They call her Human Torch! Chapter 31
Morning
Eventually I finally finished cooking. We were able to sit down and eat without too many awkward pauses but it made me feel really good when Tony, Logan, and now Steve, finished off 3 servings, though Steve's servings were practically double what Tony's servings were. There wasn't much to talk about since we had our mouths stuffed but as soon as we finished, everyone rushed around to clean up the kitchen (the one thing I did let them help with) and afterwords they hurried to get ready. I left a note stuck on the hallway so if Bruce woke up, the note would be the first thing he saw when he opened the door. I had a bag with me in the cab and made sure it had one of my suits in it. My clothes right now were treated with the solution but if we would be helping to lift things and clean up then my clothes could get ripped and I would have to change. We had called 2 cabs to take all of us over and as soon as we got near the finance district, we could both see and hear the crowds of people. There were news vans of course only filming but not doing anything, and on the opposite side there was lines of people waiting to check in and start helping with the clean up. We looked to the side and saw vans and cars with Shields logo on it so instead of checking in, we went straight through. I was glad when no one stopped us but wondered why they kept staring like us being here was the biggest shock.
"Glad to see you here Agent."
We turned and saw Phil coming out of a car. I smiled and went to hug him, glad to see he was okay and no longer under Loki's spell.
"Phil, what are you doing here? You should be home resting."
"Not quite yet. I've only been conscious 2 hours and there is too much to do before I can sleep peacefully."
"How did they get you to come back?"
He grimaces and rubs the back of his head.
"Oh."
"Yeah, not so fun. Fury will want to talk to you all. Specifically you Bella, there have been some concerns..."
I Knew by the look on his face that there was more going on and he wasn't at liberty to say in front of everyone.
"Phil? Take me to Fury. I'll get it over with now."
He nodded and led us a couple blocks in where we were out of sight from the crowds. There were Agents everywhere, gathering vans full of Chitauri pieces.
"Going ahead with usual protocol?"
"Yes, we don't want this tech to fall in the hands of others, especially if we ourselves don't know how it works."
That was one thing I actually agreed on but still that didn't mean I wanted SHIELD to keep them. We saw Fury and Agent Hill standing to the side barking out orders. They too look surprised to see us.
"We thought you would be resting."
"There's too much work to do."
"We have teams set out to start the clean up, you don't have to worry about that."
"No Fury, we are here to do actual 'clean up' I know you guys are taking all the Chitauri parts you can find and all evidence of battle with you but there are people's livelihoods that were destroyed, a homeless shelter that is needed urgently, many buildings threatening to fall over from floors that were destroyed, leaving them uneven. Whatever we need to talk over we can do it now so we can all get to work on this."
He nodded after a minute of looking me over. Tony made to follow us but I put a hand of his shoulder and shook my head. The two of us walked until we ducked into a lobby of a destroyed building.
"I'm not going to beat around the bush. Why are you so bothered to see us here and why does Phil look so worried?"
"I don't see you as a threat Bella."
"Who does?"
"The World Security Council. They never gave me permission to make you an Agent. In fact, they were against the Avenger Initiative. I kept going on with my plans without their knowledge but when you disappeared in New Mexico, they visited our office and learned you had been with SHIELD for a long time and that you were put in our files as an Avenger, so they learned that I kept going with the initiative after they shut it down and they felt threatened that you knew all of our protocols. You were placed on the threat list along with everyone who lives with you."
"Excuse me?"
"When news of your return was broadcast, they-"
"No, no, I want to know why my family, my daughter, was placed on a threat list. Nick you have spent holiday's with us. You have seen a side of us that no one has and the same goes for us with you. We don't just consider you Director of SHIELD! How could you put Kitty and Piotr's name on that list? They are just students!"
"I'm not the only one who has access to that list. It was done before I was notified. I do not consider you a threat, I am not the enemy here. I made a mistake with the Tesseract, I can admit that. When you came back however, you came back from another planet, one full of aliens. You suddenly knew all about their history and had joined alliances with their army. They wanted you locked up and experimented on but I couldn't do that to you. I didn't want to. I thought I could calm them down if I convinced you to give a sample of your blood to prove to them that you were still you and not under someone else's control. They were ready to pull SHIELD funding and bring in another government branch to come get you."
I felt my eyes begin to water as I looked away from him.
"I'm still me."
"I know that now and when I first saw you I had to believe it but they didn't. Not until footage of you fighting the Chitauri aired on the news. They backed off but then you went and sent the Tesseract with the enemy."
