September 21st 2022

Chapter 264
Our Hope For Memory

There had been a point, right as she'd finally come home with the baby, where Maya had been left to think that she might not actually get to have this day as she'd imagined it. Looking back on it now, she knew a lot of that had to do with just coming off of the whole ordeal of Aubrey's birth, and she was more than within her rights to feel that way. She'd been feeling this gaping sort of disconnect between herself and great sections of her life, and it had taken the days and weeks since then to find her way back. She couldn't even say if she'd located and mended all those broken connections yet, but she felt a lot closer to being there now than she'd done then. And for that, she got to be here today… the last day of classes.

"Alright, Miss Friar, you are ready for your first day of school," Maya smiled as she settled her into her stroller. "Technically, you've been here before, it's true, but you were still inside my belly at the time. This is the first time you get to see it with your own eyes."

Ben had been the one to drop them off. Both Eliza and Emma had an early start today, and while Lucas could easily have been the one to bring the two of them, he was finally back at work now, and he also had a thing today. She knew he would have favored her over it with little to no hesitation, but she didn't want him to have to do that. Ben had offered, and that had been the end of that.

All of her groups were special in their own ways, but today of all days the honors went to the seniors, and like every single year she'd been a teacher here, it continued to feel semi unfair that she should start the day immediately with them and then be done with it. She would have gladly swapped the seniors and juniors for this day, but she couldn't do that, could she?

Setting all her nostalgia aside, it had really been so important for her to be there today. Already, she would have been happy to come and see everyone again, show them the baby… But with everything that had happened, and the outpouring of notes, cards, letters… They had all done so much, letting her know that they were thinking about her, and she appreciated it to the point that appreciation felt like too small of a word. It was enough so that, as much of an effort as it had demanded, she had expanded her diary closing this time around and done something at the back of each and every one of their diaries, in all four groups, to thank them.

"Hey, hey…" Dylan was at first startled and then excited when he saw them come along, just after entering the building. She hadn't told him that she would be there, on the off chance that she changed her mind at the last minute, and for that he hadn't done his thing where he'd ended up 'coincidentally' in the parking lot just as she arrived, so that they could head into the school together. But now she was here, and so was Aubrey, and that got the smile going on him in a flash. He came toward them, practically gliding across the floor to stop before the stroller and look inside. "I tell you, these freshmen are getting smaller and smaller every year," he shook his head with an exaggerated sigh.

"Yeah, and this one is just going to sleep in class most of the day," Maya met him tone for tone, laughing as he moved to hug her. For as long as they'd known each other, he'd always been one who came off goofy and in his own head, but he was far more observant than some people gave him credit for. Back then, it had allowed him to catch on to the situation as it had been with her father, and today, while the reflex would be right there to ask how she was doing, as though she wasn't back on track, he would know that she didn't want the questions. She was sure to get them throughout the day, more than once or ten times, but he would not be one of those who inquired. She could have hugged him again.

Maya carried the baby in her arms as they went up the hall, and Dylan led the empty stroller and her bags for her. These were soon transferred to Barton Day, who came to meet them when he saw the trio coming. In that moment, she was suddenly hyper aware of the fact that this would likely be the last time he was her substitute in this way. Sure, she might have the occasional day or two here and there if she was sick or had some other situation preventing her from coming to work, but with Lucas' plan going forward, their plan… This would be her last maternity leave, for all they knew. Yes, it was still unclear what she would do about the start of the coming year, if she would take a few more weeks with the baby, who would be all of three months old by then, in which case she would still need someone, hopefully him, but still… This would be another chapter closing, along with the one her seniors were closing today, and for Barton…

His last son was finishing high school today. Anton would soon be graduating and be off to med school before they knew it. He'd finished top of his class, and if that wasn't the capper to all this… But then, even if this was Anton's day, wholly so, as he deserved for it to be, it could not be ignored that both he and his father, and even his mother and his older brothers, had just one thing on their mind, one person, the one who couldn't be there to mark the occasion. And they had to acknowledge it, in the way they'd meant to all along.

