Chapter 5: De Ja Vu

THE OAK SITUATION

A frustrated Oak with a huge clump of ashes in his coat frowned angrily. Then, rolling his eyes, he dug into his wife's handbag and found her handphone.

He frowned and wondered with that calculative mind of his…"Hmm. If old people can't operate these stuff, maybe young ones are better at it…"

He then stomped out of the laboratory, leaving the other professors gossiping to each other and spotted an innocent four-year-old boy.

He did not mean to take out his anger on the boy, but anyway, he gave the boy an icy glare, thrust the handphone at him, and bellowed, "I'm in a very bad mood! Call Gary…OR ELSE!"

How very polite. The boy burst into tears. Oak tried to 'console' him by patting him on his back. However, he had not lost the strength he had when he was still a young man.

THUMP! THUMP! THUMP! He 'patted' the boy's back.

Patted, yeah right! Even we Golems know how to pat properly and not hurt the person being patted.

The boy screamed in pure terror as he vomited his breakfast. 'Pat' indeed.

The boy's grandmother came out of the house and glared at the 'big bully', hands on hips.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!"

MEANWHILE

Max dug even more frantically into his backpack, while Arcanine tried to bite his legs off.

"Waaa…Mommy!" Max sobbed miserably as Arcanine bit his bag and ripped it off Max. Max tried tugging the bag away from Arcanine as it gnawed on his bag.

Some of the salty tears dropped onto Arcanine and its flames seemed to get weaker. Max noticed this but could not cry 'unsincerely'. Therefore, one solution! Max undid his pants.

"SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS."

Max grunted. "Need more to finish this Arcanine off."

Arcanine, splattered with urine, was too scared to retaliate. It sprawled over Gary and started drying itself on his clothes.

"EEEEEEEEEK!" Gary got up and squealed. He…

1) was burnt

2) stank of urine

3) stank of sweat

4) stank of drool

5) feeling horrible because his hair was sticky and sticks to his face

6) wet because of urine

7) all of the above.

The answer is, of course, (7)

TEAM ROCKET

In disgust, Jessie pushed the stinky-because-of-cologne James away from her. The wimp fell backwards, straight into the cake.

SPLAT! Wobeffet and Meowth immediately started licking the cake off James. Victreebel took the easy way out and swallowed James up whole.

Inside Victreebel, James did some soul-searching. "Why doesn't Jessie like me? Am I too uncool? Hmm…I think I need to follow the characteristics of someone cool to be cool. What about…Ash? Nah…Jessie will kill me. Wes?" At first he nodded. However, he did not want to spoil the coolness and cuteness of Wes because of sheer clumsiness and gullibility.

"What about…James Bond? After all, we have the same name…"

BACK TO THE SITUATION

"Ugh!" Misty grunted as she dragged the heavy, rusty, dusty, dirty bike over in front of Ash. She then blindfolded Ash, changed into her bikini, and signalled to Pikachu.

"Ready, Pikachu?" asked Misty.

"Pika-Pika!" it agreed. It jumped onto Ash's head and undid his blindfold.

"Hey! What did you do that for!" asked Ash, a little irritated.

Misty pressed her finger to her lips. "Shh. We have a very special show just for you. I ask for only fifteen seconds."

"What kinda show is th –"

"Shh!"

"Pika – CHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" it exclaimed as it Thunder-ed the bike, reducing it to ashes.

"What the –? Are you making fun of my name?" asked the red-faced Ash angrily.

"No, no, we just…"

Ash glared at Misty. "Save it."

"Stop!" In desperation, Misty thrust the photograph of May, her rival in terms of Ash, in front of Ash's face, hoping to revive his memory.

"She's soooo cute! But…who is she?" asked Ash.

Heartbroken, Misty told him all about May.

Thanks for the reviews! I will try to keep updating.

P.S. Thanks, colosseum shipping fan for the useful review!