"Thor is not the enemy! His people fought for us once, they could easily take us over but they don't!"
"They know we are friendly with Thor but he took a very powerful weapon that could destroy our planet, they are obviously not okay with that."
"Look what happened last time a clueless human had his hands on it! It will be locked away with guards protecting it 24/7. It was the right call, it came from space, it should stay there."
"I agree. I will say it again, I am not the enemy here Bella."
I sighed and paced for a moment before running my hand through my hair.
"So what is it going to take? What do I need to do to take their names off the list?"
"I don't know."
"You do. There is always a but, a maybe, a price. Is Steve's name on the list too now that he is living with us? Because if it is then that is not fair."
"It's not. I didn't know he was living there, I'm glad you will help him through this transition. Look Bella, I will speak to the council but, I don't know what kind of thing they could ask of you."
"I'm not willing to give them DNA, I can maybe test myself and give them a general overview of my health? Something that shows what it could do? I don't know Fury, talk to them, get back to me but I want my daughter's name off."
Just then Logan came running into the building with a glare and his claws out.
"I will not let you give them your blood Bella, not in a vial and not on paper!"
The rest of the family came running after him and looked around frantically, probably not knowing why Logan took off so suddenly. I sighed and mentally kicked myself for not remembering that Logan's nosy ass would be listening.
"What is going on?"
"Nothing is go-"
"She is trying to make a deal, her blood in exchange for our names off some threat list!"
"That's not going to happen. And how nice by the way! We save the city and our names are put on threat lists. Wow Fury, new low."
"Now hold on, it was not my decision."
"No of course not!"
"Tony, Logan stop! Just everyone stop!"
This started off as such a good day…
"Fury, we are good, I don't care what you did before, this is your clean slate as far as I am concerned. I want to know from now on everything that has to do with me and my family. I want you to talk to the council and let me know what they want. If they want nothing then I expect some type of heads up if someone is coming for me.-"
"What?!"
I ignored the exclaims made by the family and kept speaking.
"I want you to be honest with me from now on and you will have my cooperation, even if I am not happy with something, I will talk it out with you directly. Understood?"
He smirked and nodded.
"Yes ma'am."
"Two more things. I want Steve's things delivered to my place, and I do mean all things. If he had a shoe when he was 3 that is in a museum then I want it, if one of his shirts are on display somewhere, I want it. I don't care if they are not on sale, you have hundreds of Agents who know how to get in and out of places. I want his social security card, I want all his papers and certificates straightened out and taken care of. He can't exactly go out and get a job at a grocery store so he, as a senior citizen and veteran, deserves a stipend. I could have my lawyers deal with all this or..."
"I can have one of my hundreds of Agents do it?"
"Exactly."
He nodded at me and I did the same back before moving to leave the building. I noticed the family had all frozen in place and was watching me with shock.
"What?"
"Since when are you assertive?"
"Oh trust me, I can be a real bitch when I want to. Come on, It's midday and we haven't done squat."
Feeling better about the turn of events, I strode out and walked passed all the Agents, straight to the homeless shelter. Damn right this bitch is back!
Steve looked on with concern as Bella walked off with Director Fury, he didn't know if he trusted that man and it was clear that Stark didn't. One of the Agents, Hill? I think her name was, tried to make friendly conversation with Kitty but it was clear she wasn't interested. Stark stood with his arms crossed making it clear he was not moving and Logan moved passed me towards where Bella had walked off to. The Agent saw him and left Kitty's side quickly.
"Excuse me! You can't go back there."
Logan swung around to her and glared menacingly and he stomped over to be in her face.
"Say's you? If I want to go somewhere, ya have no right to tell me where I can an' can't go so think again."
I felt the color leave my face when I saw what Bella had meant when she said claws. He balled up his hands and metal claws came out of them. She moved back and glared at him but the fear was clear in her eyes as she backed off and stormed towards another car. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Natasha smirk. Isn't that Agent someone she works with? Why would she be happy? She breathed out and looked down before putting a blank look on her face again. She looked back up and saw me staring so she raised her eyebrow and I just shook my head. Logan turned and walked a few steps closer to where Bella and Fury turned before finding a bench and sitting on it while tilting his head. I remembered what Bella said about advanced hearing so he must have gotten close enough to hear their conversation. We moved closer to him as a group but he put his hand up when we got to him.
