When Facing Facts

Thanks for the Feedback: websurffer, winryrockbell2, Jane, Lawrence Hazeltoe, Sihhe Lord, Gozilla, Hailey, KuramasGirl123

Jane: Well, chances of a happy ending are increasing at the moment.

Lawrence Hazeltoe: The main reason I'm reluctant to have Roy completely give up hisplan to become Fuhreris because of episode 25. It's not just about being ambitious, fixing things soanother Ishbal couldn't happen againis his atonement. Your comments really helped, the two scenarios do call for different timeframes, that helped alot.

Hailey: Remember ch. 10, it's been taken care of. g>

KuramasGirl123: Not MPS.In most thefanfic stories I read featuring MPS the different personas represent different aspects of the person and that is not what Ed is doing. His personality isn't splintered, he's repressing the memories he can't deal with. The six-year-old persona is a retreat to a completely safe world, before the Rockbells died since I'm assuming that's the first time Ed had to deal with someone he knew dying but he assumes he's been separated from his loved ones because he's being punished. Roy sort of dealtwiththat byreintroducingEd to his mother's illness, introducing the idea that bad things justhappen and it's not Ed's fault, but Roy didn'twant to break Ed's safe-haven so hecame up with a scenario where Al andTrish could eventually come back some day. The twelve-year-old persona is someone who's dealt with quite a bit of harshness, but not with personal failure (A lot of this story comes from thinking abouta comment of Pinako's in Ch. 9 of the Manga: "And because he's so strong, I worry that when he finally does find an obstacle he can't overcome, will he be able to get back on his feet?"). Nina's deathhits too close to Al because he couldn't save either one of them so he creates an imaginary scenario where he realized what Tucker had done soon enough to save Nina. He's still not even coming close to dealing with the real problem, instead he fanastizes about having saved another person who looked at him as a big brother and who died.

Eboni: In addition to the difficulty of getting Ed to remember Roy's got other issues to deal with: guilt is a large part of his motivation. At current Ed actsbasically happy and he's willing to let Roy keep him safe, which resolves Roy's guilt. If Ed recovered more completely he'd loose his faith in Roy (In the Anime it seemed like Ed came to Central trusting that Roy would hand him the answers he was looking for and it wasn't until Nina's death that his relationship with Roy really turned adversarial on Ed's side.) and start insisting on running off to look for the Philosopher's Stone again, putting himself back in danger, which is not something Roy is comfortable with anymore.

Disclaimer: Characters and setting are the property of Hiromu Arakawa. I'm just borrowing them for a bit of non-profit angst.


Lieutenant Hawkeye escorted Lieutenant Ross into Colonel Mustang's office then, without waiting for an invitation she moved to the side of the room, halfway between Mustang's desk and Lieutenant Ross, and stood at parade rest. Lt. Colonel Hughes was sprawled casually across Roy's couch while the Colonel sat behind his desk with his elbows resting on its surface his hands clasped just below his chin as he stared impassively at Lieutenant Ross. Most people would have missed the worn look around Roy's eyes, but it worried Riza Hawkeye.

"Colonel Mustang, Sir," Ross saluted and remained stiffly at attention. "I apologize for disobeying your orders Sir, but I could not, in good conscious, continue lying to Edward. He trusts us to gate practically every interaction he has with the world, lying to him is an abuse of that trust."

"Maria, no one is questioning that you had Ed's best interest at heart," Hughes assured her. "But if you felt that way, why didn't you talk to us about it?"

"Lt. Colonel, I – I didn't wish to be removed from Edward's detail," Ross admitted.

"In other words; you don't trust that I have Edward's best interests at heart," Colonel Mustang interjected coldly. "Given that Edward's well-being is not a Military concern I am willing to overlook that you disregarded the orders of a superior officer and disseminated information you were ordered to keep confidential but I will ask upon what expertise did you decided that reminding Edward of his brother's death would be good for him?"

"Sir, you can't change the past by writing revisionist histories," Maria said. "You're encouraging Edward to forget years of his life with Alphonse and replacing those years with stories where the adults in his life didn't fail him so badly; where you kept him sheltered instead of forcing him to grow up so quickly. You can't undo what you already did to him by lying to him."

Roy stood up and walked around his desk to confront Maria. She continued staring directly forward. "Did it ever occur to you that there might be a reason for your orders? That Pinako Rockbell, who has much more of a right and a reason to distrust me, withdrew her objections to leaving Edward in my custody?" he demanded darkly as he stalked around her. "You can't force Edward to remember Lieutenant; his mind won't let him face it. Thanks to you he wakes up screaming his brother's name every night. He screams himself hoarse and he can't remember why."

