WingedKatt here with Nick's playlist: 'All I Need Is A Miracle' by Mike and the Mechanics; 'Smile' by Uncle Kracker; 'Love In The First Degree' by Alabama; and 'Somebody' by Bryan Adams. Hope you enjoy the music as well as the chapter.

PS: You might need a few Kleenex for the first half of the chapter...maybe. =)


As Nick neared the café, he saw that Thing 1 and Thing 2 had already left (which he was glad for), leaving Judy alone at the table. She was engrossed with her phone and he had to resist the urge to snap a picture at her cute look of concentration. Being accused of a stalker wasn't something he wanted on his record just after signing up for the ZPA—even if the charges were immediately dropped.

Waltzing up to his adorable girlfriend, he asked, "Ready to go home?"

Looking up, Judy smiled brightly. "Definitely."

After getting Judy situated in the wheelchair, it didn't take long to return to the jeep. After getting Judy comfortable (and grinning while she craned her head around to look in the back seat, hoping to see what he'd picked up), Nick slipped into the driver seat and turned to his honeybun. She was more than ready for the kiss she knew was coming. Not making her wait, he reached over and cupped her cheeks, then pulled her towards him while leaning over to touch her twitching nose with his. "I love you, Judy." She positively beamed at him and her eyes got a little watery, and then he pressed his lips gently to hers.

Judy's eyes closed and she gave herself over to the soft kiss. Reaching up, she slid her small paws around the back of his neck and buried her fingers in his thick fur. The kiss was tender but ended too quickly. Opening her eyes as Nick pulled back, she met his burning emeralds, then felt his hot tongue lick her lips, bringing a gasp of pleasure to her. Feeling his large, canine tongue invade her mouth brought a long moan from her as he teased her much smaller lagomorph one.

The kiss was long and slow, and although it lacked the passion from earlier, it still filled Judy with warmth and happiness as she felt Nick's care, love and tenderness in it. The fact he (eventually) let her explore his mouth in return was icing on the cake. While melting into his touch, she still couldn't believe that he was hers. That this wonderful, caring, hot, sexy fox was all hers—and no one else's. Knowing that she'd never have to share him with anyone else sent a warm tingle down her spine, as she had lost count of how many of her sisters had started exclusively dating some buck, only to be dumped a month later because she wasn't what he was expecting. Or seeing her sister dumping him for the same reason. But that wasn't something she'd ever have to worry about with Nick. Moaning into the gentle kiss again, she thought, Nope. I'll never have to worry about that with Nick. My fox.

As Nick finally pulled back and rested his forehead against Judy's, he took a deep breath and flashed her a very happy smile. Sitting up, he caressed her cheeks with his thumbs a moment longer, then murmured, "Let's go home."

"Yeah." Judy was too happy to say anything else, and then they both sat back and buckled in. After starting the jeep, Nick pulled out his phone and plugged it into the jeep's stereo system before opening his playlist again. After finding the song he wanted, he hit play and set his phone in his cup holder. Flashing Judy a wide smile as 'All I Need is a Miracle' by Mike & the Mechanics began playing, he put the jeep in reverse and pulled out of the parking space. As the intro music played, he explained, "This is how I felt after the press conference." With a shake of his head, he glanced out his window, then turned his attention back to the road and cars in front of him while explaining, "I didn't care about ever seeing you again and it took almost a month to get over the worst of my anger, and then I started going through these mood swings. I was either depressed with missing you and wanting to hear your voice again and make you laugh, or angry at you for your betrayal, or angry at myself for believing in you—for allowing you to hurt me."

Glancing briefly over and meeting her watery, amethyst gaze, he continued, "When missing you got too bad, I'd take your carrot pen—which, you know, reminds me of you, Carrots—out to the Rainforest District and ride the sky tram." Pausing a moment, he then said, "That was the turning point for me. You saving me from Manchas woke me up and made me really look at you. But the sky tram . . ." Nick shook his head as he watched a spotted hyena wearing a blue-jean jacket and riding a Harley Davison cut across the lane two car-lengths in front of him as the spotted hyena headed for the turn lane. Glancing at Judy briefly (and seeing the questions in her eyes), he then looked back at the road and continued his tale. "After my dad died, it was hard, but I still had faith in the goodness of others."

