AN: There is not an apology on the planet I could say to forgive a five year hiatus. It was never my intention not to come back to this story but time is a funny thing. I got stuck writing this chapter, I knew what I wanted to happen but couldn't get the words to follow. One month turned to two turned to a year and so on. But here it is...finally. If there is one thing I learned from this experience it's that never again will I post a story that I haven't finished. As a reader I have felt the pain of following a story only for it to never be completed and I want to apologize to every reader who I made feel that way.

AN2: In an unrelated note, a few weeks ago I posted a Ruby/Belle one shot I wrote like four years ago during the five minutes I was into OUAT in case anyone is interested in that you can check it out in my profile.

AN3: Chapter Title is "She" by Louie Says


"Oh God. why did I agree to this?" Claire groaned as she and Alice pulled up to the bowling alley for their double date with JD and his girlfriend. "I fucking hate bowling."

"I hope your game is better than your attitude," Alice chided as they exited her truck. "You do realize that if we lose to these guys you'd probably never hear the end of it at work?"

Claire's blue eyes narrowed, her competitive nature taking over. "You're right. We have to win, no! Not just win, we have to completely kick their asses!"

"Where are we meeting them?" Alice asked, effectively distracting Claire from furthering her plans for domination.

The redhead quickly checked her phone, checking the message she received from JD a few minutes before they'd arrived. "They are already here, lane five. Let's go!" Grabbing her girlfriend's hand and dragging her towards the entrance.

Claire was reminded yet again how lucky she was to have Alice. Her girlfriend had effortlessly found a way to turn something she was dreading into something she was now excited for just by offering a different perspective. Claire was pretty certain that no matter the activity Alice could find a way to make her enjoy herself and that was really nice trait to have in a partner.

"What's the girlfriend's name?" Alice asked as she knelt down to tie the laces on her rented shoes.

"Um," Claire thought carefully, racking her brain for the answer. "I'm not sure, JD always refers to her as 'my woman'." She used air quotes and rolled her eyes in disgust. "Please don't ever refer to me that way Alice."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Alice responded as she returned to her feet, giving Claire a wink for good measure before taking her free hand as they made their way over to the lanes.

JD wasn't hard to spot, sitting by himself at the score stand in the fifth lane. He grinned widely when he spotted them approaching. "Ladies," he stood up to greet them. "Thanks for coming out tonight."

Claire looked around eagerly. "Where's the girlfriend?" She was very interested to meet the kind of woman who willingly put up with her annoying friend.

"Bathroom, she'll be back in a minute." His excitement at having her meet his girlfriend was evident. "I can't wait for you to meet her Claire. Rain is a hard ass like you, I'm sure you will like her."

Before Claire could respond she felt Alice's grip on her hand tighten to an almost painful extent. Turning her head she noticed Alice had paled, her skin nearly three shades lighter than normal which was saying something. She was about to ask Alice if she was ok but a voice behind her cut off the question before it left her lips.

"A hard ass? Really JD?" A woman with long dark hair arranged in a braid appeared next to the redhead's coworker distracting Claire's attention away from her girlfriend for the moment. This woman, Rain JD had called her, looked to be around their age, maybe a year or two older. She had nice tan skin and by the tank top she was wearing Claire could see the woman was clearly jacked, defined muscles showcasing what must have been a lot of years of working out. But the thing that stood out to Claire most was the woman's eyes. They were cold, betraying the polite smile on her face. "I don't know what JD has told you about me but I'm sure it was an exaggeration. I'm Rain," she held out her hand. "And you must be Claire, JD has told me a lot about you."

Claire returned the polite smile as she shook the other woman's hand. "I'm sure anything he has said about me is an exaggeration too."

Rain smirked at the response and then turned her attention to Alice. "You must be Alice?"

"Those are some excellent powers of deduction you have." Alice replied rudely, earning a glare from JD.

Rain didn't appear to be fazed by the remarks. "I hope your bowling is better than your manners Alice," she said before pulling her boyfriend, who gave the redhead a pleading look, back to the scorer table.

Claire looked at her girlfriend in shock. Never in the months she had known Alice had she seen her be rude to anyone the way she just was with Rain. Alice was still looking at the space where the other couple had stood just moments ago, the colour was still drained from her face and her eyes were hard in a way Claire wouldn't have thought possible if she wasn't seeing it with herself.

"Alice?" She tugged gently on the blonde's hand. "What was that? Are you okay?"

Alice shook her head slowly, as if coming out of a trance. "Hmm? Oh, uh, nothing. It was nothing. I'm fine. Come on, let's play." The blonde refused to look at her, and Claire was further disappointed when Alice let go of her hand as they moved to sit with the other couple.


