There's nothing wrong with your Television 2

Part 1: And Now Yet Again Still Even More Fragments Chapter 3

Fonzie stared at the bottle.

Alex grinned. "Open it."

"There is a genie in there," Fonzie said, unsure what to think.

"Specifically, Jeannie," the heavy-set teen agreed.

"And you're entrusting me, Arthur Fonzarelli with… with that much power?" he asked in confusion.

"Someone has to water the clock," Alex replied.

Fonzie blinked and tilted his head like a dog listening for something. "This helps wind the clock on the world?"

"Unless you decide to destroy everything," Alex said amused, "but come on, you aren't a breaker, you're a bearer."

"A bearer?" Fonzie asked curiously.

"A bearer," Alex repeated, "one of those who help support the beam."

"Me? I don't recall doing anything like that, I'm just a grease monkey," Fonzie denied.

Alex laughed. "Fonzie, the weight of the world is born on the back of the population as a whole."

"So, everyone is a bearer?" Fonzie asked, looking relieved at the thought.

"You can't support the world on one person's back," Alex told him, "it's just that some can take more weight than others. The people who carry the most weight I call bearers."

Fonzie took a deep breath and slowly let it out regaining his cool. "I can take some weight," he agreed, "just not the whole world."

Alex nodded. "It's not all on you, a lot of people are watering the clock and it's not the only clock in the world being watered either."

"Alright, that is a massive relief," Fonzie admitted.

"Cunningham is a bearer," Alex said, "and he carries a lot more weight than you."

"Cunningham?" Fonzie asked in disbelief before a look of understanding came on his face. "Yeah, I can see that. Richie helps people and even when he's afraid, he doesn't let it stop him."

"Exactamundo," Alex said. "So, what will you do with a genie?"

"I could make life easier for everyone," Fonzie said with a smile.

"And that would help them bear the weight of the world?" Alex asked.

Fonzie paused. "I've met guys who were given everything to them their entire lives… it did not make them strong," he thought aloud. "But if I'm not supposed to help people, what am I supposed to do?"

"You've almost got it," Alex assured him, "think it through."

"There is a difference between helping people and doing everything for them, people have to pull their own weight or it… damages them," Fonzie said beginning to pace.

"You're getting there," Alex encouraged him.

"I can help those who are given too much weight," Fonzie said, "make a little adjustment here and there like tuning up a car. Lighten the load a little here and encourage someone else to do more, take on a little more weight over there."

"Now you've got it," Alex said with a nod. "I knew you were a good choice."

"I don't know if I'm up to it," Fonzie admitted. "I mean, I'm going to make a lot of mistakes starting out."

"That's part of life," Alex waved it off. "Start off small and try to think long term. Don't worry about making mistakes, worry about fixing them."

"I can do that," Fonzie agreed. "So, what do I do now?"

Alex gestured to the bottle.

Fonzie nodded and picked up the bottle from the coffee table. He took a deep breath and pulled out the cork.

Pink smoke billowed out of the bottle reforming into a blonde haired, blue eyed vision of beauty dressed in a pink and red harem outfit that before now had only really existed in the fantasies of men.

"Master?" she asked as she looked up into Fonzie's eyes, her voice filled with yearning.

"Call me Fonzie," he told her, setting her bottle down.

"Master!" she exclaimed and threw her arms around him.

Fonzie was surprised at her response but his arms reflexively wrapped around her.

"She's spent centuries alone with no love or affection," Alex told him. "I always thought Major Nelson was a dick in how he treated her. I trust you won't have that problem?"

Jeanie turned in Fonzie's arms, content to keep them around her to see who was talking. Her eyes widened as she spotted Control Freak.

"I've never had a problem showing a beautiful lady love and affection," Fonzie assured him, making Jeanie squeal happily.

"Good, then my job here is done," Control Freak said. "I'd suggest your first wish be to speed up time in here, so you have a week or two without interruptions to get to know one another and catch her up on recent events."

"I can do that!" Jeanie said excitedly, crossing her arms and nodding her head, altering the flow of time. She looked up into Fonzie's face seeking approval.

"Very cool," he assured her with a smile as he gave her a squeeze.

Control Freak took out his remote and changed the channel, the screen becoming color. "I'd say treat her well, but you know better how to do that than I do. Remember to listen to her, while she is excessively optimistic, sometimes that is exactly what the situation calls for. Later!"

Control Freak stepped into the screen and the TV shut itself off.

Fonzie looked down at Jeanie. "Now, what is your first wish?"

"Could…" She licked her lips nervously. "Could we cuddle?" she asked.

"Your wish is my command," Fonzie said, snagging her up in a bridal carry.

OoOoOoOoOo

Control Freak extended a hand letting a blue and red spider land on it. "Bite me," he said poking the spider. He winced as the annoyed arachnid did as requested.

