Chapter 19: Of Rooftops & Pep Talks

Caroline found Derek on the roof. Of course the Alpha wouldn't wander far from the remaining members of his pack.

"Is this the part where I tell you not to jump?" Caroline swung her legs over the side as she sat next to his standing form. "'Cause, I'm gonna be honest. I don't know much about whatever species of werewolf you are, but I'm doubting it's a kind that can survive that fall."

"Saw Scott leave with Stefan," he replied after a pause.

"They're going to try to track the Alpha's scent from where Erica was taken."

"I should go too, then."

" No ," Caroline grabbed his leg before he could move. "What you should do is talk to me."

"Scott -"

"Is perfectly safe with Stefan and Damon for backup. They're not going to just storm the castle, if they even find it. And you are way too upset to think straight if it came to a fight anyway."

"I'm fine." Derek turned away from her.

"There's a broken table downstairs that would disagree with you. And you're needed here. Your pack needs you."

"Half my pack is missing," Derek ground out. "Isaac is scared. And Jackson? Jackson is -"

"Just as scared," Caroline shook her head. "And you know that. He needs you. They both do. They need their Alpha. For guidance. For strength. Not for throwing tables and storming out."

"It's not like all that arguing was helping Erica or Boyd!" Derek paced away along the edge.

"Maybe not. But no one ever said shoving a bunch of werewolves and vampires together in close quarters was going to be easy. But you're an Alpha and you need to start acting like one. Your pack comes before everything else. Before your anger. Your guilt. Before - everyone," she paused, glancing away only for a moment. "I'm not saying that you can't feel those things. It's actually a good thing. And you shouldn't just bottle it all up until you have to run away to a rooftop. Your pack needs you, but you also need them. Let them see the walls come down every once in a while. Don't let your emotions come between you and them. You can show them strength, by showing them your fear, and then not letting it stop you. Let them know you're angry, and show them how you control it, so they know how to control it too. Don't hide from them. Help them."

Derek finally shifted his precarious stance, staring at the vampire for a long moment before dropping his gaze to the parking lot below.

"I was never supposed to be an Alpha."

Caroline wouldn't have heard it without her supernatural senses.

"What?"

"I wasn't meant to be an Alpha. My mother - she was our Alpha. And she was amazing. Respected. Feared. These Alphas would've never dared challenge her. My sister - Laura - she was the one who was trained our whole childhood to become the next Alpha. We never expected it to happen - like that - so, soon. But she was ready. She only really had me, but she just, she was a natural leader. A natural Alpha."

"Scott said that you became the Alpha to save him - from the Alpha pack - from what's happening to you now. That sounds like something a real Alpha would do."

Derek frowned and moved away again.

"Scott shouldn't have talked to you about that."

"Well, at least someone around here is halfway decent at talking and sharing their feelings. What? Afraid to seem like a decent guy? Because doing that for Scott was decent, and good, and something an Alpha would do."

"That doesn't matter. Scott's not part of my pack."

"Oh, please. Scott's more a part of your pack than either of you want to admit."

"He's only helping because that's what he does." Derek waved a hand. "It's who he is ."

"And being the guy that took the Alpha bullet for him? That's who you are. You knew he'd hate you for it, didn't you? From the sound of it, you never were even going to tell him. Just let him think that you betrayed him to keep him safe. You want to know why Scott is scared to become part of your pack?"

"He's not scared to -"

"Oh yes he is. Sure, the two of you have all sorts of issues to work through. But that's not it. Not all of it, at least. And I think you know it. You guys caught us up to speed on your side of things, let me let you in on a little of my history. I was like Scott. I didn't choose to be what I am. Someone - a vampire - killed me. Turned me so I could be their little spy on my own friends. So I could be some sacrifice in a ritual. Threatened my mother. Short version - she wasn't a good person. But, I'm getting ahead of myself. When I first turned, I didn't understand what was happening to me and I couldn't control it. I killed someone. Some innocent guy. Dead. Because of me . I almost lost it. I wouldn't have been able to get through it all without my friends. And my mom. My mom, who when she first found out what I was, wanted to kill me. Gosh, I hated being a vampire so much at first, and I didn't even know how bad it was going to get. But you wanna know something funny? I found myself as a vampire. A better, more confident, stronger, happier, version of me I've ever known. But it took time."

