A/N: I wasn't sure about this chapter, frankly I still have my doubts. But anyways, you guys deserved an update, and what an update! 9.5k words which I hope you guys enjoy. Special thanks to my gorgeous friend Eva (GlindaLovesShoes) who wrote an incredible scene for this chapter! If it wasn't for her, I'm pretty sure I would've never updated so please, thank her! Thank you, Eva! You saved my life! Also, thanks to Melis who made sure this chapter wasn't 'too extra' as I had feared. Wish I could show you all her hilarious commentary, but alas, I can't. Also, a belated birthday gift to the crazies Karla and Limary! We're meeting Lana in 19 days and we still can't believe it!

Warnings: Even though I know you guys won't complain about, this is quite smutty! Also a lot of things happen in this chapter (a lot more would've happened if I'd posted the whole thing) so, just a heads up!

But most importantly, enjoy!


|Chapter 10|

|Catharsis- Part One|

It's not that he regrets it, he doesn't, it's just the fact that Robin feels an unmistaken emptiness whenever Marian's lips grazes his.

He used to blame it on the fact that it's been years since they last kissed each other, but still, every time they kiss, hold hands, or simply go on dates, he ends up disappointed by the end of the day. And it's not even that the sex is bad, it isn't, sex with Marian is one of the most satisfying things he's had in his entire existence, but it isn't worth it, not when afterwards, when Marian's head rests on his chest as she sleeps peacefully, he feels the unmistaken numbness and emptiness taking over his body again.

It's been three months of this, and even though he's grateful for that second chance with Marian, he feels as if he's lacking on other things.

He barely sees Regina now.

For some reason she decided to take more workload, stays at her firm until late at night instead of going out for drinks with friends, and he understands it, knows that they're heading towards their late twenties and obviously growing up. But still, whenever he asks her out for dinner, or simply to the cinema to watch that 'movie I know you've been dying to see' he only gets an "I'm too tired" in reply and the silhouette of her as she heads towards her room.

But tonight he's intent on changing that, this deteriorating friendship between them. Tonight Ruby had invited them all for dinner at her place, and even though he's going sans Marian —the two decided to slow things off, after all, ever since she returned they've both been spending every day together— he's pretty excited to receive some time off of this relationship, to simply hang out with friends.

Robin wears a royal blue button up and some dark washed jeans topped with a black leather jacket. He takes a look for the umpteenth time in the mirror, fixes his hair and then shakes his head, is not as if he's trying to impress someone… right? Robin chuckles darkly and takes one last look at himself. He heads to the kitchen, picks up his car keys and phone, noticing he has a text from Regina, and finds himself frowning immediately.

Still doing paperwork, unfortunately I'm going to be a little late. Tell Ruby I'll see her in a bit.

He sighs, types back an 'Okay, we'll see you later' and heads out.

It's almost 9pm when Regina arrives, and even though the last two hours have been filled with laughter and conversations, Robin cannot help but feel extremely giddy and happy at seeing her a few yards away from him. Ruby lets out a cheer at seeing Regina there (a cheer that if Robin hadn't caught himself, he would've let out also) and immediately hugs her.

Robin takes his time to ogle her. She's wearing a blue cocktail dress and a black coat, her hair wavy and face makeup less. She looks gorgeous tonight, more than ever, he thinks. And maybe it's the fact that he hasn't seen her, really seen her, in forever. Or maybe it's the fact that she's just naturally beautif— Her eyes meet his, amongst countless of people, and Robin feels his stomach doing flops. Regina offers him a small smile, eyes devoid of emotion and he excuses himself from the conversation he's having with Will and Tuck, and slips himself into the den, bringing her a glass of wine.

"For you, m'lady," Robin says, a small smile on his face and Regina nods in gratefulness, taking the glass from his hands.

"So, what did I miss?" Regina asks, scanning her eyes around the room.

"Nothing much, Ruby has some news to tell us, but she's been waiting for you so."

"Oh, that's interesting?" She chuckles and at that moment Ruby decides to call them.

"Hello all! Thank you for coming tonight! Since we're all here together Victor and I would like to share some incredible news with all of you." Ruby motions for Victor to move towards her side, and he goes willingly, a small smile on his face as he begins to blush.

Robin stiffens at the sight of the man, because even though the man had apologized for his drunken behavior a few months ago, his words had cut too deep and even though he found it in his heart to forgive him and tell him "Don't worry about it" the words still ring in his head every day.

"Guys, Victor and I are getting married!"

A couple of cheers and catcalling rings through the house, growing in frequency when Victor and Ruby kissed in front of family and friends.

"Well, that was unexpected," Regina mentions on a laugh.

"I know, thought them to be sampling every man and woman on earth before doing this."

"Yeah, but I'm happy for them," Regina offers with a smile, looking at the engaged couple and offering Ruby an excited clap when she looks her way.

"So, drinks?" Robin offers with a shrug.

"I don't really feel like drinking tonight," Regina mutters.

"Come on Regina, I've missed you these past few months, we don't even have to go out for drinks, we can go out for dessert or even stop by that little bakery you love so much. Please, just, for old times sake," Robin all but pouts at her, giving her his best puppy dogs' eyes.

"You're so full of shit," she chuckles, shakes her head and simply stares straight ahead.

