Rising Emotions Chapter 3
By Karen Hart
Shion leaned against the door, slouching a bit as she kicked off her boots, closing her eyes in profoundest relief. Much better. They didn't make those things for comfort. She pushed herself upright again and quickly shed her jacket, stuffing it into the nearby coat closet before making her way down the short hallway and over to the sofa, passing a stack of plastic crates on her way. She'd have to get on with unpacking soon. Later, she thought impatiently.
It was a new apartment, rather more spacious than her last—rank had its privileges, after all. Dark blue seemed to be the overlying theme, from the carpet to the upholstery to the tinting of the window panes. There was abundant shelving and counter space, with built-ins cunningly added in. The walls were a clear, unblemished cream. All in all, it was more than adequate. And best of all was the head, with its full-sized tub and seemingly endless supply of hot water.
That sounded nice, Shion thought, closing her eyes and imagining herself slip under a mountain of bubbles, a cup of hot tea in her hands. She added in soft, soothing music to the fantasy. Well, why not? She had everything she needed, if she could find them among the mess of boxes. So inspired, she hauled herself upright, and began searching through the crates.
In minutes she had the requisite tea on a tray, a steaming pot of the stuff, ginger scent curling up from the spout. The bubble bath was easy enough to find after that, the bottle stuffed down the side of a container marked "BATH". She set the tray down on a little table next the bath, and with one hand switched the taps on. The bubble bath followed, then, a cap full at first, then a steady stream from the bottle. Satisfied with the water level, she switched on her connection gear, searching for a public music station. Something instrumental, with no commercials. She searched a bit, nodding to herself when she found something decent.
Good enough! On that thought she peeled off the rest of her clothing, and slid under the bubbles. Now this was nice. Warm water. Hot tea. No matter that the bath was a luxury that came with a rank she hadn't originally wanted. It was hers now and a selfish part of her wanted to enjoy it. So much for shame, Shion mused as she set the teacup down and sank even lower, until her ears filled with water and her voice sounded funny. She hummed a bit to amuse herself, then surfaced a moment later, letting the water drain from her ears.
Another sip of tea, and she found herself feeling, god, almost philosophical as she thought of why she was in that tub in the first place. Was she starting to get over him, she wondered to herself over another sip of tea. She closed her eyes and slid back down, careful to keep the cup above water level. Probably not, the thought floated to the surface. Not if she had any decency in her. She still missed him—still, ha!—it was only eight weeks ago—occasionally catching glimpses of his phantom now and again.
No, she wasn't over him. Just starting to accept his absence. That was all. She sighed in irritation at herself, set the cup down again and shifted onto her side, suddenly displaced water hitting the floor tiles a second later. This was supposed to be relaxing, and here she was thinking about someone wasn't there. Someone who…couldn't…be there.
Shion shivered then, the hot water notwithstanding, and she splashed around a bit to distract herself. Get the mind off that track. Relax. No use in dwelling on that. It was over. "Stop moping," she told herself sternly. A groan followed. No good. She still felt…
She still felt guilty, was the truth of it, no matter how illogical it was to feel that way. He'd died protecting her. She'd never known his feelings—the word sounded odd in her mind, almost halted—until it was too late. And here she was, enjoying a bath because he was dead. It was selfish, almost disrespectful, even. God, when had her thoughts made such a depressing turn? She sat upright and wrapped her arms around her torso, scowling at the fixtures. She didn't deserve the amenities she had. Suddenly she wanted her old quarters, with its small tub and worn furnishings. This didn't feel right.
A moment later Shion hauled herself shivering back out of the water, casting about for a towel. Now she realized she'd forgotten one. Of course. And no linen closet in the head. Just another minor irritation to add to her suddenly foul mood. At least the bathroom crates were close to the door. She hauled one in, goose bumps forming on her limbs. Thank god it was the right one, she thought as she wrapped the terrycloth around herself. She shut the connection gear off a moment later, and left the tea where it was. She'd deal with that later.
Not a minute later she found herself in her room, face down in the pillows and utterly exhausted. Her stomach rumbled. Screw dinner. Screw unpacking, too. Sleep sounded real good just then.
But then again, maybe it was just another way for her to escape.
