CHAPTER 5: We are all but fractured humans…


Asuma was able to take the first shift after three rounds of rock, paper, and scissors against Genma. He understood the reluctance. In a group of three, no one ever wanted to choose the middle shift. Ever.

Anyone would think that being shinobi for years would have them develop magical sleeping habits—like being able to sleep in a snap of a finger. Well, they could but…quality sleep is quality sleep, and truthfully speaking, that was difficult to achieve during middle shifts, especially in alternating rounds of two hours or less.

Thankfully, luck was on his side that night and he'd soon get his well-deserved, undisturbed shut-eye until the end of Kakashi's shift. But since he's up first, he'd have to stand guard for two whole hours. And so, Asuma positioned himself at a place where he could calmly watch over Genma and Kakashi while keeping an eye on their surroundings.

He even lit a cigarette as he leaned back on the rough bark of one of the many trees surrounding them and casually enjoyed the intake of smoke that warmed his lungs as he enjoyed his peaceful starry view.

The night was quiet except for the chirping and churning sounds of the nocturnal insects that were out and about. This was a good sign actually because it meant that the weather was going to be great and that their surroundings remained undisturbed—when out of nowhere, something felt amiss.

Asuma stood alert, the ash from the tip of his cigarette falling as he looked around, feeling for some other chakra signature other than his team's but there was none. He knew they were safe within that part of the forest as they were still within Konoha territory but the nagging feeling at the pit of his stomach refused to disappear. It was making him restless.

He widened the scope of his chakra detection and scoured the forest floor and up the trees but he still got nothing. There was really no one but his team in that area of the forest. There was Genma's chakra, soft and warm like a calm fire and…

Asuma's face suddenly scrunched as though he accidentally bit the side of his cheek. He finally figured out where the problem was.

He couldn't feel Kakashi's chakra and Kakashi was never known to have a weak chakra signature.

Asuma quickly darted across the forest floor and grabbed one of the portable solar lanterns they brought. He swiftly leapt from tree to tree to where Kakashi was and the closer he drew near, the heavier his steps felt and the painful churning in his stomach grew.

Among all of the Konoha shinobi he knew, Kakashi had the most distinct chakra signature because his always felt electric—like the air surrounding him always felt charged and exhilarating, and he only ever concealed it to a null during undercover missions…but that wasn't the case now and there was absolutely no reason for Kakashi to conceal his presence.

Which means…

"Kakashi! Kakashi!" Asuma frantically called as he felt the bitter bile from within him continuously rising especially when he received no response.

'How heavy of a sleeper could he fucking be?!' Asuma thought and he did pray to the gods that maybe, just maybe, his friend was only deeply asleep, but he couldn't stop gritting his teeth as the nervousness and anxiety swiftly ate on him. And when he finally reached Kakashi and knelt down in front of him, lifted the lamp that he was holding to shed light on his friend's face, Asuma almost dropped his only source of illumination as he cried in despair because of what he saw.

Kakashi was no longer breathing.

He was as still as a marble statue with his lone, glazed eye partly open and he actually felt hard and cold to the touch.

"GENMA!"

Asuma frantically screamed for Genma's name as he lifted Kakashi's limp body over his shoulder and brought him to the ground.

When he landed, he immediately brought Kakashi and laid him down near their bonfire to better assess his situation. Genma was already up and alert and was actually poised for a brawl but when he saw what the commotion was all about, terror shrouded his features as he knelt opposite Asuma and tried to make sense of what was happening.

"Wha—how? What happened, Asuma? Talk to me." Genma urged as he watched Asuma call for Kakashi's name over and over while shaking their friend's limp body.

"I don't kn…He's not breathing. But there's no attack. We're the only ones here. I don't…I d-don't know what happened."

It was the first time Genma saw Asuma get flustered and shaking. Hell, he also was. His fingertips were cold and he couldn't push down the dread from deep within his stomach. But this was a crucial moment for all of them. Genma knew they had to get their bearings together to save Kakashi. And so he held onto Asuma's shoulder hoping that he could transfer an ounce of whatever strength he still had or at least share and absorb the gripping panic that the both of them were feeling.

Asuma looked at him with a steadier gaze than before as though the hand over his shoulder really did give him strength. He nodded once as a silent communication transpired between them and unzipped Kakashi's vest to expose their friend's clothed chest. Asuma also pulled Kakashi's mask down to check if there was even the faintest hint of breathing but there was really none.