"One of ya makes a sound and I'll kick ya off the street!"
Stark smirked and sat next to him but no one dared open their mouths. They all watched him carefully and saw his face grow angrier and angrier until he stood up to pace and his claws fully came out, they were really long. He paced for a full minute before he let out a growl and took off. We stood up surprised but then took off after him. Fury and Bella were leaning calmly in the first floor of a building while Logan looked between them in anger. Stark looked on in confusion but asked what was going on when no danger was apparent.
"She is trying to make a deal, her blood in exchange for our names off some threat list."
We all glared at Fury for putting her in that position and while Stark exchanged words with Fury, I stared at Bella, watching for what she could be thinking. She had an eerie calm about her that seemed almost dangerous but she still looked beautiful.
"Tony, Logan stop! Just everyone stop."
She sighed and spoke directly to Fury about him warning her if someone was coming for her. Coming for her? Was she in danger? I felt a strange heaviness in my chest at the thought. Logan and Stark exclaimed angrily while Pepper and Kitty shouted out in panic. Fury nodded and smirked at something she asked but everything seemed to grow quiet as she started demanding my things. A shoe? Why would my shoe be in a museum? I started to smile as she asked for all my documents and the things I had owned to be sent to her apartment. Senior citizen? I guess technically I am.. but I do not need to be paid by anyone, not if I am not doing anything. Still, I really appreciated that she was taking care of all this for me, I had wondered about my papers but didn't know what the first step even was to take care of it. She wasn't mad anymore but she still had a slight glare in her eye and sway to her hips as she turned to leave. I looked down and saw my erection begin to tent my pants. What is wrong with me? I'm getting aroused because of her walk and the way she was talking?
She stopped and looked back at us, only to notice that we were all staring at her silently. I was suddenly glad that I was standing behind everyone and that Bella could not see my problem.
"What?"
Stark looked at her and lifted an eyebrow.
"Since when are you assertive?"
"Oh trust me, I can be a real bitch when I want to. Come on, It's midday and we haven't done squat."
She marched out the door and I had to smile after her, she is a strong woman and I was glad she was taking the lead on catching me up on everything I have missed. Stark turned to me and laughed.
"Well I see all of you is crushing on her. Can't blame you after that little show though."
His tone of voice must have drawn attention from everyone because as a whole they all turned and looked straight down. I stepped back and felt my face heat up under their stares.
"Oh my god you like my mom?!"
"Kitty! Leave him alone. Though, thinking on it, you two wouldn't be a bad match... and it does seem she likes older men so you are in luck!"
"Pepper, you are going to scare him away."
"Alright alright, back off an' leave the kid alone."
"Kid? Just how old are you Logan?"
"Way older than World War 2 buddy."
"Wait, if you marry my mom, you would be like my step dad..."
Everyone froze and turned to look at me but I just smiled softly at her and felt a warmth spread through my chest at the thought of being a dad. It was a nice idea. Still, their stares were getting me nervous.
"Um, we aren't, we just met and, we don't really know each other so.. I mean I'm not saying I don't like your mother but-"
Logan patted my back firmly and turned to Kitty.
"Leave him alone, he doesn't even know which way is up yet so back off and don't none of ya bring this up in front of Bella, leave their personal, private lives and let 'em figure it out on their own."
He nodded at me and I nodded thankfully back while he rounded them up and led them out to where Bella had walked off to. I followed slowly after them but Fury's voice stopped me. I had forgotten he was still there.
"You know now they will push you both together as much as they can right? That was them taking you into their family."
I nodded at him before walking out but felt a smile take over my face at his words. I had sat back and watched them interact as a family this morning and having the chance to be a part of that would be the best that I could ask for from this nightmare that I woke up to. I smiled all the way to the shelter that had gotten destroyed and laughed when I saw Bella lining everyone up and giving each of them orders.
"Steve, you can work with Piotr to help everyone lift heavy things."
I nodded and turned to the kid in time to see him take off his shirt and close his eyes, he took a deep breath and seemed to relax as he turned to metal right in front of me.
"What?"
Bella giggled softly as she heard my whisper. She leaned close to me and spoke so only I could hear.
"He goes to school with Kitty, mutant school remember?"
I nodded but kept silent. It was one thing to know someone was a mutant and another to see a transformation happen right before your eyes. She smiled at me kindly once more before turning to go with Stark and getting to work on redesigning a layout for this place. After doing a walk through they found it had back rooms for an unused soup kitchen and plenty of rooms for at least 100 bunk beds but only 25 of them were being used.
