The Shocking Ending!
by the wicked Doomed but Over It
Author's Notes-- I'm sure you don't really want me to talk right now, when you're about to read your precious ending...so I'll just give it to you! Enjoy...BTW-- Teen for my mouth...sorry about that, but what would you say? Seriously...O-O read! NOW! I COMMAND IT! (oh and I apologize in advance for my overuse of caps. sorry)
Watanuki turned on Yuuko, furious. "Useless? Who are you calling USELESS? Who makes your food? Who cleans up? Who gets you your hangover medicine!"
"What the FUCK?" Doomed screamed. "WATANUKI-KUN? DOUMEKI-KUN? YUUKO-SAN? YOU'RE REAL?"
"Uh..yeah!" said Yuuko, in her best 'duh' voice. "What did you think?"
"No!" Doomed, striding over. "No. Fucking. Way." she walked over to Watanuki (who was closest), bent down, and grabbed his foot.
"OW! What's your problem, bitch?" he said, as he fell onto the floor. She ignored him and took off his sandal.
"See?" she said, "This proves it." she shoved Watanuki's foot into Yuuko's face. There, in black ink, was what looked like a tattoo. It was a small circle with a C in it, next to the word CLAMP. "You ALL are registered trademarks of CLAMP."
Yuuko bent down, removed her sandal and examined her foot carefully. "Huh." she said. "Well, that does explain somethings. My eyes keep on changing color and my butterflies are all black or purple. I think they used to be orange or red."
"Yeah...and I got a new kimono, and I wasn't quite sure where it came from. Looked okay, though." Doumeki mused.
"So that means..." Doomed said. They could almost hear the cogs moving in her head, rusty from so many years of little or no use, "that I can..." an evil glint came into her eye.
"Watanuki! Pat your head and rub your tummy!" she ordered suddenly. "Yuuko! Laugh in an insane manner! Doumeki! er...um...Start obsessing about Watanuki in a slightly creepy fashion and develop an annoyance for Himawari-chan!"
Confused, all three characters did as they were told. "OOO...We're going to have lots of FUN together..."
"...and that's what I did over my summer break," finished Doomed, raising her eyes from the crumpled sheet of paper.
"WHOA! Let me get this straight...You hijacked the entire cast of xxxHoLic and bent thier wills into a twisted little faux CLAMP universe, which is obviously yaoi and slashy?" the disbelieving readers asked.
"Well...not the whole cast. Those goddamn cameo appearances elude me yet. BUT THIER HOUR WILL COME! You have been warned, evil twin sisters! I forcast a premature death in your future! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!" Doomed continued muttering under her breath about twerpy twins trying to tear Doumeki and Watanuki apart.
"Wow. Hold up. What's the deal with the feet?" asked deranged-monkey. "Doesn't that belong to Toy Story or something?"
"Well...yeah...them and Barbie and almost all the major corporations you can think of...search for the markings on the foot! That's where they hide them, normally." Doomed now muttered about horrid corporations taking over the world and forcing Mom and Pop businesses out of business.
"Oh, God, not that again." said Giggle Monkey. "Listen. You can't go and take all this copywrited crud from all theys multi-million dollar companies with no disclaimer. You're asking to get sued."
"Fine! I own nothing. I live in a paper bag on the corner of 5th and 12th. Happy? I got nothing! Not even this computer! Disclaimer done!"
"Fine. Moving on...that makes no sense! The whole story is retarded."
"Shut up. I'm posting it! Nokturnal Augrey still likes me! Maybe I'll go stay with her! So there!"
------The rest of this story has been deleted due to the fact that it is pointless squabbling between Doomed, Giggle Monkey, deranged-monkey and occasional comments by Banana Lizard (Thank you, censoring done by School Administrators who don't bother to listen when the students suggest brilliant solutions to world problems because we are little children who are idiots and nothing we say could ever work) -------------------
"...and that's the solution to world poverty..." said Doomed.
"HEY! That might just work! We should post this on the internet so people may learn from our discussion!" said Banana Lizard.
"Good idea!" the writers agreed.
Thank you! I know this is borderline crack, but bear with me! Thank you and Good Night! Read and review on your way out. ! P.S. Got a little off topic here! Forgive me, darling readers!
Love,
Doomed
P.S. SAVE US! SHE'S A YAOI AND YURI WRITER! WE'RE BEING PAIRED! PLEASE...SAVE US! W.D.Y. xxxCast
