I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road

When I was about five, I had my first lesson in why no one should ever piss off my Dad. Mum used to take me to this wizard play group so I could learn to be social before I inevitably started my schooling at Hogwarts. I had a tutor, but tutors didn't do much in the way of learning how to play well with others. I went to this play group every day for two hours. It was the most fun I'd ever had in my life. The only problem was that my Mum never told Dad about it. I didn't understand back then why I had to say that every day Mummy and I went to the park or on a picnic or something. Why couldn't I just tell Dad about playing with all those kids?

Well, one day I found out why not. Somehow, Dad found out about our daily ritual, and he was mad. No, I take that back. He was beyond pissed. He was absolutely livid that my mother hadn't told him. What I didn't know at the time was that the play group wasn't pureblood-only, I guess because there just wasn't a large enough clientele to bother making one. He came home screaming at her, calling her things I had never heard before, and then he hit her. My beautiful mother, with a blood red handprint on her face… it made me want to hurt him. Being five years old, I tried. I didn't realize how much stronger he was than me, just that he was hurting someone I loved very much.

What transpired, I can't even bring myself to say. It resulted in the first of my many scars, always carefully hidden away where no one but myself would see them. I think he did that on purpose. Never did that man leave a mark on my beautiful face where everyone would see what horrors I lived through. He kept up the front of a perfect father and husband.

My mother and I were terrified of him. Her marriage had been an arranged one, as many pureblood families used to and still do. I'm not saying my mother was perfect. She was a spoiled brat, used to getting everything her way. She thought she was better than everyone else and looked down her nose at those she considered inferior. I can't say I didn't do the same. But we weren't like my Dad, we weren't killers. After all, if you don't have people beneath you, what makes you special? But regardless of all her faults, she didn't deserve having to put up with my father. He hit her if she did something that displeased him and she could do nothing about it. She was trapped, and so was I.

And the funny thing is, through all of my Dad hurting me, all I wanted was for him to love me and to grow up and find someone that I loved who loved me back. Cheesy, I know.

But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through

I couldn't see how every sign
Pointed straight to you

It wasn't until the summer before I started Hogwarts that my Dad broke me. I always believed that mudbloods were beneath me, but I never thought they were scum not worthy of licking my shoes. They were like peasants, and I was a Prince. Father rid me of that thought with a few well placed beatings and promises of more to come if I did not uphold the family name while at school.

I made the mistake of crying during one of the beatings. I think that was the single most terrifying moment of my life. Dad's eyes flashed dangerously and he told me that Malfoys did not cry. From that day forward, I didn't. I came to Hogwarts and insulted anyone who was beneath me, treating them as my father expected. I never thought about what it would be like to be friends with any of them or wished that I could change my ways. Maybe I should have, but then again, maybe if I had, I would have never found my way to you. I mean, everything happens for a reason, right?


Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart,
They were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I finally found one person who I could be almost completely honest with. Pansy Parkinson. I thought she was my one true love, I really did. We dated throughout most of our time at Hogwarts. I even took her to the Yule Ball. At the time, I thought it was amazing. I had found someone to love; A pureblooded witch who was just like me. I lost my virginity to her in our fifth year.

She doted on me, and (in private), I her. I bought her expensive jewelry and did everything I could to show her how special she was to me. I had friends and a girlfriend and I could not have been happier.. The Dark Lord my father so worshipped had come back at the end of our fourth year. At the end of our fifth, my father was sent to prison. I didn't know how I was supposed to feel. I was outraged, but at the same time, there was a tiny voice in my head telling me that he couldn't beat me if he was in Azkaban.

Then one night, I got an owl saying that I was summoned to meet with the Dark Lord. I knew I couldn't ignore it, for my father would eventually be out of jail, and ignoring his Lord's wishes meant he probably wouldn't restrain himself from killing me. So I went, bowed my head, turned off all my emotions as I had learned to do with Dad. And do you know what the crazy man told me? I had to kill the headmaster. I mean, I had never liked the man, but kill him? I had never thought about killing anyone. I couldn't say no, though. He threatened to kill my Mum. So many terrible things had happened to her. She had just as many hidden scars as I. For once in my life, I had the ability to protect her. And I was going to do just that.