Maria's military posture broke, for the first time she met Roy's eyes. "I'm sorry sir; I only meant – I'm sorry," she said with tears in her eyes.

Hughes got up and patted her on the shoulder. "We know. You wanted Edward to get better, but the fact of the matter is he might never get completely better. We're trying to make him happy, let him feel safe." Hughes escorted her out of the office.

"She has a point," Riza said as the door closed behind the other pair.

"She's lucky I didn't fry her for that stunt," Roy stated.

"I don't believe we are doing Edward any favors by trying to protect him from the memory of every bad thing that has happened in his life," Riza continued. "Nina Tucker, for example. Edward did deal with her death when he was twelve."

"He shouldn't have had to," Roy replied.

"No, but he did it. If we continue to protect him from the things he could handle before how will he ever reach a stage where he can hope to face Alphonse's loss."

"He shouldn't have had to deal with Tucker," Roy insisted stubbornly. When Riza started to argue he raised a hand to silence her. "Shou Tucker was an idiot to think that no one would know what he'd done. Basque Gran wasn't interested in a human-speaking chimera; he was interested in grafting animal attributes onto his soldiers to make them better killing machines. Only human transmutation is a taboo, you can't just order someone to do it. But Tucker had done it once, Gran trusted that he'd do it again eventually." Roy stared straight into Riza's eyes. "Gran knew because it was obvious to any sufficiently talented Alchemist willing to think the unthinkable, after all a chimera is nothing more than an amalgamation of the animals that make it up; to create one with human attributes one must include a human in the mix. I had Hughes look into Mrs. Tucker's disappearance almost a year before Ed arrived in Centeral, but if either of Hughes or myself tried to raise questions about Gran's pet project we could have kissed our careers goodbye right there. So I placed Edward and Alphonse in that house and trusted that Edward would also realize what Tucker had done and that he was brash enough to force the issue into the open where the Military couldn't turn a blind eye to it. After all it wouldn't compromise Edward's goals if his lack of discretion kept him from ever being prompted past Major. I wasn't doing him any real harm. It didn't occur to me that Edward would be too focused on his exam and still too damn naive to realize the truth about what Tucker had done."

"Sir, did you know Tucker was a danger to his daughter?" Riza asked.

"No! God no," Roy exclaimed. "Even Gran wouldn't want another psychotic on his staff. Hughes checked him out before I sent Edward there, we concluded that he wouldn't be a danger to Edward or Alphonse based on his interactions with his daughter. I had no idea he would turn on her next, but regardless of my obviously mistaken beliefs about the sort of monster Shou Tucker was I still placed two children in the home of a man whom I knew to be a murder. I used and manipulated them from the day I first met them until the day I got Alphonse killed and destroyed Ed."

Riza frowned then began her rebuttal carefully. "Colonel, I have been considering this matter for some time, the only reason we are having this discussion is due to Edward and Alphonse's ages. We all freely chose to join the Military, furthermore we all willingly follow you, knowing that you are attempting a coup; it is understood and accepted that there is a high degree of risk associated with the choices we made. The question is if Al and Ed were old enough to appreciate those risks and make their decisions accordingly. If you go but the letter of the State's laws they were not, but in my experience age restrictions are based on rules of thumb. Beyond a certain age most people are assumed to have reached a certain maturity level, in truth some people mature much faster while others only get older and never mature at all."

"I was eighteen when I became a State Alchemist and I had no clue what I was getting into myself into. I had no business putting a twelve-year-old into that situation," Roy stated.

Riza sighed in frustration. "Roy, the situation was not the same. You never ordered them to kill anyone."

"So I'm somewhat less of a bastard than Basque Gran, wonderful." Roy said sardonically. "Do you remember the night Nina Tucker died? You told me Edward was thinking like a child. Regardless of his talents and abilities I knew he wasn't old enough and all I did was tell him to grow up."

"Alphonse didn't die when he was eleven!" Riza exclaimed. "You know you didn't have them followed just because Edward tends to leave things out of his reports. If they had disappeared in that first year you would have had every available person looking for them within the hour. Don't try to tell me otherwise because I know better! But after four years they'd proven that they were capable of taking care of themselves under most circumstances, so we didn't panic immediately. Honestly Roy, do you think Al wouldn't have been killed if he had been seventeen instead of fifteen? Do you think Edward would have been able to deal with his brother's death if it had happened when he was eighteen?"

"Are you saying I shouldn't be taking responsibility for Edward?" Roy asked dangerously.

The look Riza gave him said she was insulted Roy had even thought that. "I am suggesting that it would be healthier for both of you if you would allow yourself to take care of him simply because you care about him rather than because you are trying to atone for your guilty conscious."