With a scowl, Nick's ears flicked back as he explained, "But the fiasco with the Junior Ranger Scouts was a huge slap in the face, and coupled with how my dad's murder was swept under the rug, I started to close myself off and didn't talk much about what was bothering me." Nick's voice softened as he added, "To everyone but Demetri, anyways. He was my rock. I knew I could always count on him and we shared everything. He's the only one I told the full details of what happened that night. My mom knew something bad had happened, and I told her about being bullied, but that was it." Glancing out the side window, he muttered, "I never told her about being muzzled."

Reaching over, Judy caressed his arm, then gave his forearm a comforting squeeze. Nick never really talked much about his brother, so this was a rare gem for her.

Turning to Judy, he gave her a bitter smile at the tragic memory. "It actually should have been Demetri there that night." At Judy's questioning head tilt, he explained, "We both wanted to be in the Junior Rangers Scouts, but mom could only afford one uniform, so we played Paper, Rock, Scissors. I lost and it really bummed me out since I saw it as a way to be helpful and prove foxes could be trusted." Gripping the steering wheel tightly while staring out the front window, he continued, "Demetri surprised me the day of the meeting by giving me the uniform. Said it would mean more if it was me wearing it."

Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes briefly as they were at a red light, he explained, "Demetri was always like that. We both looked up to Dad and wanted to be like him, but after his death, Demetri felt it was his responsibility as the oldest of us boys to be the male of the house and take care of the family." With a heavy sigh, Nick continued, "As young as he was, Demetri always tried to act grown-up, which meant he usually put mine and Anya's and mom's needs above his own. Seeing us succeed always made him smile." With a slightly warmer laugh, he added, "When we got a little older, sometimes me and Demetri would argue about who got to do what because I wanted to see him enjoy himself, while he wanted me to have all the fun—at least when we had to choose who got to have the fun."

Judy bit her lip, then said softly, "He sounds like a really good, big brother."

Nick glanced over in appreciation of her understanding and replied, "Oh, he was . . ." With his voice dropping to barely a whisper, Nick repeated, "He was." Glancing out his window and staring mindlessly at the license plate of the large, brown and black suburban one car up and one lane over from the jeep, his mind wandered aimlessly down the dark memories of the past. While thinking of his brother, Nick muttered just as quietly, "It actually should have been me hit by that drunk driver."

With her eyes widening, Judy squeezed Nick's arm again. She wanted to ask what he meant, but wasn't sure Nick was ready to explain himself. He'd already shared so much with her (which made Judy extremely grateful for his trust) and she didn't want to push him beyond what he was comfortable with.

Glancing over to meet her patient gaze, Nick took a deep breath and returned his gaze to the small, sea-green Astro van sitting at the red light in front of him (this light was a particularly long one), then explained, "We had stayed out really late and were both tired from playing hard that day and I wasn't paying much attention to my surroundings. Demetri had shoved me for something stupid I'd said, and I stumbled over some trash or rock on the sidewalk. I was too tired and laughing too hard to catch my balance and ended up falling in the road. I wasn't hurt or anything, and so kept laughing. Demetri was laughing at me, too, and since there weren't any cars out that late at night, I didn't feel the need to hurry and get off the road."

Grinning slightly at the memory, Nick elaborated. "We'd been down at the large park near our school practicing some agility moves our dad had taught us before he died and were having too much fun to quit." Meeting Judy's inquisitive gaze, he added, "We should have been in bed hours ago, but we kept trying to outmaneuver each and didn't want to go home. Not that anyone was waiting at home for us," Nick muttered softly. "It was Friday night and Anya was staying at a friend's house to finish a class project while mom was working late—of course." With his frown returning, Nick continued, "Anyways, we were in that exhausted, sleep-deprived state where everything seems funny and you can't stop laughing."

