Hello all,
Sorry for late update! Short chapter, but I hope you enjoy it. Warning for sadness, I dove deeper into Yoh's past which wasn't happy :(
Thanks for your reviews and time to read my story!
SUMMARY: There is a reason behind Yoh's fear of crossing his family and that's because one particular memory that thought him an important painful lesson. At the same time, we learn more about the work behind the scenes done by the Asakuras.
Chapter 22: The cruel reality
"Here, have some water." Lizzy said concerned as she came closer to Yoh and started to rub his back while her free hand gave him the bottle. "Take deep breaths and try to calm down. It will do her no good if she wakes up finding you like this. Don't squeeze her hand so tight, I won't take her away, no one will. Concentrate on my voice and not on that annoying voice in your head." She instructed him and he quickly moved his hand from around Anna to rub his eyes desperately to make his tears stop.
Lizzy put the bottle down before she moved her free hand on his, gently stopping his rather aggressive motion.
"It's OK to cry. Let it out, keeping it all in won't help, it will still come out later or weeks later. You're just prolonging the inevitable and it will make you feel better although drained. I know you're afraid to wake her up, but at least let the tears flow. Breath. Just listen to my voice, focus on what I say. I'm not calling your family. I don't even have this authority without my boss' permission. So, calm down, look, she's still here, she's safe with you, OK." Lizzy said in a comforting voice before she let go of his hand.
His teary eyes watched her once again with that confusion that baffled her because she couldn't exactly place what confused him. What made him look so stunned at her? He did seem to listen as he let himself cry and accepted the bottle of water she gave him. She moved her hand from his back to give him a light pat on the head that only made the boy shed more tears as a memory came flooding in.
Yoh remembered it was a nice summer day and he was playing out in the garden running around. He was around four years old. His grandfather was smoking on the porch and his mother was hanging out some laundry while his father was once again away on one of his long trips. At least he let him keep his headphones, he liked them.
He had recently started training - he didn't like it. A lot of work and less time to play, so he was grateful for moments like this when he was allowed to spend some time having fun, even if it was just by himself. He always asked his grandfather and mother to join, yet the answer from both was always a serious 'No.' or an apologetic I'm busy, go play by yourself." Not even the ghosts had enough energy or will to play with him, so Yoh learned to play by himself.
One moment he was running around chasing a ladybug, the next he found himself face down on the grass as he tripped. His headphones flew away. He felt pain shot through his knee and he cried for his mother who immediately run his way. She kneeled down to him, ready to take him in her arms to comfort him when an authoritative voice stopped her.
"Keiko, stop! What are you doing? He barely scratched that knee. Heal it for him and leave him be."
"But father, he's only a child." She replied pained one hand already making its way to his wounds to heal them while the other hold him away from her.
"Mummy!" Yoh cried wanting to be held, yet his grandfather approached watching both of them sternly.
"Yes, but he has started his training as a shaman, he needs to toughen up and if you baby him like these, he won't make it through the first year of training. No more hugs and cuddles, he is a growing boy now, isn't it Yoh?"
"Mummy…?" Yoh refused to look at his grandfather and instead stared at his mother pleadingly, arms raised in a silent plea for her hold.
His mother had made his pain subside, yet he still felt like crying from what his grandfather had said - he liked hugs, he wasn't getting a lot of them anyway and now he wasn't allowed anymore?!
"Father, maybe it's too early to…" Keiko tried to reason feeling her heart break for the child and she moved her hands to let him come into her hug, only to get herself nudged by her father's cane who then pushed Yoh further away.
"Keiko!" Yohmei lectured her harshly. "You're only making the situation worse for him. And enough healing, his shaman body also needs to learn to heal those things itself. You just make sure there's nothing too serious that could leave a mark, there will be plenty of other future moments when he will definitely get some."
"Bu…"
"You know Mikihisa will agree with me, so if you have something to say about the way I'm training your son or his father is by staying away, you should bring it up next time he comes visiting. You have a duty as an Asakura and an even bigger one considering…" Yohmei's eyes narrowed, disgust briefly crossing his features, before he continued "…what you brought in this world. So, are you with your family or against your family like Him? Are you going to help Yoh fulfil his destiny or make it harder by being an obstacle in his shaman development? If it's too hard for you, I'm sure your mother wouldn't mind some company for an indefinite period."
"NO!" She cried in horror at the thought of being separated from her only left child, the mere thought making her break down in tears as the memories from that traumatic night came back.
