Title: A game of lost and found
Warnings : I am not sure where the story is gonna head, and I do not know which pairing I'm putting or if there's even a pairing… though I did receive suggestions… I'm just writing according to my flow and mood. And plz review, whether to insult me or whatever. Will love you if you do :) Domo!!
Summary: Set after the Hokuto Cup, where Hikaru still trying to go on. This time around though, he has Sai back with him. But life isn't that easy, not when another Go genius other than Akira had his sights set on him. Life is definitely not easy nor simple for him.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hikaru No Go, its characters, and what-so-ever I used in this fic that associates with HnG. It's solely for my own entertainment... and yours if you enjoy it. :)
Foreword: I got good news for those who had been complaining about my horrendous writing. I am proud to introduce all of you to a very special lady who had offered to beta my fic for me. Please put your hands together for… Ishkabod!! I know I complained about how troublesome it is to get it beta'd, but since Ishkabod so kindly offered, I was happy for it… though I'll probably take a longer time to upload my chapters now. Besides… she showed me how horrible my English is… sigh.
Anyway, here the brand new chapter!! All thanks to Ishkabod who edited my chapter for me. So enjoy!!
----------------------------------------
Chapter 10: What A Day…
Akira's day was bad.
No, wait, bad seemed too mild a word to describe Akira's day. It is more accurate if someone were to say…
Akira's day started bad and became worse as the day wore on. In fact it probably would have been better if he had just stayed in his room and barricaded the door.
It all started last-night, which thanks to his normal habit of becoming fully absorbed in whatever he was doing, Ko Yongha managed to gain entrance into his room and royally piss him off. Not only that, Yongha had unsettled and confused him so badly that he was left pacing his room most of the night, shooting his infamous death glares at everything in his room. It was a miracle that nothing withered or melted. Therefore, when morning came around, sleep was something that sounded and felt foreign. In addition, he knew Ko Yongha noticed it as well, since he could feel Yongha's amused eyes on him. And then Yongha had to go and officially inform everyone about his noble intentions of playing Go at the Institute today, all the while giving Akira a very shrewd look, knowing full well that Akira understood perfectly why the Korean was heading to the Institute today. Especially since the idiot had, the courtesy to inform him the night before that he knew Shindou would be at the Institute today. It was all he could do not to get up abruptly and walk, or rather stomp out of the dining hall… or yell at the Korean.
In the end, he had gone to school looking like something the cat dragged in. Grayish circles circled with bags under his eyes, a throbbing head, black clouds hanging over him and a bad temper that had him snapping at almost everyone who crossed his path.
Akira sighed heavily as he leaned his forehead on the table. Currently he was hiding out in the library, away from prying eyes and curious people. Normally he never paid any mind to the attention he usually received, but today was special. Why? Because the ever impeccable and perfect Touya Akira was the picture of pathetic ness today. It was so bad that all sort of rumours were circling throughout the entire school. Some said that he had love problems, family problems… even one about a Go problem he could not solve. Pretty normal rumours, thankfully. There was even one rumour about him and Shindou, though he was not too sure about the contents of that particular rumour. He kind of expected it, since he and Shindou were well-known rivals. However, the most recent… and probably the worst and most ridiculous rumour was that someone else had taken over Touya Akira's body.
How stupid and pathetic can the people around here get? What do they think this is? X-Files? Or maybe some variety shows entertainment or something? The people who started that particular rumour must have watched too many shows and read too many mangas.
Akira groaned softly, since it was pointless getting mad at those people and the amounting rumours that were still spreading around. It was going to last several days anyway. Despite the fact that Go was all he thought about, he knows how most systems work… rumours especially. Contrary to most - probably all - peoples thinking in this school, he was human and surely, humans are permitted to make mistakes once in a while. Akira gritted his teeth in frustration and anger as he remembered yet again the cause of all his troubles today.
Ko Yongha.
Just hearing the name got Akira all agitated again. Cheerfully informing everyone he wanted to go to the Institute today to find an opponent… hah! What an amazing actor that pathetic excuse for a human.
Not only did the Korean cause Akira's sleepless night, he managed to make Akira so agitated that he made so many stupid mistakes in his homework that even Akira was astounded. In addition, the mistakes and fumbles continued throughout the whole day, making all his teachers and classmates worried about him. Not only that, he could not pay attention in class, which had him ignoring his teachers. In addition, the frustrations and agitations stayed with him throughout the whole day and only his upbringing and strong will kept him in class and not walking out of the school… and most likely straight to the Go Institute. Akira sighed, at least now, since he was alone, no one would be worrying or bugging him about his so-called problem.