The next hour passed without incident. JD easily returned to his good mood once the game started, facilitating most of the conversation within the group.

Alice barely said anything, responding only to questions directed at her and keeping her answers as brief as possible. Claire didn't know what to make of her girlfriend's behaviour. Alice was naturally reserved but her reluctance to add anything to the conversation was unusual. Something was up but Claire couldn't think of an excuse to get them alone so she could find out what was going on.

The redhead was pulled from her thoughts when she caught JD looking at her and subtly nodding his head toward Rain as he got up for his turn. She knew tonight was important to her friend, he had confided in her at work that she would be the first of his friends to meet Rain, and wanted the evening to go well.

"So Rain, what do you do for a living?" Claire cringed at her lame attempt to start a conversation but Rain seemed happy to answer.

"I run my own gym. It was a lot of work to get it off the ground but it's been going strong for two years now."

"Impressive," Alice spoke for the first time in a while. But Claire noted the hint of sarcasm in the response and hoped it was only noticeable to her.

"I always knew I wanted to run my own business," Rain continued as if Alice hadn't spoken. "I can't stand the idea of having to kiss ass to work your way up the ladder you know? Or even worse, to have no clue what you want to do with your life. I can't imagine what it must be like for some people, to have no motivation-"

"Oh yeah!" JD cheered. "Another spare!" He then smirked at Claire, "You're up Redfield."

Claire scowled as she glanced up at the scoreboard. JD was in first place, but there was still enough frames left for her to catch up. She picked up the purple ball, which had quickly become her favourite over the course of the game. She took a deep breath, focusing on the pins at the end of the lane, visualizing them falling over one by one before bringing her arm back and then swinging it forward, releasing the ball at exactly the right moment. Her eyes never left the ball as it rolled down the lane, and finally what felt like minutes but in reality was probably only ten seconds, it made contact and easily knocked over every pin.

Fist pumping the air at her success Claire turned around to find JD alone in the book. He was scowling at the scoreboard as she closed in on his lead. Claire looked around for their respective partners. "They went to get us drinks" JD replied to her unspoken question.

Claire berated herself for not thinking of that as an excuse to get Alice alone to ask her what was wrong. She turned to the concession stand where it was easy to spot the two women. She could see Rain talking to Alice but Alice's back was to Claire so she couldn't make out anything else. Her attention was brought back to JD as he spoke again.

"So, what do you think?"

"About what?" Claire asked, still staring at the back of Alice's head.

"About Rain of course!" He rolled his eyes at her cluelessness.

"Oh," Claire didn't really want to answer that. She couldn't put her finger on it but there was something about the woman she didn't like. JD was so open and carefree and Rain seemed so...harsh. Claire debated how to answer her friend's question, she had barely spent an hour with Rain and didn't feel like she was in the best position to judge. Instead she opted for a safe answer. "She seems very driven, I know it's not easy to run your own business."

JD grinned. "Yes she is very driven. I really like her Claire."

Claire smiled at her friend, "I'm glad you're happy JD. That's what matters."

It was then that Alice and Rain returned to their booth. Rain passed a beer to JD before taking a sip of her own. Alice handed Claire a soft drink with one hand while setting down a basket of nachos with the other. Claire grinned at the sight. Alice knew her so well, nachos were her favourite. Her grin faltered however when she noticed the frown on her girlfriend's face. And it wasn't just the frown, Alice's body language was like a bat signal to the redhead that something was very wrong. Alice sat in the booth as far away from the others as possible, her hands fidgeting in her lap and gaze locked on the television playing old music videos next to their scoreboard. Claire had never seen her so withdrawn before and she couldn't stand it. She was about to pull Alice away, determined to get to the bottom of whatever was bothering the blonde when Rain spoke.

"So Claire, tell me, how did you and Alice meet?"

"It's kind of a long story" she answered, eyes still locked on her girlfriend. It took all the will power she had to tear her eyes away to look at Rain. "I guess you could call it happenstance, we just always seemed to be in the same place at the same time." Claire turned the question back on her, not wanting to talk about her and Alice's relationship when the blonde was acting so distant. "How about you and JD? How did you meet?"

"I'm going to the washroom," Alice announced suddenly, standing quickly and walking off without waiting for a response.

Claire watched her go, wanting nothing more than to follow her. But with the way Alice had been acting all evening, maybe the blonde needed a moment to herself. Not wanting to appear rude, Claire turned back to the other couple.

