I understand how late this installment is (and I can't spell that word...) but I have a good reason. G.C.S.E's . Hitting with full force. I have bearly enough time to read my e-mails and finish coursework. But, I did try to get this updated. Take Me Away might be updated soon, but I'm not sure. please enjoy, and R &R! Cause I love reviews. :D


Rose was asleep. Very happily, drowsily, rapturously asleep. The warmth of her quilt stole her up, and her toes curled as she sighed her contentment. Consciousness slowly dawned on her, and she recognised the familiar blaring screech of the alarm clock by her head. Her head lifted, strands of wheat gold hair getting in her face. She had to stop the noise! Her hand lunged out, aiming originally for the alarm clock surface. If she pressed that wonderful button she could snooze for the next ten minutes. She grinned at the thought, but her hand did not reach the 'Snooze' button. With a clatter, she dislodged something from the surface of her bedside table. The curious object tumbled onto the floor with a decidedly loud thump. Rose winced. What had she knocked off?

Wiping her mouth of the back of her hand, she parted her curtain of hair and struggled with her coverlet. As luxurious as it was, it had a tendency to want to strangle her if it thought she was trying to get out of bed. She eventually emerged, and hauled the offending material off her body, allowing her to sit up. She glanced warily to the alarm clock, its wailing still echoing through her head. She leant over the mattress, placing her hand firmly on the other side of the bed so she didn't pitch forwards, and shut the damn thing off. Not before noticing the surprising heat radiating from the mattress beneath her palm.

Tentatively she lifted her hand, and looked down at her bed, suspiciously. The slight indent of something, someone, on her bed made her blink in surprise. Who had-

Wait… There was only herself and the Doctor on the ship. No one else could have gotten in. She looked once again at the impression on the bed. The person had been heavier than herself, tall too. She glanced at the door. It was shut… She had left it open last night. Heat crept up her face, and suddenly she was too warm. Her skin tingled and delicious shivers brushed her skin. Had the Doctor…? She rearranged herself, pulling her legs from beneath her and dropped her feet down by the side of her bed. Something cold and smooth brushed her toes, and she gasped, her feet automatically pulling away from the ground. Slowly, she peered over the side of the bed to see...

A pair of harmless glasses, thick rimmed with black plastic. She breathed out. The Doctor had been in her room. Somehow that thought calmed her, and she reached to pick them up. The perspex lenses gleamed in the dim light, and she rubbed them on her tank pyjama top. The white material gradually cleaned the lenses, and they shone a little better. Pushing her hair behind her shoulders she regarded the glasses, thinking hard. Did that mean the Doctor had wandered into her room, seen her sleeping and decided…? What? To get into bed with her? She grinned sheepishly. That sounded quite dirty when put like that. But that's what he had done. She pondered for a moment longer, then a thought came to her mind. Carefully she bent forwards and buried her head in her pillow above the indent, and inhaled. The well known scent of soap, sweat, some kind of after shave she presumed, and the underlying smell of the unknown made her mind reel. She smirked without realising. The Doctor had definitely lain next to her last night. She knew his smell. She found it so reassuring it immediately made her smile. All the tension melted away from her body. She rubbed her bare arm, surprised to feel goose bumps along her skin, the fine hairs raised.

Doctor.

She blushed, wondering how she could bring this up at breakfast… Should she say anything? Would it be awkward? She finally decided not to mention it to him, unless he mentioned it first, to save him from any… er… embarrassment.

Suddenly, her eyes snapped to her diary next to the clock. He wouldn't… Would he?

Her mind raced. She opened the inconspicuous black book, just lifting the lid with her fingertips as it rested on the table. Her name 'Rose Tyler' was sprawled across the front page along with a few doodles of her in plaits, then a very intense drawing of the Doctor in his old form. She wasn't good at drawing, but she wasn't bad either, and she thought she had captured his ears rather well. She had done it mostly from memory, but that hadn't been hard. She had memorised his face long ago… She swallowed. Had he seen it? It wasn't very flattering now that she looked at it. Oh God. Did he think she disliked his looks? She feverishly picked the book up and flicked to the latest entry;

Dear Diary – Wait. That sounds a bit… pathetic. Scrub that last bit.

