I really like the way this story's going.

I'm glad my reviewers like it so much too!

Disclaimer: The usual, not mine, never will be, stop rubbing it in.

Warning: Slash hints

After RENT: Our Story

Chapter Four: Here to Help

ROGER'S POV

I didn't think it would be this hard. I really miss her. I'm lonely at night, the bed is way too big. I've been thinking of getting a smaller one, I'm too depressed to do it though.

I haven't been playing any songs but one: my tribute to Mimi. I know the band worries about me. Mark says they called a few days after the funeral, I missed a practice and they got worried since I didn't call. He told them I was still upset and tired, to not expect me at any practices for a few more weeks or so.

He's really been taking care of me. Making sure I eat, reminding me to take my AZT. He makes me talk to him about it. He does more of the talking, but I replay when he asks a question.

I cry a lot and I try to keep Mark from knowing. I play my cds to block the sound. Marks knows anyway. He'll open my door and pull me to my feet, clutching me to his chest. Every time I cry, he'll hold me and tell me everything will be okay.

God, I miss Mimi. My beautiful, loving Mimi. I see her in my sleep, when I close my eyes. Lately, I've been thinking her I loved her more than I thought I did. But then I look at Mark and years of feelings rush to my stomach.

I want to tell him every time he hugs me that I love him, every time he wipes my tears I want to take his hands and kiss them.

"Roger?" A knock follows Mark's voice and he opens my door. I look up from the paper I've been staring at for the last hour, attempting to write a song. He smils and crouches down beside me. I give him a small smile. "How are ya feelin'?"

"No different than what I have been." He nods.

"You've been shut in your room all day. I was making sure you're okay." He hugs me. "Collins just called. He's coming over."

"Cool." He smiled and leaves my room, disappearing into his own. I pull a shirt on and sit at the table. He comes out of his room, camera in hand. After RENT became a hit, he started filming everything that's happened since. He says he's making a sequel. He filmed the band getting our first award, his premier of RENT will be edited into the movie, Mimi's funeral, everything big that's happened.

"Smile." I look into the camera's lens and give a big false smile, before shaking my head. "Roger finally left his room after a whole day."

"I miss her, Mark." He nods, his eyes sad.

"I know, Roger, I know." He shuts the camera off and sits next to me. I start to cry and he wraps his arms around me. "Roger, don't cry. Everything will be okay. IT always turns out okay."

"I know." I whimper, gasping for air. The sobs soon stop and as always, Mark wipes my eyes. "Since when did I become such a baby?" I laugh softly.

"Since you started to not close off like always?" He asks me sarcastically.

"Keep that up and I won't talk anymore at all." I joke back, punching his arm. He rubs it, pouting. I laugh harder, my sorrow forgotten. He laughs, happy that I'm happy. "Thanks for everything Mark." I say, like I always do when he makes me feel better.

"I'm always here for ya buddy." We smile and in an instant I decide to tell him. I open me mouth, my mind creating the words. I see them, but before I can say them, the phone rings. We snap our heads to the phone as Collins speaks.

"I'm here! Throw a key down you two." Mark stands up and throws a key to Collins. I know the magic is broken and I don't think I'll ever have the balls to tell Mark how I truly feel about him. And for the first time in my life, I wish Collins hadn't come to visit.

Really short chapter, I know. Oh well!