"You think they were understaffed or maybe lacked funds?"
"Probably both. We can keep cleaning up while I get my people to reach out to whoever owns this space."
"If it's a funding problem then I can help cover the cost of the remodel."
"Yeah and I can supply the funds for the kitchen and new beds. We can spread word for more volunteers or staff, however this place works."
"Well let's talk to the owner first and see what this place brings to them, if he is not using it properly then we could maybe-"
"Buy it out from under him? Yeah that's what I was thinking."
"Let's not assume anything yet."
"No, not yet."
They continued to throw ideas back and forth and finish each others sentences until they got word that the owner of the space rented it out and didn't care what went on as long as he got his rent money. They contacted the person who rented the place out and were able to schedule a meeting with her in 1 hour. We worked easily to clear stuff out and when the garbage pile got too big, Bella would just take it outside and burn it until there was nothing but a tiny pile of ash left. 2 hours passed and the place was looking better. It was still too badly destroyed but the furniture made trash was out of the way and only some walls were left of the place. Good thing was that the kitchen was all the way in the back and was still intact.
"Hello?"
I turned towards the entrance and saw an older black woman standing timidly by the hole that was once the doors.
"Can I help you ma'am?"
"Well, I think so, my name is Maya Green. I rent this spot out and had an appointment here an hour ago?"
"Right, yes ma'am, we didn't think you would show up."
"I'm terribly sorry. Traffic was no good and police is not letting anyone but owners of buildings pass the line. I had to register as a volunteer and show proof that I pay rent here."
I started to speak but stopped when I saw Bella walking in from the back with Tony.
"Mrs. Green?"
"That is me Ms."
"Hi, my name is Bella, this is Tony and you have already met Steve. It's a pleasure to meet you, though I regret that it is under these circumstances."
She walked right up to her with a warm and welcoming smile as she shook the shy woman's hand. I smiled and was in awe of how welcoming she was with others and how much her attitude drew people in. Stark smiled slyly my way and lightly kicked my shin to get my attention off Bella.
"Mrs. Green, Tony Stark. Good to meet you. We called you here because we needed to get the ball rolling on this place, we called the owner but frankly, he is an idiot. We wanted to know what type of thing you do here? It's a homeless shelter but how do you get money for the rent?"
Bella took my arm silently and led me to the back so I could help her get some chairs for them to sit.
"You are welcome to sit in on this too Steve. You don't have to go to the back with everyone else. They are just sweeping the back rooms I think."
I nodded and thanked her before getting an extra chair for myself. Once every one was sitting, Mrs. Green began speaking about her grandmothers family being slaves and were always helped to escape the south by people who opened their homes to them. She had tried to help other people all her life in return of good karma.
"My husband and I were never able to have kids so we became foster parents for a long time but when he passed away, I began to help cook for soup kitchens and volunteer for homeless shelters, I saw the way some staff treated and talked down to some of them and the conditions of the places they had to sleep sometimes. I gathered what I could to begin renting out this place and got the help from community lawyers to inform me of what I needed to do. The people that come here are very good, we kept open by whatever they could give and donations but they couldn't give much since we don't have enough for the kitchen to be open, they had to save money to buy food somewhere. I always made sure the few rooms I had open were clean though."
Bella and Tony exchanged glances throughout her story but this last time they looked at each other for a while. Having some kind of silent conversation. They nodded at each other and I could only sit back and wonder how they did it. He and Bucky could do that too but it was funny how he could tell what Bucky wanted by a single twitch of an eyebrow, when Bella and Tony did it though, he had no idea what an eyebrow twitch meant. Stark turned and became all business with Mrs. Green.
"Are you still interested in opening this place back up?"
"Oh, it's a nice thought and I am so grateful that you kids have cleaned up the trash but, Mr. Tran won't be okay with paying for the remodel and I do not have enough to restock the place with supplies and furniture. We had a good run but I think it's time I look for somewhere else to start volunteering."
Bella looked to Stark once more and gave him a nod. I saw his lips move as he whispered something her way, not loud enough for anyone else to hear.
