Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion or any of its characters. If I owned them, I would be living in an isolated Caribbean island with my beautiful girlfriends and a butler called Alfred.
If we all had a purpose in life, we would not live.
Of Lies and TearsChapter Three
Night had passed, the day had come. Silence everywhere, as if a silent prayer was being cast by the mourning Earth. Destruction and death still reigned, but amidst despair, hope could be found. For there is no end, no closure of fate. There is only a new beginning. A chance to repair all former mistakes, a chance of redemption…
As long as the Sun, the Earth, and the Moon exist; everything is going to be okay.
Asuka opened her eyes. "So the world never stops spinning, huh?" An ethereal glow covered the shambles of former Tokyo-3. All that could be heard was Silence, no birds to sing, no leaves to rustle with the wind, no Misato to scream in a drunken ecstasy. No nothing. "Maybe not." Asuka looked at her side. There he was: Shinji.
The boy slept in peaceful slumber, a content smile playing on his lips. His arms were sprawled over his eyes, trying to protect himself from the pervading light. But it was futile, and soon Shinji groaned in complaint, rolling himself over and over again only to end up face to face with the sand. Shinji's brain started to process the potential risk of inhaling it. " Shit, can't breathe. Wake up!" The boy coughed and sputtered as he rose from the treacherous bed. His entire face was covered with sand and the boy, blind, tripped himself, falling with a comical 'thud' to the ground. Asuka smiled.
Shinji slowly lifted himself from the embarassing position, brushing away the sand which had covered him. As he opened his eyes, he noticed that morning had come. "Strange," he thought " everything looks so different when light is cast…It looks prettier." He glanced at Asuka, who was still smiling. "I never saw her smile before…"
'Hey, Shinji. Get me something to eat. I'm starving, you now.' The girl whined.
'Okay, Asuka.'
Being ordered around didn't seem such a bad thing. In fact, as he set out on his newly assigned task, Shinji couldn't help but grin. He didn't know why, but he felt happy. Yet, he needed to find something edible, soon, or his happiness would come to a bitter end as an appetizer to a certain fiery girl who waited for him at the beach.
He found canned food in a local store. Now, let me stress this, it is a remarkable thing indeed. For who would have guessed that after the End of the World, a store would keep its structures to conveniently serve two famished 14-years old children? But I'm wandering off too much. A/N: Ignore this, please
Back to Shinji.
The boy struggled to carry the valuable goods in his arms, while keeping an eye at the road in which he was travelling. He had brought some Western pancakes, as he knew that Asuka would surely appreciate them, along with some things he deemed necessary: blankets, two tents, pans, water.
Shinji looked at the sky. It felt so relaxing, to walk in an empty path, without any concerns about time or other people. It was simply he and himself, and Shinji was uncommonly content. Lightly humming the Ode for Joy, the boy made his way back to the beach. Where Asuka was waiting for him. Impatiently.
'What took you so long, huh?' she screamed 'I was by myself in this awful place and where were you?'
'S-sorry, Asuka. I was getting food for us. You sent me to fetch it, remember…?' he mumbled.
Asuka's face suddenly grew softer. 'I did, didn't I? So…what'd you get?'
Shinji promptly set down the things he had brought. Nothing fancy: some rice, ramen, water, instant meals that could be easily cooked. Asuka saw the pancakes. She smiled inwardly. "Ha, there I go again. Doing that an awful lot, lately…"
The boy prepared a simple meal to eat. Gloating over it, the children were quickly satiated. Bellies full, lost in a dizzying feeling of fullness, they lay on the sand. Next to each other.
'You know, Shinji.' Asuka whispered. Shinji looked at her 'Has it ever occurred to you that we may be the last people in this world?'
Shinji was silent.
'It's horrible, you know. Not to know what can happen tomorrow, what the future holds for us. It's so uncertain it frightens me'
But then, when was life ever certain…?
'I guess there's nothing left to us but to live on.' She sighed.
Shinji remained silent. He was gazing at the clouds moving across the blue sky, abiding to the course of the wind. Everything looked so simple up there: there was always a definite course for them, there was no possibility to choose one thing or another. There was no choice to make, no consequences to pay.
"If I could become one of these clouds, then maybe I wouldn't have to worry anymore. Of course I wouldn't feel any happiness, but at least I would have no more responsibilities. Free of the burden of living. Free of everything…" He looked at Asuka. " But I wouldn't have met her. Or any of my friends. I wouldn't have felt joy or sadness, hatred or love. I guess life is worth living for."