Three months ago those same eyes would've turn her to putty, but today, today she doesn't feel the urge to kiss him, today she only feels the dull pull on her heartstrings, getting duller and duller with every passing day.

It still hurts, the betrayal still hurts, but she's a master at getting over things quickly, and she did. Even though the insufferable John Little keeps asking her weekly about it, keeps eyeing her from across the room with a knowing look. Weekly, he keeps telling her she should tell him of her conversation with Mal. Truth is, she is considering moving back to New York for a little bit, needing some time away from her best friend, and John Little had seen through the lie, her "I miss my family" her "I want to build a better future for me" all part of a façade, hiding something from him.

She never told him the true reason, and yet he looks at her, at them, as if he knows.

Because John has seen.

He's seen the way Regina looks another way whenever Marian, his buddy's old and now new girlfriend, wraps her arms around Robin. Or the small flinch whenever Robin mentions Marian's name.

Regina spends less time with them, more time at work, or at the gym, and slowly, John Little put the pieces together. And when he caught her talking on the phone with her friend Malloreen, telling her that she's considering moving back, John had stepped in, a questioning and sad look on his face.

He looks at her that way again. Begging her with his eyes to talk to Robin, explain her feelings, anything. But she had told John that night months ago how she could feel her walls building up, her sadness slowly dissipating, and nothing but comfortable silence inside her little shell. She'll kill herself before she ruins what Robin and she have —even though that thing has been ruined for the last three months.

And still John ogles her every move, him nursing a drink and pretending to laugh at something Will says at his side, but he still watches her and Robin.

She needs to get away from this place, from John's pointed look, from Victor and Ruby's untamed happiness, and even though she's not crazy about spending time with Robin, she has missed him too the past three months.

And even though she's been ignoring him these past few months, she also feels the need of spending that night with him, for old times sake.

"Okay."

• • •

Regina's nursing her whiskey as she eyes the man in front of her. Her idiotic best friend with his shit eating grin mixing some sort of thing in two glasses. It takes her back, to their first kiss, to that night when they were young and idiots, and her upper lip twitches in remembrance of how the night had ended.

Disastrous, just like they will end up. Regina knows this, has made peace with it, decided that if they go back to it, to sex, she'll do it for the fun of it, the primal need of it, just like it was supposed to be from the beginning. She clears her throat and her thoughts, crosses her legs and leans forward, resting on her elbows on the kitchen island.

"So, how are things with Marian?" She asks, eyes not meeting his.

"I don't know. We're taking things slow and yet it feels as if we're going a thousand miles per second. So we decided to take a break—"

"Another one?"

"Yes, at least until we're both sure of where we're going with this, although I'm sure it's heading nowhere."

"Well aren't you the optimistic one."

"You know it. Anyways, enough about Marian, how about you? I barely see you now." Robin sighs, pushes his fingers through his hair before he leans down on top of the kitchen island, his fingers covering hers atop it. "I've missed you," he mutters for the umpteenth time that night and Regina finds herself pulling her hands away from his hold, chuckling wholeheartedly at his hurtful look.

"Don't get all cheesy on me Robin Locksley."

And even though it pains her a little (a tiny bit) Regina's grateful that his smirk only causes her to smirk in return and warmth to pull low on her belly, a warmth that had nothing to do with emotional attraction, but a mere physical one.

• • •

They're in the kitchen one minute, then the next they're falling on top of the couch, a mess of limbs and sweat.

He's missed her so fucking much, and so has she, because even in their drunken stupor she's pulling him towards her over and over again, legs hooked around his hips as she rolls against him.

Robin groans against her neck, sucking the skin there as he pushes his fingertips under the hem of her dress, bringing it up towards her waist. Her meaty thighs are in display and ready to be worshipped by his groping hands, and he gropes, pulls, presses himself tighter against her, the bulge of his jeans now coming in direct contact with that part of her that's undoubtedly drenched.

"Yes!" She cries out the moment his hands find her pebbled nipples through layers of clothing, pulling and twisting, a beautiful agony, pleasure filling her to the brim. Robin pushes her dress off her in an instant, growling at the matching black lace covering her lithe body. In an instant he's assaulting her neck again, growling and muttering how hot she is, how he's gonna make her come multiple times with his mouth and then his cock. Regina only growls at the prospect, her insides trembling and drenching in anticipation as she rolls her hips against his again.

And God, his hands skim down to her narrow waist, holds her in place as he rolls his hips under her, jean covered cock rubbing deliciously against her. Robin sighs under her, stops his movements and caresses her cheek.

But she needs more of this, more friction, more action, more fucking. So she cups him, her fingers softly traveling along the length of him through layers of clothing, and he groans against her chest now.

"You're fucking taking too long. Off!" She mewls as she lifts herself off him, bites her lower lip and just watches him through heavy lidded eyes as he does as he's told.

She salivates at his form, eyes growing darker by the second as his jeans come off and then so does his boxers, his cock springing free from it's confinement, standing proudly and twitching.

"Like what you see, m'lady?" He asks, more like slurs, but she understands quickly.

Wanting to pay him back, she stands in front of the couch, a bit woozy, her legs shaky with the pent up pleasure she has, and reaches behind her back to unhook her bra, throws it somewhere towards the coffee table before he has a chance to say anything. Then slowly, with a sly smile on her face, Regina hooks her fingers through the lace of her panties and pushes them down, letting them pool at her feet.