"Why did you do that?!" a mystified Peter Parker asked.

Control freak dumped the spider on Peter's collar.

"Argh!" Peter yelled as the spider bit him too and scurried off. "Why?"

"I'll tell you later," Control Freak promised before stumbling off, his blood feeling like it was on fire.

"Peter!" Someone yelled behind him as the teen collapsed.

Control Freak managed to stumble to a security monitor and hit the favorite button on his remote control before collapsing into the screen.

'Captain America is good, but Spiderman is awesome,' he thought to himself as everything faded to black.

He awoke in a pile of pillows with a yellow and pink blur in front of his face mopping the sweat from his brow. "The fever is breaking, you should be ok. Just rest for now."

As he drifted in and out of consciousness he couldn't help but wonder if he'd hit the wrong button by mistake, as Star Trek would have him in a proper hospital bed not a pile of pillows and blankets.

The voice sang a gentle lullaby as she cleaned him and he slowly woke up.

"Where am I?" Alex asked before realizing exactly where he was.

"You're in my cottage," a small butter yellow pegasus said kindly. "I've been taking care of you while you were sick."

Alex noticed he was naked, which wasn't surprising considering she'd just been giving him a sponge bath, but that was immediately pushed aside by the realization that he had muscles and big ones at that!

"My name's Alex," Control Freak introduced himself and offered a hand, "thank you for caring for me."

"Oh, it's no problem," she said cheerfully touching his hand with a hoof. "My name's Fluttershy. What species are you? The closest I've seen is a monkey, but you don't have a tail and unless you are suffering from some sort of mange, which I have seen no evidence of, you have a lot less fur."

"My species is related to monkey, but way far back," he assured her, "we are closer to apes. Hairless apes is one of the most used names for us by the other apes."

"Ah, that is a nice name," she said with a smile, "very descriptive."

"Thanks," Alex said. "I feel like a million bucks… like a fortune. Can I have my clothes?"

"Ah, Twilight has them," Fluttershy said. "If you're feeling better we can walk over to her place and retrieve them."

Alex considered that for all of half a second. "Umm, my species has a pretty strong nudity taboo."

"Oh," Fluttershy said. "Should I not have removed them then?"

"You're a caregiver, you are exempt from the taboo," Alex explained, "but I can't be naked around people I am not in a close relationship with."

"That's why you're exhibiting sexual arousal, a conditioned response!" she said excitedly.

Alex looked down and then back up at the curious equine. "Actually, that means I have to pee."

"The bathroom is just through that door," Fluttershy said, gesturing to the side of the room.

A few minutes later

"See, all better," Alex said. 'Thank god! For a moment I was worried I was that kind of Brony! In your face Magnolia-fan!'

"But you're still presenting," she noted. "Are you in season?"

"Presenting?" he rolled the question around in his mind before realizing what she meant. "We don't have a season, we can mate year round and our genitals are always out, they don't retract."

"Hence the nudity taboo," she realized.

"Precisely," Alex agreed.

"Is your species sensitive to cold?" Fluttershy asked.

"We are sensitive to nearly everything," Alex replied, "that's why we cover most of our skin."

"Are you amphibious?" she asked eagerly.

"We like to play in the water and sometimes we hunt in it," Alex replied, "but really it come down to personal preference. Hairless apes tend to adapt to any environment we move into."

"What is your diet like?" she asked. "I fed you some vegetable broth while you were sick as it was the softest food I could think of, and you were losing so much weight I had to feed you something!"

"We are omnivores," he explained. "As long as it isn't intelligent we will eat it."

Fluttershy took out a notebook and wrote some things down. "I'd love to talk more about your species, but I really should feed the chickens."

"If you have a sheet or blanket in my size, I can fashion a toga out of it and give you a hand," he offered wanting to stretch his legs.

"Are you sure you'll be OK?" she asked concerned.

"Your clothes were a lot more durable and covering than a simple sheet would be."

"I'll be fine," he assured her, "those clothes were designed for protection in dangerous situations, not just sitting around the house or working in the yard."

"Oh, OK," the little pegasus said, retrieving a sheet from another room.

It took Alex a few minutes to make a functional toga, Fluttershy had to help as she seemed to get the concept better than he did.

"I always thought it was easy to make a toga," Alex said, "but I never did try before."

He helped her feed the animals, of which there were many, and was pleased to find that things he would have struggled with before were easy now.

"That went a lot faster than usual," Fluttershy said brightly. "Is the toga enough of a covering to be seen around strangers in? Because if it is we can retrieve your things now."

"The toga is fine," he assured her.

"What about your hooves?"

"My hooves? My feet," he corrected her. "My feet will be fine."