'Maybe not, Asuka…' he whispered. The girl looked at him as he stood up. 'We still have each other, that's supposed to be something, right?' he smiled. Asuka blinked in surprise, but soon recovered her composure. She looked at him as he went down to fetch the tents and prepare them for their use. After all, dusk was starting to fall and soon they would have to sleep.
Asuka looked in interest as Shinji tried to arm the tents. Sweatdrops were starting to form in his forehead as he struggled to finish the shelters. "They are small…" she noticed. " And thin. It's not going to trap the heat inside well."
The moon had started to rise in the horizon when Shinji concluded their improvised residences. His shirt was drenched in sweat and his breath was coming in ragged huffs, but the boy seemed proud of his work.
'Hey, Asuka! We don't need to sleep on the sand anymore. I've got us some tents.' He exclaimed enthusiastically. Asuka rose from her throne of sand to observe Shinji's accomplishments. Two simple camping tents with zipper doors and no cushions beneath. Nothing too fancy, at least to the girl's standards.
'I guess it will work…for now.' Asuka said. She swiftly examined them, taking mental notes as to their size and shape. Finally, she chose the bigger one to herself, 'That's mine!', and entered it without second regards to Shinji, who stood dumbfounded.
Old habits die hard…Shinji removed his shirt and shoes, walking over to the shore where small waves of LCD crashed upon. Submerging his feet under the red liquid, Shinji reclined himself over his arms. He closed his eyes and sighed, as thoughts wandered in his mind.
" What are we going to do, now? No one has returned from There yet, and it doesn't seem very likely that it will happen. This is the End of everything I knew before. No more Evangelions, or Angels, or friends…But at least I have Asuka.
Are you happy?I think I am.
Are you really happy?Yes, I am.
Then why are you so lonely?I'm not lonely anymore. I have Asuka. That's all that matters to me. Before, I could walk into a crowded street and find myself lonelier than ever. No one would look at me. No one would care about me. I could die and they wouldn't give my body a second glance. Because I would be worthless to them. But not anymore.
Really?Yeah. I need her. And she needs me. Nothing else matters. The world may be destroyed, but we still have one another. What else could I ask for?
You've grown, Ikari-kun.
Ayanami?
Correct, it's me. I've came to visit you, Ikari-kun.
Why?
To see how you were fairing in this world. But it seems to me that everything is going accordingly, and little is left to change. Humanity will soon reconstitute itself from the primordial sea, and a new beginning will dawn to Earth.
I'm glad. But, Ayanami, when will you come back?
Don' worry about this, Ikari-kun. You will find me, someday…and until that day, I will wait for you...
'Hey, baka Shinji!'
"Huh?"
'Hey, Shinji! Answer me, you moron…!'
Asuka was growing concerned. He had stared at the sky for such a long time, lost in his thoughts, that she thought she had lost him. He didn't move or talk, only his regular breathing indicated any sign of life. He seemed to be in a completely different realm of reality. And she didn't like it. It was as if he were going far away from her. Leaving her behind. Alone.
'What were you thinking about out there, Shinji? You kinda worried me' She sat besides him.
'S-sorry Asuka, I didn't want to worry you' He stood up. 'I'm tired. I'm gonna sleep now. G'night Asuka'
But as he started walking towards his tent, he felt a hand tugging at his pants. He looked curiously at Asuka.
'What's the matter?'
'Can you sleep with me tonight? It's so cold when I am there, the blankets won't help'. A faint blush could be seen across her cheeks. 'Please. I don't want to be alone anymore.'
Shinji blushed. Nervously, he nodded his head.
Both of them entered Asuka's tent, arranging themselves as comfortably as they could. Shinji tried to keep a distance from her, but in the tiny space, that was practically impossible. Defeated, the boy lied right next to her, with his back facing the girl.
He was almost sleeping when he felt arms around his waist. Asuka moved closer to him, leaning her head on his neck and hugging him tightly. Shinji was in the verge of a nervous collapse when he heard a soft whimper.
'Don't leave me…alone…it hurts'
Tears sprouted from her eyes and small sobs escaped from her throat. Sadness consumed her as memories of a solitary childhood flashed through her mind.
So fragile…Shinji covered her arms with his own, holding her hands next to his heart. He understood her pain, her grief. He could help her…
' I'm here, Asuka. I'll always be here. We will never feel lonely anymore.'
She smiled.
We have each other. That's all that matters.
A/N: I personally liked writing this chapter. In the middle I was stuck, but then Inspiration bestowed its gift upon me. Tell me what you think. I listen to reviews. Don't try calling me on the phone. That's why we have e-mails.