Dear… Reader? Well who's going to read this, except me? Oh never mind…

Okay, I'll just dive in. What a day. To say the least it was bloody scary. How can I put this…?

I nearly lost him. I really thought back there that he had left, and he… he wouldn't come find me. I thought… When she had said he had fallen… Never mind what I thought. It's nothing. He can regenerate; he's not in any real danger. Is he? It's not that fact that I might never get home, even though that scares me so much! Never seeing Mum… Oh God. But it's not quite that… It was knowing I would never see him again. I need him. Not like that. Still… I'm human, but not like that. I had to know I would see him, hear his voice, feel his hand take mine. I don't think I could get by with out his cheeky grin, no matter how many times I want to hit him when he begins smirking at me when I'm sulking. My Doctor. What would I do without him? …It's so confusing…

I know he wouldn't abandon me… But… If he died- No! Never think like that. Ever. I won't ever happen. I wont let it. He's too import- He's too… I wont let him go. Not where I can't follow him.

I think I might… No. I can't. It'll pass.

I'm rambling now… What if HE finds this? How will I explain-

Alright… I had to stop writing there; he was asking me if I wanted to go get some chips. If he saw this… Well, it wouldn't be good, let's just say. Actually I could do with some chips now… Hang on a bit.

Okay, NOW I'm back. If there's grease on the pages it's just my chips… Mmmm, these are gorgeous. They're proper chips. Whatever Mickey says about laying off them, I don't think I could ever do it. Right, where was I? Oh yeah, well, I don't now what happened down on that asteroid. I just know I lost contact with the Doctor, for some reason. He fell… Things weren't going smoothly, what with the Ood trying to kill us all, trapped like rats in the control room. And that face… Furious, evil, talking to us. To me. I heard it… Such hate… I scared me. More than anything I had ever seen before. Because I knew who it was. And I knew what it could do to us.

It said I was going to die in battle… Soon. I'm going to die? But it couldn't have been true. It was lying to me. The Doctor said… But what if he was wrong?

I can't keep writing this stuff. It creeps me out… I have to get some sleep.

This is Rose Tyler, signin' out. Xxx

Rose exhaled loudly. If he found this…well, there was no incriminating evidence against her, she supposed. She was safe. But if he had read the other entries…

Uh-oh…

Rose had written some… confusing entries, directly after she had seen the Doctor regenerate. That period of time had been challenging for her. Her Doctor had changed; she hoped he would still be the same man, beneath the layers of new skin, bone and muscle. At that moment, when his whole body shook and he doubled over she hadn't understood. She remembered tears coming to her eyes as she saw he was in pain. A strange feeling flashed through her troubled mind, taunting her, beginning to make sense, then baffling her completely. The feeling over came her every time she saw him, growing stronger and stronger over the last few months. It had begun… When? As soon as he had smiled at her? No, that wasn't right, because she distinctly remembered a tightening in her stomach while they were dancing… A flicker in her pulse that warmed her… Months ago. Almost a year now. She remembered the flashing lights of the TARDIS, blue tinged shadows and the silhouette of the Doctor in front of her. Smiling down on her, so close, she could have leaned up and brushed her lips against his. She hadn't wanted to then, but now she thought about it, if put in the same position… She would. He had dipped with her, the hairs of the back of her neck prickling as she felt his hands on her back, lifting her up, keeping her safe. Her hair had brushed the ground, and she had leant her head back, mouth smiling in pure joy, and then that curious feeling rippled through her. It lasted maybe a second, but it left her legs feeling numb. She had stumbled some time after, and Jack had been there to catch her this time, his arms surrounding her. But he never ignited the same twinge of heat. No, something warmer than hot attraction. She'd felt that before. This was… Crueller. Harsher. It left her feeling hurt and confused yet special.