"Mrs. Green, if you would be interested, we would like to buy this building from Mr. Tran and remodel this place ourselves. Tony has agreed to pay for the remodel and I would be glad to buy supplies and cots for all the rooms. We would draw up a contract with you to have everything in writing but we would like this place to be used to it's max potential, we understand that is quite a lot of responsibility to put on your shoulders and so, would like to have you hire 6 or 8 employees that can fill in to clean the rooms and the multiple beds in them, security, people that can work in the kitchen, and that don't have a problem washing up shower stalls. Anything you can think of really. If you do not need that many employees that is fine but we would want this place to be running in an organized manner."
Mrs. Green at one point had begun to cry and but was at a loss of words when it came time for her to talk.
"I- Oh, we don't have showers here."
"That would be part of the remodel, we would include that. We only ask that the new wings that would be opened up could have a priority to homeless veterans. You know how there are too many cases that l-"
Bella stopped talking when Mrs. Green broke down crying. Bella looked to Stark and to me with a look of confusion.
"Oh! You- you have- no idea what that means to me! I only have 10 or 11 men that come every night, they give me all the money they can and they help keep this place clean from people looking for a place to keep their needles and drugs. They do so much and they are almost all veterans!"
She cried a little more but composed herself for a moment to keep talking.
"I know their cases, I know how many veterans there are in the streets. Thank you, thank you both. We even have 2 mutants that sometimes come and stay, we welcome them and kick out anyone who discriminates against them. I know what you are and what some people on the news say about mutants but no one who stays here thinks like that."
Bella smiled at her softly and touched her hand.
"Thank you for your words but really this is something that is needed in this community and what you do is so great. We are just glad that we can help rebuild this place. Can we get your proper contact information?"
"Of course! Oh, they will be so happy to hear about the remodel. Do you know if it will be done by Christmas? It would be such a good present for them."
"Of course, you have my word that it will be done by Thanksgiving even."
The woman got up and started crying silently again as she hugged all 3 of us and left.
"That was uncomfortable.."
"Tony! She got emotional is all."
"Yeah, a little too much but she seemed like a decent woman."
"Yeah, she does. What do you think Steve?"
"Uh, she was certainly nice. I just don't understand what she meant when she said, and you said, that a lot of veterans are homeless? Why is that?"
Stark sighed and put his hands up.
"Before you get her started, lets wait until we get home yeah? There's not much else we can do today if we are not owners so let's just go so I can get started on negotiating with this Mr. Tran."
Bella glared playfully his way before winking at me and going to the back to get everyone.
I sent Kitty, Piotr, Tony, and Logan off home in one cab while we took another one to the closest mall with Steve and Pepper. Natasha had stayed behind with Phil and said she would meet up with us for dinner and would bring Phil with her. He apparently was looking forward to dinner with Captain America.
"Alright Steve, lets get you some nice clothes."
"You know I appreciate it Bella, and I'm thankful that you came along to help too Pepper but you don't need to buy me clothes, really I don't want you to spend money on me when I couldn't pay you back."
I looked to him seriously and in that moment, he reminded me of what I use to be like with Alice.
"Steve, I always hated to try on clothes and hated getting presents from people so I can understand that you may be uncomfortable. If you really want to go home, we can, but you really do need this and I hope you let me do this for you. It's not a waste of money, it's a necessity."
Pepper nodded at him and steered him towards the men's department.
"If it makes you feel better, we promise not to buy any expensive clothes that are super pricey just because they are a big brand name okay?"
He looked to both of us a little lost but gave a small smile and nodded.
"Great! Alright, we need to get you basic stuff so underwear first. Briefs or boxers?"
"Or boxer briefs?"
His face flamed up and he averted his eyes from our faces. He doesn't even know what he got into.
"Come on, we'll just get you some of each and you can see what you like best. We can do the same thing with undershirts."
2 hours later we were finally leaving the store. We actually finished quite fast with Steve but Pepper started shopping for herself and made me start trying on 3 dresses and after torturing Steve with making him try on stuff, he was more than happy to encourage Pepper while smirking at me. Sexy bastard. I was leaving with 2 new hot dresses with lace accents and a- line fittings. Once was dark blue and the other was an emerald green. And they had pockets! How fucking amazing was that?!
For Steve we got Work out clothes like shorts and track pants with 2 pairs of work out shoes. 1 suit, 2 ties. (Just in case.) 1 pair of dress shoes, 2 pairs of casual shoes, Belts, over 10 dress shirts in different fittings, colors, and fabrics. 4 pairs of well fitting jeans, 2 pairs of slacks, 5 button up collared sport shirts, 2 solid polo shirts, 6 sweaters, 15 undershirts, 2 sport jackets, a Blouson jacket, Denim jacket, then because I though he looked hot, a brown Racer jacket. Finally, the only thing he actually asked to get was a dark gray Wool Car Jacket.