"Like what you see?"

Robin simply stares at her, eyes growing darker, breath growing heavier by the second and he sits up, line of sight directly at her lower abdomen and he caresses her hips, hands going to her backside, pulling, grabbing, as he stares at her.

"This is new," Robin whispers, tongue peeking out to lick his lower lip. His fingers move from her backside towards the front, over her recently waxed nether regions, a thin strip on top leading down to heaven, or heavenly hell. His fingers skim over her clit, moving further down until he finds scorching wet heat. "God, you're so wet," he groans, closing his eyes as he rests his forehead against her lower abdomen.

His middle finger enters her in a swift motion, Regina closing her eyes instantly as she bites her lower lip and prevents a moan from moving past her lips the moment a second finger joins in.

Regina pushes him down on the sofa, sits atop his lap, and smirks intently at his shocked expression. She runs her nails from his chest down to his pelvis, getting close but not too close to him. She repeats the motion again and Robin moans and closes his eyes, hips thrusting upwards in search for a touch, heat, anything that will alleviate this pressure, this sudden need he's feeling.

"I know what drives you crazy, Locksley," she mutters, her timbre lower than normal.

Robin simply smirks, eyes glassy in his inebriated state and he arches an eyebrow, truly curious with where she's going with this.

So he challenges her.

"Really?"

And if there's something Regina appreciates more than fucking him, is a challenge. So she gives him a wink before she wraps her hands around his neck.

"I know for a fact that if I do this," she presses her chest to his, her nipples perk against his warm skin, "your breath will get heavier. And if I do this," she slides her hand towards his, pulls them and presses them against her buttocks, making him grope her ass only to have her chuckle in delight at the twitching his cock makes under her, "your cock will get incredibly hard."

"Regina," he warns, he always did have a weak spot for her foulmouth during sex.

She merely chuckles, straightens up in front of him before she leans down and starts kissing his chest. He wishes it were his lips and then his chest, but they've made a deal an hour ago during their drunken conversation in the kitchen, and it's no kissing, because they just want to fuck and that's all.

So that's how they'd spent the night, not kissing on the lips.

Regina reaches down with her fingertips, nail softly scratching down his navel, she arrives at his length, his erection pressed snuggled between them, pressed against his lower belly and she lightly brings her finger down his head, down his veiny cock until they land on herself.

"Do you want me to touch my—"

"Yes!" He all but begs, groaning at the view of her manicured fingers circling her clit.

She stops though, instead brings her finger up his length until they land at the small slit at the top of his head. She circles it with her index finger, smiling devilishly at the drop of precum and spreading it around the now glistening head.

Regina twirls her palm around his head, giggling at the loud set of curses that leaves his lips only for them to turn into a feral growl when she twists her hand and pulls down on his length. Quickly, though, she stops and instead lowers herself onto the floor on her knees and rests her hands atop his thighs. Her palms move teasingly closer to his aching cock, before she retires them, settles on caressing the inside of his thighs.

Robin all but groans the moment Regina leans forward and drops a kiss on top of his crown, her hand moving down to hold his hips in place.

"Are you gonna suck me off?"

And it might not be classy, but it's genuine, and something about Robin speaking this way to her makes her feel cheeky. So instead of answering with words, she slowly closes her mouth over his crown, tongue twirling over the slit before she's sucking him in deeper, tongue now laying flat under his shaft as she pushes lower and lower until his head is hitting the back of her throat.

"Fuck," he growls somewhere over her head, and even though she's pinning him down to the couch, she can feel his jerks, him trembling underneath her, cock throbbing in her mouth and shit, this shouldn't be able to arouse her this much, but she can already feel her wetness increasing, a moan leaving her and reverberating around his cock as one hand closes around her hair and the other one searches for a breast.

"Look at me," he says, and her dark brown orbs meet his blue ones, and Regina smiles wickedly, even though his cock is four inches inside her mouth. She winks at him before she starts bobbing up and down, slowly, teasingly, never breaking eye contact, sucking on the way up, flickers her tongue on that spot where shaft meet the crown and his hips jerk forward, a loud shout leaving his lips as he holds her by the hair, prevents her from moving.

"You're not playing fair," he mutters, face scrunched up in pleasure as she chuckles around his cock and presses her tongue flat against the underside, hand twisting at the base of his cock as she looks at him amusedly. "Stop," he mutters when she adds a soft scrape of teeth to the equation. Even though he wants nothing more than to come in her mouth, Robin still feels that gentleman-ly strike on him, so instead he pulls at her head a little, forcing her to release him with a loud plop, cock now glistening with her spit, twitching and throbbing when Regina's hands twists and pulls against his base. She pulls all the way towards the head where she twists her wrist, palm firm against head before she pushes down on him again, another set of curses leaving his lips.

"What happened Locksley? Can't handle a simple blowjob?"

But she doesn't give him time to answer, instead she presses her tongue flatly against his head , flickers it firmly against the slit and Robin's hips jerk forward, a loud 'fuck!' moving past his parted lips.

"Okay. Now, condom!" Regina quickly scampers off his hips, leaving him panting and mouth parted as he looks over her perk butt as she makes her way towards the kitchen, hands quickly going inside her purse from where she takes a condom out.

