Mario Wars
Chapter 2
Darth Vader is sitting in a dark room. All of his clone troppers are stationed behind him. He is watching a gigantic screen with Mario on it, acompanyying Obi Wan, Han Solo, and Chewbacca onto the Millenium Falcon.
Darth Vader: So, it appears that Mario is here at last.
Commander Lucas: Sir, don't you find this a little strange?
Darth Vader: You mean besides the fact that you're completley naked?
Commander Lucas: Well...it is casual Friday.
Darth Vader: Yes well, anyway. What should I find strange?
Commander Lucas: Well sir, Luke Skywalker dies, but Obi-Wan just happens to find a new Padawan just like that...It's just...strange.
Darth Vader; Don't you worry about that Commander Lucas. I have no worries about Obi- Wan's new Padawan.
Commander Lucas: I see. Is there a reason?
Darth Vader: You see, Commander...Mario is an idiot.
Commander Lucas: Mario? How do you know his name?
Darth Vader: Oh, Mario and I go way back.
Darth Vader pulls out his lightsaber and slashes off Commander Lucas' arm.
Lucas; AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE HELL, MAN? DAMN IT!
Darth Vader: Oh, sorry. It's just I hate that Mario...I want him finished.
Commander Lucas screams some more and then dies from severe blood loss.
Darth Vader: COMMANDER GEORGE!
Commander George: Yes sir!
Darth Vader: Bring me my iPod
Commander George: Um, sir. iPods wont be available in this Sector of space for another...
Darth Vader shoves his lightsaber up Commander George's ass.
Commander George: OH MY GOD! THE PAIN!
Darth Vader: Imbucile! Don't you ever question me!
Commander George: YES, MASTER SKYWALKER!
Darth Vader: YOU FOOL! I AM NOT ANAKIN SKYWALKER! HE'S DEAD!
Darth Vader picks up Commander George and gives him to a Wookie.
Darth Vader: Take him to the Rape Room.
The Wookie holds Commander George upside down by his ankle and carries him off, screaming for release.
Darth Vader: DOES ANYBODY ELSE WANT TO CONFUSE ME WITH ANAKIN SKYWALKER!
Clone Troopers: NO SIR!
Darth Vader: Good. Now then, I want Mario here at the space station. Wherever he is headed, I want his course altered so that he ends up here.
Mario: (on screen) Hey old man, where is it wer'e headed.
Obi-Wan (on screen): I told you 23 times now! Wer'e going to the Death Star!
Mario: (on screen) Oh...cool.
Darth Vader: Hmmmmmm...
Commander Gerald: Um, sir. It seems Mario is headed here to the Death Star.
Darth Vader: Gee, thanks for the update Commander.
Commander Gerald: Why thank, you Master Va-
Darth Vader slashes him with a lightsaber.\
Darth Vader: Bring me the prisoner!
A Clone Trooper brings Princess Liea to Vader's throne.
Darth Vader: Hello, my lovely.
Princess Liea: What do you want?
Darth Vader: Just to tell you that your brother Luke...yeah...he's dead.
Princess Liea: What? NOOOOOO!
Darth Vader: I know you're mourning the loss of your brother. If it makes you feel better, we can get nude and kiss passionatley in front of all my Clone Troopers, who will then take digital pictures and post them on Liea: NEVER! YOU KILLED MY BROTHER!
Darth Vader: I did not! A rock fell on him! Damn, blame the galactic overlord for everything!
Princess Liea: OH MY GOD! MY BROTHER'S DEAD! OH GOD!
Darth Vader: Look, bitch... Are we gonna kiss or not?
Princess Liea: NO!
Darth Vader: THEN AWAY WITH YOU!
Princess Liea is grabbed by her ankles and dragged out of the room.
Commander Bob: Um, sir. Readings show that the Millenium Falcon should be within a five mile radius of the Death Star in about 10 minutes.
Darth Vader: Ha ha ha ha ha ha...That's right...come to me, Mario. Come and meet your doom!
Who is this new threat who claims to have old ties with Mario? He says he isn't the Anakin Skywalker that was the original Darth Vader...So who could this new guy be...There's only one way to find out...Tune in for more Mario Wars!