And what did Yongha mean when he said that Shindou's fighting spirit was Akira's? That particular spirit of Shindou's had always been there, especially for Go. Though it is true that Shindou played Go with him more than anybody else. Could the idiotic Korean have meant that? Moreover, what was it about lending Shindou to him? Shindou is not a thing, and clearly does not belong to Akira. Come to think of it… what the heck was he talking about, losing something precious to him?
Not only that… why was Ko Yongha so interested in Shindou? Shindou was truly some an enigma and prodigy, everyone recognized that, but what was it that held the Ko Yongha's interest that he would come back to Japan seeking Shindou out? There was something fishy about that Korean. Very, very suspicious. All that thinking quickly made his throbbing head worse and Akira launched into a silent cursing fit.
Stopping abruptly, Akira frowned. What happened to his manners… cursing someone like that. Though, if he would to think of it carefully, Ko Yongha deserved it. No, wait, he must pull himself together. After all, the idiot was just trying to bait him or something using Shindou. Nothing to worry about… except for the fact that Ko Yongha definitely knew which and what buttons to push. Damn that Korean.
Sitting up straight, he glared at the unfortunate chair opposite him, plotting revenge against the Korean (which he would never carry out, good manners kept him from doing just that) and worrying about Shindou. Shindou may be a brilliant Go player, but as a person… he was, and still is, extremely dense. Well, maybe not as dense as Shindou used to be, but still much denser than most people were and that alone had kept Akira worrying about him the whole day.
Not that Akira did not trust Shindou to know what he was doing, but when it comes to that particular, not to mention, egoistical Korean, Shindou's actions had always been unpredictable, even more so when it comes to a certain Korean. As proven during the Hokuto Cup tournament and the insane drive to improve faster that Shindou had right after the competition. But most of all, he trusted Ko Yongha as far as he could throw a mountain.
Akira closed his eyes tightly as his heart clenched painfully. Shindou Hikaru was his dear friend… his only true friend. The rest of the people that he could call friends were all his father's students, like Ogata-san and Ashiwara-san. Although Ashiwara-san was the closest to his age, he was still several years older than Akira.
Shindou… was not only his friend, he was his rival, his inspiration and encouragement, all rolled into one. And Shindou was also the one who taught him that it was alright to show his feelings at times and not hide them behind a mask like he usually does. Shindou… in a way taught him how to live, how to be a teenager.
'On the other hand I do believe that some of my mannerisms and attitudes have rubbed off on Shindou.' Akira frowned at the thought and then shrugged it off. Shindou does need to learn some restraint and courtesy, so it may be a good thing after all. At least he hoped that those were the only things Shindou had picked up from him.
Akira smiled at the thought of Shindou. That boy was truly one in a million. Shindou had such contrasting and shifting characters that one had to often wonder which was the real Shindou Hikaru. If anyone were to ask Akira, he would most likely smile and tell them to figure it out themselves. For the facades of Shindou were endless, and the number people who knew most of those facades were probably less than the fingers on one hand. In fact, Akira could only think of three people who fitted that category; Fujisaki Akari, him and, unexpectedly, Isumi Shinichiro. Even then Akira could safely say that neither of them knew the whole complete set of Shindou Hikaru. Even Shindou's mother had long since given up on figuring out her only child.
He wondered if he would be seeing Shindou later today at the salon. He hoped so, for not only he would like to know how Shindou played his match today, he wanted to know if the Korean did anything to him. Akira also wanted to know if the Korean mentioned anything about his intentions towards Shindou. In fact, Akira was burning with curiosity (and resentment) with anything that had to do with Ko Yongha and Shindou.
Akira sighed, no point wondering about it now, since that would only make his already mounting headache worse. Thankfully, his last period was a free one and the library was practically empty during his last period. Sneaking a glance at his watch, he groaned more loudly this time, earning himself some shushing from some nearby table. There still has half an hour to go before the final bell rang which meant he still had to hide for another half an hour or so from any remotely recognizable human beings in this school.
Akira gritted his teeth in frustration. If only he was not Touya Akira who abided by all the rules set in the world, or rather in this situation, the school, or he swore by heaven or hell that he would just get up and walk out of this building right this instant. Akira sighed again, this time in desperate agony and resignation.
'I hate myself.'
