AN: As I said, sometimes I won't even be able to update once a week and for that I can only apologize. Getting used to uni life can be pretty stressful but it's getting better.
I wanted to clarify something. Last chapter I said that romance will not be a major factor of the story, and I stand by that. That doesn't mean that the relationship between Harry and Hermione won't be
meaningful, just don't expect much of the fluffy stuff!


CHAPTER 4: THE LIBRARY AND CLEARING THE AIR.

For the first time in his life, Harry woke up from a restful sleep, to meet absolute peace and quiet. There were no Dursleys to knock on his door in order to make him make them breakfast, there was no Ron snoring and there was no noise coming from someone stumbling around in the bathroom like at Hogwarts. He didn't even know what time it was but judging by the brightness coming from the window it was early morning hours. He decided to just stay in bed staring at the ceiling, thinking about nothing just revering the silence he found himself in.

Some time passed before eventually there was a knock on the door. He groaned as loud as he could so that whoever was on the door got the message and left. No such luck however, as Sirius looking undeterred entered anyway.

"You do know that when I used to do this, you weren't even in your parents' plans?" He asked smiling impishly. Seeing that Harry just groaned in defeat instead of giving a verbal answer, he continued.
"Now, get up you don't want to miss the lovelybreakfast Molly cooked huh? It's almost 11"

"For Merlin's sake don't you have a house elf to do the cooking for you? I really don't want to deal with her at the moment." Harry asked while getting up to go about his bathroom routine.

"Let's just say that Kreacher and I don't have the best of relationships… Yes leave it at that." Sirius replied his face showing the disgust he felt about said elf.

Harry stopped in his tracks at the tone of his godfather's voice. "You really do hate this place don't you?" Sirius for his part just sighed and said this was a talk for later.
"Enough of that, go get ready, after breakfast we go to the library, we have a lot of ground to cover eh?" He nodded to Harry as he left the room.


Meanwhile downstairs, people were still bubbling about. Molly was still serving food to Ron, Ginny and Hermione were talking quietly, the latter looking rather miserable with dark circled beneath her eyes, and Remus was drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. Tonks was missing as she was on the DMLE. Whatever they were doing, however, was immediately forgotten when Sirius and Harry entered the kitchen and sat down together at the head of the table. Both were whispering to each other and were seemingly ignoring the stares that were alternating between them and Molly. The latter went about as if nothing had happened the day before which eased up the tension somewhat.

"Here you go Harry, dear" She almost cooed, basically ignoring Sirius but serving him nonetheless. They were paying her no attention whatsoever so engrossed in their conversation that they were having, and being ignored wasn't something Molly Weasley was used to. She had to swallow her words though as she remembered the dressing down she received by Harry the day before. So when she went on to serve Ron, again, several shoulders sagged in relief as the "battle" was avoided.

Breakfast continued in similar fashion, each keeping to their own business, being quiet. Sirius and Harry both read today's newspaper which was hyping up the "Trial of the Boy Who Lived" which only managed to cut their appetite earlier, just as everyone else was already finishing up.

"We will be going to the library, so don't worry if you don't see us around" Sirius said, pointing to him and Harry and giving Molly a meaningful glance which she ignored. Remus nodded but couldn't offer any help, at least today, since Remus had Order business, Ginny and Ron simply nodded, as did the twins offering sympathetic glances to Harry.

"Can I come and help too?" Hermione asked hopefully. She deflated immediately at the cold calculating look Harry gave her but managed to maintain eye contact pleading her case as hard as she could.
"I mean only if you want me to". Before Harry or Sirius could answer however, Molly had to pipe up.

"Nonsense dear, you don't have any business with that kind of stuff, you should focus on cleaning up the hou-"

"Of course you can come Hermione" Harry said evenly, showing no favoritism but at the same time, no fondness in his voice. He had raised a hand to stop Molly's mothering but he was still looking at Hermione as if he was judging her. She, for her part, nodded thankfully and some life returned to her eyes at being accepted. She stood up to join Harry and Sirius, who was also looking at her calculatingly, but some red faced bi-witch wasn't done yet.

"Now see here, you don't get a say in what she has to do-"

"And who do you think you are to judge the exact same thing. You were just about to order her to clean up using no magic no-less. You are neither her mother nor mine, so stop being a hypocrite." Harry responded calmly but with a biting tone. He nodded to Hermione signaling to follow her and ignoring the seething Molly Weasley, when Ron piped up.

"What about us mate?"

Harry would almost laugh at the despair in his.. friend's?.. voice. He looked at him as if he had grown a second head when he addressed him.

