The longer I stayed the more lenient Luke became until finally he let me wander around freely without any guards. There were enough monsters and other soldiers under his command that I was never really out of sight of someone, so it became unnecessary to have someone follow me all the time though whenever I heard Bob and Joe, I'd wave to them and they'd always ask me if I had doughnuts for them. Luke was often hidden away in council meetings or making preparations for the big war that he planned to wage, and he was smart enough to always keep me far away from these since he knew how good my hearing was. However whenever he had free time, he'd come and find me and we'd sit together or train together, giving me back Amaryllis only on these occasions. I worked hard and sapped up all the teaching Luke gave me like I did back at camp, feeling myself growing stronger and better every day. I even worked out with some of the other Half-Bloods. They were wary of me at first, but then they figured I was chill and not entirely against them and they also duelled with me, loaning me swords and spears to practice with when I didn't have Amaryllis.
Before I knew it I was training as part of Luke's army, his voice calling out orders as we trained under his command. It was excellent experience for me, learning how to fight different kinds of opponents and even a few monsters for practice, getting used to training my ears so that they drowned out the sounds of other fighters and their clashing swords in order to fight against just my own opponent. The harder I trained, the more the others seemed to like me and some of the other girls and older women who had joined Luke started inviting me to their cabins for slumber parties and to gossip. It was like camp but I was actually sociable. Insane. I reasoned with myself that even if I couldn't get any information on what Luke was planning next, I could at least learn his battle strategies. Annabeth would be pleased, proud even that I'd thought that far ahead. It was useful to know the enemy's methods, so I soaked up as much as I could and did my best not to forget things. When I wasn't training, eating, or sleeping, I was playing around on the cruise ship, which really was massive and had everything. I could even surf on one of the decks where they made water rush out in thick white gushes over a sloped ground whilst you stood on a surfboard and tried not to fall off. I was the only one with a talent for it and was yet to fall.
No one teased me for being blind like some of the kids back at camp had at first, they just rolled with it and pretty soon, I was happily calling them friends. It was weird, but true. In fact I would even go so far to say that I fit in better here than I had at camp. This only made me more confused in the head, but I think Luke was happy about it because whenever he talked, he sounded brighter. Whenever he was speaking with someone else I could tell that he was strained and angry, exhausted even, but his voice always softened whenever it was turned towards me. I started hanging out with him in his suite from time to time, and right now I was sat on the couch with a huge bowl the size of a bucket filled with ice cream. I couldn't help but ask. "Where the heck do you keep on getting all this stuff? Anything I ask for always magically appears."
"We have our ways and means." Luke told me cryptically, sprawled out next to me with one of his legs stretched over my lap as I continued eating. "Do you like it here, Lily?"
"You'd be insane to not like it, though it has been said I can be a little nuts from time to time." Joking easily, I licked my lips and made sure I didn't have chocolate fudge sauce around my mouth. "Also there's always clothes in my closet. Is it magic? I'm started to realise that I can think of something to wear and it'll appear."
"You didn't exactly pack for an extended vacation, and it'll be winter soon enough. A few more weeks and we'll be in September." Ah, so I must have been here a while already. I was starting to lose track of time in this place. Somehow I don't think I'll be going back to school this year, though it's not like it made much difference to me anyway. I fully planned to live on my ship and plunder treasure from the ocean floor and fight monsters for the rest of my life. Who needed a job? "Have you given anymore thought to joining us?"
"Aren't I pretty much one of you guys already?" I answered back but didn't clearly swear myself as one of his people. I was always careful, making sure to not get myself trapped on one side of the fight, because in truth I still wasn't sure which side I wanted to be on. "I'm guessing there's no chance you'll leave the world as it is and just kick the gods out of their thrones, right? I mean…the world isn't all that bad. We have some good things going on. Pizza, for example?" I felt Luke sit up and pull his legs back from where he'd been stretched out in relaxation, now focusing on me.
"We can't do that. If we're to enter a new age, it needs to be remade. It could be better than this one, Lily, we could make it so that nobody has to die needlessly, or be used as tools of the gods for their own gain and entertainment. Mortals can live their own lives, and we half-bloods wouldn't have to do the gods' dirty work any longer. We could make the world perfect." This was all well and good and sounded like a dream come too, but still I hesitated. "What? What's the matter?" Sensitive to my emotions, Luke seemed to recognise that I had a sinking feeling when I tried to imagine a perfect world.
"Nothing, it's just…I kind of like the world being imperfect." I admitted to him, setting aside my ice cream though I almost missed the table because I wasn't concentrating properly, having to quickly slide the bowl further forwards in order to let it settle. "Having something that looks perfect just makes it seem totally unrealistic, in my opinion. Too unreal. I like it when things are made or exist with their flaws and they manage to continue existing, sometimes being better for their imperfections. If everyone was perfect, there'd be no variety, it would be boring. In any case, I like knowing that things around me aren't perfect, because I'm not either. I'm flawed, but that's okay, I like that about the world. If the world gets remade the way you want, made to be perfect, then I don't think I'd have any place in it." My words descended upon Luke and although I had no idea if they had any effect on him, I did hear his tender murmur as his hand came to brush back my hair and touch my face, his thumb brushing against the scars around my eyes.