Once again, the fear returned as Asuma shook his head and looked grief-stricken at Genma. And so, the latter did what he had to do. He decided to perform CPR.

"Dammit, Kakashi! If you don't like grown men giving you mouth to mouth, you gotta wake up!" Genma gritted in between chest compressions and giving Kakashi rescue breaths.

He applied all the things he learned at training and from Shizune but Kakashi still wasn't responding. He tried once, twice, thrice, and several times more until he finally decided to stop.

"Why are you stopping? We have to save him! Move!" Asuma yelled and took over Genma's place but he stopped when he saw Genma bring out a senbon.

"W-what are you planning to do with that?" He asked worriedly.

"It hasn't been that long since you found him like this. If Kakashi's still alive, he will definitely respond to this. We'll have to jumpstart his heart in hopes that it'll wake him up. It's acupuncture. There's no time for the details." Genma explained as he looked at Asuma dead set in the eyes.

"You're not going to kill him, are you?" Asuma asked.

"If Kakashi's already dead, that would really be impossible."

"Genma…"

"Shh! Trust me. This is me and my senbon we're talking about." Genma confidently said as he motioned for Asuma to move out of the way so he could stick his senbon in the middle of Kakashi's chest.

Asuma did as told and waited patiently as he trusted Genma to perform his expertise.

"Better be ready, Asuma. We don't know what's going to happen next." Genma cautioned as he poised the sharp end of his senbon at the center of Kakashi's clothed chest.

With one steady movement of his hand, Genma pricked Kakashi's chest as though he was sticking an incense stick firmly on the ground.

Whatever happens next will determine their fate. Will they be bringing home a body instead of scrolls? Will they break out in tears of sorrow or joy? No one really knew.

Unfortunately, the next thing they saw was something that not one of them ever expected–it was the blurry swipe of a kunai and Genma's senbon flying at them, and a sleepwalking image of Kakashi who was poised for an attack.

"Shit!"

"Fuck!"

Both Asuma and Genma swiftly scrambled to their feet as they placed a little bit of distance between them and Kakashi who, fortunately was still alive, but was now out for their necks as he relentlessly attacked them with his sharp bladed weapon.

Nobody really knew what was going on but the sharp clang of metal against metal could be clearly heard in the middle of the dark forest floor.

The skirmish went on for god knows how long because how the fuck could someone who was half asleep and almost dead to the world be so agile and strong and take on two elite shinobis?! Oh yeah, this was Kakashi they were talking about…but something was seriously wrong here! Genma thought as he ducked and dodged the barrage of attacks Kakashi let loose and so did Asuma.

Kakashi wasn't even using any jutsu for crying out loud, yet the both of them were having a really difficult time.

If it was anyone but Kakashi, they were sure that they'd already put the guy down and sent his soul to the underworld but maybe it was also the reason why both him and Asuma were holding back their attacks.

Kakashi was definitely deprived of reason and they didn't want to make things worse.

"Kakashi! Kakashi! Wake up! Wake the fuck up!" Genma yelled at him as he landed on his back with a thud while he blocked Kakashi's kunai from piercing the middle part of his eyes.

"Asuma! Grab him! I know what I have to do!" Genma called out and that's when Asuma, who had just been wiping off the blood trickling down his nose, jumped at Kakashi from the side to tackle him and wrestle the kunai out of his hands.

"Hold him steady!" Genma bellowed when Asuma was able to pin Kakashi face down on the ground.

Asuma grunted as he held Kakashi firmly in place. A warm gush of blood was still dripping from his nose but he refused to let go of Kakashi's wrist lest the latter begin his rampage again. This gave Genma the opportunity to stick a fresh senbon on the side of Kakashi's neck which eventually stopped all movement from their teammate and friend.

"Did you kill him?!" Asuma accused Genma as his grip on Kakashi's wrist loosened.

"What?! No! It's for waking him up."

"I thought the first one was for waking him up?!"

"I thought so too. I guess I was wrong."

Asuma growled at Genma but then Kakashi began to stir from where he was lying face down on the ground. He tried to get up, pitifully cradling his head with one hand while he had his other palm on the ground for balance.

"W-what happened?" Kakashi asked in a whispered daze, eyes blurry and unfocused yet still searching for answers. Unfortunately for him, the only thing he saw were Asuma and Genma standing before him, tense and alert as though preparing for another onslaught of attack.

