A/N: This one is for Alec, and his unrequited love for Jace. Heavily inspired by "Dancing on My Own", covered by Callum Scott. Haven't heard it? Check it out, it is worth it :)


I walk back to the bar after leaving the men's room. Looking at the surrounding bodies, I don't my friend any longer. Where the hell did he go now? I think to myself. Trying to manuever around the other club-goers proves to be difficult. The lot of them are simply swaying or grinding to the common rave music. It is hard to deny the effect of the electronic beat, wanting to match with your heart. Sweat beads on my forehead from the warmth of so many others near me.

A quick flash of familiar curly blonde hair guides me towards the lounge area. I smile with relief. "Jace!" I scream stupidly. As if he would be able to hear me over the music. Further I push my way, desperately keeping my eye on the back of his head. The curtain moves aside just as he leaves my sight. The music volume is more reasonable here. My head was starting to ache.

Taking the curtain fabric in my hand, I hear a feminine giggle. My movement halts. I know that sound. I've had to hear it for the past two weeks. Peeking inside, my suspicions are confirmed. Jace is sitting on a couch with the tiny red-haired girl. They are simply talking, both enjoying whatever trivial topic that is on the table. But the sight of them in their own world effects me greatly.

I turn around when my heart pangs from the view. Unvoluntarily tears are pooling, but I hold them back. Slowly I return to the bar, not caring whom I bump into. Sitting in one of the chairs, I sigh heavily. The bartender comes over, "What can I get you?" My eyes roll up to see a guy that has wierd cat contact lenses. His mouth curves into a sly smile, but thins when I don't return it.

"Anything will do," my dull answer sends him away. I don't like to drink. The way the alcohol burns the back of my throat leaves me disgusted. A glass is placed beside my left hand. "Thanks."

His presence remains, so I meet his eyes again. "Brandy for you, blue eyes." Then he's called away by another clubber.

I pick up the tumbler, swirl the amber liquid, the ice hitting the glass is barely audible. "Brandy," I mumble with a small smile. Reminds me of when Jace and I stole Brandy from his fathers' cabinet in the seventh grade. We got so sick that night. Our parents were furious, the Herondales especially. Jace ended up on house arrest for the rest of that summer. It wasn't terrible. We used the hand radios we had from when we were five. The memory pushes a light laugh from me. I take a hesitant sip from the drink, trying not to cringe at the familar fire as I swallow.

Resting the glass back down, a drop falls down right next to it. The memory hasn't cured the brokeness I currently feel, the ache in my chest is spreading to my lungs and throat. Quickly I drown in the rest of the drink. The burn from the alcohol can't be differenciated from the heartache.

I have to bare this. I don't have a choice. Even if I do love him... The words have never left my lips before. I love him unlike a brother or a friend. I've imagined what it would feel like to have him wrap his arms around me in a long embrace instead of a short single-armed hug. That's what makes this so much harder. Seeing him treat that girl so differently than the others. Before, if I had walked in on him in the lounge area, he would have been fully physical with his then conquest. They never lasted more than four days.

That's why it hurts so much to see him being intimate with someone in such a way. I know he cares for her. Perhaps... he even loves her. My throat tightens at the thought.

Music dies, and the overhead lights come on. I look around the area, and people are starting to leave. "What the?" I mumble, and check my watch. Being lost in my thoughts, I hadn't realised that it was five in the morning.

"Time to go, blue," the bartender confirms, before walking off.

As I raise from my seat and turn towards the lounge, I see them. Their smiling faces make me pause again, and I turn back. I can't seem to find the courage to join them as they exit. I keep my back to them as they make their way along the floor. The phone in my back pocket vibrates.

Hey! Where are you? Jace's message breifly makes my heart jump, knowing that I cross his mind. Despite that, I can't make my legs move.

I text him back, "I went home hours ago. I was bored dancing on my own. He wouldn't understand the true meaning, or my tearing eyes.

Jace replies immediately. "HAHA sure, sure. Sorry, brother. You should step up your game! You're bound to find the right girl, too." Peering behind my shoulder, I watch as she wraps her arm around his waist, but Jace takes her hand to wrap in his own. That's an image that will haunt my dreams later on. I gather myself to leave the building, stepping outside to a new day.