"I hate to say it, but we met through a dating app." JD admitted and then went on to tell the entire story of how they started talking, their first meeting, and things they had in common. Claire tried to listen but it was damn near impossible as her thoughts and eyes kept straying to washroom door where the blonde had yet to emerge.

When he finally stopped talking, Claire almost jumped at her opportunity to escape. "I'll be back in a minute." Not waiting for a response she took off in search of her girlfriend, her gut instinct telling her to go check on the blonde. When she pushed open the bathroom door and found Alice standing at the sink, staring into the mirror Claire knew her instinct had been right. She watched Alice for a moment, but the other woman didn't move, her eyes burning into her own reflection.

"Alice," Claire called softly. "Are you alright?" Alice had been acting strange since they arrived and now Claire's previous concern had grown into full blown panic.

Alice's eyes darted to meet Claire's gaze in the mirror. It was several long moments before she finally answered. "No."

Claire quickly took the necessary steps so she was standing next to Alice, one hand rubbing her back soothingly. "Are you sick?"

The blonde let out a long, slow breath before replying. "Maybe. I'm sorry Claire but I think I need to go home." Claire searched her eyes, looking for any clues that would give her some insight into what was going on. And although Alice had very slowly been starting to let Claire in, the blonde still had some walls that she was not yet able to break through. Claire sighed when Alice didn't offer any further insight.

"Okay, I'll go tell JD and Rain that we're leaving."

"You don't have to Claire," Alice protested. "You can stay if you want. I know how much you wanted to beat JD."

Claire waved off the very notion of staying while her girlfriend wasn't ok. She took Alice's face in her hands, pressing their foreheads together. "I don't care about that. I care about you." Alice made eye contact for the first time since she'd entered the bathroom and Claire could see the smallest amount of relief on the blonde's face. "Now I'll meet you at the front when you're ready okay?" She waited for Alice to nod. She gave Alice's arm a squeeze in reassurance before exiting to tell the other couple their double date was being cut short.


The drive home was silent, Claire couldn't help but stare openly at her girlfriend. She'd never seen Alice like this and was at a complete loss on what to do. When Alice stopped the truck in front of Claire's apartment building instead of parking it her frown deepened.

"You're not coming up?"

Alice shook her head. "I think I need to go home."

"Are you sure? Because I don't mind taking care of you Alice." She desperately hoped Alice would change her mind and come inside with her.

Alice picked up her hand, holding it like it was the most fragile thing she'd ever held. "I'll be fine Claire, it's probably just one of those twenty four hour things."

She knew what Alice was trying to do but it did not reassure the redhead in any way. But what else could she do? She didn't want to force Alice into something she didn't want to do, but it was heartbreaking to see the other woman acting so...unlike herself and have no idea why. Claire sighed. "Okay, if you're sure?" She gave Alice another chance to change her mind.

"I'm sure," Alice paused. "I'm sorry for ruining our evening."

"Don't be, you didn't ruin anything" Claire squeezed her hand. "JD and Rain were very understanding. And honestly I'm a little relieved we got out of there." She cringed thinking about the awkward small talk she'd had to make with Rain. It wasn't nearly as comfortable a situation as when she had met LJ and Betty.

"Why?"

"I don't know" Claire replied with a shrug. "I know we only spent like an hour with her but something about Rain rubs me the wrong way. I just can't put my finger on it. Do you know what I mean?"

"Yes I do." Alice's words were firm and Claire wasn't surprised that Alice agreed. Her girlfriend had been anything but polite when meeting the other woman, but Claire didn't think now was a good time to ask her why. Not when she'd rather know what was bothering the blonde. And from the look on her girlfriend's face Claire was resigned, knowing she wasn't going to get any answers from Alice tonight.

"I will call you tomorrow to see how you're doing okay?" She waited for Alice to nod her understanding before sliding across the seat. Claire brushed aside the messy blonde hair and kissed her forehead gently. "Goodnight Alice. I...I hope you feel better." She'd almost told Alice she loved her but managed to hold it back. Claire wanted to tell her, but as much as she had got to know Alice in the past three months she couldn't be sure how the other woman would react to such a declaration. Their 'three month anniversary' had made it pretty clear to her though that while Alice cared for her deeply and was happy to have taken a chance on their relationship, she was not ready for the word love to be added to the situation yet. And so Claire kept her mouth shut, determined to wait until Alice was ready, but it was getting harder and harder to keep her feelings in check.

Claire was pleasantly surprised when Alice reached out and hugged her tightly for a moment. When she pulled back there was a hint of a smile, the first Claire had seen in hours. Alice didn't say anything but Claire could see the unspoken plea in her eyes, a plea for patience. She could do that. Nodding at the unspoken request and giving her one last smile Claire exited the truck. It was only with extreme reluctance that Claire headed inside, anticipating a restless nights sleep ahead of her.


