Wow. So I totally suck. I've been so lazy with these, and I'm sorry about that. I was out of town for a little while, then just busy, and then I found myself battling some writers block. However, I'm back. And I've decided to continue this. Past this chapter. Reason? I love it. Maybe that's why it took so long for me to review…I didn't have an idea of how to extend it, and didn't want to be done with it. Just kidding. But anyway…here's your new chapter. It's kind of short, but I wanted to get an update in so you'd know the new turn it's taking.

Meredith

Meredith stares at Derek in increasing shock. All that no pressure talk, the first date jokes…all of that was shot to hell.

But he'd been…so perfect. He has a knack for that; saying the most perfect romantic thing she needed to hear and sweeping her off her feet.

But what happens after the sweeping? That's what concerns Meredith. She has so much doubt…there are so many issues she needs to deal with. That's why she wanted to start slow.

So how is she supposed to make up her mind now?

Yet another part of her wants it so much. Wants exactly what he'd said, to have a promise that she would get to spend the rest of her life with Derek…nothing could be better than that.

"Meredith?" He shoots her a lopsided smile. "Is this just the shock value or should I take this as a bad sign?"

She forces a weak smile. "I just…I don't know, Derek. Not that it's not…it's just so fast."

He nods slowly, his eyes giving away a tiny bit of disappointment, but not much surprise. "Hey, that's okay, Mer. I understand. I guess I just…" He trails off, shrugging.

"Hey, you know I love you."

He smiles at her. "I know."

"Can I just…" Is she really prepared to say no to that? "Can I think about it."

He grins. "Sure. So that's not a firm no?"

She laughs, taking his hand and pulling him standing. He wraps his arms around her waist and kisses her, long and hard. Catching her breath when he pulls away, she tells him, "Few more of those might help you out." She keeps her face straight, but her eyes are dancing with laughter.

"Well in that case…" He grins, waggling his eyebrows at her suggestively. "How about we continue this first date back at the trailer?"

"As tempting as that sounds…not tonight, okay? I kind of want to think about some things."

"Of course." He heaves his shoulders in mock disappointment, but smiles at her. "No problem."

XXXXXXXX

Meredith returns home later to find the house empty, much to her irritation; she's looking forward to telling her friends everything and asking Izzie and Christina for help in sorting out the very conflicted thoughts she's been having on the issue.

She dials Christina's cell phone, but gets no answer, which isn't unusual; Cristina generally forgets to charge it. Izzie's is plugged up on the kitchen counter, which leaves her out of contact.

Restless, Meredith decides to change out of the dress and go look for them. It isn't until she gets to her bedroom and opens a drawer that she remembers all her clothes are somewhere between Seattle and Boston.

Considering taking something of Izzie's, she ultimately decides not to bother. Her friends are predictable people. There's only a handful of places they hang out.

Getting into her car, she heads straight for Joe's. It's refreshing to walk inside the bar without a desperate need for alcohol.

"Wow, look at you!" Joe comments, raising his eyebrows as she steps up to the bar. She smiles at him, scanning her eyes down the stools for her friends. "You look great."

"Thanks, Joe. Izzie or Christina been by?"

He shakes his head. "Not today. George and Alex stopped by, but it was hours ago." He gestures at the array of glasses behind him. "The usual?"

"Not tonight, Joe."

"Oh. So this is purely social tonight?"

She grins. "Just looking for my friends. I guess I'll check some other places."

"See you, Meredith."

"Night, Joe."

She starts to turn and leave when something on the far end of the bar catches her eye. Addison's sitting there, the bar in front of her resembling Meredith's usual nights of empty shot glasses and anger.

Guilt hits Meredith, but at the same time, she's hoping to make an escape without being seen, particularly in her current dress. However, Addison stands suddenly and hands unsteadily to the door and Meredith, making a quick decision, follows her outside.

"Um, Addison?"

Addison turns and stares at Meredith, her eyes eerily unfocused. "Oh, it's you." She slurs loudly. "Nice dress." Even in her drunken state, Addison manages a characteristic smirk. "Been with my husband I guess."

Licking her lips nervously, Meredith asks, "Addison, do you have a ride?"

Ignoring the question, Addison continues to speak. "You got what you wanted didn't you? Dr. Grey? Didn't you? Maybe you want this, too!" Addison fumbles with her left hand and takes off her wedding ring, offering it to Meredith almost satirically.

"Addison." Meredith's heart is pounding with an unexplainable panic. "Addison, do you want me to call you a taxi or I could give you a ri-"

"No, no, no. Course not. I'll just drive myself."

"You can't-"

"Sure, sure. Derek did it. Worked for him."

"Derek almost died-"

"But he got what he wanted! Maybe if I nearly kill myself, Mark will change his mind…"

Meredith stares, thoroughly confused now. Hadn't she been talking about Derek before. "Mark?"

"Oh yeah." Addison nods emphatically and starts toward the parking lot. Meredith follows her, and watches as Addison surveys the cars, searching for hers. "Now where did I park the thing…"

"Here's my car, Addison, let's take it." Meredith's voice is coaxing.

Seemingly deaf to the statement, Addison points to the next row of cars. "Think it's over here. She changes directions and Meredith follows, glancing back at the bar, wondering if it would be safe to leave Addison and go get some help…

Addison continues talking. "I called Mark when Derek said he wanted a divorce, and told Mark I was coming home and do you know what he said? Hmm? He said I couldn't stay with him because of the way I left. And because I sent him home. And because he's being mean." She looks forward. "There's that car." Addison reaches in her pocket for her keys.