Quickly she makes her way towards the living room again, a smirk playing upon her lips as she finds Robin stroking himself lazily, glassy eyes staring at her every tantalizing move. Soon she sits atop his lap, cock twitching deliciously in his hand and Regina merely pushes his hands away from himself, and rips the foil, throwing it towards the coffee table, and rolls the condom in place.

She has the knowledge that he's with Marian, and yet —as horrible as it sounds, that trills her, in her drunk state she bites her lip and feels empowered at the fact that even dating, Robin can't keep his hands off he— oh!

His fingers flicker over her bundle of nerves, traces her heat before he pinches her clit again, moaning as she spreads her legs for him before she settles down on his lap, legs on either side of his hips, and their eyes meet.

And with a wink, instead of a small kiss to his mouth, Regina sinks on him, pushing him to the hilt.

• • •

The sudden banging against the door pulls them from their sleep, Regina immediately lifting her head from his warm chest and with droopy eyes looks at the front door. Her mouth feels parched, her eyes heavy, and her neck stiff. She looks down at Robin, who's not fairing better, and the banging returns.

"Robin," the woman calls desperately, and it doesn't take more than a second before both Regina and Robin jump from the couch and searching for their discarded clothes scattered around the living room.

Guilt makes its way inside them, Robin swallowing hard as another knock rings around the room and he pulls up his pants, Regina pulls the blue dress over her form, both of them groaning at the raging headache.

But then they hear keys dangling, key lock turning and Marian walks in before either one of them have time to flee the living room.

She says something, something Regina can't quite comprehend because her eyes are focused entirely on the coffee table, where her bra and condom pocket lay. Then Robin is talking, calmly, and Regina's trying to come up with ways to hide the evidence of last night without Marian finding out.

It is one thing to enjoy having sex with her roommate, but it is another thing hurting another woman for it.

So she moves slowly, closer to the coffee table, her eyes never leaving Robin and Marian as she tries to reach for her bra on her side. But then Robin looks at her, and so does Marian, then Robin's gaze travel to where her hand was trying to reach, and his eyes grow as big as saucers.

And so does Marian's.


|Present|

"We need to talk."

Regina swallows hard, knowing this moment has been long overdue. It was time to stop avoiding him like an immature teenager and act like an adult for once. So she sighs and nods.

"I know," is all she whispers back, their eyes meeting in silent understanding.

Perhaps it is time to do this, perhaps it is time to rip off the band aid and deal with the open wounds they both have. Mal was right, she and Robin have a history together, moments they can't deny, can't forget —don't want to forget, but neither one of them can keep living in the past.

Not when everything revolves in herself or other people she loves getting hurt.

That's why she'd left London and moved to New York after all, to get over the impossible situation she found herself in back then, a situation she sadly found herself in now once again. Deep down Regina knows they can't go on like this, since it's not fair to either party involved. There is, after all, too much at stake for her.

She could not continue to be stuck between two men. This is not a movie, this is her real life! It's not fair to her, to him, and least of all to Daniel.

Oh God.

Daniel.

Her fiancé. The man she's going to marry in four freaking days in front of the altar, promising him her love, her trust, her undying loyalty... Her stomach clenches painfully at the thought that she'd already broken his trust, that she'd already been unfaithful to him by kissing her best-friend-slash-maid-of-honor.

Should she tell him, get clean before they say their wedding vows? Or should she not say anything, should she pretend it didn't happen, should she lie?

But what kind of relationship built on a fundament of lies, even if it is just a concealed kiss with her best friend, is supposed to last? It was a mistake to kiss Robin like this, she knew that, and if he hadn't stopped her, they would have done much, much worse. But he had —which she was glad for.

And yet, she can't help it but feel disappointed by it. Because she still wants his kisses, she still wants his touch, she still wants him. Deep inside she knows this. Which is exactly why this has to stop!

After all this time, she cannot blame herself to take one last bite off the forbidden fruit, no, not really.

But this had to stop now.

Right?

She needs to end this.

Right?

She slowly takes off her trench coat, hangs it onto the coat rack right beside the front door, right next to her purse. Robin wouldn't tell Daniel, he wouldn't ruin this for her, that much is clear.

But she needs time to think about everything, what is best for her and Daniel, not for him. Robin would take his flight home to London after the wedding was over, he'd go back to his life, his pub, his friends —which used to be hers, too, a long time ago. And once he left what would be left for her if she told Daniel about her slip —a slip that should never have happened, that could have been prevented in the first place if she'd managed to get over him, over them, in the first place.

What if Daniel couldn't forgive her, what if he called the wedding off? What would her friends think of her, her family, the guests...? Her life is here in New York, she would be left with nothing if everything went down and she couldn't risk that. Not like this, when every time she looked at him, she imagined them kissing. Not with him in her apartment, with his voice whispering comforting words in her ear, with his smell filling her over sensitive senses and his presence clouding her judgment. Not with the dreams, especially those dreams in which she lets go completely of everything that scares her. Those dreams in which she opens herself up to him, lets him love her, worship her, and she does the same. No. She can't think clearly with him here. Robin told her it would all be all right, but she knew it wouldn't.

Not like this anyway.

Once she reenters the living-room, she finds Robin still sitting there, the expression on his face not changed the least. Regina feels nervous, kind of uncomfortable in her own home, uncomfortable in Robin's presence, something she's never felt before. There is a piece of paper he's clenching in his hands, while his eyes meet hers.