"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" Alice swore repeatedly as she sped home. "This is not happening." She couldn't believe it, after all these years of trying to forget. "Seven billion fucking people in this world and we end up on a double date with Rain." The evening had been a nightmare. Alice could not even imagine a worse case scenario than the reality that had played out before her.

Rain, the woman who had broken her heart four years ago. Smashed it into oblivion and convinced Alice that love and relationships did not exist, at least not for Alice anyway.

Alice pulled into her driveway and darted into the house in search of Carlos. He knew everything that had transpired four years ago and therefore the only one she could turn to for advice. She found him sprawled out on the couch, flicking through the channels. Alice snatched the remote from his hands and turned the television off.

"Alright, it's not like I was watching something anyway." He said, pulling himself up into a seated position. "I didn't expect you home so soon.." he trailed off when he finally looked at his friend's face, immediately noticing her distress. Carlos sprung to his feet, laying a hand on her shoulder. "Alice, what's wrong? What happened?"

"She was there on the double date with Claire's coworker." Alice whispered, still shaken by the ghost of her past.

Carlos frowned. "Who?" As he studied her face the answer became clear. "Rain?" Alice nodded. "Claire's friend's girlfriend is Rain?" His mouth hung open in shock.

"Yeah."

He quickly pulled his sister down onto the couch. "Tell me what happened."

Alice shrugged. "Claire and I went to the bowling alley. Claire's never met her before so she didn't know anything about her. We get there and it's fucking Rain."

"And what did she do when she saw you?"

"She introduced herself as if she's never met me before." Alice could feel tears welling up but refused to let them fall. Instead she took a few deep breaths. "And I just let her. Just went along with it, pretended we didn't know each other. After an hour I couldn't stand it anymore so I told Claire I was sick and we left."

"You didn't tell Claire?"

Alice blinked back more tears as she looked at her brother, knowing the shame she felt was more than likely evident on her face. "I can't Carlos. I can't tell her."

It was bad enough to have seen Rain, but if she'd had to explain to Claire how they knew each other every bad memory and feeling from that time was sure to resurface and Alice couldn't put herself through that kind of pain.

Carlos hugged her and Alice held on for dear life. "What are you going to do?" He asked gently.

Reluctantly Alice pulled back from the embrace. "Go to bed and pretend this never happened? If I'm lucky I'll never have to see her again for as long as I live."

He gave her a sympathetic smile. "Well that's one idea."

Alice could tell what he was thinking, there wasn't much he could hide from her. "You think I should tell Claire."

"I think she would understand you better if you did, but I will understand if you don't want to." He knew better than anyone the devastation left by Rain on Alice and didn't want her to relieve it anymore than she did.

"Thanks Carlos," she stood up. "I'll be in my room. I have a lot to think about."

He nodded. "I love you Alice, I'll be here if you need anything."

Alice slowly made her way downstairs. Seeing Rain had been like a punch to the gut and Alice didn't know what to do. She had never expected to see her again, had hoped to never see her again, so she'd never planned for such a scenario. But if she had, tonight would not have been how she would have liked it to go. Alice was so angry, mostly at herself for going along with Rain's charade but she had no one to blame but herself. That was how their entire relationship had been. Alice doing whatever Rain wanted, even when it made her unhappy. And now, even years later, she had fallen into the trap again.

They had met during Alice's first week of college, Rain was a year older and had worked at a lot of the freshmen events. Alice was immediately smitten and pursued Rain unabashedly. The other girl refused her advances, saying she didn't want to date a freshman. But then one night Rain had shown up at Alice's dorm room and kissed her, the next day they were officially a couple. And Alice was happy, for a while at least. Looking back she was embarrassed to admit that in her youth and excitement at having her first adult relationship that she failed to notice all the red flags with Rain that she should have.

Rain would make subtle comments about Alice's choice in major or cast judgements at her choice in extra curricular activities. "What kind of job can you get with a history degree?" "I guess you could always teach karate."

Rain even dumped Alice for a week after she'd received a C on a midterm, stating she refused to date someone who couldn't even manage a B average. Alice, young and in love have been heart broken at the time and begged Rain to give her another chance. The older girl had made her wait a week and then made Alice promise to never let it happen again. At the time Alice just thought Ran was pushing her to be a better person, not purposely trying to bring her down.