Anton came to class before everyone else, and his father already had the ladder out. Did he want to do it? He did. With Barton spotting him, Anton went up and carefully removed Lambert's drawing from the wall. He handed it to his father before coming down, for fear of damaging it. When he reached the ground, the two of them stood there for a moment, looking at this page that Lambert had touched, had covered with this image of a place that had been special to him, to his family. They had seen it hanging up there for so long, but to see it up close again, it was like all these details revealed themselves for the first time. They posed together, Barton with his arm around his son's shoulder as the two of them held the drawing before themselves, one hand from each at either side, and Maya took the picture, which she would send on to them, to commemorate the moment.

"Thank you," Barton told her, and she knew it wasn't just about the photo. She quietly nodded. You're welcome.

"It looks weird now," Anton commented, looking up at the wall, the one empty spot vacated in an array of other students' work, all of it more recent than this one, which had been left up with a purpose.

"Well, after today, these will come down, and new pieces will go up," Maya reminded him.

"I can take the rest down for you," Anton offered. He would only have to stare at that blank space briefly, but it unsettled him. So, Maya deferred to Barton, who was still in charge for the day while she was a visitor.

By the time more seniors arrived, the father and son were working together to take down the artwork from the class wall. The students were all surprised and happy to see both their regular teacher and the baby. Maya had her first pass of questions after her health, and she told them the truth as it was. She was better, but she was also seeing to a newborn along with a handful of other small children, so she was exhausted. But that wasn't going to stop her being here today.

"Hi!" Kelsey gasped when she saw them. She came forward, ahead of an equally surprised Ava, Olivia, and Britt. Maya bent to hug her. Under the circumstances, it was more than warranted. She had those big 'you're here!' eyes, and Maya didn't know how else to respond. She still remembered when Haruna Farrell had reached out to her, wanting to ensure that her daughter would be seen to, in a class she so looked forward to. And now she was graduating. It might not have helped that Maya had been pregnant through what felt like great swaths of this girl's time among them, both her and her entire graduating class, but still… It could leave Maya speechless to consider it sometimes. "Hey, Aubrey," she leaned to greet the baby, taking her tiny hand in hers.

"I wasn't sure you'd come," Olivia smiled as she came and embraced her teacher next.

"I was about… ninety-nine percent sure that I would, but in case that didn't work out, I didn't want to come back on my word," Maya told her, and Olivia nodded. She remembered when she'd come sliding into class that first day, so excited to begin. The ending wasn't exactly how she might have imagined it, but she was here, and she was genuinely excited for the future, and that was what mattered most.

Just four years back, she would not have guessed that Ava Nash would be sad to leave her class, or any class. But this morning, after that last period in art ended for her and everyone started to leave, she hung back, waiting even for her station mates to step out of the room before she turned to her teacher. If she didn't know any better, Maya would think she was on the verge of tears… and maybe she was. Now, she hugged her teacher – former teacher – and it might not have been the first time she did so, but it was no less meaningful to her. Maya hugged her back, gave her a good teetering squeeze hug before standing back, holding to her arms with a smile. Ava's own smile, still reserved as it was both in size and in expression, came with a light laughter and the brushing away of errant tears. They would still see each other at graduation; they would still see each other plenty of times, with the bands, but this was different. This was about this space they'd shared for all this time.

"You know, I used to be so mad at you," Ava confessed, and Maya smirked. "I mean, I wasn't, really. It was more complicated than that. I guess maybe it was more… frustration… because I couldn't just… brush you off. And I didn't know why but I didn't want to."

"Yeah, I can have that effect," Maya recognized with a smile, and Ava nodded.

"But it meant a lot… once I could admit it to myself. Coming here… I felt safe, and I didn't know why. It wasn't just like nothing could happen to me, more that… I could be myself, and no one would yell at me for it or say that I was causing trouble." Maya could only nod, feeling emotions heavy in her throat. "You're okay now, right?" Ava asked after a moment, and for how much she had dreaded people asking her anything like that today, coming from the likes of her… she didn't mind it.

"I'm okay," Maya smiled at her. "More than okay."

TO BE CONTINUED


See you tomorrow! - mooners