"You mean to tell me that you are going to be of any use in the library, while studying law of all things? Plus I have no say in what you do since, well, she is your mother." He finished shrugging and leaving, finally, the kitchen along with Sirius and Hermione who was looking apologetically at the youngest Weasleys. The twins throughout this discussion were barely hiding their mirth at their mother's ire so they swiftly departed to their.. experiment room. Ginny was looking jealously at Hermione's retreating back but stayed otherwise silent and Ron had the decency to admit that he wouldn't dare be a distraction for anyone, no-less Harry, who was about to be on trial. Finally Molly really had to restrain herself from screeching worse than the accursed painting of Mrs Black. A certain Headmaster would hear of this kind of behavior. There was an Order meeting tomorrow after all…


Harry and Hermione followed Sirius, who was leading them to the library. No one was talking either because they were scared to do so, they were waiting for the scared one to talk, or because they just didn't want to get involved in these affairs. All of them though, had a single goal. Harry wouldn't be defenseless and he certainly wouldn't be taken advantage of. So once they reached the library, which was on the second floor, they immediately talked business and organized their expedition. Sirius showed the young ones how to dispel some curses before touching certain books, but in the end they managed to collect… less books than what they thought. Turns out Wizarding Law system hasn't really changed over the years, just the bias, and that the Black family had a lot of blackmail on some prominent Death Eaters-Citizens. Still, they would make use of anything they got and got to work. In fact Harry took note of some very interesting books about spells he could use in battle. And since these books belonged to the darkest of families, these spells would be very useful. But that was not what they were here for today.

Considering the subject, it also was very anticlimactic, the fact that there really wasn't anything too tricky or worth paying attention to. That the Wizengamot was split into three factions, The Dark, The Light and The Neutral they already knew. Other than that, it really was a game of putting smart and colourful words together and outsmarting your political opponent. The only thing Harry had to learn was how to conduct himself while on trial, how to address members of the Wizengamot and when and how he would to respond to provocative questions. The Wizarding World really was simplistic in its ideals, but very sinister should you do something considered inappropriate or annoy powerful people. So in the late afternoon hours, after discussing what they should do, they decided that Sirius would train Harry in pureblood customs and that they should immediately contact Ted Tonks. Sirius also mentioned something about Occlumency in order to keep your thought to yourself and not let your emotions show, but warned Harry that he wouldn't get very far in just 3 days. In the end though both Harry and Hermione took Sirius up on that offer, as it could prove very useful either way, and would discuss the schedule later that day.

All said and done, Sirius announced that he had to speak to Moody about something of importance, and he departed. Harry knew exactly what they would talk about but stayed silent, as did Hermione who although looking quizzically at the spot Sirius occupied before he left, stayed silent. She was also fidgeting in her seat clearly uncomfortable with the situation she found herself in and she was worrying her bottom lip, a clear sign that she had something to say. This went on for five to ten minutes, too long for Harry.

"You know you can speak freely, don't you?" He asked evenly

She actually jumped at being spoken to but got the message as she tried to straighten herself up and gather as much courage as she could.. In the end though, she choked on her own words.

"I'm sorry" she half choked half whispered "I-I really a-am" she only whispered this time, holding back tears, but maintaining eye contact with Harry.

He could feel the sincerity in her words and the pain this whole situation was causing her. Some other day he would just forget about it and move on but he wasn't as forgiving as that anymore. Still, just because this was Hermione he had to get to the bottom of this because, while he would never admit it to himself, he was hurting too just seeing her like that. After last year, a year they spent holding onto each other, their relationship had changed. Towards what though was unclear as of yet.

"What is it exactly you are sorry for?" He prompted, willing her to speak.

"What is there to not be sorry for Harry? I let myself go again. I made myself believe that the Headmaster knew what he was doing. I made myself forget about what someone like you would have to deal with alone and in a hostile environment. I made myself forget about last year and put all my faith to authority figures yet again. I abandoned my first and best friend when he needed me most" This time tears were leaking from her eyes as the whispered confession left her lips. "I know that what I did was unforgivable but-"

"Let me stop you right there and tell exactly why your actions hurt the worst." Harry cut in sharply causing her to pay attention to him instead of her feet. "Do you remember if you felt anything that was going on around you when you were petrified in Second Year?" She shook her head but the tear tracks on her cheek increased as she caught on to the point Harry was trying to make.

"Well let me enlighten you then. I used to come every single day when classes ended and sit by your bedside. I talked to you about my day and classes for hours trying to get you to respond. I copied my class notes for you, and read the chapters you missed thinking that this would do the trick. No. You were just unresponsive. Do you know how helpless I felt until the day I found the note clenched in your hand? Do you know how much I wished for you to just wake up? How many times Madam Pomfrey kicked me out? The relief I felt when you entered the Great Hall at the leaving feast? How it felt when you hug… You get it." He took a deep breath but he couldn't stop his voice from rising a bit.