I spent an entire year trying to kill Dumbledore. It was tearing me up inside, the fear of losing Mum, of getting caught. For the first time since my father had told me Malfoys don't, I cried. I sat in the bathroom and cried until I felt a little better. I hadn't felt Myrtle's hand on me, after all, she's a ghost, but when I looked up she was there. She was there for me when no one else could be, because I could not tell a living soul of what I had to do.

I was determined not to fail my mother. At the end of the year, I finally got my chance to complete my mission. I was ready to do it. And then the man started talking. He made me lower my wand. I'm not a killer. I never was. I couldn't become one. I knew all that, and when I lowered my wand I was filled with happiness. Dumbledore was going to protect me and Mum. We could leave Dad to rot in Azkaban and be safe! Then Snape ruined it.

We fled from the school. Shortly after, all the Death Eater kids came as well. Apparently Voldemort had never thought I would succeed, so I wasn't punished too badly. Just the longest Crucio of my life, nothing compared to what my father did to me on a regular basis. What killed me was Pansy. When she found out I hadn't been able to do it, she left, and never looked back. I was broken hearted.

I moped around until one day, Dad was out of prison. Voldemort may have been lenient, but he sure as hell wasn't. He tortured me and Mum to within inches of our lives. I don't understand why he hurt Mum for it, but he did. He raged and screamed and when he was finally too tired or bored to hurt us anymore, he left to go meet with Voldemort. It was my only chance, and I knew it. I took Mum, and I ran to the light.

I think about the years I spent
Just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost
And give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there
You understand
It's all part of a grander plan
That is coming true

From the moment I ran, I knew it was the right thing. I just didn't know where it was going to lead me and that I would be so wonderfully happy for the first time in my life. I wish I could go back and change everything so that I came around earlier, so I could be with you that much sooner. I feel like we have lost so much time. But I am straying from my story, love.

I came to the light side for protection, but I never thought I would fight for them. The more I was around you and those bodyguards of yours, the more I realized how crazy Dad was. Mrs. Weasley, who I had looked down upon for years, cooked me and Mum dinner in the middle of the night when we arrived at her house asking for protection. She called Potter and they moved us to Headquarters. It occurred to me that no one I had known before that would have done those things for me or Mum, especially not after all the horrible things we had said to her family. I guess that's just the difference between good and evil, huh?

All my life I had wanted someone to love and while being cooped up in a house full of people I hated, I found it. It began slowly, and I assumed it was just because I hadn't seen any other girls in such a long time, but I started to notice you more and more. I watched you and felt dirty, because you were a mudblood. One day, you asked me a question that changed my life forever. You asked, "Why does your blood make you any better, Malfoy?" It stumped me. I was superior. I knew this, but no one had ever bothered to tell me why.

Then came the last battle. Potter had killed Voldemort and the death eaters were being locked away. Somehow, my father got away and he came at me. He was screaming obscenities about how I betrayed him and started beating me. You came and pulled him off of me. I had never thought there could be so much strength in such a small body. You pointed your wand at his heart and waited for an auror to come restrain him. They did, and you came to me and asked me if I was okay. To be honest, no one had ever asked that before. So I guess that was the official beginning, when I started to fall for you, even though I had been watching you for so much longer.

After the war was over, old grudges didn't seem to matter anymore. Even Potty and the Weasel forgave me. One day you surprised me. I kept my feelings for you hidden. I didn't think it could ever amount to anything. Out of the blue, you arrived on my doorstep and kissed me. Yep, I knew you were the one for me. What I had felt for Pansy suddenly became nothing. The intensity of your lips on mine made everything I had thought to be real vanish in a split second. My heart broke into a million pieces and you pieced them back together in a moment in time, but you kept a part of it, and you still have it today.

Somehow I convinced you to marry me. You said you were crazy and I'm pretty sure you're right. Everyone we knew were there, and surprisingly no one stood up when they asked if anyone had any objections. We were married. You were mine. Forever. And I finally had everything I had ever wanted, only it was nothing like I imagined it. It startled me to think how far my path had strayed from its original course, but I couldn't have been more happy it had.

Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

So now I am laying here next to you, watching you sleep and whispering in your ear. I know you haven't heard a thing I said to you, but somehow I think you already know everything I think and feel. If I had a chance to do everything over again, I wouldn't change a thing, because everything I ever did led me to you, no matter how long it took or how broken the road.

Not only that, but it led me to the best thing I could ever do with my life. I run my fingers over your pregnant belly and feel the best thing I could ever do kick. Yep, I wouldn't change a thing.

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.