"I never have to do that again right?"
I laughed but patted his back and kept walking.
"Right?!"
"These clothes won't last forever but spending 2 hours in a store just trying stuff on? No, you never have to do that again."
He nodded looking relieved. I heard his and Pepper's stomachs rumble and realized I was starving too.
"You guys wanna go home now? I'm pretty hungry and I'm sure everyone else is too. Plus, the store said they would deliver all the clothes in less than an hour."
They readily agreed and we hopped into the first cab we spotted.
"What should I make for dinner? Something fast I think."
I laughed as they both nodded with enthusiasm.
"Hm, maybe I can help you make your lasagna? It's going to be cold tonight and that would go well with a red Cabernet."
"Ooh yea that sounds good. You think I have time to make a tiramisu?"
Steve's eyes widened and his stomach growled once again, so it was clear he knew what that was and wanted some. We stayed silent in the car the rest of the way home but kept yawning once in a while. I knew all the events of yesterday would have us in a permanent state of exhaustion for 1 week or 2. I couldn't imagine what Thor must be going through, put in the middle of his brother and his father straight after the fight yesterday. Then repairing the Bifrost and part of the rainbow bridge will take a lot of energy too I think.
"Bella?"
I snapped out of my thinking and looked to Steve and Pepper, realizing we were in front of the building and they were out of the car already.
"Sorry."
I got out of the car and paid the driver before turning to walk with them back inside. It was great to be home but I found myself getting lost in thought for the rest of the day, found my body moving automatically while I cooked. I kept thinking about the clean air in the mountains of Asgard, the beauty in the architecture, and the overall magic of being in another realm, surrounded by a new history and culture that I couldn't travel to on earth. I had learned how hard it had been for Tony, for Kitty, for my family, how different life had been without me here and I felt almost guilt for missing Asgard. I missed them when I was there and cried over them but in between, I learned new things with Sif, I had amazing adventures, I had fun. I had fun while they were here missing me. Was it wrong to miss it then? I would never choose to go back and stay there. Visit? Yes, move there by myself? No. So why was I wasting time feeling guilt over something that is not even an issue?… I mean, I want to be there now, I want to help fight off the marauders! I wish I could use the Bifrost as a warrior with them and storm into a realm to battle against them. It was the type of battles you saw in movies. What we did yesterday was very tactical and it was to save the damn world from being taken over but I longed for the types of battles in Asgardian history books, the types of battles that Jasper and Peter told me about from their times in the vampire wars. Was that dark? Logan had told me once that side effects from his blood would be that my instincts would be heightened and more primal. Logan's blood mixed with the vampire venom in my system from Jame's bite, all that plus the already heightened senses from the cosmic exposure… Just how primal are my instincts? Do they overpower my human ones?
"BELLA!"
I flinched for a moment and gasped as flames erupted throughout my whole body.
"Shit! Sorry, Sorry!"
I turned and saw everyone standing there just staring at me but all I could do was put my head in my hands and sigh in exasperation. What is wrong with my control lately?! I was good before I left! Even in Asgard I never struggled with it! I focused on pulling the flames away from my face but since I wasn't wearing any clothes with solution on them, they were all ashes on the ground.
"I'm gonna go get clothes. Excuse me."
I muttered out the words softly but turned to get away quickly. Logan got in my way and crossed his arms while giving me an analyzing glare.
"What is with you? We sat around the kitchen with you all day and you never so much as looked our way. Your senses are off, you are jittery, you are stuck in your head. What is going on?"
He could tell my senses were off, of course I should have thought to go to Logan, he is the only one who had an insider idea as to what is going on.
"I don't know. I was fine yesterday I guess because I was busy, obviously. This morning I was fine too but now, I just, my control is slipping, I'm having trouble keeping it in and I don't know why, my instincts are all over the place and…. I'm just having trouble adjusting to everything again. I'm sorry."
He nodded slowly and took off his leather jacket before draping it over me and zipping it up so no one could see my body.
"Sit down, take a deep breath, and just tell me what you are having trouble with exactly. All those little things are what get you worked up and into a berserker rage."
My head swung up as I looked him in the eyes.
"Berserker? Those rages you go into? That can't happen to me, can it?!"
"It happens to me. We have to assume it can to you. You were thrown in another world, lets start there. What was that like? Peaceful or stressful?"