"Addison give me your keys." Meredith knows she's in over her head here; she has no idea what to do. "Come on, you shouldn't be driving."

"Derek did it." Addison repeats firmly.

"And he could have died."

"But he meant to."

Meredith stops, temporarily distracted by the comment. "He told you?"

Addison looks at her. "I guessed. He did, didn't he? He swerved into that hole. I can do that, too. It worked for him. He swerved didn't he? On purpose?"

"He let go of the wheel. That was stupid." Meredith moves closer, hoping that Addison is distracted now. "Come on let me drive you."

"No!" Addison's firm. She walks to her car and opens the drivers door and gets in, staring at Meredith defiantly. Meredith watches helplessly, head spinning uncertainly, as Addison pulls the car out of the parking lot then stops. Meredith tries to open the driver's door, but Addison just looks at her rather than unlock it.

Hesitating slightly, Meredith walks around the front of the car and opens the passenger door. Addison looks at her, her voice suddenly impatient, "Are you coming?" Her tone suggests that she's been waiting forever for Meredith to make the decision and is tired of it.

"I-" Meredith glances desperately around the parking lot, but it's empty of people. She has a sudden vision of Addison's car in a ditch on the side of the road. She imagines the way Derek looked after the car accident. At least if she goes, she can try to keep Addison from doing something stupid. "Yeah, I'm coming."

What choice does she have?

Addison pulls out of the parking lot and begins driving away from the bar and the hospital, taking roads that, thankfully, don't have hardly any traffic at night.

"Addison." Meredith is attempting a calm, rational voice. "Wouldn't it be better if I drove?"

Addison ignores her. She's speeding up as they go down the road and Meredith clenches her teeth in worry. I should be doing better… of all people I should know how to talk to someone who's drunk and depressed, right? Meredith thinks wryly.

"This is good, that you're here, too." Addison says suddenly after they've been driving awhile.

"Is it?" Meredith mutters distractedly. The way they're moving around in the lane is unsettling, and Addison's showing no sign of slowing down, either.

"I can do what Derek did. It got you back, maybe it'll get me Mark back. Or maybe Derek." She laughs, a loud, manic high pitched sound that's quite frightening. "Whoever it is." She pauses, squinting out of the window musingly. "Let's get some dark, huh?" With that statement, she flicks the headlights off.

"Shit, Addison…" Color quickly leaving her face, Meredith makes a grab to turn the headlights back on, but Addison swats her hand away as if Meredith is a child making a sneaky grab at the cookie jar.

She must have really been drinking because there isn't a hint of her regular personality in her behavior…

Meredith's eyes dart around the car for a cell phone; she's mentally cursing herself for leaving hers at home…

She spots Addison's pocketbook on her lap for the first time. "Addison.' She tries to keep her tone light and conversational, but its shaking slightly, which somewhat diminishes the effort. "Can I borrow your cell? I need to just tell my friends I came with you, I was supposed to meet them…" The lie sounds feeble even to her own ears. Who is she even planning to call? The police? Hospital? Derek? All the possibilities seem wrong somehow, but she desperately needs to connect outside of this car, beg for help, let someone else decide how to fix this…

"Who? Derek?" Now she's a seven year old, taunting.

"N-no, I just-Addison look out!" Meredith seizes the wheel and pulls them back in their lane; Addison had begun to drift off the side.

Addison's laughing again, that terrifying sound, and Meredith stares out at the inky darkness ahead of them, thinking to herself that everything had been too good to be true…how quickly things had turned around from bad to good, and now it had jumped right back to something like this…

"Derek let go of the wheel?" Addison asks suddenly, breaking the silence.

Meredith stares at her, and watches in horror as Addison lifts her hands off the wheel. Instinctively, Meredith grabs it and hold the car steady, at the same time flipping the headlights on.

"Hey, stop it!" Addison protests indignantly, shoving Meredith's hands away. "I'm going to do like Derek…" She lets go again, and Meredith grabs the wheel. "Fuck off!" Addison's voice is a command now.

Meredith closes her eyes momentarily, gripping the edge of the seat, knuckles white, terrified. "Addison lets just pull over and…and we can talk about this…", she says faintly.

"Oh, here we go…" Addison mutters.

Meredith's eyes fly open and her heart nearly stops. The headlights of another car have appeared on the other side of the two lane road they're driving on. "Addison, wait-"

Meredith starts to reach for the wheel but it's too late; Addison waits until the precise moment and swerves the car to the left, leaving them sideways in the middle of the road, with Meredith's side being the first thing the oncoming car slammed into.

Sorry, so short, but I needed the set that up. And yeah, I'm probably gonna get a little bit of crap for making Addison do that, it's out of character, yeah, but she was EXTREMELY drunk, and Addison's a little AU in this anyway. Besides, Derek did something similar. SO don't focus so much on whether she would do that or not. I want to know about the writing, especially Meredith's point of view about the whole thing. And also what you're thinking is coming ( I want to see how predictable I've made it) I love reviews, and I love all the ones I've gotten so far, and I especially love everyone reading this now even tho I put it off for way too long. Jigsaw's new chapter is almost completed as well, and should be posted soon.