Chapter 12
February 25, 2000
It's been a grueling day. I convinced Don to talk with the family about how close he had come to suicide. He didn't want to at first. He argued that it would just upset anyone, but I told him that it was too late. They already knew that something was terribly wrong.
It was really hard for him because he didn't know what to say. He told them that he had reached the point where he just couldn't deal with pain anymore… his and mine. He thought that killing himself would end the pain for all of us. Then he realized that he just couldn't do that to us. Everyone told him the same thing that I did, that if he committed suicide, they would be in pain forever. He asked for their patience and understanding in dealing with him, because he knew that the struggle to live with the relentless pain would be with him for a long time.
Penny was affected the most, well Penny and Dr. Smith. Will just couldn't understand why anyone would even think of doing anything like that and was just glad that he decided not to. Penny still carries a lot of guilt. I asked her what would help her lose it, and she said that she won't until he can walk again. Don was so good with her. After she said that, he took her hands in his and asked her to look him in the eyes. He told her that he has accepted the fact that he will probably never walk again, and that he really could live with that. He asked her to help him by sharing Carmella with him when he looked like he needed a lift. She immediately gave him her pet, and they shared a genuine smile.
Dr. Smith was another matter. As far as I'm concerned he should feel guilty because of what he did to Don's back. Don forgave him though, and I guess I should too. When Don asked him about losing his guilt, he said that he wouldn't until there were little Wests running around the ship. Don looked at me for help with that one. I don't know if they believed me or not, but at this point, I don't care, because it really is how I feel. I told them that, if I had to choose between having a baby or keeping Don, it would be a no-brainer. I would sacrifice having children if it meant that I would live my life out with Don at my side. Don took my hand and told Dr. Smith that they had better listen to me, because of the three of us I was the only one who really had any sense. It's about time that they realized that!
Tomorrow is my birthday. Mom and Dad asked me what I want. I didn't know what to say. All I need is to have is Don within reach, so I can be sure he is still with me. Maybe we'll go swimming, but I really don't care what we do. I just want him near.
There was a subdued aura around the encampment because, not only was it Judy's twenty-second birthday, but the anniversary of Don's paralysis. Judy and Don had decided to go to the swimming hole for the day, and expected to come home to a family dinner.
The weather was still on the cool side, but the water was warm enough for swimming. This time it was Don who suggested the skinny-dipping. Enough of his strength had returned that he was able to keep up with Judy. They were floating leisurely on their backs when Don decided to offer Judy a gift if she wanted it.
"Judy, remember the last time we were floating here?"
"Yes?"
"I'm ready for a replay, if you want it."
She stood and looked down at his floating form. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah, if it's still what you want."
She leaned down and kissed him tenderly. "It's what I want."
He cleared his mind and envisioned Judy's movements. She slowly worked her way down his body. Although he couldn't feel her lips or her tongue, he could sense her love and devotion as he allowed her to break his final taboo. The experience was intense and better than any physical release would have been. Although he hadn't climbed out of his depression, he felt that he had taken several steps out of the hole, and could at least now see the light at the top.
The leisurely day passed too quickly and it was with some reluctance that Judy climbed behind Don on the hover bike to return to camp. She circled her arms around him and lay her head against his back. As he caressed her arms she murmured, "Take the long way back?"
He nodded and tore away from the lake, allowing the freedom of flight to fill his senses. He took her on a tour of the area, but she saw nothing, as she only needed to feel his body against hers. They finally pulled into camp and found the table set and dinner waiting for their return.
Maureen greeted them, and noticed a subtle change in their demeanor. A sense of peace emanated from Judy. Don still had the crease between his eyes, but the tense lines that usually surrounded his mouth were gone, at least for the time being. She hoped that what John had planned didn't make them return.
"You both seem… better."
"It was what we needed, Mom," Judy replied as Don drove the bike back to the Chariot's parking bay. "I don't know how long it will last, and I know he can regress at any time, but I'll take whatever I can get."
'Hungry?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact."
She locked her arm around her daughter's. "Then let's get everyone together. I managed to cook a meal that will be worthy of Dr. Smith's most profuse compliments."
As predicted, Dr. Smith was free with the compliments when dinner was completed. "Madam, please remember this meal for my celebration in November. It was simply exquisite. The vegetables were cooked to perfection and…"
Maureen smiled and decided to save the rest of the family from his monologue. "Thank you, Dr. Smith. I'll run in and get dessert."
She quickly returned with a jam filled roulade that held a single burning candle. Judy reached out for Don's hand and held it until the family finished their singing and she fervently made her wish and blew out the candle.
As they sipped their tea and ate the treat, John tapped his cup for attention. He cleared his throat. "Judy," he gazed at her in affection, "you have grown into a beautiful, loving, young woman, and I want you to know how proud of you I am. The past year has shown you some of the worst experiences you will ever have in your life, and you have weathered them with determination and strength."
Don squeezed her hand as she replied, "Thank you, Dad."
"I'd also like to add that I couldn't have chosen a better man for you than you chose for yourself."
Don chuckled at this line. He couldn't help adding, "Uh, John. I think you did choose me when you decided that I would be your pilot."
