Hurt - Chapter 12
Rated: T
Offering
Chapter Summary: Kirby offers Splinter a place to lay his son to rest and hopefully for them to forgive his daughter.
Splinter seemed to be the least surprised by April and Kirby's sudden appearance; at least, he hid it the most.
Donnie was more or less just numb from the whole experience and how he'd treated her that night he took her home. Sure, he felt bitter at the fact she was the one who was there when his brother took his last breath; going as far as understanding Leo's anger toward her because it was her inaction that caused his brother to lose his life. Yet he did regret how he'd treated the broken girl, but it was because of her that his brother wasn't here anymore so he had ignored that second of regret that night even if it still left a hallow pit in his stomach. This was a girl who normally had him smiling for no reason and now her presence felt completely different. The strong urge to be with her vanished overnight and he'd become numb to those freckles, pretty blue eyes and easy smile.
When she suddenly showed up to the lair out of virtually nowhere, he was a bit taken aback. She looked incredibly thin and just as tired as he felt; bloodshot blue eyes with large purple bags underneath was not the look he accustomed with her. April was broken; like a frail china doll who'd shatter to pieces with the slightest breeze, much like his heart. Yet, the pity and love he once felt for her was gone the night his brother died; he could feel nothing more than pain and guilt; grief that encompassed his heart in its icy grasp. Donnie knew deep down she didn't mean for any of this to happen, like most tragedies, it just did; so while he no longer blamed her over it, it still hurt just the same.
As so why she was here he still didn't know...
The genius thoughts were torn away the instant Mikey wiggled in his arms, the thinning terrapin pressing himself further into his older brother's plastron. Michelangelo murmured nonsensical words in his sleep but they sounded so incredibly sad regardless; even in deep slumber, Mikey was still dealing with the effects Raphael's death caused them. The youngest would wake from nightmares several times a night, screaming out his brother's name, sobbing and begging for him to be there when he awoke. Sleep provided no comfort that it should have for he awoke to an even drearier reality where he'd truly never see his brother again. Taking a deep soothing breath, Donnie focused on comforting the youngest even if it wasn't one of his strong suits; praying silently for whatever God was listening to give his little brother sweet dreams; to give him at least some comforting respite in pleasant memories; an escape from this hell that reality could never offer him again.
April, seemingly ignoring his distressed appearance, walked over to where he sat the couch and gingerly lowered herself next to him; careful to give enough space to not warrant invading his personal space. A sad smile lifted the corners of her mouth but he'd never seen a more forced smile as her sad blue eyes took in the scene of Mikey hugging Donnie in sleep and the older turtle seemingly allowing him to do so. Their eyes met for a few seconds, but no words were exchanged between them; a silence enveloping them as Donnie took a curious glance to her father, who continued to the hallway; his steps quiet as he entered the darkened dojo and out of Donatello's sight.
The elderly rat's back was ramrod straight as he sat in front of the underground tree; it's branches ghosting over the monumental ceiling and its roots strongly attached to the ground below.
Incense burned lowly from where Splinter sat in front of a row of pictures. Two of the images had occupants Kirby did not recognize from this vantage point; a black and white family portrait of a man and woman holding an infant; the other just a simple sepia toned portrait of that same woman from the previous photo, and the last one a face he knew well - Raphael - an out of focus, slightly blurry image of the red-banded terrapin from what appeared to be taken at least a year ago was surrounded by an old black wooden frame, the gold trim scratched and dull.
It was obvious the older rat sensed the middle-aged man's presence before he had even entered the room but made no move or said a single word to deter Kirby's continuation toward him.
Kirby O'Neil stood about five feet from the rat's turned back before he sat on the floor to await and see what would happen next; allowing Splinter to approach him and wanting to respect the ninja warrior in his Japanese customs April had told him about. The redheaded man sat silently awaiting Splinter's acknowledgment, which took longer than he was accustomed to.
Splinter let out a deep breath; he wasn't sure what April's father was doing here...
He'd wondered for many times these past days why the young woman didn't show up or call; he worried momentarily for her mental health. Deeply regretting making her leave when she was obviously in as much distress as they all were; maybe even more so because she was there when it happened. His son dying in her arms without any way to help him...completely hopeless as he took his last breath in her grasp. His heart ached for a moment as he recalled his beloved Teng Shen dying in his...no one should have to experience something so incredibly traumatizing. If his Raphael had died in his, Splinter knew for a fact he would have completely lost his mind to grief... While regretful of how he treated the young woman, he was just confused and wanted Leonardo to return so badly that he made that rash decision without fully thinking it through...he still felt lost...
Sensing Kirby sitting down, he knew the human would not leave, so wanting to discuss whatever he came for, Splinter reached for the incense, nipping the burning wood between his fingers to put it out in a puff of scented smoke.
"May I help you, Mr. O'Neil?" Splinter asked; turning around and sitting across from April's father.
Kirby awkwardly bowed from his seated position and Splinter was a bit taken aback when he saw fresh tears clinging to the blue eyes of the man in front of him. "I-I'm so sorry for your loss, sir...Raphael was a really respectful child; always kind to my April and myself. I-It's just horrible what happened." the human spoke softly after rising from the bow, hand running timidly along his balding head.