Caroline glanced up at the werewolf and then down at the lot.

"Scott didn't have a choice, just like me." She sighed. "And just like me, it's going to take time for him to accept it. I think, for him, becoming part of your pack, any pack, just brings him one step closer into a world he never wanted any part of. Everything up until now, hasn't been his choice. Not really. Just reacting. Survival. Joining a pack, letting that part of his wolf have that hold, that would be a choice. A conscious, willing, step into that world. He's just not ready - yet. Give him time to be ready. And give yourself time to become the Alpha that you can become. For the wolves that I know, becoming an Alpha of a pack is something you earn . You don't just get to be it because of a bloodline or killing someone. You're the Alpha of the pack because the pack submits to you. Because the pack respects you. The Alpha gets his power from his pack, just as much as the Alpha gives his pack power."

When Derek finally found the courage to face the vampire again, their eyes locked and it was like the rest of the conversation, and ten more, played out between that shared gaze.

"How do you know so much about our kind? You all said that vampires and werewolves are natural enemies."

"It's like one of those old rich family feuds where most of the vampires and werewolves fighting each other today don't even actually know where the hate all started."

"And you do?"

"Let's just say we met the original family feud contestants."

"There's something else," Derek's brow narrowed.

Caroline pulled herself up from the ledge and paced away from the wolf and then back.

"My boyfriend," she crossed her arms. "Or, well, I'm not exactly sure what he is anymore. He's a werewolf. A hybrid, actually. Vampire and werewolf. But he was a werewolf first. And don't ask me how any of that is possible because it's a long story that will only make your head hurt and will probably make me start crying, and I promised myself after the three weeks of no returned phone calls from him that I wouldn't do that anymore." She paused and took a breath. "He's also an Alpha. It doesn't give him any special powers or different colored eyes -"

"He's the wolf you said you called to help."

"Called, but never got a call back , yes. He's off helping other packs. Another long story. We were apart for so long because he was running for his life and we can finally be together and now he's gone again. That's why I said pack comes first. I'm the one who encouraged him to become a leader. Who saw it inside of him. It was the right thing to do, but -" Caroline lifted her arms above her head, stretching them out before twisting them in front of her. " And I just suddenly made this all about me. Wow."

"It's okay." Derek smiled and was surprised that it was genuine. "It's a nice distraction. I think you already told me everything I needed to hear. It sounds like you're good at that."

"Good." Caroline nodded. "Ready to get back down there?"

"One thing first," Derek paused as he turned. "Your boyfriend, or whatever he is to you, give him time. Pack is important. But so are you."

"After everything, we were finally going to have time to just breathe this summer." Caroline threw her head back. "To be together without Klaus or evil ancient witches or anything. Just us. The summer before college. Together. Now I don't even know where he is."

"Summer isn't over yet."

"It isn't," Caroline glanced down over the parking lot, "but I think, I think we are."

"He'll come back to you," Derek placed a hand on her shoulder. "He's an idiot if he doesn't. The last person I let talk to me like you just did was my sister. Anyone who is as strong and smart as you is worth fighting for. You two will find each other."

"In the meantime," Caroline bounced off the ledge and back onto the roof, rolling her shoulders and setting a smile on her face, "the only people I'm going to concern myself with finding are Elena and your pack. And we will find them, Derek. All of them."


When Erica came to, bleeding but healing on a cold cement floor, she wasn't alone. Blinking up at the blurry shape, she smiled.

"Boyd?"

But then she squinted and the fuzzy form focused in on black hair and sharp, dark eyes and pale skin and not Boyd .

"Who are you? Where's Boyd?"

She made to sit up and a hand came against her shoulder.

"Calm down. They gave you a bunch of wolfsbane. That's good. Means you're a fighter."

"Where's Boyd?"

"I don't know who that is, but I've been in here alone for days."

"Who are you?"

"I'm a friend. My name's Tyler."

A/N: What do you think of the friendship forming between Caroline and Derek?