A/N: I know I have not updated in a long time, but I didn't think anyone was still reading it. It's great that you are and I will be updating more often. Not a whole because I'm almost six months pregnant so it's getting hectic, but it's worth it! I'm going to be talking about 'Sateda' in this chapter. I saw the episode and had an idea. Well hope you all still like this.

Disclaimer: Nope I still don't own anyone or thing from SGA

Chapter Sixteen

"Hey Jess how you feeling?" John asked as she sat down next to him in the sparring room. She wore her up and had on a pair of loose pants with a bra top. He would admit she was beautiful although after carefully evaluation of his feelings he realized that he wanted her more as a friend than anything else.

"I'm good thanks." Jessica said. It had been almost three weeks since she had come back. Of course everyone knew about her mother, but they never said anything directly to her. She and Ronon were getting closer, but since he returned from his home planet he had been very distant from her. She wonder what he went through being back knowing he was the only survivor. It had to be rough for him." Where's Ronon at he's normally here before we are?"

"Excited about him kicking your ass again?" John asked curious as to how far her and Ronon were

"No, just worried about him since he came back." she confessed

"Yeah I know how you feel. He's like family to me." John said somberly

"He does grow on you after awhile." she said as the doors swooished open and the object of their conversation walked in.

"Hey you're late." John said

"Yeah normally you're the one telling us we're late." Jessica said as she gave him a smile.

Ronon arched an eye brow at John and gave Jessica a mischievous look just right before he advanced on her and without any warning pulled her to him as his lips connected with hers. Just as quickly he let her go and turned around to get ready to spar with John. He would save Jessica till last.

"Well, just as long as you don't kiss me I'm ready when you are." John said as he tried to hide his smile of amusement at Jessica's deer caught in headlights expression.

Jessica watched as Ronon and John spared. The whole time she was thinking what had come over him to make him kiss her.

'Col. Sheppard I need to see you in Dr. Weir's office now.' Col. Caldwell's voice came over his ear piece.

Sighing John touched the ear piece" I'm on my way." he said as he tried to catch his breath

"Go, get'em John." Jessica teased as she came out of her stupor.

"You two remember there's no lock on this door." John said as he walked out.

"Why did you kiss me?" Jessica asked the moment they were alone

Ronon just shrugged as he got ready for their sparing match

"Don't shut me out." she said as she remained sitting down where she had been.

"It was the only way to get you not to open your mouth." he said"Com on give me your best shot"

"You must have relived some pretty harsh memories." she said still not moving. She wanted him to open up to her.

"It doesn't matter it's over now." he said nonchalantly as he walked over to where she sat

"But it still bothers you." she said as she gracefully got to her feet and began to circle him. Like a tigris does her prey. She thought.

"No, it doesn't." he blew her off as he watched her circle him. It was kind of turning him on, but he didn't want to talk about his memories from Sateda. It still hurt.

"Yes, it does." she argued" When I went back home my mom died." she paused waiting for him to say something" It still hurts to know that all this time I was feeling sorry for myself and she was dieing." a tear fell down her cheek as she stopped behind Ronon.

"It wasn't your fault." he said as he turned around to face her. He saw her tears now and it hit him like a physical blow

"I know, but I keep thinking what if I had went home earlier." she confessed as her eyes met his" What happened to your people wasn't your fault either."

"I know, but it's like you said I keep thinking 'what if." he told her as he remembered his love from home." I saw the woman I loved die right in front of me. A village I went to after being taken by the wraith was culled because I was there."

"Don't you see Ronon it was the wraith." she tried to reason with him as her tears still fell. She could feel his pain and it hurt her to see him hurting so bad.

"It still doesn't stop the pain." he said as he gently touched her face to wipe the tears off her cheeks.

"I've been just going through the motions, but I haven't felt alive in weeks. It hurts to see someone you love die and know there was not a damn thing you could to stop it." she confessed

Ronon didn't say a word he just slowly bent his head down to hers waiting for her to say something, but when she didn't he kissed her. He tasted her tears as he deepened the kiss. He knew how she felt because he hadn't felt alive since the wraith took him. Now being in her arms he felt alive. He pulled her tightly against him so that she could feel his growing need for her. He took a step forward forcing her to step back until her back hit the wall. Her tiny arms wrapped around his neck as she pressed herself against his body. Heat flooded through her body as she felt a need for like non other. He hands roamed over her body as they explored areas covered and not. She was smooth and smelled great. It was intoxicating. She was intoxicating. He lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He laid her down on the floor as he began to kiss her neck. Sensations were flooding her body everywhere his lips touched. A soft sound from the doorway stopped the heated exchange of comfort. Ronon's head lifted up with a murderous glare in the door's direction. There stood John and Teyla.

"I thought I told you two that these doors didn't lock." John teased" Unless that's a new fighting... Owe." Teyla smacked his arm cause a pain to jolt through it.

"Um.. I'll see you guys later." Jessica said as Ronon helped her up to her feet.

"I'll go tell her about the up coming mission." Teyla said as she followed after Jessica

"Ronon you're like family to me and Jessica is too." John said" Just don't break her heart it's been broken enough. I should know I've broken it the most."

"I can't explain it, but she makes me feel like there's something worth fighting for. When I'm in a life threatening situation I fight so hard to come back to her." Ronon didn't know why he was confessing this to John, but it felt right.

"Are you saying you're falling in love with her?" John asked curiously

"No." he answered quickly then thought about it" I, No, I'm not capable of loving anyone else not after watching one woman I loved die. I can't do that again." he said as he left the room

John stood there for a second before he too left the room.