When Kakashi tried to ask if they were attacked, his vision suddenly turned upside down which lurched him forward, almost kissing the dirt but still managed to scramble to his feet towards the nearest bush where he ripped his mask off and deposited the bitter contents of his stomach.

In the middle of it, Kakashi somehow got glimpses of what took place and figured out that they were attacked…but it was him who attacked his friends.

Asuma and Genma exchanged bewildered looks as they listened and waited for Kakashi to get his bearings together. It took Kakashi a minute or two to relieve himself of the nausea until there was nothing left but dry and painful heaving.

This wasn't the first time they saw this happen to their friend (minus the sleepwalking with intent to kill). There were a handful of missions they did together where they found Kakashi escaping in the wee hours of the morning to throw up and return as though nothing happened.

They didn't mind it the first few times, simply attributing it to a hangover of sorts or food poisoning–because this was Kakashi they were talking about. The shinobi that couldn't be fazed. But now they knew that they were probably wrong and that they should've probably done something much sooner.

Asuma took a deep cleansing breath and slowly released it before walking towards Kakashi. Genma, on the other hand, went to grab their water bottles. Hell, they all needed a drink after what had just transpired.

Genma gave one to Asuma who in turn handed it over to Kakashi as the latter tried to reign in his labored breathing while he washed his mouth with water. Another flask was handed over to Kakashi. It had tea in it and was known to calm the nerves down and so he took it as well.

Asuma observed their silver-haired friend and noticed that even when there was nothing more to hurl, Kakashi was still shaking as though he had undergone something absolutely terrifying. So he reached out a hand and firmly clasped Kakashi over his shoulder.

"Hey. C'mere. Stand up. Look at me." Asuma ordered. "Look at me Kakashi and repeat after me, you hear?"

Kakashi weakly nodded and faced Asuma. He still couldn't look at his team captain directly, afraid that his vision might flip again so he was trying his best to be very careful and very still while he repeated all the words that Asuma said.

"I'm a shinobi of the leaf."

"I am a shinobi of the leaf…"

"I'm on a mission."

"I am on a mission…"

"It was just a nightmare."

"It was just a nightmare…"

"I'm okay."

"I am okay…"

"I need to get help."

"I need to get…No."

Kakashi eventually straightened up and looked at Asuma. He was thankful for what he did because it did help him compose and re-orient himself but he refused to heed the last bit of advice that Asuma said.

It didn't even matter if it was an order from his team captain. Regardless if they were in the middle of the forest or not, he doubted that anyone could ever help him. Ever.

"Kakashi…tell me that this is the first time and I'll let you off." Asuma said in a serious tone. Kakashi was tempted to lie just to get Asuma off his back but he couldn't find it in himself to do it because somehow he knew that his friends knew more about what was going on with him than he does.

"I do appreciate that you were able to wake me up but like what you said, it was just a nightmare."

Genma had to immediately step in because neither of his friends seemed to want to back down, and so he broke the tension by clasping both Kakashi and Asuma in the shoulder and steered them back towards the bonfire.

Asuma looked towards Genma with a slightly worried frown but the latter dismissed such worries with a light tap on Asuma's shoulder as he spoke.

"Don't worry, Kakashi, sometimes I get the nasties too. We all do. But you're okay. You're going to be fine. But it would also help if you share. You wanna talk about it?" Genma good naturedly asked as the three of them settled once again around the still-burning bonfire, giving them both warmth and illumination as the two shinobis studied the dim features of their silver-haired friend.

Kakashi had completely forgone his mask for the night which made studying his expressions a little bit easier. At least that's what Genma and Asuma thought as Kakashi seemed to ponder what to do or say next.

They weren't expecting much because they knew how their friend behaved. Always the recluse. Always the secretive one. That's why when Kakashi opened his mouth, Asuma and Genma made sure to listen.

"I don't…I don't really remember the nightmare. I knew I was awake, at least I thought I was but I couldn't stop myself from attacking." Kakashi confessed. "I thought I was just defending myself. Everything was so dark and I was struggling not to die…"

For a brief moment, everything fell silent as the midnight breeze blew and only the rustle of leaves and the chirping of insects could be heard.

What Kakashi told them wasn't much but it sure felt heavy. Heavy and disappointingly relatable that it made Asuma and Genma's stomach churn with discomfort. Then, with a sigh, Genma spoke.

"It's suffocating, isn't it?"

"Just like watching yourself dying but you can't do anything about it." Asuma added.