Rose shook her head, her straw coloured locks bouncing off her shoulders a little. Those feelings, whatever they were, couldn't get in the way of their friendship. He obviously didn't feel the same, and what would happen if she blurted them out. If it was just a crush, then she'd look like a fool. If it was something…deeper, the Doctor could send her home. His words 'I don't do domestic' reverberated in her head, and she squeezed her eyes shut, tears pressing the back of her eyes. How could she bear it if he left her? After something like that? No, she dared not risk it. Even though he made her experience strange, unknown, frightening, yet exhilarating emotions, she mustn't allow them to get in the way. She wouldn't lose him again.

He made her feel safe. Protected. Wanted. Appreciated. But there was always that unknown gap, something untouchable about him that puzzled Rose. She could never look him in the eye, have him look directly back at her, and ask him what it was. She never dared. If it was too painful for the Doctor to mention, the gap would grow, separating them eventually. If he hadn't noticed the distance and shrugged it off, that would be so much worse. His smile, his eyes, his thoughts were as precious to her as oxygen. To be separated from them… She shuddered. Like oxygen, she needed him.

Was she taking him for granted too?

She stared at the wall, the feeling of warmth for the Doctor growing as she pictured his face in her mind. This emotion, this suspicious sensation that distracted her when she looked at him, couldn't be…

She looked over at the clock, and saw the display read 8:39. She got up gingerly, breaking her trail of thought, like tracing a hand through smoke, and padded across the room. There was a plain door on the right side of her room, leading onto the bathroom next to her own. She had found having an en suite bathroom most agreeable. She stared bleary eyed at her reflection, wincing as she discovered an odd spot newly formed. She glared at herself in the mirror. She always looked so young without a healthy covering of make-up. She opened the cabinet above her head, and glimpsed the many bottles and tubes of mascara, concealer and lip-gloss. She didn't want to smother her face in that yet, her skin needed to breathe. She shut the cabinet with a sharp snap, and bit her lip, fiddling with the pair of glasses in her hand.

She giggled a little when she slipped them onto the bridge of her nose and over her eyes. The world blurred horribly, and she could only just make out her outline in the mirror in front of her, her eyes frames by dark squares. She pulled them off again, amused. She half-heartedly combed her hair with her hand, but gave up after a while. The blonde tats were making her scalp ache. As if on cue, her stomach groaned, and she looked down at it, giving it an experimental poke. She wondered if it would gurgle if she prodded it, but it didn't. She walked to the door, still twirling the glasses in her hand. She made for the door of her room, and without noticing, bit the end of an arm, lost in thought. She often saw the Doctor do this, and as soon as she realised what she was doing, she lifted it from her mouth and folded them up.

Slipping the glasses into the pocket of her overly large pyjama bottoms, she made her way to the kitchen.

Rogue thoughts tumbled around her head, turning back to the evening before. Running through the TARDIS' doors to find him standing there… That smile tugging at his mouth, his eyes wide, and shining. There were tears in his eyes last night… She didn't know what to say. So she didn't say anything. She just embraced him. She could almost feel his arms crushing her to him, lifting her from the ground. Safe. Safer than she'd ever been. Resting her head on his shoulder, breathing in his scent, her cheek against his neck. Feeling him squeeze her tight as he did the same. She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to recapture that feeling. That wave of affection and warmth that surrounded her Doctor.

She opened her eyes. It wasn't like that between them. It could never be like that.

She strolled down the humming corridors, her bare feet feeling the metal grating over the floor as it bit her feet gently. Nibbled it more like, Rose smirked. The TARDIS was becoming increasingly friendly with her as time drew on. A few months ago she had difficulty reaching the control room, and when she had asked the Doctor about it, he had grinned and chuckled. She could almost hear that throaty laugh, rumbling somewhere deep inside the old Doctor's chest. Yes, she missed the other Doctor. She couldn't deny it. She had asked him whether or not the TARDIS hated her, joking at the time, and he had replied the TARDIS needed to 'adjust' to her. Rose had stared at the ship with suspicion, and eyed the Doctor carefully.

'Are you tellin' me that the TARDIS is… jealous? Is that about right?' When the Doctor had grinned wider, Rose began to giggle herself and glanced up at the ceiling. The TARDIS had been jealous of her! She had pressed the Doctor for more information, even stepping in front of him to stop him from ambling off at one point. He towered over her, but she turned her face up, her stubborn streak kicking in.

