Let Him Down Easy

Buffy got up out of her bed and looked around at everything to make sure she really was back. She looked at the picture that was on a stand by her bed, it was of her and Dawn. She was back. Then she ran into Dawn's room and saw that her bed was empty, but there, and there were empty sleeping bags all over her floor as well. She checked the other rooms also. They were all just as she had remembered them the night before except the rooms were all empty. At this point she knew that she was back to her time but she wondered why no one was there so then she ran downstairs.

She walked into the living room and saw no one. Next she went to the kitchen but again…there was no one there. Now she was beginning to get worried. She went to the front door to look at the paper and check the date just to be absolutely positive she was where she was supposed to be in time. She opened the door and picked up the paper, "Friday, April 25, 2003," she read aloud. She was exactly where she was supposed to be. So, where was everyone?

She closed the door. She was so confused. Usually she was the last one to sleep and the first one to wake up these days. She would wake up and then get the potential's up. Then they would all eat breakfast and start training. So, where was everyone and why hadn't they woke her up?

She walked back into the kitchen only this time she could hear noises coming from outside. She walked out the back door still in her pajamas with a confused look on her face. When she walked outside she saw half of the girls all in a line training with Faith at the leading position. She was teaching them new moves. The other half of the girls were with Robin on the other half of the lawn doing weapon's training. Willow and Xander were sitting on the porch observing when they saw Buffy come out.

"Well if it isn't little miss sleepy head," Xander said as he stood up to greet Buffy.

Buffy, still looking slightly confused, asked, "What's going on here?"

Willow got up with a bright smile on her face. "We decided to let you sleep. You usually wake up before everyone and when you didn't this time we figured that you were just overtired and needed the rest so we gave it to you."

Xander and Willow smiled at her so proud of themselves for being such good friends. "We know…we know…you don't have to say it…we're the best," Xander said as he looked at Willow.

Buffy smiled at them graciously. "Thank you," she said with gratitude evident in her voice. She just smiled brightly. She was happy to be home. She had been through quite a lot during her little trip but she had a lot of work to do. Buffy was so busy being so happy to be home that she forgot to make sure that things had gone exactly back to the way she left them. She had to make sure that Willow didn't quit magic and that Angel didn't end up staying.

Her face turned from happy to worry as she asked Willow, "So…Will…are you going to be doing any spells today or anything? You know…to help with the training and all."

Willow looked at her with confusion. "Umm…," she said as she thought very hard to figure out exactly what Buffy was trying to ask. Then her face turned from confused to worried. "Was I supposed to? Did I miss something?"

Buffy just smiled. She knew that if Willow reacted like that everything was ok. "No…its ok…never mind," Buffy said reassuringly.

Xander was also confused now. "Umm…what was that about Buff? Kind of an odd question to ask."

Buffy was about to tell them what had happened but she decided against it. She thought it would probably be better if they just didn't know. "Nothing…don't worry about it." They still looked at her with confusion so she decided to change the subject, "Where's Dawn and the others?" she asked looking around.

"Dawn and Andrew went to get some supplies…like…food," Willow said all of the sudden looking very hungry.

"And Anya and Giles went to try and figure out more about the First from Anya's sources," Xander added to fully answer Buffy's question.

"Cool. Sounds like you guys have this all under control. What do you all need me for?" Buffy asked sarcastically.

"Well personally I always vote we keep you around for the company. It would just be weird without you," Xander joked.

The three friends smiled at each other and then Buffy asked, "Spike in the basement I'm guessing?"

Willow rolled her eyes. "Yeah…he's being mister loner, 'doesn't talk to anyone or come upstairs at all' guy."

Buffy laughed a little. "I figured. I'm gonna go see what he's doing. Later guys." She walked back into the house.

She opened the door to the basement and walked about half way down the stairs and stopped. She saw Spike working out with his punching bag. He had his shirt off and sweat was dripping down the side of his face. As soon as Buffy saw him she realized something that she didn't realize before her little adventure.

Before she had been sent back in time she was starting to feel like she might have feelings for Spike. She respected him and he was becoming a good man…but…she knew now for sure what her feeling towards Spike where. She did have feeling for him, but not the kind of feeling that he had for her. She loved him, but as a friend.

She knew that she could never love him as anything more then that partly because of they're history and because she saw him as a good friend and the other part was because she knew she could never love anyone but 'him.' She knew that Angel was the only man, or vampire, she could ever love and nothing was going to change that, not even the fact that they couldn't be together.

But, he did look pretty damn hot down there covered in sweat with his shirt off. Yes, the sexual attraction was still there but more in a friend's with benefit's kind of way. But even that couldn't be. It wouldn't be fair to him.

She walked down the rest of the stairs towards the obviously frustrated vampire. When he saw her coming he threw one last punch sending the bag flying off its chain and then stopped and looked at her. He had longing in his eyes and Buffy knew this was going to be harder then she thought. She walked over and sat on his cot.

"Hey there…what did it do to you?" Buffy asked as she shrugged her head in the direction of the fallen punching bag.

Spike looked at the bag and then back at Buffy. "Looked at me wrong," he joked.

Oh boy, Buffy thought, he was making jokes. He usually doesn't make jokes unless he's uncomfortable. "I see," Buffy said trying to show a smile.

She was right. Spike was uncomfortable because he could sense that something was up with Buffy. He didn't know what it was but he could tell that it wasn't something good. He sat down on the bed next to her. "So…what's the news?" he asked hoping she would just get strait to the point.

Buffy smiled and looked down at the ground. She knew she had to just get right to the point but she paused for a second. She didn't even know why she was about to bother telling Spike how she feels. She had told him plenty of times before that he had no chance with her but yet she felt like she needed to tell him how she felt once more. She took a deep breath and started to explain. "Spike…I've kind of been thinking about a lot of things lately…and…there's just something that I need to clear up here."

Normally this would be the time Spike would start getting excited. The things Buffy were saying would normally make him think that maybe she was going to tell him that she finally felt the same way about him as he felt for her. But he could sense in her voice and the way she was acting that this was not going to be the case. He sighed, "Right then…shoot."

Buffy looked at him and continued. "Spike I just wanted you to know, and I mean honestly truly know how much you mean to me. I never even really realized how much you meant to me until I really thought about it. Anyway what I'm trying to say is that…well that I feel safe with you."

That was the kiss of death and Spike knew it. Now it was his turn to look to the ground. He knew what was coming. Buffy continued, "I mean…like I feel close to you. I feel like I can tell you anything. When we're in fights together I trust you to have my back. I don't even really know exactly how to explain this and I think I'm doing a really bad job trying," she said as she laughed a nervous laugh.

Spike lifted his head up and tried to muster up a smile. When he finally got it he said softly and understandingly, "Its ok Buffy. I think I know what you're trying to say."

Buffy looked at him with a little bit of shock in her eyes. She didn't expect him to take this as well as he was. He really had changed. "You do?" she asked with a half smile.

Spike smiled back at her, this time with a real smile. "Yeah love…I really do, it's ok," he said actually sounding like he meant it.

Buffy's smile grew. "You truly are an amazing friend Spike." Then she paused for a second and then continued where she left off, "And you're an amazing man."

With these words Spike looked at her in shock. Ever since he had become a demon of the darkness he had never been called a man let alone an amazing man. Buffy saying what she had said meant more to him then she could ever imagine.

The two friends just sat there and smiled at each other just enjoying the comfortable silence.