"You were the one who wanted to talk," she says quietly, cutting through the silence in the room like a knife.

Robin licks his lips, obviously looking for the right words to say. Talking has always been easy for them, except when it came to topics such as feelings that concerned the other one. Those were shoved down to the deepest corner of their hearts, never really dealt with, never really gone. He could have asked her a thousand things, but instead, he starts with the to him maybe most important one.

"Do you love Daniel?" he asks straight out, his gaze watching her every move.

"Excuse me?" Regina gapes at him in surprise, trying to wrap her brain around the question, wondering what the hell Daniel had to do with all this. The answer was everything. "What kind of question is this?"

"The kind you can answer with a simple 'yes' or 'no'." Robin arches an eyebrow in challenge, or anger, she does not know.

And oh, now he decides to become a smartass.

"I'm marrying him in four days. Of course I love him." Her voice is a tad too high when she answers, her hands nervously fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. Somewhere in the back of her head she can hear Mal's voice loud and clear, but she decides to ignore it.

At least for now.

"The one has nothing to do with the other," he mumbles sighing, trying to keep his inner anger under control.

"Oh now you're the relationship expert? When was your last relationship that lasted longer than three months?" she snarls back, defensively crossing her arms in front of her chest. How dare he question her judgment. It's a low blow, she knows that much, but right now she is too hyped up, too angry with him to play fair.

Not when he's the reason she left London in the first place.

"Don't even go there, Regina! I'm not the one jumping into something I haven't really thought through."

"Now what is that supposed to mean?!" She wonders, her eyes confused, a bit angry maybe. How dare he question her love for Daniel and her decision to marry him!

Robin sighs, clearly having trouble to express what he wants to tell her. "You have known each other for eight months, Regina. All I'm saying is, that if you want to take more time to think about it, everyone will understand." His voice is genuine, understanding and honest, but her mouth opens in shock, her hands form into fists.

Perhaps he should have addressed this topic in another way.

"So after questioning the love for my fiancé, you now question my judgment? That's rich coming from you."

"Marriage is a big decision! You... You barely know him!"

Well, there is that. It is a desperate move, perhaps the last one he can take. He's known Regina for more than ten years, knows how important this whole concept of marriage is to her —a fact that makes his stomach turn when he thinks how Daniel is treating his best friend right now. He wanted to punch that asshole in the face, since he knew. He knew men like Daniel because before he met Regina, he'd been one. The slight difference between them was that after he met Regina, he'd changed. Daniel however treated her like a convenience, an object…

"I'm starting to wonder if I still know you, Robin Locksley. I haven't seen you in three years."

His eyes shoot her an agitated look, filled with hurt, with betrayal. "And whose fault is that?! You left London after John died, you were the one to leave and you were the one to call me to be your maid of honor at your fucking joke of a wedding."

"So now my wedding is a joke?!"

He sighs. No, of course this wedding isn't a joke. He wishes it were, but no, it's very, very real. "Regina..." Robin tries, his hand reaching out for her but before he can progress what is happening she takes a step back, searching for distance. It hurts him, but perhaps it's what she needs. "That kiss was…"

"Was a mistake! A mistake which I regret dearly. For a moment I got caught up in the past, Robin, but I'm not that person anymore. I have changed. I'm getting married." Oh can she please stop reminding him?! The kiss had been anything but a mistake. He'd felt it, and deep down he knows she must have felt it as well.

"No, you're still the same Regina I have met ten years ago. But well, when I think a little bit about it, perhaps you're right. You have changed. Because the Regina I know, my best friend, would never marry a man who leaves her alone to deal with everything four days before their wedding, not even telling her where he went."

"He's on a business trip!" She defends Daniel, raging with anger now. Does she really have to defend her fiancé from her best friend? She thought they were getting along just fine!

"Did he tell you that?" Robin shot back, the piece of paper in his hands now crumbled into tiny pieces.

Did he... Regina clenches her teeth, her brain working so hard she can't even think straight right now. No, Daniel hadn't told her where he went, but... he just said it was a business trip. He left for them at least every other week, telling her he wasn't able to cancel them. Daniel was a hard worker, he earned a lot of money so surely these trips and late nights at the office were justified, right?

Right?

He would never... Daniel wouldn't lie to her about that stuff, would he?

"What do you know?" Her voice isn't more than a whisper now. She turns her back on Robin, not trusting her face to stay in place. Instead, Regina walks over to the window, her eyes finding the busy streets of New York underneath her feet.

"I don't want to imply anything."

"It's a little too late for that, Robin." He sighs deeply and for some reason Regina gets the feeling he is close to giving up.

"Regina. All I'm saying is that I want you to think about this whole wedding thing. Ask yourself, do you really want this?"

She is glad she has turned her back on Robin for now, otherwise he would be seeing the tears which were welling up in her eyes because of the confusing situation she found herself in. It isn't easy when your brain and your heart engage in a fight neither one is able to win.

"I need you to leave," she says quietly, knowing his absence is the only thing that can help her right now.

"Excuse me?" Robin is taken aback at her sudden request, since it is the least thing he expected her to say. "Do you want me to go to a park, or…"

"No, I need you to leave this place, Robin. Go to a hotel or something, but you can't stay here anymore."