"Well, at first it was really bad. I just wanted to come home. Then we started hearing rumors about Loki making portals to other realms and thought maybe one of them could be to Midgard, uh- I mean earth- here! We tried portal after portal and it was very stressful when we went through and I was in another planet instead of home, it was disappointing but in between that, I spent my time reading and learning as much as I could. I walked through the mountains and breathed in the air, it is so light, no pollution, no car traffic or city noise.. It was as peaceful as you could imagine… Then I trained with them and we never had to hold back, I guess because they are more durable and stronger than humans and because they have a healing room, it was easier for me to let go of my control. I never had to worry about slipping because nothing ever startled me or angered me. Now I'm back and I feel like I did all those years ago, like.. like my emotions are driving me and ugh, I don't even know how to explain it."
Logan looked to me and sighed almost regretfully.
"When I go into my.. rages, It's because stress or anger is gettin' to me. When I am fighting with someone and I have stress, it gets hard to control it. What you're describing, if I were you, I would have already gone into a rage so that means you will have control of yourself but still.. it's like having an anxiety attack, ya feel the effects slowly creeping up on you, it could last from an hour to days, then when it is over, your control will be back to how you had it before. One thing is for sure though, you need a session with me in the danger room. I know what ya need to take out that aggression and it sure as hell wasn't that sissy fight from yesterday."
I readily agreed but Tony was having none of it.
"Sissy fight?! Buddy if you call that a sissy fight then I sure as hell don't want to go into battle with you."
"She needs to let it out. We have more primal instincts when we are in these stages. What ya guys did yesterday was very controlled. She had to watch for civilians, she was tryin' to watch out to not break any buildings, she had to do multiple things at once. What she needs and wants if a good ole fashion slaughtering. Just look up the legends of where the term 'Berserk' came from. It's a fury that happens durin' battle. It begins with your control slippin' and all the signs she got. When you are in that stage, you cut down everything you are met with, everything an' everyone. No discriminating between friend or foe. When ya wake from it, your head gets dull and your body gets weak. That goes on for 2 or 3 days. We need to get it out of her now before it comes out on it's own and she is out in public where she can hurt someone."
My eyes filled with tears that didn't fall but they were partially there out of fear of hurting someone, fear that we needed to do this and that I would hurt Logan, and also there from anger, I could feel it, feel the need to lash out on him for underestimating my control. I was losing control over him saying I was fucking losing control. How fucked up is that?!
"Look, can we just do this after dinner and after Darcy and Jane get here? I can keep it together a while longer, I know I can."
"Darlin' I'm sorry, this is not something I wanted to pass down to ya."
"It's fine Logan. I just don't know why it's coming out now. I've been 10 times more stressed than I am now and this has never happened before."
"Now ya are stressed and let out some aggression yesterday with the fighting but constantly had to hold back so it actually built more stress on yourself, your body is no longer use to holding back after the passed 8 months in a place that suited your fire."
I sighed and rolled my eyes because damn, that made perfect sense and it pissed me the fuck off that it did. My fingertips jolted and let out sparks as the oven timer went off.
Fucking slipping control!
They looked at me with concern and sadness and I just had to take a deep breath to not tell them to fuck off. They are my family, I love them, they are just concerned for me right now. I had to repeat that in my head 3 times until I calmed down and was excused long enough to get dressed and come back down to serve all the food right on time for Phil and Nat to get here.
Needless to say, dinner was slightly awkward for the first 5 minutes or so, especially since 2 of our guests didn't know what was gong on but Phil didn't really mind it, he was just asking Steve if he enjoyed the food and was watching him eat in awe. Kitty was able to diffuse it slightly when she started asking questions.
"So, um I know you said you wanted to wait to tell us the whole story when we are all here but, what did you do? Like what was it like sleeping in another planet? Do they have beds just like we do and pluming for toilets and showers like us?"
"Oh yeah, they did have all of that but they also have springs and lakes. A lot of people use those because they believe it cleanses them both physically and spiritually. I just used the bathroom in my room, that was no normal bathroom though, the tub was like a small pool and the size was ridiculous."
"So you got your own room? Did someone let you stay at their house?"
"Well I got stuck there because of Loki so the King proclaimed me as a royal guest for my stay so I stayed in the palace and got a room."
"You stayed in a castle?! That is awesome! What did it look like?"
I smiled at her enthusiasm.