Nick's voice dropped back down to a pained whisper that Judy had to strain to hear. "At least, until we heard the car screeching down the road. I was lying on the side of the road, not in the middle, and we were under a street lamp, so the drunk should have seen me, but he never even slowed down, let alone try to avoid me. I could have jumped out the way, but I just . . . froze. I couldn't think, I couldn't move . . . I just sat there. I did raise my paws to shield my face and closed my eyes while waiting for the car to hit me—but it wasn't the car that hit me." With eyes squeezed shut and a pained whine coming from his throat, Nick choked out, "Demetri jumped in and pushed me out of the way, so the car hit him instead." Taking a deep, shuddering breath, Nick kept his eyes shut as the bloody memories flashed across his mind. He always blamed himself for his brother's death, and the guilt felt just as strong today as it did back then.

Judy saw several tears slide down Nick's cheek, even as she felt several tears run down her own cheek. No wonder Nick still has nightmares about his brother's death, she silently sobbed to herself, He's beating himself up over Demetri's death. Wishing they weren't in traffic so she could give her fox a comforting hug and soothing head rub, the heartfelt moment was shattered as the large black Ford truck behind them honked its horn—the light had finally turned green.

Nick wiped his eyes, then shook the dark mood off. After pushing his horrid memories back down, he felt surprised how easy it was. Normally the memories would haunt him for hours, but Judy's comforting paw and understanding presence soothed some of his raw nerves (having spoken about his dad's and brother's death earlier today might have helped, too). Feeling a weight lifted off his chest from sharing this terrifying piece of his past with his honeybun, Nick set his foot on the gas pedal and felt the jeep move forward.

Turning his mind back to their earlier conversation and Judy's original (silent) question about the sky tram, he said, "Okay, we've gotten way off topic now." Taking another deep breath and feeling himself calm down further, he said, "My reason for telling you about Demetri was so you could understand how monumental it was for me to tell you about the Junior Rangers Scouts." Meeting Judy's gaze for an instant, he stated, "You are the second person I've ever told about being muzzled." Turning his attention back to the sea-green van in front of him, he waited for a response from Judy, but at her continued silence and comforting paw on his arm, he said, "I'm still not sure why I told you. I think I felt a kindred spirit with you after seeing how Bogo and the other cops treated you." With a shake of his head, he continued, "Anyways, telling you about the muzzling was huge for me, but even more shocking was your answer." Glancing at Judy again, he asked, "Do you remember what you said?"

Licking her lips (which were suddenly feeling dry), Judy whispered, "You're so much more than that."

"Bingo." With a warm grin, Nick explained, "Besides my family, Honey was the only other mammal to ever tell me that, but she was a predator and we related to each other. She'd lost her husband and son while I lost my dad and twin brother." Reaching over briefly, he brushed Judy's cheek while saying, "But you—you're a bunny, prey and a member of the fuzz, and I just spent the better part of the day demeaning you and wasting your time and yet you still believed I could be more than a shifty fox."

Judy nodded sadly as she thought about what happened after finding the missing mammals. With guilt twisting her guts, she whispered, "And then the press conference happened."

"Yes, that blasted conference happened." Nick stared ahead while tightly gripping the steering wheel again. "I hated you. You gave me hope and then turned around and stabbed me in the back. But as much as I hated you for what you said and did, I hated myself more because I allowed myself to believe in you, to give you the power to hurt me." Breathing slowly while thinking of the last three months, he continued, "I couldn't forget what you said, though, and several times I thought of tracking you down and asking you about it." With a shake of his head, he added, "I even thought about stopping by the ZPD and asking for you, but was afraid how they would react to a fox walking into the station and requesting a few minutes of your time." With a bitter snort, he said, "Seeing how Staggson tried booking me for merely asking for a ZPA application, it's probably best that I didn't show up."

Judy had been listening quietly while her mind ran around in circles and her heart was squeezed painfully at his many confessions. Hearing the details of Demetri's death and his obvious guilt for being the cause (at least in his mind—the drunk was the one at fault, but the pain in Nick's voice told Judy he blamed himself for being in the road), Judy desperately wished they were already home so she could comfort her fox. As Nick spoke of his worries about entering the ZPD, her ears perked up, then fell back while remembering how he was treated this morning and seeing how his fears were justified. It's not fair, she thought. Nick was the best mammal she knew, and yet he was treated so deplorably for no other reason than his species.

