Title: Past the Picket Fence
Chapter 3: As Our Hopes Go Down the Drain
A/N: I put this off too long, I blame the start of school, but it was only the first week and nothing happens in the first week. Sometimes college is a joke. The rest can be attributed to trying to work out some issues with the next chapter –which really didn't get worked out, and laziness.
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Naruto woke up damp and feeling chafed because of it. He was, however, warm, but more importantly, he wasn't being rained on.
That had the potential to be very bad.
He determined he was on a bed, though, which didn't quite fit in with the whole 'out in the middle of nowhere in a creepy cave with psychopaths' situation he imagined. That scenario had been based off a somewhat similar one of when Gaara was briefly captured by the Akatsuki.
"So you're awake," Kisame said from somewhere else in the room. Naruto let his head fall in the direction of the voice.
He could see a fireplace with included fire, wooden walls, and a crazy shark man with a sword sitting in a corner at a table.
He did not see Itachi.
For some reason, that frightened him very much.
He heard rain pounding against the window pane in fury. The wind was howling, and he figured that it must be pretty bad outside. Crappy for …traveling.
Suddenly, as that thought hit Naruto, he had hope swirl through him as the possibility that he might not be at Akatsuki headquarters entered strongly into his mind. If the lack of a cave-like atmosphere hadn't done it.
It looked as though they had rented a room for the night.
Quietly, and with no small amount of fear at being discovered, Naruto wiggled the fingers of his left hand, the side not facing Hoshigaki Kisame.
They responded easily.
It was then that Naruto realized that the weight of his limbs felt significantly less than they had when he woke up in Kabuto's cart.
Apparently the drug had worn off. Distraction would be necessary.
"Where's my favorite Uchiha?"
Kisame snorted. "Around."
"Do you think he might want to play charades?"
"No."
Of course, then the former Mist nin actually thought about that and couldn't help but grin.
"I bet he'd be good at it."
"Oh yeah? How so?" Kisame chuckled, vaguely amused by his captive.
"He's good at everything."
That was true enough.
"Are you two best friends?"
Kisame nearly choked. The members of Akatsuki did not have 'friends'. Although he and Itachi got along very well, as far as homicidal maniacs could, and would sometimes go to bars together.
Or he would hang out with other Akatsuki members off-duty and they would bullshit about things that weren't work related in the slightest. Sometimes they'd play pranks on each other. He was even in a bowling league with a few of them. Dare say, he even enjoyed their company.
"Yes. We're best friends and we go to our quilting club every Tuesday."
It was Naruto's turn to try not to laugh. He hated to admit it, but he and Kisame could maybe have been friends another time, another place.
"That sounds lovely. I'm sure you can make nice quilts."
"Only the best."
It was at this point that Naruto whipped through the seals to create his kage bunshin, his heart pounding as he wondered if the drug he had been injected with would affect his chakra.
In an instant smoke rudely crammed the enclosed area.
The room was as full with Naruto clones as he could reasonably get it. Relieved, but too pumped on adrenaline to give it much thought, his mind spun wildly for an idea on what to do next.
He wasn't the type to plan. He was a genius at improvisation, but that was more a matter of his personal opinion than anyone else's.
Naruto worked best under pressure anyway.
He could already hear Kisame drawing his sword and chuckling, as he gave the command for his clones to combine with another jutsu, praying his seals were faster than the Akatsuki's sword.
The door to the hallway burst open. He could only assume it was Itachi. That meant he had to get out, now.
Naruto leaped off the bed as the room filled with smoke again, crashing through the window as the sound of a roomful of giggles was left behind.
If it didn't stop them, his 'Harem no jutsu' should at least confuse them.
As he fell three storeys, he briefly considered that it may not have been the best plan to jump out of an unknown window of an unknown building.
He wasn't a ninja for nothing though.
He hit the ground running.
With a wicked grin, another idea popped into his head and he commanded a few clones nearest to Kisame to perform one more henge.
A startled yelp and the sudden cessation of clone death (from what Naruto could tell since no new information was returning to him from destroyed bunshins) told him that it was at least, somewhat successful.