Kakashi simply nodded. Hell-bent on still keeping the most horrifying parts in especially since he couldn't help but notice that his friends and all the other shinobi he knew–though they claim to have nightmares too, were all fine–so why wasn't he?

Was it the years of indifference towards his own feelings that made him like this? Did cramming every moment of guilt, shame, and helplessness deep within until it lay buried and forgotten fractured him as a human?

Kakashi wasn't completely devoid of feelings so as not to recognize that he was suffering. He was just too stubborn to acknowledge the fact that perhaps he really needed help. Or maybe he was just a masochist, pure and simple. Maybe he just refused to admit that he was enjoying the agony, the loneliness, the misery…

He honestly didn't know. However, there was one thing he did want to know. And so he asked…

"Does it get better?"

Asuma looked at him meaningfully and for a brief while Kakashi saw a little bit of sadness in his team captain's eyes but eventually, it was replaced with a small smile with a comforting gaze.

"It does…for most people. Though truthfully speaking, it may take a lot of time." Asuma answered.

"I guess I'm not most people." Kakashi murmured when he suddenly received a slap on the back from Genma.

"Don't say that. It's only difficult now because you're still just a baby. Our jounin baby brother." Genma quipped with a wide smile, trying his hardest to make the mood lighter but Kakashi only frowned at him as he spoke.

"You talk as if you're a hundred years older."

The senbon wielding shinobi simply shrugged.

"I might as well be. A few shinobi years ahead of you is like equivalent to a hundred years of experience!" He confidently said.

"Then why do you suck as a ninja?" Kakashi asked.

"I do not suck as a ninja!" Genma said full of indignation. "Wait…do I really? Asuma?"

"Sorry, Genma. Gotta side with Kakashi on this one." Asuma said while giving his friend his most pitying look.

"Bullies. Both of you." Genma pouted though he really hoped to the heavens that his teammates were just joking. "Reallyyy?"

And with that whiny tone, Asuma couldn't help but snicker.

"Don't be an idiot. Shizune wouldn't have looked your way if you sucked."

"Yeah, I knew that. Just wanted to make sure, especially since Kakashi said it. Thank heavens I was born earlier because if things had gone differently and Kakashi became my sensei…holy hell, I might have ended up bald or something."

"Genma, if you had become my student, I would've failed you faster even before your hair started falling out."

At that point, the three of them couldn't help but chuckle at the simple thoughts of what ifs and what could have been. Trust Genma to effectively make the mood lighter after every near death experience and trust Asuma to have everyone's back no matter the situation.

When the midnight chuckles and laughter died down, Kakashi couldn't help but sigh.

"I'm really sorry about what happened. I really am. I didn't mean to…I was…"

"S'all good." Asuma assured him. "Just please don't scare us like that again. We thought you were dead but you almost took us both down in your sleep. Almost."

There was a faint smile on Kakashi's lips as he looked down at his hands and then towards their small bonfire. There were a lot of things running through his mind that evening but he knew that he'd have plenty of time with his thoughts soon.

"You two should probably go ahead and get some sleep. I'll keep watch." Kakashi suddenly offered.

"You sure?" Genma asked.

"Yeah. I don't think I'd be able to get some shut eye after what happened."

Asuma and Genma shrugged but both of them shuffled on either side of Kakashi as they took their place on Kakashi's opposite sides and made themselves comfortable.

"You really don't have to keep an eye on me. That's my job. I'm fine and again…I'm sorry."

Asuma and Genma looked at one another before the former's hand reached to ruffle Kakashi's hair.

"Well, there's no hard feelings, Kakashi. Just know that we got you. Always." Asuma assured him as he shuffled closer towards Kakashi. Close enough to touch shoulders and share the rough bark of the tree where the two of them were currently leaning on.

"Oh wait, I gotta get something off my chest." Genma suddenly quipped. He was already lying on his back at that point but decided to roll over to his side to face Kakashi.

"When we were trying to wake you up but you wouldn't budge, Asuma and I both gave you mouth to mouth. But don't worry. We didn't use tongue."

Kakashi slowly looked at him, his lone eye sharp and unflinching but Genma was waiting for a tic to develop as he forced himself not to laugh at the silver-haired shinobi's machine-like turn of his head.

"Really, Genma? Really?" Asuma complained.

"What? I'm just saying! At least he won't be surprised about two grown men appearing in his dreams and giving him smooches."

"No wonder I had this sudden urge to attack you guys…" Kakashi said, which made the other two shinobis burst out in laughter.