Curling her free paw into a tight fist, she felt her anger from this morning returning. Before, she only thought about the pain and suffering he might face at the ZPA, but now she realized he might have it just as bad, or worse, at the ZPD itself. With anger and determination smoldering in her amethyst gaze, Judy vowed to stick with him at the department and make sure no one disrespected her fox. And if anyone was actually stupid enough to hurt Nick, they'd find themselves flat on their backs in the infirmary, moaning and groaning, after she dragged their worthless tails into the sparring ring.

As they both fell into a comfortable silence, Nick and Judy finally remembered about the music that was still playing. As they'd both been engrossed in their conversation, they'd missed the whole song. Reaching down just before his playlist switched to the next song, Nick hit the back button and All I Need Is A Miracle started playing again (there was a reason he'd picked this song first). They listened to the first verse, and then Nick began to sing.

I didn't care if you hung around, I didn't care if you went away.

(Nick hummed along with the next verse, then sang,)

I could never make up my mind, I made it up as I went along.

And though I treated you like a child, I'm gonna miss you for the rest of my life.

All I need is a miracle. All I need is you.

All I need is a miracle. All I need is you.

All I need is a miracle. All I need is you.

Judy took a deep breath as her anger evaporated. Of course, Nick would play her a sappy love song. And the fact that Nick played (and sang) it even though it reminded him of their fight, and the misery they both felt afterwards, squeezed her heart. She knew this was his way of saying he recognized his mistake and that he would never take her for granted again. As a wave of warmth seeped deep into her core, a blinding smile flashed across her face, even as moisture pooled at the corner of her eyes.

I never had any time, and I never had any call.

But I went out of my way just to hurt you, the one I shouldn't hurt at all.

I thought I was being cool. Yeah, I thought I was being strong.

But it's always the same old story, you never know what you've got till it's gone.

If I ever catch up with you, I'm gonna love you for the rest of your life.

Judy wiped at her eyes. Nick wasn't going to forget the past because of the lessons he learned—painful lessons he never intended to repeat.

All I need is a miracle. All I need is you.

All I need is a miracle. All I need is you.

All I need is a miracle. All I need is you.

Turning to his honeybun as the music continued playing, Nick thought about what Judy meant to him, and then said, "You're my miracle, Judy, and I don't need you to be anyone but yourself." With a sincere smile, he added, "Letting you go was the biggest mistake of my life, but now that I've caught up to you, I'm going to spend the rest of your life loving you." With a smirk, he growled softly, "So prepare yourself." The previous conversation was completely forgotten as Nick focused on his honeybun—his girlfriend and mate—along with the wonderful memories he intended to make with her.

Judy chuckled weakly at his joke, but couldn't hold in the happy tears as they spilled down her cheeks. He'd been through so much, but just like Finn had said, Nick didn't need her to be anyone else. Just herself. Gripping her heart, she choked on a sob, then said, "Ni-ick, you're doing it again. You're killing me softly and now I'm crying again!"

Nick chuckled, saying, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. Your secret of having a soft, gooey, marshmallowy center is safe with me."

Judy laughed and wiped her eyes again. Nick always knew what to say to make her laugh. As the song ended and the next one came on (Smile by Uncle Kracker), Judy's ears drooped as she realized it was another love song. "Nick! Are you playing all loves songs for me!"

Nick glanced over with a smug grin and said, "Did I create a playlist of all the sappy love songs that remind me of you? Yes, absolutely, 100 percent."

Judy laughed, but wasn't put out. The fact he'd picked songs about her simply meant she'd be constantly on his mind. That idea released more fluffy butterflies in her stomach and warmed her clear through. But then when he started singing as the next verse started, her jaw dropped as the tears started pooling again.

Completely unaware, nothing can compare to where you send me.

Let's me know that it's okay, yeah, it's okay.