"And now that I was unresponsive, in limbo state for several days with no moral or even physical support, you just did.. nothing? After how Ron behaved last year I didn't really expect much. But from you? I don't mean to sound selfish since I haven't been the most patient with you sometimes, but I thought I could count on you. I knew and I wanted to count on you I still believe I can. Hell, you could have just called for Merlin's sake since it can't be traced by magic! And for you to just justify your actions by saying that Dumbledore knew better felt like I was stabbed in the back." He was actually leaning across the table his face inches away from hers. She was silently crying but she kept looking at him. She knew she deserved no better. "You know that the Wizarding World regards mental health as inconsequential. Just imagine how Sirius would be if he didn't have anyone to talk to all day. And he was 12 years in Azkaban, so he is considered lucky!"

He stood up and moved in front of her still maintaining eye contact.
"So yes you should be sorry, you should be crying but you know what else you should do?" He asked softer this time. She just shook her head her tears still falling.

"Last year you showed me the part of you that believes in what you stand for. That believes in you. That doesn't let anyone dictate your life or make decisions for you. Ever since First Year you would do anything a teacher asked, or me and Ron for that matter, but this wasn't the real you. You know what is right. You know- knew what should be done. Don't just think on it- act on it. Trust yourself, don't be so gullible. Dumbledore isn't going to lead your life nor is anyone else you look up to. I actually agree with the old man on one thing. Do what is right not what is easy." He gave her a small nod and was about to leave her in her own thoughts but she had just one more thing to do.

Hermione knew she had no right to do this but didn't know how else to thank Harry for, basically, calling her out on her worst flaws and her worst mistake. She jumped out of her chair and hugged Harry harder than ever before while sobbing on his shoulder. "I'm sorry" she kept repeating between hiccups and sobs, almost incoherently.

Harry just stood and hugged her back. He knew he shouldn't have been so compassionate so quickly, but maybe this is just what his friend needed. Things wouldn't be back to normal after this conversation, he still felt the pain of all the weeks he spent alone. But at least there would be some improvements. So they stayed like this until Hermione could calm herself down enough. Eventually she disentangled herself from his arms, wiping her eyes and giving him a small thankful smile. He just nodded and suggested they go down for dinner. While walking down he missed the hopeful glances she threw at him or the determination in her eyes, promising herself to be better.


Dinner was just the same as breakfast. The only difference was that Moody and Tonks joined them, and that Hermione, after Harry didn't protest, sat next to him. What Harry absolutely hated and wanted it addressed immediately, were the eyes that he felt were always on him, and they belonged to a certain young red headed girl. Finally as people started leaving Harry saw Sirius nod at him, signaling that he should stay in the kitchen. Eventually Harry, Sirius and Moody were the only occupants in the room.

"Right, let's get straight to the point. Your training starts the day after your trial. Tuesday 7 in the morning. We will be training your mind, body and magic and I am an honest man, Crouch was a really good actor bur I can assure you that the real thing is much worse." Moody said giving Harry a look that would have sent many trainees running to their mother. Harry of course was undeterred.

Sirius cleared his throat grabbing their attention. "Your Occlumency training will be included in these sessions so if Hermione is still interested you will have to let her know. It is up to you whether you tell her or anyone else about your normal sessions though. Occlumency training will start after your normal sessions. Any questions?"

"I guess that since you were talking, that Kingsley and Tonks will also be helping?" he asked Moody.

"Aye and they are the best you are gonna get, so I want you to be the best we are going to get." Moody said standing up. Before he left the room he paused and spoke again. "I don't often say this but I believe in you lad. Show everyone why they shouldn't suppress or underestimate you." Coming from the infamous Alastor Moody, could only fuel Harry's drive. He nodded and watched as the "retired" Mater Auror left.

Eventually Sirius broke the silence that remained after Moody's departure. "I know there is a lot going on right now but tomorrow we need to have a serious talk, there are some" he hesitated a little here, "things you need to know that you should have known long ago. But I am getting ahead of myself" He continued smiling as he got up. "For now I want you to think about all the things you and Miss Granger could be doing in the near or even distant future." After that he swiftly departed having eased up the tension that he had built up.

Harry was too tired to chase his godfather but he did curse him under his breath. He didn't know where he stood with Hemione, that much was clear, but you could never say never. Right now he was more intrigued by what else could Sirius possibly have to say that could shock him. He had a niggling feeling that he was about to get some much wanted answers and that a certain Headmaster had a lot more to answer for.


AN: I originally wanted this chapter to be almost triple the size but this seems like a good place to end it. It is almost like a filler chapter if you like. What I can reveal though is that there will be 3 more chapters until Harry returns to Hogwarts. So the pacing will increase as time goes by. Thank you for all the reviews and advice they really do help!