Alright! Here's the next one! D It's gonna be a good one! Of course, it's random and AN or whatever it's called. Remember, these fics are a collection – they don't fit together into a story or whatever! So, enjoy, and keep in mind these are random and pointless.
One last thing. Thank you guys so much! D Please forgive me if this one isn't as random and funny as the first – it's a hard thing to top! xD
Disclaimer: You
know, this thing just depresses me…. –sigh- I don't own
Fullmetal Alchemist or any of its characters –sob-. But I do own me
and my family.
4:36 P.M. Friday, August 18. Napa California. A street, 5555555 (Not a real address. If it is, I apologize. O.o But, alas, I'm not stupid enough to put my REAL address xD). Misty's room.
"Misty, dammit! Get up! We're going to the Rockbell's today!" Anna, the 12-year-old sister of the teenager she was shaking.
"Mrrr…." Misty, the 13-year-old older sister of the girl shaking her (A/N: xD), said. Anna glared.
"You stay up 'till eight writing those damned fanfics and talking to all your friends on the computer and sleep 'till five! You. Have. Issues…. You know, school's gonna be hell this year for you!" Anna snapped.
"Lemme 'lone…" Misty mumbled. Anna sighed.
"What I do for you people…" she grabbed the cold glass of water Misty had gotten before going to bed. Water was on the glass itself, and small, melted ice cubes floated in the water. Anna smirked to herself, being the evil little devil from hell she was. "Oops!" She said, dumping the glass of cold water of her sister's blankets. Misty's eyes shot open.
"JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! COLDCOLDCOLDCOLD!" Misty screamed, flying out of her bed, falling on the ground, stumbling up and tripping all over the place, trying to keep her balance while her sister laughed her ass of on the floor.
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!" Anna laughed, holding her stomach on the floor. Misty regained the sanity she had and stood still, holding the side of her light blue pajama shirt out to the side. It had gotten wet from the water seeping through the blanket.
"Damn you, you little demon!" Misty yelled, glaring. Anna regained her composure and stood up, clearing her throat.
"Just shut up and get dressed. Like I said – we're going to the Rockbell's!" Anna said, walking out of the room.
5:23 PM. Friday, August 18. Rockbell Residence.
"Gah! They won't die!" Winry Rockbell yelled, bashing a talking spork with her wrench.
"Hit it harder, Winry!" Pinako snapped, sword fighting with a spork using her pipe.
"I'm trying! But the stupid things must be made with that new plastic made from keyboards!" Winry said, fighting off sporks with her trusty wrench.
"Hey! We're here!" Misty shouted, opening the from door. Misty and Anna's eyes widened.
"..Sporks are attacking? What the…!" Anna said.
"Help!" Winry squeaked. Misty slapped her forehead.
"And I thought I'd get this week off…" Misty mumbled, then shrugged. "Anna… get the blender."
"Yes ma'am!" Anna saluted, the bolted out the door. Misty pulled a guitar out from under her hat (A/N: Crap! I forgot to describe what we look like!...Well, if you read the first chapter, you'll know) and leaped into action!
Once Anna came with the blender, Pinako, Winry, and Misty and broken about half of the dreaded sporks.
"I've got the blender!" Anna yelled.
"Toss it!" Misty shouted. Anna threw the blender. Misty pushed the 'SLO MO' button on the wall and ran in slow motion. She jumped and soared in the air, all in slow motion. She caught the blender and flipped in the air.
DING!
The timer on the slomo button sounded and Misty fell to the ground.
"Ow.." she mumbled. She stood up and held the blender above her head. "BLENDER POWER!" she yelled. Suddenly, there was a loud crash from upstairs in Winry's room.
"What the?" Winry said. Everyone stared at Misty. Misty's eyes were wide and she was still standing and holding the blender over her head.
"…That… wasn't supposed to happen" she said. Everyone ran upstairs.
Once they got upstairs, they were faced with a girl who looked kind of like Misty. She was wearing black jeans, a cameo tank top, her hair was in a ponytail, like Misty's, and she was wearing a cape. Thousands of the dreaded Mexican dog, Chihuahuas, were filling the room.
"Mwuahahahahahahahaaa!" The girl laughed evilly.
"Dude… there's a…. dude, there's a Chihuahua on your head" Misty said. The girl looked up and sure enough, a little Chihuahua was drooling on her head.
"What the..! Aw dammit!" the girl said, yanking the Chihuahua off her head. "Man, I hate these things" she said, dropping it into the sea of canines.
"Dear diary – what the fuck is wrong with the world?" Misty mumbled, scribbling something into a blue cameo book.
