Thank you so much for all the reviews! But, some credit has to go to my brother, he came up with the swirly idea.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny.

A Tale of Two Idiots

Chapter 2

Even More Fun

A portal of darkness appeared in Xemnas's room, and out stepped none other than Axel and Roxas. Why were they here? One word: blackmail.

"All right, If I were Mr. Lovesick, where would I hide my girlfriends number?" Axel asked Roxas as they searched the room.

"Hey Axel, I'm going to download the pictures," Roxas said as he disappeared through a portal (like I said, he has a digital camera).

"You do that," Axel muttered. He looked through file cabinets, but still didn't find anything.

God, where can it be? He thought as he searched the desk. He finally found what he was looking for. The address book was lying on it's cover (wonder why). Axel picked it up and looked at it.

"Ah! My eyes!" he yelled as he threw it across the room, where it landed face up. On the cover was…

Barney! Muwhahahahahahaha!

Ten minutes later, Roxas came back to find Axel sitting under the desk, sucking his thumb.

"What are you…?"

"Barney's gonna eat me!" Axel yelled, still sucking his thumb.

"What?" Roxas asked, really confused.

Axel nervously pointed to the address book on floor, near the other side of the room.

Roxa walked over to it and picked it up. He looked at it, cleared his throat, and did something unspeakable.

He began to sing.

"I love you, you love me, we're a happy family, with a great big hug and a kiss from me to-"

Axel got up, took the book away from Roxas, and said, "Never, do you hear me? Never do that again. You're scaring me!"

"Fine. But why don't you like Barney?" Roxas asked as he took the book back and began looking through it.

"That's none of your business."

Roxas flipped over the pages until he found what he was looking for. "Eh, eh. Found it. How about we fax her the pictures?"

"Why not?" Axel said, holding back his laughter.

> > > > > > > > > >

An hour later, they were sitting in the living room laughing at the evil deed they had just done. They were sitting on the sofa, feet propped up on the coffee table.

"I can't wait to see the look on Xemnas's face when his girlfriend calls him tonight!" Roxas laughed, reaching for his sour starbursts.

Axel saw him and took the starbursts away. "And what do you think you're doing?"

"Eating candy."

"That's the last thing you need. I've seen how you act when you eat sugar, and it's not pretty," Axel said as he started eating them.

"But, but," Roxas said as Zexion entered the room.

"Why if it isn't The Cloaked Schemer. What do you what?" Axel asked as he ate three starbursts at once, with Roxas still pleading for his candy to come back to him.

"Some of the Organization members are in the kitchen spying on Xemnas and his girlfriend. By what I heard, she's pretty mad. Something's telling me that you two are behind it."

"His girlfriend is here?" Axel asked.

Zexion sighed. "Just come and see."

They followed him into the kitchen, where Xigbar, Xaldin, Luxord, and Demyx were listening to whatever was going on out in the hall.

A women's voice was heard, sounding really pissed. "I come home from work to find these pictures coming out of my fax machine-"

"But sweetie, it's not what you think-" Xemnas said, close to crying.

"We had a deal. If you were good for a month, I would marry you."

Now Xemnas was on his knees. "Please give me another chance!" he said as he kissed her feet.

"Never!" She raised her fist and punched the living daylights out of Xemnas, who fell backward with a black eye.

She stormed out, slamming the door behind her. Out of nowhere, Saix appeared dressed like a flower girl (with makeup on!) and ran circles around Xemnas, throwing flowers down on his unconscious body. Then he started to sing:

"Pray to the dead and the dead will pray for you!" Dun dun da da dun da da da da da da! Sing to the dead and the dead will sing to you! Dun dun da da dun da da da da da da!"

Behind him, Luxord appeared with a steel baseball bat in his hands. He lifted it up, and hit Saix on the head with it.

"Twinkle, twinkle, little star…" was the last thing Saix said as both he and Xemnas drifted off to la-la land.

