Turning the Tables

Looking across the room, it doesn't take long to spot the three of you. As always, my eyes are drawn to Bella; her head thrown back in amusement at whatever lame joke Emmett is telling. She's smiling widely, and seeing her so happy brings a smile to my face.

You look equally content as you study her. You're trying to be subtle but failing miserably. I can't blame you. She's glowing. She's the best thing that ever happened to me. She's too good for me, and she's certainly too good for you.

I remember the day you introduced us all to your best friend in junior year of college. The guys thought Bella was cool and welcomed her with open arms. Me, I loved her from the first hello; the first shy smile that lit up her face, and the nervous lip biting she still does. Even now…

During our college years, we were around each other a lot. Outside of classes, the band ate up all our free time. You were the exuberant showman … the charismatic frontman. Emmett, Jasper, and I were happy to be in the background, the silent members of the group. A group Bella was very much part of.

I wanted her then, but instead, I had to settle for watching her from afar. She was there at every gig, no matter how big or small. She came to every shitty rundown bar selling the merchandise, T-shirts, CDs, whatever we were promoting to get the band off the ground. It was inevitable she took control of the band's social media when we started to gain popularity. I think the first scout who came to see one of our shows was because of her.

Bella Swan is breaking dawn's unofficial fifth and most important member- in my eyes, at least. But I guess I am biased.

She's been with us from the start, believing in us back when no one else did. When we were just a bunch of kids messing around with our sound and, in some cases, more than just music.

You're not the boy from Forks anymore.

At the start, you had your habit under control. You fooled everyone with how together you were when we were signed to our label, the album deal, and the tours that followed.

However, it wasn't long before the lure of fame got to you.

They call it the dark side of fame with good reason. You pushed every limit … enjoyed every indulgence fame had to offer. Damn the consequences.

Bella and I were left to pick up the pieces. We took care of you when you were at your lowest - when the drugs took hold, and you spiraled.

Even when everyone else had given up on you, we stuck by your side. I did it for her. She did it because you're her best friend - her rock. I hated what the drugs did, not just you but Bella too. I'd see the pain in her eyes when you went out on another bender and got into trouble. I hated seeing her heartbroken time and time again when your actions hurt her.

From the drink that turned you into an arrogant, sometimes abusive drunk, and the drugs that made you unrecognizable from the boy she grew up with. There were the girls too- a different one every night. Sometimes more than one.

You broke her heart repeatedly, but you were too out of control to see what your actions were putting her through.

I did.

I saw everything.

In the morning, when you'd sober up, you'd remember some of what you had done. More often, you wouldn't. Every time you came back, begging for forgiveness, promising you'd change … get sober … swear this time was the last, but it was never long before your addictions took hold.

I suppose I should thank you because who knows if it weren't for the late-night calls and missions to bail you out, we'd never have gotten close … never have our own friendliness turn into, well, everything.

It wasn't instant. Not by a long shot.

It took a lot of Dutch courage, or in my case, tequila before I was finally ready to admit how I felt. Bella told me she felt the same, that she had been watching me too but kept quiet because she thought I wasn't interested, or like you, only saw her as a friend.

No chance. I told her, and later, I showed her just how wrong she was … how strong my feelings were.

That was five years ago….

We've been together ever since.

I think you know how badly you messed up.

Sometimes I catch you looking at her when you think nobody is looking. I see the longing in your eyes when I reach out to pull Bella against me. See you grimace when she reaches for me like she used to reach for you when you were merely friends. I definitely see the jealousy in your eyes when she blushes a delicious shade of pink from the words I whisper in her ear that are meant just for her.

Now you're clean and sober, the tables have turned - you're the one watching. You see what you missed, and you want her as more than your best friend. But she's my girl now, and I intend to keep it that way.

When I can't stand the distance any longer, I go over to where it's just the three of you talking. Your eyes are focused solely on her, and rightly so. She's fucking glowing. Radiant …. Beautiful.

You're so distracted, and you don't see me approaching. At least not until my arms wrap around Bella's waist from behind. My palms creep under the latest band T-shirt she acquired. Another one of mine she's stolen over the years. Bella thinks it's funny. I think it's sexy as hell seeing her in my clothes.

"Miss me?" I whisper as I lean down to place a kiss behind her ear; a spot I know drives her wild.

"Always," Bella sighs. Turning in my arms, she reaches up, her arms wrap around my shoulders, and she kisses me long and hard, completely oblivious to your narrowed eyes or my brother's mock protests.

Then I'm the one groaning as she presses her body against me.

"Guess I should go." Your voice cuts in, and I pull away from Bella to see that slightly sad smile on your face.

"See you later, Jacob," I reply before my eyes cut to Bella.

"Bye Edward … Bella." I vaguely hear you reply, but I'm too distracted by my girl.

You don't begrudge us our happiness. You just wish it were you. You realized too late what you let go of.

You don't need me to tell you what you lost.