A/N: Okay! You've been waiting, I've been waiting, and my dog's been waiting… so here it is! The final piece of my puzzling story. Onto the last chappie!

Disclaimer: Wait, doesn't 'dis' refer to 'un'? How can I 'unclaim' something I never had in the first place: P Ah w/e. I don't own the peoples.

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"Argh…Nar…u…to!" Sasuke grabbed the blonde's collar and proceeded to shake him off. But Naruto's grip was still strong and his fury even stronger.

Got to… get him off… of me before… it's…. too late! Sasuke tried not to panic but he knew that if he didn't find an escape, he'd been out cold in no time flat.

"What's wrong… Sasuke? The great Uchiha can't take some…competition!" Naruto emphasized with extra force. Sasuke felt his fists loosen against his will. His vision blurred and the shadowed orange began to blot.

"No! I can't let him get…away!"

"Talking to yourself Sasuke!" He ceased slamming his head against the glass. Sasuke's jet-black hair dripped with the thick liquid and his eyes became heavy, his head drooped to the side unconsciously.

"Huh?" Naruto peered closer. "Sasuke? Hey! Sasuke!" There was no response from the teammate.

"Don't move." A stern voice and heavy hand fell upon Naruto.

/\/\/\/\/\

"Wha…what are you doing Itachi?" Green eyes stared up with concern at her 'lover'. Itachi gently pushed her off of him and pulled himself upright.

"What's wrong?"

Itachi remained silent as her slowly brought himself to his feet. Sakura lashed out and yanked his arm. "Itachi?" His head whipped around and his cold eyes narrowed. Sakura backed off and let him regain his...pleasant composure.

Her eyes begged for a reason, so Itachi shrugged and grinned savagely.

"You've paid enough."

Sakura looked like she had just been hit by a bus (A/N: We can only hope.) "What!" Itachi turned his back on her and reached for his clothes.

"Is that all I am to you! Some kind of…ATM!" (A/N: Again, don't know or care if they have atms in Naruto.)

He didn't answer.

Sakura jumped to her feet and grabbed his shoulder. "Answer me!" Tears streamed down her face, but before Itachi could even shoot her another silencing glare the door and window came crashing into the room.

"ACK!" Sakura instinctively leapt behind Itachi for covering who stood in the center of the room staring wickedly at the porcelain masks of the ANBU. His red eyes seemed to penetrate the heavy ceramic.

Without shuddering, the ninja recited what sounded like an entire scroll of Itachi's capture.

"Uchiha Itachi…"

He nodded.

"…It has been the mission of the ANBU organization to take you into custody on the charges of taking part in the alleged Akatsuki group, the murder of the Uchiha. …"

Sakura whimpered from behind the fugitive, blushing furiously when she heard a familiar voice.

It appeared that Naruto had made his way to the scene.

"What's goin' on in here? Why did you just bust in like that? Don't you know that's against the laws?" He stumbled into the room via the window. "Hey! Sakura you're back! Whoa! Why are you naked!" His eyes grew larger as he smiled widely at the victim.

She clung tighter to Itachi's shoulders and pressed up against him as if he could offer her more protection.

One of the members tossed her a blanket. She gratefully caught it and wrapped it around her body, releasing the oldest Uchiha son whom Naruto had only recently noticed. "WHAT! Whose this guy! And why's he naked?"

He was held back by the same masked ANBU. Only Sasuke's ungraceful entrance distracted him from his newfound foe and fiery temper tantrum. Seemingly he had regained consciousness by the assistance of one of the five intruders.

"You!"

Itachi turned his head slightly and gave Sasuke a knowing look. "Hello little brother. I've been expecting you."

Sasuke growled and took a few charging steps forward. A few men jumped to block him but the move was unnecessary. Sasuke took himself out, weakly stumbling to his knees.

"Sasuke!" Sakura ran over to him, Naruto's face glowing red.

Itachi turned his attention back around to listen to the remaining charges. "… Filching a car and…" He nodded to Sakura. "Sleeping with a minor."

"She's no minor."

"Sakura…"

"Yes Sasuke!"

"Get away from me." His entire body shook angrily as he forced himself to his feet. "I'm going to kill you bastard."

"Hm." Itachi's lips curled and he burst out in insane laughter. "HAHAHA! You've been saying that for so many years now." He stopped abruptly and shot a daring look across the room. "Show me."

Without a second bidding, Sasuke roared with hatred and ran full speed.

"But I knocked you out!" Naruto saw him fly past and charged after him.

"Don't touch him Naruto!" Sakura clutched the blanket and pursued.

"STOP! ALL OF YOU!" ANBU ninjas intercepted all three, wrestling them to the ground. Itachi smirked and snatched his clothes. "Hey! Don't you move!"

"I'm just getting my pants on. Shows over, my chijin." Once he had pulled them on, he dealt the captor a heavy blow to the abdomen, knocking the wind out of him and giving Itachi a second to escape.

"What the… HE'S GETTING AWAY!" The four others disappeared in a flash but the screech of rubber told them they were too late.

In the meantime, Naruto had taken the opportunity to pounce on Sasuke. Sakura (as always) was screaming her head off in a corner.

The man regained his strength and tore the two boys apart. "For the final time. STOP." They paused. Naruto crossed his arms and Sasuke reached for his kunai.

"Now will one of you tell me who your sensei is?"