"I appreciate the condolences and...yes...yes, it is..." Splinter replied, swallowing down a sob that wanted to escape and his heart lurched at how difficult it was becoming to reign in his emotions.
"I-I can never make up for your son saving my daughter's life."
"You don't have to make up for it...It was his choice." Splinter reaffirmed; he himself still dealing with that fact.
"I know that, sir, but I - "
"Yoshi."
"Yoshi, I... I-I know about your struggles and April told me how you plan to bury him in the sewers but I..."
"Understand that we do not have any other choice, Mr. O'Neil."
"Kirby. Please..j-just Kirby."
"...Kirby," he sighed, "..It is our burden as a family and I told Miss April that we'd call her before any final arrangements are made, so I do not understand why she came. She didn't need to for we wouldn't have a funeral without inviting her."
"Thank you for that, si- Yoshi. But, I came to you to talk about that."
"..." Splinter's brows furrowed as he heard Kirby's words wondering where on Earth this conversation was headed.
"I don't want you to have your son's resting place to be in the sewer."
"Kirby...You must understand we have no choice. We are not a part of your society; we are mutants and more importantly, we are ninjas, born and raised in the shadows and we have no access to your graves or anything of the sort. It is our burden we must bear." Splinter reiterated, his paws shaking from having to discuss something so painful with a man he'd only met a handful of times.
"...but you don't."
"...what do you mean?"
"I have a place for you - for him - your son, Raphael."
"..." Splinter said nothing but his silence was enough of a cue to have Kirby continue.
"It's called Northampton; it's a farm I inherited from my father; it's been in the family for generations. Best part, it's not too far; just located a couple hours north of here. Beautiful farmhouse in the woods and I own most of the land around it. It's secluded and private - while a little rustic and needs a bit of upkeep, it's beautiful."
"Mr. Kirby, we are survivors. We always have been, a handout is not something we -"
"Please." Kirby said, pulling out the deed to the house and land from his pocket, the folded, worn piece of paper presented to the elderly rat. "It's not a handout, Yoshi. I wouldn't disrespect you or your family like that... What your son has done for me could never be repaid... I have no idea the hell you are going through...I lost my wife too but I can't even imagine the agony of losing a child like how your son died, but I thought that this may ease it...if only a little. It'll give you a place to bury your son; a secluded area that you're free to roam and not worry about anyone or anything bothering you. You could stay at the house and visit him whenever you want; you can even live there if you wish - i-it's yours."
"..." the mistiness built in Splinter's eyes as he forced himself to turn his eyes to the floor in fear he was going to break down.
"Please... We're both parents. Your son saved my little girl...this is the least I can do for you...for him. So, please...just take it. It's yours; I-I want you to have it." Kirby reiterated, hands slightly shaking as he continued to hold out the papers towards him.
Closing his eyes, Splinter felt a trail of tears leaking from his eyes and a sturdy five-fingered hand upon his shoulder. "D-Does it have water?" Splinter asked, his voice breaking but he didn't care anymore.
"Yeah, it has a few large lakes nearby and lots of little creeks and streams."
"Heh..." Splinter said and a sad laugh left his mouth as he wiped his face of tears but to no avail as they kept coming. "He always did love to swim..."
"..Then I think he'd really like it there." Kirby reiterated, valiantly keeping his own emotions in check as he watched this father fall apart. Knowing how easily they could have changed places that night had this man's son not protected his daughter.
"I think he will..." Splinter whispered, reaching for the worn piece of paper before giving him a teary smile. "You don't know how much this means to me and my family...Thank you, Kirby."
Kirby didn't reply with words, just squeezed his shoulder and exchanged a shared look of grief; he stood to wobbly legs and left Splinter in peace.
"Come on, April. Let's go." Kirby said, walking out into the living room area.
Without replying, April gave a sad smile to Donatello before standing to her feet and followed her father out of the lair where the purple-banded turtle watched them leave with confusion over what just took place.
Splinter's steps were heavy as he walked into the lab, the cold instantly seeping into his skin but his fur kept him warm. He walked the distance to a metal gurney, a body wrapped in a white sheet that was pulled back to reveal his son's lifeless face. The father did not bother hiding his tears; the warm trickles of warm water rolling in torrents down his cheeks and a few trailing off his whiskers as he looked upon his deceased child. One paw rested atop his Raphael's still chest, the other upon the curve of Raph's frigid forehead, gingerly brushing his claw in a caressing motion over the grayish-green skin and frayed edges of the red mask that adorned his face.
Long minutes were spent just looking at his dead son; the pain and agony like burning coals in his stomach. Willingness to do anything to trade places with him but knew it was futile. It was a pain akin to nothing he'd ever experienced even if a great burden had just been lifted from him. Splinter feared there would be nothing that would dull this ache; the pain of loss and just how much he missed him so overwhelming it almost caused his knees to buckle underneath him.
"Do not worry, my son...you'll be home soon." he whispered brokenly, leaning down to give his cold forehead a lingering kiss before covering him back up. The elderly rat headed toward the exit of the lab and froze near the door, looking back at the gurney where his son lay. "I love you so much, Raphael..." he whispered, standing there for a long time before finally turning off the light and closing the door on his way out.