"You can't be serious, Regina." His mouth hangs open, his eyes wide with shock. How can she demand this of him?

"Do I look like I'm joking?" She yells, turning around with her face wrapped in anger to hide the other emotions she isn't willing to show him. "You want me to think about my wedding. You want me to make a decision and I can't do this with you here! So please. Leave!"

"Fine!" He yells back, his open betrayal now visible. "Fine, I'll leave you alone and go to a damn hotel or wherever. The place I should have gone to in the first place. But let me remind you of something. You wanted me here. You asked me to come! You cancelled my hotel reservations and wanted me to stay here with you. I have done everything you asked of me, but I'm tired to be at the receiving end of your choices, Regina. I'm your best friend, but I can only take as much."

It is only that when she hears the aggressive bang of the apartment door closing that she notices the wet streaks the tears have left on her cheeks and her shirt.

Fuck.

What is she supposed to do?

• • •

Robin wants to leave this God forsaken place, go to London and never come back.

And he will.

He knows he will, as soon as this wedding fiasco is over. As soon as he sees Regina say I do to that prick. God, how stupid, how awfully stupid has he been, to come here, to kiss her, to face his feelings, to get some closure. How! How can he get some closure when her heart beats for another one even though they kissed? How can he get some closure when every time he closes his eyes and dreams of her, he's met with the awful realization that she's not his to take care of, she's not his to love, she's not his… and will never be.

He needs to leave this place, this awful city of dreams and skyscrapers and taxi's and hurried people who live their life, have their own problems and still manage.

At that moment his phone goes off in his pocket, and he looks at the screen to see he has a text from Emma.

Regina called me. Where are you? I'll pick you up.

And even though he's pissed at Regina, awfully frustrated and disappointed with her actions, he's grateful she at least had the decency to get Emma to help him out.

• • •

"What happened?" Emma asks, from her place in her kitchen, giving him a pity filled look.

Thankfully Henry fell asleep as soon as they arrived at their place.

"We had a disagreement," Robin murmurs from his place on the dinning room.

"I think calling that a disagreement is quite too vague. I mean, she kicked you out."

"Well, that's Regina to you," Robin barks, sighing and regrets his choice of words immediately.

Emma had been nothing but kind in offering him a place to stay until this wedding bullshit is over, he shouldn't be treating her this way, he should be kissing her feet instead.

"I'm sorry, I'm just so overwhelmed with everything."

"Okay," Emma nods and shrugs, suddenly curious of the whole situation between Robin and Regina. "So, what went on between you and Regina back in London."

"I...We...How did you—" He stutters, not knowing how much Emma knows of their history. Not wanting to disrespect Regina's wishes—perhaps she hasn't told anyone about their past?

"A blind man can see you both have history."

Robin sighs, looks at his twiddling fingers and glances to the wall.

"What Regina and I had was… complicated."

"Tell me something I don't know."

Robin chuckles, then focuses on his cup of coffee, the only drink that reminds him of Regina, and God, will this ever end? Will he ever move on? Will he ever forget about her? Them? His feelings?

"Neal," Emma lets out on a sigh, her hand going to her neck, absentmindedly playing with the necklace there. At Robin's questioning look, Emma continues. "Henry's father, he loved me with all his heart. But I was young, immature, stupid, I preferred living my life rather than open myself up to love. Then when I finally did let him in, allowed myself to love him, and him me, he was taken from me, and then two weeks later I found out I was pregnant."

"Emma—"

"What I'm trying to say, Robin, is that every relationship, no matter what type, is complicated each in their own way. No one's had it easy, no one ever will, but Robin, love, no matter what type of love, is worth it. Worth the pain, worth the heartache, is worth everything."

"Regina and I—"

"Have a complicated past, a complicated relationship, yes, I know. But Robin, I also know that there's something special there, something that I've never seen before in my three years knowing Regina. When you arrived here, God, she was the happiest I'd ever seen her. And these past few days, it's a breath of fresh air! She smiles more often, she stands up to her mother and it's just, it's what Henry and I want for her."

"Regina and I are just friends, Emma. We love each other because we've known each other for over ten years."

"Robin—"

"She's marrying Daniel this weekend. She loves him, and that's all there is to it," Robin says, not in anger, not hurt, simply tired of the situation. For Emma's words remind him of Little John's, and the guilt that appeared that night appears this one too.

He knows how the story will end. He's accepted it a long time ago.

Emma's about to say something, about to reply to him, but instead she closes her mouth, and presses her lips into a tight smile. Then she nods, leaves her cup on the sink and with a good night she heads to her bedroom.

He appreciated the gesture, the knowledge that Regina's the happiest when she's with him. But some simple facts can't be ignored; She's marrying Daniel, he's leaving this place.

And yet, as he stares at the cup of coffee in his hands, he feels the glimmer of hope again.

He has a chance.

He has an opportunity to let her, and everyone, know about his feelings towards her… even though the words will come out of Daniel's mouth.

But still.

Daniel doesn't know her like Robin does.

He doesn't know how she got her lip scar.

He doesn't know how she'd downed beer boots in Germany.

He doesn't know how, at age twenty three, she'd worried she wasn't marriage material.

He simply doesn't know her.

The real her.

Regina Mills, the exchange student, his best friend.

So with that thought in mind, Robin grabs a napkin, a pen, and just pours his soul through words.