"Then I suggest you put yourself together and do better by Yoh starting by going to make dinner." Yohmei's harsh voice held a definitive tone, ending any further comments.
"Yes, father." Keiko said swallowing her tears and trying to get as far as possible from the scene.
All this time Yoh kept calling her name, sobbing louder and louder from behind his grandfather's pointed cane. Before she left, however, she grabbed Yoh's headphones and gave them to the teary boy. She smiled kindly, still tearing herself and gave Yoh a light pat on the head.
"You'll be fine, now go play and be more careful. I'll go make dinner." She tried to keep her voice steady.
"But mummy…" His eyes begged her to stay and comfort him, yet she turned around and left.
"Yoh, I said something." She looked at him over her shoulder, features hardening briefly before her face softened again and she smiled sadly his way. "Things will work out, you'll see." And with that she entered the house.
"Very good." Yohmei approved nodding before he gave Yoh a shove making him fall on the grass. "You better stay here boy or I'll put you train and miss dinner."
"No, mummy, please, I don't want to train, I don't want to!" Yoh broke down sobbing on the grass. "Come back, please."
Yoh wanted to go chase after her, but he was afraid of his grandfather and his cane, so he stood there in the grass and cried for hours. Yet no one cared or came to comfort him. He missed dinner and didn't care, but the next day he had to train double as much, so in the future he tried to be more careful about missing his meals or disobeying his grandfather especially when it came to training.
That was the last time his mother came close to him or touched him. And that's also when Yoh learned how important is to obey his grandfather whether if he liked it or not. Not listening just made things worse for him or for the people he held dear around him because his grandfather could be rather vengeful.
"Shhh, shhh!" Lizzy tried to calm Yoh down.
She gave his free hand a light reassuring squeeze before she went to grab some tissues. She noticed how he almost got up to get after her, hand reaching back for hers, yet he stopped upon remembering about the girl sleeping on their hands. She came back to give him the tissues before she went back to rubbing his back soothingly. He really seemed like he needed it, yet at the same time, it looked as if it brought him more distress which only made Lizzy confused. Was she doing something wrong?
Unlike his friend who couldn't stand sharing her space, Yoh seemed exactly the opposite. It felt like he didn't mind at all her proximity or her comforting gestures, he even seemed to seek them desperately. Lizzy felt this situation was becoming harder to manage just professionally and it was starting to affect her personally because truth to be told, she felt really sorry for him.
She decided the most important thing was to calm him down and that meant making a decision. She also needed to take some air and maybe even give him some space to process, but first, making sure he gets better.
"Look, obviously you are very distressed or this is just causing you more distress than you've already been through. You might not even be crying just for this anymore. I do want to help, but I'm sure you understand some things are out of my hand. What I can do, is to promise you I won't do anything before letting you know about it. So after you calm down and feel like you can breathe properly and tell me you are feeling better with a proper smile on, I will call my boss to ask what's the procedure, if I have to tell your family or how do I record this incident because he usually deals with this stuff. Depending on what he says, I'll see how to proceed while also considering your feelings in the matter, OK?"
Yoh nodded trying to catch his breath and he was grateful Lizzy gave him a few minutes until he could form a sentence without fearing it will come out as a sob.
"I know it's not OK what I asked and I'm putting your job at risk."
"And my own morale conduit." Lizzy added as she gave him another tissue for his nose before she also encouraged him to drink some water.
"And your own values." Yoh continued after he put the bottle down. "But what if this time doing the correct thing is not the right thing to do?" He had one card left to play - a lesson a dear old friend of his had thought him a long time ago. "What if sometimes what means the lawful thing to do isn't the right thing your heart would choose? Isn't it better to choose with your heart?"
"You mean for me to make the decision and not the system that dictates me those rules? But what if my own decision is actually part of those rules?" Lizzy asked intrigued by the discussion.
"If you're saying who you've been saying to be, then you are lying to your heart and you will regret that later."
"You think so?"
"A good friend of mine taught me so and watching him struggle was enough of a lesson to understand how important is to choose with our heart and be true to ourselves rather than chose to do what's the correct thing to do at times…"
"…because not what is the correct thing to do is always the right thing to do." Lizzy finished his sentence and smiled. "What an interesting friend you have Yoh, I think it's a great lesson, but the real adult world unfortunately doesn't always work like this. Things are unfair at times."
"But you could make them fair."