Alice should have realized their relationship wasn't healthy when Rain would constantly threaten to dump her every time Alice made even the smallest mistakes. Instead Alice just kept trying to please her, doing anything and everything she thought would make Rain happy. She even ended up switching her major to business but nothing was ever good enough. She had tried everything, done everything for Rain but it never mattered. Alice had always considered herself to be a reasonably intelligent person but when it came to Rain she had been the world's biggest fool. Thinking they were in love when the truth was that Rain never really loved her. She loved controlling her sure but Rain was never in love with her.

The day after Rain's graduation Alice went to the woman's apartment and found it empty. Everything was gone except for a lone box in the middle of the floor. Inside were all the cards and love notes she had ever given to Rain as well as a letter addressed to her. Alice could still remember feeling her heart shatter into a million pieces at the sight. Alice had told Rain about her parents, what they had done to her, and here she had gone and done the exact same thing. It was deliberate. And it was the first time Alice recognized Rain as the monster she truly was. To this day Alice didn't know what possessed her to read Rain's letter, she'd never once been tempted to read the one left by parents. But Rain had such a powerful hold over her that at the time Alice had been desperate for answers.

Alice, I hope you aren't too surprised to be getting this letter. I had a great time with you these last two years but it's time to move on to something more serious. I want an adult with a future, not a college kid with no idea about what they want to do and who they want to be. Please don't try to contact me, I'm not interested in pursuing things further with you. -R

Alice had only ever read the note that one time, but the words had burned into her memory, even now years later.

After reading the note Alice had felt something inside herself shift. She convinced herself she was broken, there was no other explanation, why else did people keep leaving her? There was something wrong with her. She had tried to fix it for Rain but she had failed. She cried for hours that night until she was able to calm down. Eventually she wiped the tears from her eyes, ripped the note into shreds and left the pieces behind in the box with the other remnants of her abandoned relationship.

And now, even after four years apart, Alice had allowed herself to be a victim of Rain's manipulation. The moment she saw Rain she should have dragged Claire as far away as possible. But she didn't, she had been in too much shock to do much of anything. She'd just taken it, let Rain introduce herself as if they were strangers, let Rain get her alone when they went to go get drinks.

Alice felt the blood drain from her face as the memory of a mere hour ago replayed in her mind vividly.

'Alice and I are going to get us some drinks' she told JD as she stood up, motioning for Alice to follow. Alice begrudgingly stood up and followed her to the concession stand, not wanting to draw anymore attention to herself by refusing. She just wanted this night to be over. Rain didn't say anything as they waited in line, she waited until they had ordered and were standing off to the side where no one would overhear them.

"What do you want Rain?" Alice asked when she couldn't stand the tension anymore.

"I wanted to say thank you for playing along. You almost blew it there at the beginning by being rude to me but fortunately those two are so dumb they didn't notice."

Alice felt her blood boil. "Claire is not dumb."

"Whatever," Rain dismissed. "Just don't go blabbing to her, I don't want to have to explain anything to JD."

"Yeah, he might realize just how much of a bitch you can be if he knew the details of our relationship."

Rain smiled at that, but her eyes were the coldest Alice had ever seen them and she wondered for the millionth time in her life how she had ever let herself think she had been in love with such a person. "Alice you have no idea how much of a bitch I can be, so let me make myself clear ok? If you tell either one of them about us I will ruin your relationship with Claire and make your life miserable. Understood?"

Alice stared at her, eyes narrowed, determined not to seem scared at the threat Rain had just made. But she was, she had enough experience with the other woman to know not to take anything she said lightly. She knew first hand how manipulative she could be and didn't want to take any chances, especially not when it came to Claire. The redhead was the best thing to ever happen to her and even though Claire was smart and not one to be influenced by others there was no telling what Rain could do to damage their relationship. So Alice said nothing, not wanting to give her the satisfaction of agreeing, but her silence seemed to be enough to appease Rain.

"Good, I'm glad we understand each other."

Now alone in her room with her thoughts Alice hated herself for not speaking up immediately the moment she had seen it was Rain they were meeting. If she had maybe she wouldn't be in this mess. And now she couldn't even tell Claire the truth. She couldn't be sure of the extent of Rain's threat but she wasn't willing to put it to chance. She couldn't even told Carlos because she knew if she did he would have gone after Rain himself and she didn't want a target put on him as well.

"What a fucking disaster" Alice muttered as she kicked off her shoes and threw herself on the bed, the events of the evening making her feel physically and emotionally drained. "I hate everything about today." But as she closed her eyes and started to drift off it was Claire's face that appeared in her mind. "Well, maybe not everything," she mused before rolling over and falling asleep.