'Doctor?' He had frowned at her and crossed his arms, his lips turned down in a scowl, but his eyes danced. She had been incredibly aware in that moment how close he was, his worn leather jacket brushing her thigh until it tickled. She graciously stepped back, but threw an arm out as he passed.

He smothered a snigger, and turned to her again.

'Yeah, I suppose when you put it like that it sounds funny, but honestly, it is something like that. She's gotten used to having me all to herself I suppose… She doesn't dislike you.' He had added, seeing the look in Rose's eyes. That had been months and months ago, and now the TARDIS seemed to be sharing.

Rose could certainly find her way around the ship now anyway, after days of just 'exploring', (she had found a garden in the depths of the TARDIS the other day, and before that a whole room filled with what looked like old artefacts), and as she neared the kitchen door, she slowed. She heard… whistling... coming from the open doorway, and she approached with caution. The Doctor didn't whistle.

Sure enough, as she looked into the large, oversized kitchen, she caught sight of her brown-eyed Doctor lounging in a chair by the circular table, apparently spreading marmalade on his toast. Rose breathed out. Marmalade. Why hadn't she thought of it before? He always whistled when he spread marmalade. She smiled shyly as she shuffled into the room, noting he was wearing his full pinstriped suit to the breakfast table, as usual, while she always walked in wearing whatever she had been sleeping in. She didn't mind and neither did he, so the fact went unnoticed most days. The Doctor never changed his attire either, and when Rose jokingly asked whether or not he slept in his suit, he just smiled broadly, that almost flirtatious glint in his eyes, smothered in good natured humour.

Without looking up, he said, a little too loudly;

'Oh, hallo, Rose. Thought you'd be up ages ago.' She stared at him, affection growing as she saw the look of intense concentration on his face as he flavoured his toast. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he worked, and Rose followed the action with her gaze. There was a smear of marmalade in the corner of his mouth…

Stop looking at his lips – Answer him! Her mind prompted, and Rose snapped her eyes away, wondering if he had noticed…

'Yeah, mornin' Doctor. I wus jus'…' She paused. Thinking of how attracted I am to you? '… showerin'.' She lied, hoping he didn't suspect-

His eyes left his toast and instantly travelled to her hair.

'Then why,' He looked directly at her face. There was no hiding from that steely cool gaze. 'Is your hair dry?' He wrinkled his nose. ' And unusually greasy?' He looked at her, puzzled, that mischievous smile twisting the corners of his mouth. He licked his thin fingers one at a time, watching her.

Her hands immediately flew to her hair. It was clean.

She eyed the Doctor again, and saw beneath the seriousness in his face, he was laughing at her.

'Oi! Your hair could do with a comb, Marmalade Boy.' She walked over to him, striding across the panelled floor, and made to mock hit him. She reached the table, her hand stretched to ruffle his hair, something she knew he hated.

He grinned, something flashing in his eyes. She knew he couldn't resist a challenge.

'Aw, well, I wouldn't say that, I quite like my hair this time around.' He lifted the rather blunt marmalade covered knife and waved it close to her belly.

'And one step further, you'll be covered in marmalade, Miss Tyler.' He smirked at her outraged expression, and inched the implement closer to her white tank top.

'Doctor, I'm warnin' you-'

The Doctor, conducting the knife as he said each syllable; cut her short;

'Ah, ah, ah, Rose. Think of the large, orange, sticky stain!' He teased, watching her every move.

'Now I have you at my mercy, I think you'd better tell me what you were doing.' He grinned mercilessly at her, his eyebrows quirking.

'Doctor, it's nothin' I jus'-'

'Got lost again?' Supplied the Doctor, his smile stretching. 'I thought the TARDIS and yourself had made some kind of pact?' He shook his head. 'Back to wandering the corridors for hours on end again, are we? Shame.'

'No, I wus,' Rose raised her voice above the Doctor, her mind thinking furiously for anything she could say.