/\/\/\/\

Sakura rested her head in her hands and stared out the shattered window. ANBU had left after her mother was contacted and the whole team was going to be in big trouble with Kakashi sensei. She sighed at her misfortune.

He wasn't worth any of this. Now my reputation is ruined and Sasuke'll probably never want to be with me now.

The streets were relatively desolate. Other than a passing cat no one was around, or so it momentarily appeared. The footsteps of a shadowy figure broke the hazy silence.

Huh? Whose that? Sakura sat up attentively and peered out. The person was making good time in getting to where ever they were headed. The straight path the character took didn't whind around the Haruno home.

What now? She lifted her head and squinted to get a better view. The silhouette stopped only a few feet away and bent down. It was picking something up, but Sakura couldn't make it out. Suddenly a rock was hurled at the already broken window, flying inside and hitting her square in the forehead.

"Owwww!"

"Sakura!" The voice was now familiar.

Ino. "What do you want! Can't you see I'm already in trouble as it is?" Ino walked up to the frame and peered in.

"What'd you do billboar..."

"I'm not in the mood Ino. Go away. I'll see you later."

"No Sakura! You can't... ugh! Just hold on for..." Ino hopped inside and tossed a folded sheet of paper at her friend. "Look! Look look look!" She stubbornly prodded the sheet Sakura now held.

"You came by just to give me this? Ino can't it wait?" Sakura whined and tried to return the paper to Ino. "Just look at it then I'll go."

The pink haired 'victim' of the night let out a load sigh and flipped through it muttering to herself.

"What am I supposed to be seeing?"

Ino gawked and moved closer to point out the suspicious information. "Ugh! Okay, do I have to walk you through this? This is some background information I found on that tHrOnE-of-AiBo guy you've been talking to on Wait a second. What're you doing going around looking this stuff up?"

"Um… That's not important. What is important is all the websites he's affiliated with."

"He? I'm pretty sure it's a girl." Ino raised an eyebrow, "That's not what I found."

"What!" Sakura looked at the sheet with newfound intrigue and read through the sites. "Baking Buddies official membership website, Save the Squirrels specie fansite, Fitness 101, Tree Treatment conservation site…"

"Yes, yes just go down farther! I think it's the second last one or something…."

Sakura scanned through for any eye catching bits of information that Ino would find pleasing. The faster I find it, the faster she goes…

But then she did stop at something rather… surprising.

"You mean this Nation's Pride website?"

"Mhm!" Ino looked rather pleased with herself.

"Wow, that really is strange. Because we both know that it's sooo strange to feel pride for your village!" She sneered sarcastically.

"Huh?" Ino was taken back. "No…. It's not like that! Here, I checked it out and everything. He even has a profile." She pulled another folded piece out of her pocket and gave it to Sakura.

"It's… It's a…. a…. a…. GAY WEBSITE!"

Ino nodded fiercely. "Well actually it's a hetero website. But look who it…"

"IT'S ROCK LEE!"

And for the second time that night, she fell unconscious.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"Hello team." Kakashi fell gracefully from a tree in front of his team.

She had expected him to be late as usual, but all three knew he wouldn't have good news. This made the wait even more painful.

Speaking of pain, Sasuke and Naruto both wore heavy wads of bandages. So last night really was serious. Hn. From the way my house looks, I should have figured.

"Morning Kakashi sensei." Sakura mumbled. The boy's greetings were less understandable. Seeing as they only consisted of a mixture of grunts and mutters they were difficult to make out.

Sakura tried to read her teacher's expression or sense any anger in his tone, but Kakashi was blank and expressionless.

"So all of you decided to take part in this online… dating service? And from there things went down hill…"

They couldn't bear to look him in the eye.

"Sasuke, Naruto…. You're team members and look at what you've done to one another." They looked at each other's bandaged face with blaming glares.

"Sakura…" He continued. "You were mislead by one of the most dangerous, unpredictable men out there."

Naruto looked over and grumbled, "Told you we shoulda gone out."

Kakashi cleared his throat. "Seeing as none of you seem to be in any shape to practice… or work as a team…" They gave him exhausted zombie-like stares. "I've decided to cancel today's practice. On one condition."

Sakura and Naruto looked hopeful.

"No more of these sites. They only distract you from what really matters."

/\/\/\/\/\

I thought a day off would be great… but I'm so bored! How is this possible!

Naruto stared up at the ceiling and tossed kunais into the tiles (he ran out of pencils an hour ago). Suddenly one loosened itself and fell.

"ACK!" Naruto scrambled to get out of the way, but it only hit the keys of his computer. "Hahaha." He picked himself up and headed for the kitchen…. Untillll…..

BLOOP

Naruto turned. On the screen was….

A pop-up!

"Cool!" Hey I never did get that ramen gift certificate…. Maybe they lost my address. What's this one for?

"Knock down the samurai and win… a free 20" plasma TV! Sure!" Wait. Better read the fine print….

He read through the details quickly. One month membership to Nation's Never heard of it before but Kakashi sensei shouldn't have a problem with it. Afterall, it is about pride… What do I got to lose?

click

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A/N: (Bow.) Thank you, thank you, thank you to all those giving me support! I applaud you. Another one gone… so what'd you think? Next time I think I'll plan it out before I go off on a tangent. But I hope it entertained you all for the time it was added to.

; ) See you next time around,

Lotus.Under.Thorns