In the moments when my good times start to fade—

You make me smile like the sun, fall out of bed, sing like a bird, dizzy in my head,

spin like a record, crazy on a Sunday night, you make me dance like a fool,

forget how to breath, shine like gold, buzz like a bee,

Just the thought of you can drive me wild,

Oh, you make me smile.

"Ni-ick!" Judy cried out, interrupting him. Slugging him in the arm, she demanded, "No singing! My heart can't take it!"

Nick chuckled but complied. As the song continued, Judy grabbed one of her ears and started petting the end as she stared out her window. "It's bad enough just listening to the words, but hearing you sing them, too, I just want to melt before jumping in your lap and kissing you like crazy."

Nick's ears perked up while he studied her bashful expression, and then he let his eyes wander down her tight body as he remembered last night. Licking his lips, he turned back to the road and had to slam on the brakes as the light had turned red and the mid-sized tan sedan in front of him had stopped (the small Astro van had switched lanes earlier).

"Nick!" Judy exclaimed as they were both slammed into their seatbelts with the jeep stopping a mere 3 feet behind the vehicle in front of them.

"Sorry," Nick muttered, "I was a bit distracted."

Judy glared at him. "Eyes on the road, Slick."

Nick gave a sheepish smile, then turned back to the road and waited for the light to change.

Judy listened as the song finished, but then as the next song started (Love in the First Degree by Alabama), she said, "If you're going to make me listen to all these sappy love songs, then we should at least talk about something."

Nick glanced briefly at her, then returned his eyes to road to say, "Okay, let's talk about your suppressants, then." Glancing over again and meeting her stunned gaze, he asked, "You've seriously never been on suppressants?"

"Oh," she murmured. "Is that what Finn needed to talk to you about?"

Nick nodded, saying, "One of the things."

Taking a deep breath, she answered, "My heats were so mild in high school I didn't even know I had them. They just made me antsy, restless, like I couldn't sit still. So, I threw myself into some form of physical activity—running, hiking, aerobic exercise, pulling weeds or harvesting the crops." She made a face remembering the last two. "Weeds and crops were my least favorite, but I helped out where I could."

Glancing briefly at Nick, then back down at her lap, Judy continued her explanation. "With most rabbits, high school is the worst as we're trying to deal with our changing hormones, but that doesn't mean we'll go out and jump the first rabbit we can get alone. The suppressants are mainly to curb our hormones so we can focus on our schoolwork and our chores at home."

Petting her ear again, Judy continued, "This is especially true when the doe or buck has a love interest. Since our hormones can easily sidetrack our thinking, the suppressants help us to concentrate. This means that rabbits who find it difficult to keep their wandering thoughts and paws to a minimum can actually get their work done without all the distracting thoughts and impulses."

Running a paw down her ear, she said, "Once we mature, then the suppressants are only needed when we go in heat, and again, it's mainly to keep the antsy feeling and distracting thoughts at bay, though if we do have a mate or love interest, a higher dose will be needed."

Nick nodded, then stated, "But you've never needed them—until now."

Judy blushed, but nodded as she continued playing with the end of her ear. "Since I went my whole life with never having to deal with high levels of my hormones, I'm struggling to control them when we're . . ." she paused a moment (and Nick took note as her delicious scent just got a little stronger), ". . . when we're together." With eyes widening, she turned to him and said, "But that doesn't mean I would need them all the time. Just when . . . I'm in heat . . . and we have to deal with other mammals." Her blush could clearly be seen in her ears and through the short fur of her cheeks and nose. For the first time in her life, she wondered how she was going to get through a workday when her next heat hit.

Nick grinned at her and licked his nose. Her scent told him exactly what she was thinking about and made him realize he might have to buy some suppressants himself. The only time he had ever needed them before was in the winter, during fox mating season, back when he was working with several of Big's vixens at the same time. He hadn't been interested in any of them and certainly never felt the need to chase their tails, but being surrounded by their increased scents (especially since several of them were interested in him), he became hyper-aware of them and it left him distracted. But all he needed was a low dose to allow him to continue ignoring them and their advances. Their frustration at his lack of interest always amused him, since he had made it clear he wasn't looking for some hot tail.