• • •

On Tuesday Regina wakes up to an empty apartment and no missed calls. She doesn't think about him, does everything in her power to distract her head.

But then night comes, and she's missing him, so, so much. But instead she texts Daniel, asks him if she can call him, but he doesn't answer until later that night, when she's sound asleep.

On Wednesday Emma invites her for lunch, a last get-together before she gets married. Regina agrees to go, as long as Robin isn't there —her coward side still can't confront him— and Emma agrees, amidst disappointed.

But now it's Thursday morning, she's a nervous wreck and there's no one in her apartment. Her mother isn't there, and although Regina's sure she'd only make her even more nervous, she just needs a little company, no matter who it is.

Daniel's flight has been delayed, and even though he'll still arrive on time, Regina can't help but feel anxious for tonight. What if he doesn't show up? What if his flight gets cancelled? What if he wasn't really at a work trip?

What then?

And she understands now.

The need for a maid of honor, the need to have someone, whoever it is, by her side every step of the way, drying her tears, calming her nerves, just taking away from her the anxiety that weddings provide.

So she texts him, just to see if he's okay.

But he seems to know just what she needs, and instead of ignoring her like she thought he would — after all, she wasn't that kind to him— he replies with an Everything will be okay, I'll see you tonight.

God, she really doesn't deserves him.

• • •

Robin triple checks his bowtie, to make sure it looks okay, and he, along with Emma and Henry, make their way out of Emma's apartment. She drives them to the hotel, and they walk through the lobby. Emma and Henry head off to where Mary Margaret is, and Robin merely looks around the lobby, trying to find her.

He heads into the ballroom, his eyes doing the same, but this time he just stands there, ultimately surprised by the amount of people in the room. Truth is he wasn't expecting there to be over two-hundredth people, especially on the rehearsal dinner (not rehearsal per-se), but apparently Cora and Daniel had other ideas, because he sees them animatedly talking to the guests, Regina nowhere to be seen.

For a minute he wants to go there, hand Daniel his vows in front of all these people and just watch him cower under him.

But he won't do it.

No, he'd much rather give him his vows in a quiet, secluded place, where he'd feel intimidated by Robin's presence. So instead he ignores the groom, and skims his sight over the room, still looking for the brunette that owns his soul, suddenly feeling the need to see her.

"She's upstairs."

A voice mutters on his left, and he turns around, visibly relaxing as Henry Mills offers him a small smile, before it turns into a frown. "Daniel arrived just a few minutes ago, he still hasn't asked for her," Henry whispers sadly, his eyes a storm of emotions.

And Robin feels his blood boil, fists his hands and walks towards where Daniel is.

"Robin"

He hears Regina's father call out his name, trying to get him to turn back and look for his daughter, but the anger is too much, there are so many things one can hold.

And instead Robin keeps walking towards Daniel. He's had enough of his selfish self.

Daniel visibly falters the moment he sees him.

"Daniel, a word please."

Robin turns to the guests, asking them without words to leave them alone, and they do so, walk away. From the corner of his eye he can see Cora eye him with an annoyed look, and Robin simply turns back to Daniel.

"Where's Regina?" Robin asks bitterly.

Realization dawns on Daniel and he looks around the room, trying to catch sight of Regina.

"I… I… don't know," Daniel stammers, eyes growing as Robin moves closer to him. "I just arrived—"

"From your business trip? Yes, nice tan by the way," Robin near growls, quickly glances around them to find no one watching the ordeal. "You may think you're bright, Daniel, you may think you can deceive people, but you can't deceive me."

Robin reaches inside his pocket and brings out his vows.

It's only a piece of paper with a few words, but still it hung heavily in his back pocket as he made his way to Daniel. He was convinced that this was a bad idea, that he shouldn't have offered to help this man that couldn't even come up with a perfect way to thank Regina for marrying him, but he did. He helped the man and himself in the process. He poured a bit of his heart out onto words and papers and shit, perhaps he shared too much, perhaps he opened the door he'd tried to keep closex ever since arriving here.

But it's the only thing he could come up with. He couldn't write the vows from Daniel's point of view, no, he instead wrote them from his, because the feelings she elicits in him, they're real, and reality, a nice dose of it, it's what this goddamn wedding needs, it's what Daniel needs.

And reality it is, because as soon as Daniel's eyes skim over the words, his posture changes, frowns, before a look of pure realization makes it's way into his features.

"You love her," Daniel lets out after a moment, crinkles the paper in his hand and just stares at him.

It was bound to happen, Daniel was going to find out sooner or later. Now that the cat is out of the hatch Robin can breathe a little better now, but still, that constant ache that Regina will never be his was ever present.

"If I didn't I wouldn't be doing half the shit I'm doing," Robin replies, venom dripping through every word. He's tired of all this, he just wants to get this over with, head off to his homeland and just forget that this ever happened.

Just one more day, he thinks.

"Does she?" Daniel can't even dare finish the question, his focus entirely on the words scattered across that paper, his wedding vows.

"Knows? Loves me? No Daniel, she chose you a long time ago," Robin lets out with a shrug as he crumbled inside, the accepting tone breaking his own heart. Because even though when he wrote those vows he felt hope surging in his heart, he now knows and accepts the truth. No matter what he says, no matter what he does, him and Regina are bound to end in nothing.

Just like Victor had said years ago.