'I wus' thinkin' about… things…' She mumbled, and her eyes left his for a second. That was all it took. The Doctor stood, the marmalade blade forgotten, still in his right hand. Rose looked away again and swallowed. When she looked back, the Doctor had moved closer, so close she was looking directly at his newly shaved neck. She could see each individual pore, the raw skin exposed above the folds of his shirt. He had cut himself shaving… Like he had rushed. She almost reached a hand up and smoothed the tender skin with her palm, but she resisted. Just.

'Rose…?' He said quietly, his hand brushing her chin so she looked up to him. His fingers were slightly sticky with rogue marmalade, and she could smell that well-known, tangy, citrus flavour. She locked eyes with his, and saw his concern, shadowing… Guilt? Why would he be guilty? He looked down on her, eyes blinking occasionally, boring into her. Suddenly, an intense need to hold him rushed through her, but she defied it. Yet the longing to curl into his arms would not go away. What was she thinking?

'Rose.' More insistent this time, and his brow lowered, and he pursed his lips. Rose fought the urge to look down at them, and simply stared at her Doctor. She swallowed and began shaking; very tiny vibrations, but the Doctor noticed them.

'Rose, what's happened?' All worry and fear filled his voice, and he reached to take her hand. It was cold but she immediately weaved her fingers with his own.

'Rose, you can tell me.' Gentler this time, not so authoritive, and his eyes softened. She felt his fingers stroke the back of her hand. Her skin prickled again, and her belly tightened. She knew she couldn't lie to him. He had noticed something was different. She sighed, her shoulders slumped, and she slipped her hand inside the pocket of her pyjama pants. The Doctor also glanced down, confused. As Rose fumbled in her pocket, the waistline slid ever so slightly, and the edge of her underwear became visible. The Doctor stared, then shifted uncomfortably. He should not be thinking like that…

Finally, Rose pulled something from her pocket, something glassy and thick rimmed. The Doctor recognised his glasses, realised where he had left them, and his gaze shot to Rose's face. What did she think of him? His mouth was dry. How could he explain-?

Rose's eyes looked questioning up at the Doctor, hope, the tiniest glimpse of hope flaring in her irises; brown, like his. He saw it, and braced himself. Did that hope in her eyes mean…? He couldn't… Even if she wanted him to… They couldn't- He was imagining things.

Oh Rose…

The marmalade knife fell through the Doctor's lifeless fingers as he gazed speechless at Rose. It clanged onto the ground; little flecks of orange peel littering the floor, but neither glanced down to it.


To my wonderful, loyal reviewers;

LarielRomenie: Are you sure it isn't possible? Good. Cause this fanfiction may just blow your head off, lol. There'll be more fluff soon to come. This fic has been mentioned in one of the Tennant episodes. Cookies to anyone who can guess which one. Dedicated to you!

Starlite1: Thanks! It's always nice to be squeed at. ;)

KatmuEllon: This fic is going to be about 15 -20 chapters long (it depends) and it's going to be a episode long fic, so there's loads of places where this thing will go, believe me. I've not gotten started.

Doc: Glad to oblige, but I was having a bit of trouble uploading this one. G.C.S.E's and all that. I've finished the other chapters, so they're ready to load up in a few days though. I wont abondon this fic. I know! Season 2 - I cried my eyes out.

Saiyamar: Thank you!

leox5000: You want to be my beta! I'm so honoured (no one has ever asked me that before). Want to beta my next chapter? Just e-mail me. I'd love a beta. I understand completely about the coursework (I should be doing Maths and Art too. And Englsih. Shh... Don't tell my parents.)Good to know you've finished Frankenstein (never read it - any good?).

one of the riddles: Cheers!

MYBIGBLUEBOX: Hey there! I thought you'd forgotten me, lol. Nice to see you drop a review in. Don't worry about it. Just happy you reviewed at all. hugs

Please read and review. It makes me so happy. I mean it, it wonderful! I check my MSN and there -bing- is a Review Alert! And I squee as I open it! Then dance. I always dance. Don't I everybody? Family:nods See? Please?