"It's too risky. I can't just risk my job like this…"
"It is if someone finds out about Anna, but no one will, so you'll be fine, I promise. Look, I'm fine now, so maybe talk to your boss and think about it. You have my word I won't run if you give me your word you won't tell anyone about Anna yet."
"It's a promise." Lizzy nodded. "And I will think about it if it means this much to you."
"Thank you!" Yoh said before he smiled her way adding embarrassed. "And I'm really better now, thanks about before."
"No need to be shy, there's nothing wrong to cry especially after what you two have been through. I'll be back. Here." Lizzy as she threw him a pair of keys from a nearby drawer. "I have a spare key to the room and now you have one. My way to show I'm keeping my part of the promise. I'll be back, you better both still be here. And don't lose that key!"
"Sure!" Yoh replied and Lizzy smiled as she closed the door.
"Doctor Haru? Good evening, this is nurse Cathy. I apologize to call you on your holiday and this late, but you gave me your permission to call you if any of your special patients comes in no matter the time of the day or night."
"No need to apologize, Cathy and don't worry about the time, I'm in a different time zone, here's just afternoon and I'm enjoying a cocktail while my wife is swimming in the pool. What happened? Who came in? Wait, don't tell me, it's the young Asakura isn't it? Another street fight?" His voice was cheerful, obviously enjoying his time off, yet it was the total opposite of Lizzy's serious one.
"Yes, you are right!" She tried to sound less tense, yet the whole situation was getting to her. "What am I supposed to do, call his family, wait till tomorrow…"
"No, not at all. If he isn't seriously injured and he can still talk and walk and doesn't need surgery, no need to disturb his family. Maybe just call his fiancée unless she's already with him, the home phone is in his records. Oh and if you see her, stay away from her, family instructions, she gets even more special treatment even if she's not a patient." Haru gave a laugh, probably the alcohol was getting to him because he added very amused. "I swear at times I feel they care for that girl more than their own son, but I guess with the troublesome boy they have they're afraid he's gonna lose the girl and then what? Who's gonna marry him! They might as well take the girl away and make the situation easier for both, after all that girl's quite fearsome, they probably think she's going to knock some sense into him, but I'm telling you…"
"Sorry to interrupt Doctor Haru…" Lizzy cut in not the sightless amused by his opinion and actually feeling rather sick. "So, I shouldn't call his family unless his fatally injured or almost dying you mean? Wouldn't it be right for them to know if he got hurt, I mean he's so young and…"
"Cathy." His cheerful tone suddenly became professionally cold and she could hear the scolding undertone. "We discussed about this. Our patients' outside life is out of our hands, especially when it comes to those patients. The Asakuras have specified what they need to know, the rest is up to the boy."
"But he's only 14…"
"Cathy. We're not social services. Now how about you go and update his records with this new incident, make sure he's fine and let him go home. And don't worry, he'll make it back just fine, no need to walk him home or something even if it's past midnight. Actually, it's probably just around midnight there just now. Don't get involved, we have special instructions for this boy and you know it…unless you let your chatty self take the discussion too far and you found something that makes you want to do more….We discussed this. I won't wait to see your answer to this, I'll just assume you didn't because I know how great you are at your job especially when it comes to respecting and following the rules."
"Yes, doctor Haru." Lizzy found it hard to swallow.
"Now, I'll have to let you, I want to go for a swim myself." His tone was back to being cheery. "Bye Cathy!"
"Goodbye Doctor Haru, have a nice holiday!"
"Thank you! Good day!"
Lizzy hung up the phone from his desk she had used to call him before she went to her desk and sat on her chair. She needed to sit down.
'I shouldn't have asked so many questions. I shouldn't have, yet even without asking we would have still got here.' Lizzy sighed bringing her hands to her face.
She needed to think of something else, she didn't want to think about what she just learned and how right Yoh was. She opened her computer.
She looked for Anna's records first and to her surprise, she found none. She picked her phone and searched till she found an old discussion that had the girl's full name on it and typed it in. Neither Anna Kyoyama or Anna Asakura brought in any results. It was as if the girl had never been registered on a medical database before.
Lizzy closed the computer annoyed that she just ran into more information she didn't want to think about. She felt sick and reached for a tissue to damp her tearing eyes. She pushed the rolling chair to the door and she closed it before she blew her nose loudly. Then she let herself cry silently.
Yoh had been right. No one cared about him, especially his own family. And her gut told that they probably didn't even genuinely care about Anna either which only meant the boy's fears might be right.
'No one cares. Poor boy. Poor kids.' Lizzy thought and the next thing she knew she was sobbing for them.