After a moment Daniel nods and swallows hard.

"Thank you for doing this," he looks down again at the paper in his hands before looking at Robin.

"You better read that through and through and memorize it. I love Regina and I want her wedding to be perfect and if you do even the slightest mistake tomorrow, I swear to God I will do everything in my power to make your life miserable."

Daniel merely nods, but Robin can see the man is shaken, noses flaring. So Robin shakes his head, absolutely disgusted at Daniel's anger.

"You know what's the funny thing? That she has someone who would move heaven and earth just to see her smile for a minute, someone who loves her unconditionally. And yet it is you, the one who takes her for granted, who she decides to end up with. You don't deserve her—"

"What's going on here?" Cora near hisses, a forced smile on her face as she acknowledges the guests nearby before she makes her way towards them.

Robin moves away from Daniel and clears his throat, the anger still present in him. There's no use in spending another minute surrounded by them when he could be enjoying his last few hours with Regina.

"I was just handing Daniel something vital for tomorrow."

And with that Robin turns and walks towards Henry Mills, knowing that he should leave behind all negative, depressing thoughts. After all, he only has a few hours to enjoy Regina's company before he leaves this retched place.

Cora gives Daniel a confused look, her hands crossing in front of her chest and Daniel simply swallows hard.

"Are you okay?" Cora asks, her eyes skimming down to the rustled paper in his hand. "What is that?"

Daniel merely shakes his head and hands her the paper. "I thought he'd be the perfect man for the job, given the fact that he knows your daughter so well. I guess he knows her even better than me."

"What are you talking about?" Cora asks exasperatedly, rolling her eyes at the guilt ridden look on her son-in-law's face.

It's when she reads the rumpled paper, it's when she absorbs each and every word, it's only then that Cora's eyes grow as big as saucers and she looks up at Daniel.

"You asked him to write you your own vows?" She asks calmly.

And yet it's that calm, that aura of superiority about Cora that freaks Daniel.

"Yes. I couldn't, I tried to write them by myself a few weeks ago, but I just couldn't. Then he comes along, and they're friends, so naturally, I guess, it just came out of me."

Cora closes her eyes and swallows hard, pulls her lips into a tight smile before she asks. "I need you to answer a question and I need you to answer it truly."

Daniel nods, both hands going into his pockets as he tries to hide the fact that they're trembling.

Cora looks at him straight in the eyes as she folds up the piece of paper in her hands.

"Do you love my daughter?"

The question takes Daniel by surprise. It's a little too late to be asking those questions, isn't it? After all, their wedding will be in fifteen hours? Yet he answers her with the truth.

"I do. I love her."

"Then she must never find out about this. You go now and figure a way to make your vows work, but there's no way in hell you're using his."

• • •

Robin takes the elevator, impatiently taps his feet against the floor as he tries to make sense of the situation. Here he is, on his way to see Regina, the very cause of his heartbreak, the very cause of him wanting to live. The elevator dings and he's met with a small space, fancy, but really plain, and a stairwell that leads to a door. He goes there, takes a few deep breaths before he opens the door.

This will be the first time he sees her after days, the first time he sees her after pouring his soul out in paper—definitely feeling better (not bitter) about their situation.

He finds her by the balcony, empty gaze staring—but not really seeing— at the skyscrapers surrounding them, and Robin simply stares at her from afar, admiring the way her hands reaches for her hair, pushing strands behind her ear as she bites her lower lip and swallows. She looks gorgeous tonight, even more so, with her simple nude makeup and her short white dress as she rests against the balcony's modern railings.

"So, imagine my surprise when I enter the ballroom and the bride is nowhere to be found."

Regina turns abruptly, her eyes glassing instantly at the sight of him there, a few feet away from her on the 15th floor of this damn hotel.

"I thought you wouldn't come," Regina says, a small smile on her face as she bites her lower lip.

"Well, imagine the horror if the maid of honor didn't show up for rehearsal dinner." Robin arches an eyebrow, smirking all the while, before he beckons her closer with a nod of his head and a whispered c'mere.

Regina shakes her head, swallows down the lump in her throat and walks towards him.

"I'm sorry," she whispers, eyes glassy with emotions as she avoids his eyes, stares instead at his burgundy bowtie and finds herself chuckling at the sight. "You hate bowties," Regina sniffles, her hands immediately going to it, straightening it up.

"I do, but, it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make… only for you, and only for tonight."

Regina chuckles tearfully, shakes her head in reply and snakes her arms around his torso, immediately sighing against his chest as his arms do the same. But soon tears are welling up in her eyes, the knowledge that she's toxic and keeps pushing him (hurting him) away overpowering her and she bites back a sob.

"Hey," he pulls back to look down at her, " it's fine. We're okay."

And Regina nods in reply, insides warming at the softness his touch provides her on her cheek.

They stay that way for minutes, wrapped in each other's arms, swaying lightly, the only sound that of the city around them. She presses her cheek to his chest, inhaling his scent for the umpteenth time before she sighs and mutters.

"Get me out of here."

Robin shouldn't do it, not when a mere ten minutes before he was talking with Daniel, but still, he breaks their hug, caresses her cheek before reaching down to grab her hand in his.

And they flee.


You made it all the way down here! Thanks for reading and would like to read your thoughts!

Part two will be posted soon.

Signed,

Cruella.