"You're not flawed, Lily." I could feel his light breaths against my face, warming my already flushed cheeks as I tried to focus elsewhere. He was just being sympathetic and kind, but still it made me feel a little fluttery and satisfied to know that Luke still cared enough about me to act this way. We'd gotten over trying to kill each other before, and although he never apologised for trying to kill Percy, I knew that the real him would never have done anything like that. Kronos had his claws dug deep, and if I could I was going to pull them out one by one. "You really don't know, do you?"
"Know what?"
"How special you are." Unable to help it, I snorted slightly.
"Special? Me? Sure. Because I'm the daughter of Poseidon, God of the Sea. I can talk to horses and ships, make the earth quake when I'm mad and eat twice my weight in ice cream." If ever I die and require a headstone, I'm having that stamped on it. "Come on Luke, I don't even acknowledge who I am. I haven't done anything notably worthwhile even after finding out I'm a demigod. What's so special about me?"
"You are special. You just don't realise it." Seeing that we were just going to go around in circles, I tilted my face away from his hand because if he kept it there any longer, I was pretty sure I would burst like a tomato that had been warmed up too quickly. I probably was as red as one too. I wanted to change the subject and fast, so I asked the first thing that popped into my head, because it had been weighing on my mind for a long time.
"Luke, you know about the Great Prophecy, don't you?" He stiffened beside me. "I wondered if you knew exactly what it was about, because…well I know it talks about a child of the Big Three making a decision that might destroy Olympus, and I just wondered…well…um, I wondered if…" I couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence because now I could hear the Sirens' song in my head, telling me that I was jealous and envious of those around me more powerful than I was, that deep down I wanted the power for myself so that people would admire and respect me. I couldn't help it. A small part of me wished the prophecy was about me, and not Percy. However Luke seemed to know what I was trying to ask as he relaxed again.
"You want to know if it's about you." Feeling embarrassed, I nodded my head. "You're right, the prophecy refers to a half-blood of the eldest gods, but it's believed not to be about you." He told me honestly and I slumped a little. "Lord Kronos believes it is because you deny your heritage, your godly side, therefore you do not technically class yourself as a true half-blood, and also because you have been cursed by Zeus, you are not entirely a whole half-blood."
"Prophecies can have that kind of loophole?" He hummed in confirmation, making me bite my lips slightly. "So…if I acknowledged Poseidon and accepted who I was, then the prophecy could be about me?"
"You have already reached sixteen and nothing has happened yet. Even if you were to accept your father, I doubt it would make any difference now. There is more to the prophecy, but I won't tell you about it. At least, not yet." I pondered for a few moments as I tried to determine whether or not I was disappointed. "Did you want it to be about you?"
"I just thought it might be nice to have enough power to have the lives of gods in my hand, maybe scare them a little." I waved off half-heartedly, still not sure how I felt about it. To be honest I felt rather pushed aside, like trash that no one wants that has been tossed away because it no longer serves any purpose. I felt damaged. Broken, even. I hated it. "I hate feeling powerless, probably more than anything. I think I'd like to not be so…useless." I wasn't expecting Luke to reach out and hold my hand, but was glad that he did. So far he hadn't pushed me too much to join his side, probably thinking that I was coming to that place on my own and he'd be right, but I just couldn't understand the fact that he'd sided with Kronos of all things. He was evil incarnate, and he wanted to release him back into the world. In my gut, I knew there wouldn't be any kind of civilisation to rebuild if he was set free and allowed to rule again. Monsters would just go wild, eating half-bloods and mortals alike until we were all gone. I didn't mention this to Luke, however. It didn't seem like the right time. It was rather creepy thinking that just over my head the coffin of Kronos lay, gathering back little pieces of himself little by little.
There was little I could do at present, and I doubted taking a sledgehammer to the thing would do any real damage other than get me thrown in the brig. I could feel his presence almost all the time, watching me, and it was creepy as hell. Sometimes I could hear his voice through Luke, using him to voice his desire and orders, and sometimes even tried to talk to me. I knew that Luke often had dreams plaguing him from Kronos, and it made me angry that he wouldn't even leave him alone, but I didn't know how to help him. Like I said, I was totally useless. I was, however, growing stronger, and the stronger I became the more interest Kronos took in me much to my horror and disgust. If I became powerful then I could be useful to him somehow, I could almost guess what he was thinking so I started to slack off a little in my training. I worked hard, but I didn't showcase the full extent of my skill. I reached a certain level then held it there in order to make it seem that I was average at best but capable, nothing too showy and not too disappointing so they at least didn't toss me overboard. The last thing I wanted was for Kronos to take an active interest in me but at this rate, I'm not sure how much longer I could fool him. Luke was starting to drop hints that maybe I should talk to Kronos myself, and see how much better the world would be if we could overthrow the gods together. The way he talked sometimes, I think he imagined us fighting side by side, and although I wasn't completely averse to that idea, I didn't want to fight against my brother.
Thinking about Percy reminded me of what I was truly holding onto, helped me keep from getting totally swept up in the motions of preparing for war and a brand new world we hoped to build. This was all for Percy, because even if I had to give up everything then I was going to protect him. I owed him that much at least, because when it comes down to it, I was the older sister, and it was my job to keep him safe no matter who the enemy was or what the world threw at us. I'd find a way, I swore it. This was the decision that I had already made.