"No more Vodka for you." Luxord muttered as saw the Organization members in the kitchen. He took out his car keys and pointed to the door. "To the Organization bus. We're going for a little ride."

> > > > > > > > > >

The 'little ride' turned out to be a trip to the local hospital, where they dropped Xemnas off so his black eye could heal. Then they went to the nut house and left Saix there.

"Man, we should have brought him here months ago," Axel said as they watched the men in white drag Saix away.

Luxord started the bus, and they began their way back to the castle.

> > > > > > > > > >

Without the Superior around, the castle turned into a living hell.

When they had come back, they all ran out of the bus, screaming and hollering like morons.

Roxas ran all the way to the kitchen, hoping to eat some junk food before Axel confiscated it from him and ate it himself.

"Ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh," Roxas said as he saw a pile of candy on the table.

Ten minutes later he ate three bags of sour starbursts, one bag of really spicy chips, a jumbo bag of sour skittles, and four bags of sour patch kids.

As he finished, he went to the window and looked out.

"I have an idea!"

> > > > > > > > > >

Axel walked down a deserted hallway with a bag in one hand, and an iPod in the other. The song that was playing was "The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny", which Roxas had downloaded for Axel since he liked it so much.

"Old Godzilla was hopping around, Tokyo City like a big playground,

when suddenly Batman burst from the shade, and hit Godzilla with a Bat grenade,

Godzilla got pissed and began to attack, but didn't expect to be blocked by Shaq,"

He reached for his bag a pulled out a bottle of spray paint, shook it, and sprayed it on the wall in front of him.He took more out, and starting making something on the wall.

"who proceeded to open up a can of Shaq Fu, when Aaron Carter came out of the blue,

and he started beating up Shaquille O'Neal, then they both got flattened by the Batmobile,

but before it could back it back to the Batcave, Abraham Lincoln popped out of his grave,

and took out an AK47 out from under his hat, and blew Batman away with a rat-a-tat-tat,"

Axel put away the spray paint cans and stepped back to admire his masterpiece. It said:

Xemnas sucks and I rock! Xigbar was here dudes!

Wish Roxas could see this, he though, framing people is so much fun!

He shut his iPod off and starting walking away, but not before Roxas showed up, looking like he was attacked by cute, fuzzy, and adorable forest creatures, who were really EVIL creatures trying to take over the world! Muwhahahahaha!

"What happened to you? Did Larxene mug you or something?" he asked.

Roxas stared at him, eyes twitching, "Candy…sugar…yummy."

"You didn't…" Axel asked, but he already knew the answer. Roxas had eaten candy, which had sugar. And that was a no-no. The last time Roxas had sugar, he took one of Axel's chakrams, ran all around the castle, set fire to Marluxia's plants, blew up Larxene's voodoo doll collection, messed up one of Vexen's experiments, burned half of Zexion's books, stole Demyx's hair gell, Luxord's favorite card deck, and Saix's Vodka. He also made a bombfire in the backyard.

That made Axel cry tears of joy, seeing the beautiful fire and all it's glory. But Demyx put it out. Xemnas had also told Axel to control Roxas during his sugar rushs. But he had been so happy about his lastest scheme that he completely forgot about Roxas's sugar problem.

"You'll never guess what I did," Roxas said.

"What?" Axel asked, afraid to know.

"I used Luxord's betting munny to rent a helicopter. I mean, you should see how much munny that guy has! Like, a million munny!"

Axel's jaw dropped. "One, you used Luxord's betting munny! He's going to kill you! Two, why in the name of Kingdom Hearts did you rent a helicopter?"

Roxas smiled like a crackpot. "So we could jump out of it and kill ourselves."

"Why woul- wait one second. You might have something there." Axel said.

"Really? Wow, I'm smart!" Roxas yelled, jumping up and down.

Axel sighed. "The people I surround myself with…"

With that, Axel followed Roxas outside to where the helicopter was.

> > > > > > > > > >

It wasn't as funny as the first chapter, but I hope you liked it. Read and Review!