They were joking and laughing now but if he wasn't partnered up with them and if it were someone else, maybe there'd already be a body count.

Truthfully speaking, Kakashi still felt a little pissed and embarrassed with himself. His night terrors were getting out of hand and it almost cost him a mission and two very good friends.

Kakashi knew that he needed to get his shit together to see this mission through. After all, it was only a simple scroll retrieval to the borders and back. Nothing could possibly go wrong with that. And no sleep? He had gone without sleep far longer than an average shinobi could withstand so two more days without it wouldn't really be a problem.

Besides, there were more pressing matters to think of like a certain pink-haired kunoichi waiting for him at home. Had she made up her mind already about the thing they had discussed before he left? Kakashi could only wonder.

Surprisingly, thinking about her brought him some semblance of calmness and relief. And so, as he sat by watching and as his teammates slept soundly, Kakashi brought out not his usual smutty, orange book but the confidential scroll of checklist and proceeded to decide what he would do next the moment he gets home.


The second Sakura woke up, she was already feeling giddy. Giddy and extremely excited because finally, Kakashi will be coming home, and finally, FINALLY, she'd be able to test the thing that Ino taught her.

Though her medic brain refused to digest all the things her blonde best frenemy enlightened her with, because truthfully it didn't make any sense whatsoever; the thought of Kakashi coming home still made her feel unusually happy!

Sakura knew that it wasn't like this before–back when she was still a wide-eyed, whiny chuunin. Because Kakashi coming home from a separate mission meant back to a rigorous amount of training for Team 7. But that wasn't the case now as she stared at the familiar note on her bedside drawer. Looking at that piece of paper still made her blush from embarrassment but, oh well, they at least gotta get somewhere.

"Oh, Kami. Is this how it really feels like to be in a relationship?" Sakura grumbled as she pushed herself off her bed and proceeded to get ready for the day.

Though Sakura was groaning and whining upon every step, she still couldn't wipe the goofy smile off her face, and that sheepishly dreamy smile remained as she reported for work and traversed the antiseptic smelling hallways of the hospital for her daily rounds. Even the hospital staff was looking at her funny because there were way more sparks and enthusiasm on her steps as she went on with her work.

'If I knew that this was what it was like having a boyfriend, I should've gotten myself one waaaaay earlier.' Sakura muttered to herself as she scanned her clipboard of patients to examine for the day.

'Wait. Would it even be the same if Kakashi wasn't my first boyfriend?' Sakura thought as she tapped the end of her pen over her chin when her clear green eyes suddenly went wide.

'Holy hell! I just referred to my sensei as my boyfriend!' This sudden realization made Sakura drop her clipboard in the middle of the ward's semi-busy hallway, which startled everyone within her proximity but she didn't mind and simply picked her clipboard up and went on with her way as she continued her internal battle with herself.

'Okay, fine. Mission boyfriend. And we've been in a contract relationship for several days already. I should really probably get used to calling Kakashi-sensei my boyfriend since we already had a handful of…uhh…sexy moments together. Maybe I should also prepare a contract or checklist before the month ends? Uhh, just to set the terms and conditions for whoever's gonna come next…'

"Uhm, Haruno-sensei…is everything okay?" Asked the civilian patient on the bed with his left foot propped up and wrapped in a cast. The patient just couldn't help but get worried as he watched the myriad of emotions flash through Sakura's face while going through with his check up.

"Haruno-sensei?" He asked again.

"Huh? What?"

"Uhh, I asked if everything was okay?"

"Oh, yes! You have nothing to worry about Ito-san." Sakura laughed awkwardly as she was obviously caught daydreaming during work hours. So she simply made sure to guarantee her patient's well-being because god knows what her patient saw in her face while waiting for her feedback.

"Your leg's going to heal in a few weeks time–bones as good as when you were in your 20s since our talented medics are going to take care of your injury, Ito-san. Just make sure not to go traipsing around the roof again when you get drunk or you won't just end up having broken bones. Got it?"

"Y-yes, Haruno-sensei. Thank you very much."

"No problem! Have a great rest day, Ito-san. See you in a few days." Sakura cheerfully greeted him before bidding him farewell.

Thankfully, the hospital wasn't in hectic mode though there were people who were rushed in every once in a while because of minor injuries–probably obtained from preparing for the Firefly-viewing festival to take place in a few days, but that was all there is to it. All in all, Sakura felt that it was going to be a great day as she proceeded to go to her office to focus on the leftover paperworks since she was done with her rounds for the day.