"Ahem" the girl said, looking at the group of females. Pinako was spaced out, smoking her pipe, Winry was looking at her fingernails, Anna had her hands in her pockets, moving her head due to the fact she was listening to a MP3 player, and Misty was writing. "Ahem…. Ahem!...Ahem!.. AHEM!... HEY! PEOPLE! EVIL IS UNFOLDING HERE!" the girl yelled. Misty looked up.
".. You're taking over Winry's room with… Chihuahuas…." Misty notified… nothing.
"..Well… yeah." The girl said.
"Yeah, OK. We don't even know your name, ya damn poser! And did you steal those from my closet! I could sear I have clothes just like those!" Misty yelled, pointing.
"I am…FLARE! THE ALMIGHTY!" the girl, knows as Flare, said.
"… you look… like…. Something that isn't all mighty… in my clothes." Misty said.
"Yeah.. notice how she skipped the clothes question?" Anna asked.
"I feel dirty" Misty said, eye twitching. She looked at Flare "You can keep the clothes" she said, waving a careless hand.
"…this is.. really weird… I wish Ed and Al were here" Winry said sadly.
"..Gr… CAN WE GET BACK TO THE EVIL HERE?" Flare yelled.
"Yeah sure whatever" Anna sighed.
"Good…." Flare cleared her throat. "BEWHERE!" she pushed a button on a remote, and a large ray gun cannon thingy came up through the floor and pointed at the three girls and Pinako. "FEAR MY CHIUHAUHA BASED WRATH!" Flare yelled. She pushed the button on the remote again. Flare started laughing manically and… Nothing happened.
"….Uhhhhh…." Misty and Anna mumbled in unison as Flare went on laughing. This evil chick who really isn't very evil opened her eyes. She gradually stopped laughing and fell into silence.
"Wait.." she said. "..Where's the doom?" she asked.
"… My God. Don't you have, like… a therapist to see?" Anna asked.
"Oh shit! I do!" Flare said, looking at her watch. "Bye guys!" she said, turned and ran out the hole in the wall… falling down… onto a fire hydrent… that a Chihuahua was pissing on. Everyone stared in silence for a moment….
"What the hell am I gonna do with all these Chihuahuas?" Winry yelled suddenly.
"WINRYYY! AUNTIE PINAKO! WE'RE BAAACK!" Al, from downstairs, yelled. They walked up to the four girls.
"Hi guys" Misty said, smiling happily.
"ED! KITTIES!" Al yelled, pointing at all of the Chihuahuas.
"Al, those are—.." Ed started. Al jumped into the pile of Chihuahuas
"KITTIEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!" he squeaked happily. (A/N: Yup. He's a tin can. xD) Ed slapped his forehead… with his metal arm.. knocking him out cold. With the sudden weight – all the Chihuahuas, the four women, the two Elric boys and the metal of their bodies – the floor of this one room couldn't take it! The floor crashed through, causing them all the fall into the living room!
The sudden WHACK of all these people falling caused an EARTHQUAKE!
8:56 PM, Friday, August 18. Great Wall Of China.
The earthquake from the Rockbell's house caused the Great Wall Of China to split apart, letting the Mongolians in and eventually leading to China's destruction.
8:56 PM, Friday, August 18, 2006. Rockbell's House's Rubble.
"…My house… is rubble." Pinako said. Pinako was standing on top of Ed, Ed was on top of Al, Al was on top of winry, Winry was on top of Anna, and Anna was on top of Misty who was on top of the Chihuahuas.
"Can't…. breathe…" Misty said, turning blue in the face.
"At least you're not crushed under A SUIT OF ARMOR!" Winry snapped.
"Cram it. I'm crushed under everyone" Misty mumbled.
"You know what? This is fucked up. We're outta here" a Chihuahua said. "Come on, guys". All the Chihuahuas left and everyone fell to the ground.
"OK… Now I really can't breathe" Misty squeaked.
"Well, I can't get down. It's too high up and if I jump from this high I'll break my legs" Pinako said.
12:45 AM, Saturday, 19. Still in that same place.
"I'm tired…. And I dropped my pipe"
"Ewww! Brother's drooling on me!"
"He's still knocked out!"
"Guys! I think Misty just passed out!"
OWARI (or… end.)
Well? How as it? I'm not exactly in the happy spazzo mood. Don't ask why, I'll just start ranting and.. well ,you get the picture.
Alright! I want reviews, people! –twitch- GIMME MAH REVIEWS!... And money! Money's appreciated! D
Oh, and if anyone was offended by the China blowing up thing, I apologize. It was just the most random thing I could think of that wasn't Canada. Canada's too overused. --.
Well! That's it! R&R! OR DIE
I love you all!
- Holy Pompatoes, Batman! Misty.