The other part of the escape wasn't so pleasant.
Naruto nearly slipped in the mud as his vision was blinded by the sudden rain. Wind beat at him like it caught him in bed with its wife. His blood felt as if it were pounding through veins too small.
He didn't know where he was going, or if he was being followed yet.
All he knew is that if he stopped pushing chakra to his feet, he was dead.
-
Kakashi had found something better than thicker foliage. He found a town! Just in time, too.
It seemed the moment he stepped in the door of the only inn he could see –as it didn't appear to be a very large town, the downpour outside doubled.
He walked up to the counter where a bored looking girl sat on a stool, her face propped up on her hand as she read a book.
"Uh, excuse me miss, I need a room," he said, with his usual brand of Kakashi cheer.
"Single or double?" she asked, not bothering to look up at him as she turned another page.
"Single."
"Pay up front."
"How much?"
She pointed to a sign on the corner of the counter listing the rates.
He unsnapped the top of the pack on the rear of his hip and dug out a wallet. He was relieved that he actually remembered to bring money. Sometimes he forgot, and then he had to borrow from Gai –who had very high interest rates. He tried to borrow money from Naruto, but Naruto had (shockingly) proven too smart for that. The blonde must've heard how much he owed Gai.
He set a couple bills on the counter, pushing them towards the girl.
Without looking up from her book, she took them and pushed some buttons on the cash register, before feeding them in. Her hand went below the counter for a minute to grab a set of room keys.
She flicked her eyes to the number on them before tossing them on the counter in his general direction.
"Room 214. Up the stairs to the left."
"Ah. Thanks."
He walked away vaguely reminded of another disaffected teenager that he had once instructed for a very brief year or so. That one had turned out to be a traitor and left the village, and hadn't even bothered to send a card or a note through the mail in all the time since he had left. Inconsiderate child.
Hell, the copy nin saw that particular student's brother more than he saw him.
He was probably about to see said brother again.
Kakashi climbed the stairs as instructed, tired and slightly wet from the rain. A warm bed sounded nice, even if he wasn't sure if he could get to sleep. He stopped midway up when he felt a clench in his gut. Something was up.
Straining his senses, he could find nothing out of the ordinary. It didn't settle the feeling of apprehension that was slowly rising.
A sudden explosion of chakra from one of the rooms affirmed his suspicions. Running up the rest of the stairs, he was slightly shocked to see Uchiha Itachi rush to open a door only to have a group of undressed blonde women fall onto him.
Kakashi watched as the prodigy's eyes widened, having obviously expected something more along the lines of an attack. Or rather, a more conventional attack –which in Kakashi's opinion, Itachi should have expected unconventional methods from Naruto, especially if he had been chasing him for several years now. Of course, the jounin could admit to himself if no one else, that he was commonly caught off-guard by Naruto's tactics, and he sparred with him probably once a week at the very least.
Kakashi couldn't help snickering as he ran past a very shocked (though hardly showing it) Uchiha who vaguely looked as if he didn't quite know what to do.
That must've been a first for him.
The Konoha jounin was surprised, however, to find that many clones crowded into the room. A happy cry from somewhere in the corner as a sword slashed around told Kakashi that a few clones probably just disappeared.
He was hoping Itachi wouldn't jump up and stab him through the back of the neck when an odd cry came from a corner of the room as a few select clones henged into what appeared to be Uchiha Itachi in a hot dog suit… and wearing what looked like a banana-yellow skin-tight body suit with watermelon melon print slices on underneath.
It took him a moment before he could look away.
He looked back at Itachi, to find the hallway empty. Presumably, the Uchiha had brutally murdered the clones then ran off to find Naruto.
After all, Naruto was the only person capable of… this.
Kakashi ran after the Uchiha, intent on giving Naruto the time he surely needed. Especially after that last stunt.
-
The rain poured steadily around them as they stood in the open area.
"This is not going to work," Kiba said.
He and Akamaru had just been made useless.
Neji and Shikamaru nodded in agreement. Sakura's brow tightened.
