanket and then swaddled her in it tightly. She wasn't able to wiggle out of it, unlike mine. Her wide eyes looked from him to me before he picked her up again. "Here." He held her out to me and I reluctantly took her. I felt her squirm but not as bad as it had been. I put the bottle to her mouth and she ate a little bit of it. As she drank, she started to drift off to sleep.
"Once she's fully asleep, try putting her down. They like to be wrapped up tightly when they sleep." He said, standing and heading towards the door.
"You can't leave!" I said, panic in my voice. He stopped, looking back at me. "Tommy, please stay in here with me tonight. I know that you are probably tired but I don't know if I can do this without you."
"Let me get my things and I'll be right back in." He disappeared for a moment while Lily finished her bottle. She was in a deep sleep now, her breathing even as her little chest rose up and down. He returned, his pillow and comforter in hand. Standing up, I carefully set her down in the bassinet. She didn't stir any, continuing to sleep. I smiled, clasping my hands together.
"She's asleep!" I whispered. Tommy gave me a quiet high five before setting up a makeshift bed on the floor.
"I told you that you'd be able to do it. She just didn't want to be away from you." He whispered. I sat back down on the bed, pulling the covers down so I could climb in. Tommy laid down while I turned off the light. Laying down, I rested my head on the pillow. The floorboards creaked as he adjusted on the floor.
"Tommy?" I whispered into the dark.
"Yeah?" He replied.
"You can sleep up here if you want to." I said. "It's better than the floor." He paused for a moment.
"Are you sure?" He asked softly. I nodded, forgetting he couldn't see me.
"Yeah. Plenty of room." I heard him stand up and walked over to the other side of the bed. I moved the covers down and felt him slip into the bed next to me. He pulled the covers up and rolled onto his side, keeping a good distance between us.
"Good night, Kim." He said.
"Night, Tommy."