Turning his attention back to the road as his phone switched to Somebody by Bryan Adams, he licked his nose again and asked, "So we'll need to stop at the pharmacy on the way home and pick you up a bottle?"

Judy looked down in her lap and pressed her fingers together. "Well, I'm not sure which kind I'll need." Nick glanced sharply at her, and she continued, "Between my littermates, I've never needed suppressants, my sister Janelle has only ever needed a mild dose, even in high school, while our sister Janette has always needed a slightly higher dose." With a shrug, she added, "There's also several different brands, so figuring out which one works best for me could be problematic."

Nick suddenly felt nervous while thinking of Judy smelling even more delicious than last night. As much as he loved her scent and looked forward to what it promised, it was still too early to indulge in such delectable, intense, mind-numbing activities. "How problematic?"

"Well, since I've never been on them before, it could take several days for the medication to build up in my system, and that's if we found the right kind at the right dosage."

Nick's nervousness turned to dread as he considered how it might be once she went into heat. Spending days with her intoxicating scent driving him savage on his bunny (not that she wouldn't enjoy his attentions immensely), didn't sit well with him. Being out of control with her wasn't something he wanted—not until they were married, at least, and he was sure she could handle him. Taking a deep breath, with her scent teasing him already, he knew getting his own suppressants would be imperative. And maybe a slightly higher dose.

"So, what you're really telling me then, is that I don't need to worry so much about marrying you before your next birthday, but making sure I have that ring on your finger before your next heat."

Judy's ears turned candy-apple red while she continued fiddling with her fingers. Looking up from her lap, she gave Nick an apologetic smile and replied, "Yeah, I guess that about sums it up."

Nick gave a heavy sigh while running one paw down his muzzle (the other one was currently gripping the steering wheel—tightly). "And when exactly is your next heat?" Although foxes only had one long season, he knew rabbits gave birth year-round—which meant they went into heat year-round.

Judy took a deep breath this time and said, "In four weeks. My cycles have always been on the long side of what's normal for a rabbit and comes around about every 6 weeks." Raising her paw, Judy nibbled on her thumb claw while wondering what her next heat would be like now that Nick was in her life. Once they were married, there wouldn't be a need to worry so much about her suppressants. But then again, in four weeks she was supposed to be back at work. Would the chief give her a few extra days for them to get used to their relationship? Her next heat will probably hit her pretty hard and without knowing which suppressants would be effective, she doubted she'd be able to focus on her job if she had to return to work.

Nick breathed a slight sigh of relief as this gave him some breathing room. He still wanted to get the ring as soon as possible, but he didn't think it would be easy. "That should give me some time to find a jeweler willing to work with a fox."

Judy perked up. "What do you mean?"

Nick glanced at her with a look of exasperation. "Judy, I'm a fox and most jewelers don't trust us walking into their stores. If I came in with a wad of cash and bought something off the shelf, I can think of several that would deal with me, but I want something special for you—which will be tricky. It's not uncommon for a fox to special order something, pay the full price plus an added fee the store charges for no other reason than the shop owner can, then be handed a cheap knock-off of what was ordered."

Judy's ears drooped. "So, you might not be able to get one?"

Nick's ears perked up with him replying, "I didn't say that. I just said it could be tricky, but you forget—I know everyone."

Judy laughed and tried to put her worries aside. If Nick said he could get the ring, then she'd trust him to get it. With a smile on her face, the rest of the ride home went smoothly. With their light chatter and infectious laughter filling the jeep, it kept the sappy love songs as mere background noise (though Judy did make note of the different songs that reminded Nick of her). Each song had meaning and kept her heart warm the whole way home.


WingedKatt again. Nick and Judy continue to draw closer to each and will draw even closer in the next chapter. We'll learn a bit about what a plushy means to a rabbit and Nick and Judy will have a worrisome conversation that will lead to some Wildehopps fluff.

Chapter 44: Plushies will post on Dec. 28, so look forward to it. As always, I'd love to hear from you. Have a great weekend and a Merry Christmas.