"It's starting to look hopeless," Shikamaru said.
Sakura could feel her fists tighten at her sides, frustration pouring through her. This was not something she wanted to hear. It wasn't just her former cell out there, it was like her family.
"They're all the team I have left!" Sakura cried, trying to choke off the helpless feeling rising from her gut. After a moment, she regained control of herself, took a deep breath and looked at her current team and smiled weakly, "…No offense, guys."
"None taken," Neji replied and activated his byakugan. "However, this rain would be hindering to them as well." It was about as close as he came to comforting.
Sakura nodded. Naruto would be given some time, but they couldn't exactly get to him.
"We can't do anything in this rain," Shikamaru said, looking even more put out than usual.
"There's a cave not too far over that way," Neji pointed in the direction, "at least we can get out of the storm." It would allow them to rest a little and hopefully come up with a working plan.
Sakura bit her lower lip as they headed out, this time towards shelter. She was wet and cold, but she didn't want to call the game on account of rain.
Even though she knew better.
About twenty minutes later, she was looking out of the cave mouth while Kiba was trying to start a fire with wet wood. It could be done, it just wasn't easy. Someone with some good fire jutsus could always start one… like a former teammate of hers, but she was too mad at the moment to bother with thinking about him. Her feelings on the subject were rather mixed.
Neji and Shikamaru were looking at a map that they had gotten from Tsunade. It was a big map with tiny print and the two were having trouble making some of it out, mostly due to a lack of adequate lighting.
They were all soaked through and freezing. Sakura couldn't see five feet outside the cave with the downpour. Anyone out in that weather would either be desperate or a fool.
"It looks like there's a few villages in the area. Small ones," Shikamaru said, pointing to a spot on the map.
"This is the direction that the trail was heading," Neji said, as he pointed to a different spot.
"If Naruto was conscious, they wouldn't bother going near a village, too much of a risk with his mouth and… 'spontaneity'…, but if they got caught in this weather…"
"His teammates from his mission thought he had been drugged," Sakura said, arms wrapped around herself for warmth as she stared out into the forest.
"So it's more likely they hit a town. Which would be good for us," Shikamaru answered, searching the map.
"The first trail might have sort of wound around in the woods a bit, but the second trail was more direct," The lazy shinobi stated, as he recalled how it first looked as though whoever took Naruto was trying to be evasive –rather well, he might add. Then they had very recently found where the person they assumed had Naruto had met with at least two other people.
The trail they had started to follow had been much better disguised, and if not for Akamaru, they would have lost it a few times. It was, at least, a little more direct.
"Got it!" Kiba cheered as the smoke that had been filling the air over him suddenly was accompanied by a flame.
Sakura turned to look back at him. The three looked slightly less miserable and concerned with the fire started.
She smiled slightly. They maybe couldn't do anything right now, but as soon as the rain let up, they'd be out there, and maybe Kakashi would have left a clue that wouldn't be washed away by the rain.
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Naruto didn't know how long he had been running, but it was still raining, his legs were starting to hurt, and it was dark out. He couldn't really see where he was going, and was a little terrified that he might run into a tree and knock himself out.
He honestly couldn't say what direction he was headed in, since he had switched so many times, and he was sure he wouldn't be able to find the village he had escaped from even if he wanted to, which he didn't.
He was fairly certain that he wasn't being followed, but considering he was running from two Akatsuki members, that could mean nothing.
Mostly, he was trying to find a very good hiding place, because he wasn't really in the best condition to fight. Ideally a hiding spot where he could launch surprise attacks from would be his number one choice, but since he couldn't really find anything that looked like it would give adequate cover from a member of the Akatsuki, he was beginning to get a little panicked.
He would kill for some decent underbrush. Or a large bush.
On the other hand, this was the tidiest woods he had ever seen.
He was about to switch directions again when his foot slipped and he found himself sliding down a short slope. That wasn't a problem. The cliff at the bottom of the slope was.
Especially when he found that he couldn't stop himself and began a freefall in the air.
He looked down -at least he assumed it was down, because the sky was in the other direction, and realized how high up he had been, but the distance was rapidly decreasing.