John retorted, "You don't know how many times Judy pestered me to choose you!"
Their laughter was refreshing and lightened the heavy air that had surrounded them for the past few weeks.
John continued with the meeting. "I have a proposal to make. I would like to take a vote on returning to Marvenius as soon as we can prepare to lift off."
Although this was not a surprising announcement to the adults, it was still met with contemplative silence.
"I will now open the floor for debate."
Dr. Smith was the first to venture an opinion. "Professor Robinson… that would be quite a dangerous act as I am sure that we are still on the list of exterminations and will be killed on sight should be return there."
Don chimed in, "Not to mention what would happen to Judy, Maureen and Penny…"
John countered, "That would be true if we were to announce our landing. This time, we would sneak in and establish a camp far away from the metropolis."
"And then what?" don argued. "Occupy their medical facility and demand that they cure me? They probably don't even have the medical expertise to help because they just exterminate people like me."
Maureen interjected at this time. "We have something to offer them now. They might be interested in acquiring the enzyme as a possible cure for their women's disease."
Don was still not convinced. "Once we give them that, we're expendable. I still agree with Zach. It's too dangerous."
John had yet to give the full picture of his plan and continued. "I plan on linking up with the rebellion forces and working through them."
Don wouldn't back down. "That's a lot of assumptions. The rebellion may already have been squelched. Even if they haven't been, what makes you think they would welcome us? They might just see us as a burden they aren't ready to take on."
Now Penny spoke up with her opinion. "They'll take us in, Don. After all, we were their inspiration."
Don gave one more shot at convincing them. "And how are we going to find the rebellion forces without getting caught?"
John grinned widely, hoping Don would be the one to bring up that argument. "Well, Major
West, that's where you come in. With your military training, you'd be in the best position to figure that part out."
"How did I know you were going to say that?"
"Now, unless there are any objections, I'd like to hold a vote. All those in favor?"
A chorus of "Ayes" was heard.
"Those opposed?"
One lone "Nay" was counted.
"The 'ayes' have it. Major, how long until the ship can be ready for lift off?"
"I want it placed on the record that I am totally against this."
"Duly noted. How long?"
"Two days, three days max."
"All right then, we start first thing in the morning."
As the family gathered for breakfast, Maureen gauged each person's demeanor. Penny, Will and John were their usual selves. Dr. Smith was as cantankerous as ever, but Judy and Don worried her. She noted that the crease was deeper and the lines around Don's mouth had returned, and he looked like he hadn't slept. Judy looked no better.
"Good morning!" Maureen offered, "I'll get you both some coffee."
"Morning, Mom," Judy responded. "We spent almost all night talking. I don't think I can function without it today."
John placed his cup on the table in front of him. He had a pretty good idea what had kept them up last night, but he feigned innocence. "Talking about what?"
Don's quick reply alerted the group to his foul mood. "Guess."
"Don, the decision's been made."
"Well, I'd like to open another family meeting."
"All right, I can call the family together again, but why?"
"I think we should postpone the trip."
"And your reasons are?"
"To give me more time to figure out what's going on. I think we can do that without their medical knowledge."
Maureen interjected, "Don, I'm at a stand still with the enzyme research. I need better facilities and help from medically trained professionals."
"So we hand the enzyme over to them, and then what? We can't force them to cooperate with us."
John interrupted, "Don, we're not just going to hand the enzyme over to them… But this isn't about the enzyme is it?"
"No, it's about going back to a planet that's dangerous… for all of us."
"What would your vote be if I was the one in that chair?"
"Of course I'd go," he paused before continuing in a softer voice, "but I wouldn't vote to bring all of you with me."
This comment brought the discussion to a standstill as they each considered that possibility.
John had to agree with him. "Actually, Don that was my first thought. It was Maureen who argued against that option."
Don raised his eyebrows at her.
Maureen sighed and ventured forth an explanation. "Don, I can't really explain it, but I have a good feeling about this mission. My intuition tells me that we all need to go. This trip will lead to much more than we expect it to."
Don was beaten yet again. He rubbed his eyes. "I still don't like it."
Judy linked her arm through his, placed her chin on his shoulder and added, "You don't have to like it. Can you finally accept it?"
"Do I have a choice?"
Maureen, John and Judy responded as a chorus, "No."
The pre-flight check had been completed and the family was strapped in and ready for take-off. John needed one final reassurance that Don was fit to fly.
"You're sure you can pilot?"
"In my sleep."
"And we can't save that prop for the landing strut?"
"Nope. Too dangerous on take-offs." He glanced at John and gave a tight smile. "Don't worry. I took the dimensions and assigned Will the task of making another one. He's already half-way done."
"Well, Major, then we are good to go."
Don sighed, "Yeah, back to Marvenius and God knows what."
"It helps to believe that God knows what he's doing, Don."
He wanted to admit that his confidence in God had been wavering lately, but now was not the time for a theological discussion. The Jupiter lifted-off and smoothly entered space. There was no turning back. It was onto Marvenius and the destiny that awaited them there.
On to the sequel, "Celebrations Found"