'Perhaps I should go get coffee first…' Sakura pondered though in truth, if she were to get coffee, it would be her third one out of many. But that's okay. Coffee was life. And she needed a good shot of caffeine boost if she wanted to get any deskwork done.

Yep. She felt unusually motivated but she also just wanted to get the day done and over with so she could patiently wait for Kakashi in peace.

'Soon, he'll be home.' She whispered to herself again with a shy smile when suddenly, she noticed a crowd of frantic, lab coat-wearing personnel on the emergency entrance which could be seen by anyone who was on their way to the cafeteria.

All of sudden, the hallways were filled with the ringing sound of the emergency alarm which signaled a high-alert situation. With Sakura's medic mode kicking in, she promptly dashed towards the panic-stricken crowd, coffee completely forgotten as she mentally psyched herself up for the emergency…but there was no preparing her for what she saw the moment she got near.

Asuma-sensei was the first familiar non-medic personnel she saw, followed by Genma, then her shishou.

'Their home! Kakashi-sensei's home!' Sakura excitedly thought but…where was he? She needed to see him! She needed to know if what Ino told her worked. But she felt an entirely different feeling the moment she laid eyes on Kakashi.

Sakura's footsteps halted and when she was able to move again, her first few steps were slow and heavy and it was as though everything around her seemed to move in slow motion as well. She was watching the distressed frenzy with hawk-like eyes, trying to absorb what was happening but she just couldn't seem to focus. It was like her brain suddenly broke into millions of tiny fragments and was in the middle of repairing itself, which caused her to lag behind.

She honestly thought that that day was going to be a wonderful day. Hell, she woke up with great skin and shiny hair and felt so awesome that she believed she could take on anything that day.

Unfortunately, it looked like the universe was adamant on playing games with her as the image of Genma and Asuma-sensei both covered in fresh, crimson blood slowly passed by her and her shishou frantically motioning for her to follow.

She couldn't do anything but watch them all. Their mouths were open and their lips kept on moving. It looked like they were saying something, talking to her probably, but despite how much she strained to listen, she couldn't hear anything except for the high pitched ringing in her ears as she watched the man in the gurney being wheeled further inside the hospital.

Sakura knew that man. She'd recognize that shock of silver hair anywhere even when it was tainted with mud, dirt, and blood but her mind refused to register the state he was in. She had never seen him like this before. With or without a medic, he never came home in such a condition.

Whenever he returned home from a mission with an injury regardless of how grave it was, whether his guts were about to spill or he was suffering from a minor sprain, he'd always come seeking her out and it would always be those times whenever she was out of the hospital.

He'd catch her on the training ground, outside the bath house, in the library, in the middle of the market, anywhere really, then he'd greet her with a slightly perceptible smirk and that infuriating eye-crinkle of his and he'd drop that cheerful 'Yo.' before asking her to treat him because he always preferred to be healed anywhere else other than the hospital.

So what was he doing now? He had always, always hated hospitals so why was he being wheeled inside? Where's that familiar eye crinkle? Where's his one syllable greeting? Why is he covered in so much blood? Why wasn't he moving? Why can't she feel him?!

All these dreadful questions and a lot more were running inside Sakura's mind which effectively paralyzed her in place, and it was only when a distraught nurse bumped her in the shoulder did she return from her shock of watching Kakashi being wheeled further in.

Sakura began gasping for air and it was only then did she realize that she had stopped breathing. Then, out of nowhere, both her palms flew to her face as she slapped herself to attention because it wasn't the time for her to have an anxiety attack. Kakashi was waiting for her. He needed her to heal him like she always does, and that was what she was going to do…even if it meant bringing him back from the dead.


A/N: Hello! Not sure if anyone is still reading this but I have come back from the dead and I do still want to see this story through to the end. I apologize for the long hiatus. It's just that…this year hasn't been good to me and I honestly found it difficult to write about love and healing when I couldn't even do it myself. Hoping that as I write the last few chapters of this story, I'd eventually learn to accept that some wounds really can't be healed and that it's best to just move on from it no matter how difficult it may be.

Just like what Asuma-sensei said, 'it does get better…it just takes a lot of time.'

So if ever you come across this story and this note, know that I wish you genuine happiness and peace.

It may never come for me but that won't stop me from hoping for the best for others.

Thank you, as always, and see you in the next chapter. :)