At least there was water below him… in the form of river rapids and what appeared to be tiny jagged rocks that were ever-increasing in size.
Only one thought really rang through his mind.
/This sucks./
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Itachi should have felt annoyed.
Hatake Kakashi had briefly engaged him, and while he was stronger than the legendary jounin, the man was still not an opponent to be underestimated.
That much was made certain from the very beginning of the scuffle.
Both knew that if Itachi wanted Naruto captured, he couldn't risk wasting his chakra using Tsukiyomi.
That was probably why Kakashi had looked so surprised when he was caught in the genjutsu.
Itachi hadn't waited around for his opponent to come out of it, even if it typically only took a second or two. After all, Kakashi had been trapped in it before, and he had a sharingan eye, so who knew what kind of defenses he may have developed?
He had a feeling that the jounin would at least make his way to a bed before collapsing completely.
Again, he should have felt annoyed. About losing his chance to catch Naruto Uzumaki.
Itachi would probably never say it, but he was slightly impressed with the blonde's escape. Granted, the methods used had been a little… unorthodox… but then again, in the past years, reports coming in to the Akatsuki had showed a sharp increase in not only skill but also unpredictability.
So while he had been expecting something to happen, he just hadn't known what. Although the henge of himself was uncalled for, and he would make sure to save a very special Tsukiyomi for the Uzumaki idiot before he was killed for the ambitions of the group.
It was while he was walking through the woods -wandering, really, but he'd never admit to it- that Kisame suddenly appeared by his side.
"He shouldn't have been able to move for another hour!"
"It would seem Kabuto lied to us," Itachi commented before looking sideways at Kisame, "You let him get away."
The former Mist nin grinned.
"We're bowling this week for the league championship. I'm not putting all that hard work to waste just because of some mission we've been failing at for years. Besides, last time wasn't it you who wanted to put it off so you could go have your kunai repaired?"
"That is essential for our work. Bowling is not."
"I'm not going to just ignore the sweat and blood of the team for this."
"Sweat and… blood?" Itachi actually raised an eyebrow, however slight it may have been.
"We're a team of Akatsuki. We do everything to the extreme."
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Kabuto looked at the frog wallet. It was about half full.
If somehow Naruto made it out of this alive, he'd probably be upset if he ever found out Kabuto robbed him.
The medic grinned.
It was fun being devious. He just hoped Orochimaru didn't find out.
Although, it was really the sennin's fault for denying him the pay raise.
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Sakura was relieved when she woke up to find the rain stopped. Dawn hadn't broken yet, but she saw that her team was already stirring.
Breakfast was a hurried affair. They were on their way within twenty minutes.
Half an hour later, Neji's byakugan spotted a pile of rocks. They were in the shape of a pyramid. Man-made.
It wasn't long before they found one in the shape of Konoha's leaf symbol.
Sakura grinned. Kakashi came through after all.
-
Kakashi had spent the night on the floor of his room, having passed out only a few feet from his bed.
He wouldn't wake up for at least another day or two.
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Itachi and Kisame (who had yet to mention anything about the special henges) had managed to figure out where Naruto had gone, if the various broken twigs and destroyed flora was any indication.
The corrugated earth at the edge of cliff was slightly alarming. It looked as if someone had slid right off.
"If he died…" Kisame began, the implications starting to roll in.
"Then we would receive a new mission," Itachi finished. Neither one was too keen on that. The missions that the Akatsuki handed out weren't known for their high levels of enjoyment.
It wasn't a favorable prospect.
Especially since Naruto had always kept things interesting.
Not to mention relatively entertaining.
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A/N: First and foremost, thank you to Kamikaze Tama, for general help and for the suggestion that I do something disturbing with the clones, hence the hotdog and banana-yellow watermelon-slice suits of the henge Itachi.
Well, that is the end of what I would call the 'extended prologue'. The next chapter –which is started, kind of takes a turn for the bizarre.
And if anyone else is interested in helping with some plot points, let me know and how you want to be contacted. I get the feeling I can use all the help I can get from here on out.