"You had some fairly hefty covering on them," Fluttershy pointed out.

"In case of harsh terrain," he explained, "cobblestones and grass are fine."

"Alright, let me get my bag," Fluttershy disappeared into her cottage and returned a few seconds later wearing a pair of saddle bags.

They walked down a well-worn path, passing an old pony who was squinting through his glasses as the angry rabbit he'd been watering who was slowly reaching for the hose.

"You mentioned that your species hunted in the water," Fluttershy said, "can you tell me about your species hunting patterns?"

"Sure," Alex agreed, surprised at how inquisitive Fluttershy was. "In the water we often fish using poles, spears, nets or even sometimes just our hands in shallow enough water. Land and air hunting are also something we do. These days we mostly use farms to grow our food, so hunting is rare, but a lot of us like to keep our hand in by fishing if nothing else."

"Twilight did say you appeared to be from a very advanced tool using species," Fluttershy noted.

"Intelligence, tool use, and endurance are our three main traits," Alex agreed. A pony stared at the pair as they reached the outskirts of Ponyville.

"Endurance?" Fluttershy asked.

"Oh yeah," Alex said with a grin. "Hairless apes are famed for our endurance. Before we developed all our tools we hunted by chasing down prey. We aren't the fastest or the strongest and we have almost no natural armor but there was not a creature in existence that we couldn't chase until it died of exhaustion."

"Hold on," Fluttershy stopped and took out her notepad from her bag and made some more notes before putting it away again. "I really envy Unicorns being able to write and walk at the same time," she admitted with a smile.

"We aren't in any rush," Alex assured her. "It's a nice day." A few young ponies followed them at a distance whispering to each other.

"Thank you," Fluttershy said, "and thanks for putting up with all my questions, it's really quite nice of you."

"You took in a strange mammal who was sick and nursed him back to health," Alex pointed out, "this is the least I could do."

"Oh, it was no trouble," she assured him.

"So what else do you want to know about my species?"

"What is your diet like?" she asked.

"Meat heavy and high in sugar and salt," Alex replied. "It's not really healthy for us, but it's cheap and quick. We really should eat more white meat and less red, avoid so much salts and preservatives and increase our vegetable intake, but my species can be pretty lazy at times."

"So, the vegetable broth was OK?" she asked.

"While a meat broth would have been a bit better, it was just about perfect," he assured her. "My kind can subsist almost entirely on vegetables if we eat enough nuts to make up for the lack of meat, at least in the short term."

There was a screech of fright from a pegasus who came around the corner of a building and spotted them before it took to the skies in fright.

The pair ignored it.

"What kind of animals do you harvest meat from beside fish?" she asked.

"All types," he replied. "Where I am from we have unintelligent animals that resemble most all the types you know."

"Are you sure they're unintelligent?" Fluttershy asked. "They could just be a mute variant or not have been taught to talk."

"Our version of chicken have been known to stand in the rain and stare up at the sky until they drown," Alex replied.

"Definitely not intelligent," Fluttershy admitted.

"We have some arguments on the intelligence level of a handful of animals and have moved them off the list," he explained. "Out three main food animals are superficially similar to chickens, cows, and pigs."

"Do you have anything similar to ponies?" Fluttershy asked as they reached a huge tree that had been turned into a library.

"Horses are about three times your size and the colors are limited to white, brown, and black for the most part. We ride them and have a symbiotic relationship with them. They have no horns or wings, most resembling Earth ponies," he said.

The door opened and a purple unicorn was revealed. "Fluttershy and…" she trailed off waiting for an introduction.

"Just a second," Fluttershy said distractedly as she wrote something down.

"Alex," he introduced himself, "and you must be Twilight."

"I am," she agreed, "and it's very nice to meet you. The things you were carrying on you are simply fascinating!"

"Yeah, my people developed physical sciences to compensate for an almost complete lack of magic," Alex replied, trying to see if from the point of view of a pony.

"Really?" she asked excitedly, practically vibrating in place.

"Really, really," he replied, making a pop culture reference even though he knew she wouldn't get it.

"Come inside, you'll have to tell me all about it!"

"As soon as I get dressed," he assured her.

"Everything is on the table," Twilight replied, "except for the candy bar you dropped when you arrived, Spike ate that."

"Candy bar?" Alex asked, biting back a groan as he knew where this was going.

"Some type of chocolate with traces of metal according to Spike," Twilight replied.

"He really shouldn't eat things off the ground, but he's still just a baby," Fluttershy said with a giggle as they entered the Library.

"I wasn't carrying a candy bar," Alex said with a sigh.

"What were you carrying?" Twilight asked.

"My remote control."

Typing by: fyrewolf5 (damn new gmail layout, completely missed this chapter for a few days because of the layout and getting multiple emails in a row)