"Honestly I can't properly describe it. It was all gold, everything, the walls, the throne room, even the guards armor. You know the gold castle that comes out in the little mermaid? Picture that, but bigger and grander."
"Wow."
"Yeah. It was hard in the beginning because, for them, science and magic is the same thing. Magic to us is a non reality but I witnessed it everyday there, it flows through all the halls and city corridors. I would really like to ask permission for you guys to see it one day. Of course only when I know for sure that the Bifrost is repaired. The only thing that really sucked about the place was the food. It really sucks."
Tony smirked in a way that made me know he was going to say something sarcastic but Jarvis interrupted him.
'The elevator is being called down by Ms. Lewis and Ms. Foster. Shall I allow the action Bella?'
"Of course! Thank you Jarvis."
I got up quickly and made my way to the elevator with everyone following after a moment. As soon as the doors opened I saw Darcy's face for a second before it blurred and I found myself being tackled to the floor in one of her hugs. She half laughed and half cried as she hugged me.
"You bitch! You go and hop in a free ride to Asgard with a bunch of hot dudes and you leave me here alone with Jane!"
I laughed and cried with her as her voice cracked with her tears.
"Aww I'm sorry Darcy!"
She pulled back and smacked her lips on mine for a moment, leaving me stunned. She laughed and got off me before helping me up. Everyone else was equally shocked but Jane recovered first and came to hug me tight.
"I'm so glad you are back! We tried, I looked for signs but I couldn't find anything to indicate if you were coming back and then we get called to another thing which was so fake by the way!"
She turned to glare at Phil, who had the decency to look guilty.
"So? What was it like? Did you have any hot warrior sex with any of those guys? Are space guys hotter or was it just the group that came with Thor? Where is he anyway?"
"Darcy! Shut up!"
My face started smoking but from the lack or control I had, my cheeks actually let out some sparks. I saw Pepper and Nat smirking, Kitty and Piotr looked grossed out, Logan and Tony just looked at Steve, who actually looked upset? I wonder why? Did Tony tell him something I didn't hear?
"Don't tell me to shut up, It's a valid question! You had to get off somehow, I doubt there's toys in space! Are there?"
"Eww! That is so gross Aunt Darcy!"
She laughed and moved to hug Kitty.
"I haven't seen you in forever munchkin. You look taller. Are you over your bitchy stage?"
Kitty looked to me overwhelmed by Darcy's personality but smiled and nodded as she hugged her back.
"I smell your delicious food! We've been living off of cup of noodles and frozen meals the past 8 months you know."
I laughed and led her to the dining room where I served 2 more plates and they sat down. Jane looked around and looked to me with a look in her eye.
"So, where is Thor?"
"Um, well he really wanted to talk to you but it was important that he got Loki back to Asgard immediately. He did say that as soon as the Bifrost was fixed, this would be the first place he came."
She looked crestfallen as she looked down at her plate.
"Really Jane, he did want to see you. I asked him if he wanted me to give you a message and he said no, that he wanted to talk to you in person. That's a good sign right? It's just that he needed to take Loki to the King, that was his main mission and task that he was given."
She didn't look as upset but still a little disappointed. Darcy frowned, looking at Jane's upset posture.
"Well, he must be a stupid King then to not let his son do whatever he wants."
It was instinctual for me to huff is anger. I forgot where I was for a moment and only thought about the punishment for talking like that about the King. They all turned to look at me and I could see Logan tense up, waiting for me to lose it.
"Darcy, you cannot say that. He is a great King, of course Thor wanted to talk to Jane but the courts duties come before yourself always."
Okay, I could hear myself….
"Sorry, that was just repeated to me so many times that now it's ingrained in my head."
"What happens if someone speaks against him?"
"Guards are to bring him or her into the throne room and analyze the situation, that is how imprisonment time or punishment is estimated."
"Dang."
We went back to eating but I could see that they still had plenty of questions about my time there.
"We can meet up tomorrow if you guys want. I know you want me to clear things up but I didn't want to repeat things over and over. Maybe all of us along with Aunt May and Peter, hopefully Bruce will be up by tomorrow morning, then I can try to answer everything you guys got."
They nodded relieved that I was not going to keep avoiding the conversation. Logan stared at me and would turn to look at Steve before turning back to me. It annoyed me as much as it confused me but then Steve kept looking to me too and I found that I didn't mind it from him. God I couldn't wait for them to finish eating! I needed that danger room session now!
