Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Doctor Who
Four
"What did she say!" Jackie asked for what seemed like the millionth time that night.
"I've told you," Jake sighed. "Just something about the Oncoming Storm approaching...did she ever mention this before?"
"How the bleedin' hell should I know?" she rounded on him furiously. "She spent the last few years travelling with that no good Doctor. If anyone would know, it would be him." she let out a noise of frustration. "And he's gone!"
"Calm down Jacks." Pete muttered from his place by the window.
"Calm down! You expect me to calm down!" she turned to her husband even more furious now. "My Rose is up there...changed, because of him, and you expect me to calm down!"
"All I'm saying is that you getting upset isn't helping." he was getting worked up now. Jake could see the storm building and decided to leave before it broke.
"I'm going to check on Rose." he practically leapt to his feet and was by the door in two bounds. Not a moment too soon either, he heard Jackie explode just as the door snapped shut. He paused by Rose's door, unsure whether he should enter. Even after all the Doctor had shown him in his brief stay in their world, he was afraid...he caught himself and shook his head. Afraid of what? Rose? That was ridiculous...that was like saying he was afraid of Mickey. Although Mickey had become considerably more intimidating than he had been. Pushing these thoughts aside, he slowly opened the door and slipped in.
The first thing he noticed was the empty bed. Damn it. Jackie was going to murder him...He cast increasingly more panicked glances about him, then he found her and the sight took his breath away.
She was perched on the window ledge, eyes staring out at the moonlit city. Her honey coloured tresses fell loose around her shoulders, shining in the moonlight. Her robe fell from her slender shoulders, revealing creamy white skin. She was so beautiful, almost angelic...then he saw the tears. Silvery trails criss-crossed her cheeks, silent sobs racked her body. It broke Jakes' heart to see this strong, determined, beautiful woman cry.
Without a word he closed the distance between them. He was behind her now, could smell her sweet, floral perfume as it mingled with the air rushing through the open window. She was yet to acknowledge him. He reached for her, his fingers inches from her shoulder when he stopped. She
spoke.
"Doctor?" he could hear the hope and wonder in her voice, and it pained him to have to rob her of her dream.
"No Rose." he placed a hand on her shoulder, turning her to face him. "It's me, Jake..." he stopped, stunned. Instead of looking into her deep chocolate coloured eyes, he found himself looking into a pair of golden orbs. They seemed to glow and flash with some power. Yet as suddenly as it appeared, the light faded, leaving her eyes hollow, almost empty, haunted.
"Jake?" she breathed, her eyes finding his. He nodded slightly, his throat constricted. "Oh God." she gasped, burying her head in his shoulder. Without thinking he wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin in the nape of her neck. He could feel the sobs racking her body as she cried into him. He could feel it tugging at his heart strings.
"Hey, don't cry Rose." he stroked her hair gently, inhaling the scent of her golden locks. "Please don't cry."
"I thought you were him." she muttered into his shirt. "I thought that..."
"Don't worry about it. It's perfectly natural for a dream to linger..."
"It wasn't a dream. He was here Jake. I felt him."
"What do you mean you felt him?" Jake asked, puzzled, sitting by her side on the window ledge.
"Didn't you ever notice?." she returned her gaze to the city. "You could be in a room full of people, just milling around, talking. Yet you would know the exact moment he entered that room. Even if he didn't say a word or make a sound, even if everyone else ignored him. You'd know instantly that it was the Doctor. He just had this feeling, this presence...you remind me of him so much." she suddenly turned to him.
"Why?"
"I dunno, you just do." she shrugged, her eyes never leaving his face. "You've got this presence about you, I don't know what it is...It was you earlier wasn't it? Holding my hand, that was you?"
He nodded smiling slightly. "I couldn't leave you."
"Why?"
"I don't know..." he responded sharply, looking away. "I just couldn't...I guess there was just something, a presence." he shook his head slightly. " It felt like you needed me, like you were reaching out across a void inside..." he was almost whispering now, unsure whether he should continue, unsure that what he was saying was true, He hadn't realised until know the reason for his staying. "...reaching for me because I was the only one that could help. I know how daft that must sound," he added hastily. "but it's true." he stood up, shaking out a cramp in his leg. "You gonna tell me what this dream was about now, or do I have to stay all night? Cos I will you know." he moved over to her bed and perched on the edge, facing her. Close enough for comfort, not close enough to make her feel threatened.
"No, but please don't take this the wrong way. It's just that...you wouldn't believe me if I did." she shook her head slightly. "Plus you'll only tell mum...and Mickey. The only reason you're here is that mum made you come check on me. Isn't it?" her eyes found his once more.
"No." Jake responded feeling a little hurt by this. "I came, because I care...and I hate seeing you like this. Where is the Rose I know? The Rose that saved the Earth so many times?"
"That wasn't me, it was..."
"No Rose, you did just as much. Especially...that day." he hesitated, watching her closely. "If you hadn't pulled that lever, locked it in place...who knows what would have happened...Thank you."
"For what?" Now she was puzzled.
"For saving my life." he paused, embarrassed and awkward. "I better get going. Sun up in an hour, then my shift starts...but you know where I am yeah?...and Rose," he was by her side once more. "I would never judge you or repeat anything you tell me. I'll see you later." he gave her a quick hug, so unlike him.
He normally was so reserved, so distant. If you asked him later why he had done it...he wouldn't have been able to tell you, he would just shrug and say it felt right. His reason for everything these days.
Rose wasn't the only one missing someone...
"C'mon Doc'" Jack muttered for what must have been the fiftieth time in the last five minutes. He was completely alone in the TARDIS now, even the machine itself had stopped trying to make small talk and was directing its energies into more constructive happenings. Like helping the Doctor and maintaining their orbit...and what was he doing? The great Jack Harkness was sitting, holding the hand of some alien. No, Jack corrected himself. Not just some alien. The Doctor was a better man than he'd ever be even though he couldn't be any less of a human. He felt so helpless. He needed Rose. Not for the first time he found himself wishing for the petite blonde that meant so much to them both. Jack couldn't have felt more hopeless if he tried, he was just so helpless...if Rose was here...she'd take his hand in hers, tell him everything would be alright and he in turn would comfort her, hold her close in ways he'd never dare if the Doctor was awake.
Rose. He knew she was the one that haunted the Doctors dreams and waking moments too. He'd managed to build up a picture of what had torn them apart and it was terrible. He wouldn't have wished that on anyone...his thoughts drifted to her. If the Doctor was making such a poor show of coping, what must she be going through? She was after all only human...just another silly ape as the Doctor would have said. Only human...and so young...only nineteen, whereas the Doctor...he was nine hundred years old so more than capable of coping...she was just one of many after all, so he was used to saying goodbye...why was this so different? She was what was different, Jack reminded himself, so different to any of the humans the Doctor had encountered before...almost his equal. Not intellectually, no one could be that. She was his equal in the ways that mattered though. In spirit, her courage, determination...stubbornness. Infact she was his superior in many ways, only they were both afraid to admit it.
He could feel himself nodding off as he sat by his side. His eyelids flickered shut, only to snap open seconds later. He could not allow himself to sleep. What if... there were too many what ifs to bear thinking about. He just had to stay awake...