-------------------------------------------------
Hikaru placed a stone on the goban, following Sai's lead. He was letting Sai play against Saeki and, a small coolly amused smile played on his lips, Sai was winning.
Not that he expected any less, it was Sai after all. Nevertheless, to see Sai barely restraining himself from excitement and pure happiness was quite satisfying. Not to mention the slightly frustrated and bewildered look on Saeki's face was highly entertaining as well. Hikaru normally would only see that kind of look on Saeki's face whenever he was facing Ashiwara-san from Touya Koyo's group. To be able to produce that particular look from Saeki that was only reserved for Ashiwara-san was… to say the least, fascinating and gratifying.
Waya only shook his head, frowning as he watched the match between Saeki and Hikaru. "Ne, Shindou, your playing… isn't it more Shuusaku than normal?"
Hikaru only smiled mysteriously as Sai looked up in surprise at Waya's statement. "Saa… who knows?"
Not surprisingly, a large tick began to form on Waya's forehead. "What kind of answer is that?! Who knows??!! Well, I do!"
Saeki glance up from the goban momentary to glance at Waya before concluding that he was a lost case as he turned his full attention back to the goban. Elsewhere in the room, Isumi, Nase, Honda, Ochi Kosuke and Fukui Yuta, who had just joined them, looked up with dread and resignation. Hikaru only looked more amused at Waya's antics, for his earlier black mood had dissipated into nothingness.
Deciding to aggravate Waya more, Hikaru answered flippantly. "Shindou Hikaru's brand of unique answers, of course. Why? Have you not heard of them?"
The large tick on Waya's forehead, if it was possible, grew larger. "…Why... you…"
Isumi again decided to butt in before Waya started screaming at Hikaru, deciding that having Waya mad and sulking at him was much better than hearing another shouting match or, worse, neighbours screaming bloody murder at them. He'd rather try to pacify a childish Waya than a bunch of pissed-off and harassed neighbours, especially since he was always the one stuck with that particular job.
"Hey, hey Shindou. Guess what? Kadowaki-san said he is coming over later."
Isumi's smile faltered slightly as he saw Waya's murderous glare swivel to stare pointedly at him.
"Oh really? That'll be interesting." Smirked Hikaru, watching Waya and Isumi with unconcealed amusement. Isumi gave Hikaru a long suffering and inconsolable look which Hikaru only raised an eyebrow in answer to, as if telling Isumi to deal with the consequences himself.
One had to wonder just what was it that Hikaru found so interesting, the fact that Kadowaki, whom he had not met since they played a game together during Isumi's Beginner Dan Series (at least that was what Hikaru's and Kadowaki's vague replies implied, it was just too confusing to think about it anymore), or the fact that Waya looked more than ready to kill Isumi. Isumi was slowly but discretely backing away from Waya. Even Sai was more interested with the events happening in around him than the game he was having with Saeki.
A loud knock from the front door shattered the atmosphere in the room. Relief flooded Isumi's face as he quickly got up and rushed towards the door, telling everyone hurriedly that he will get the door. Waya looked more pissed at the loss of his second 'prey'.
'Saved by the knock.' Was the statement that floated through everyone's mind.
As if suddenly remembering the cause of his frustrations, Waya stared murderously at Hikaru again, which had Hikaru smiling oh, so innocently at him, dividing his attention between the game with Saeki and Waya. Placing another stone on the goban (prompted by Sai of course), Hikaru grinned widely at Waya. Seeing the wicked grin on Hikaru's face, dread was quickly circling around the room again.
"Is there something wrong, Waya?"
The tick came back full-force on Waya's forehead. He took a moment before he finally answered Hikaru. "I swear, one day, you're going to be the death of me, Shindou Hikaru… You idiot!! You know what is wrong! I mean you just pissed me off five minutes ago!! As a matter of fact, you're pissing me off right now!"
"Oh?" exclaimed Hikaru in a gleefully innocent voice. "I'm sorry, I did not realize I was making you mad. I just thought it was your natural response."
"Arghhh!!!" screamed Waya loudly. By now all of them, including Saeki and Sai, had backed away from the two of them, abandoning their respective games.
"Yo! You kids are at it again? Man, I guess kids will be kids." An amused sort of voice came floating in from the doorway.
"Kadowaki-san!" admonished Isumi, aghast at Kadowaki's bravado in down-talking a royally pissed-off Waya.
Kadowaki only smiled at Isumi placidly as he took his time removing his jacket.
"It's none of your business, old man. And stop calling us kids!" Waya told Kadowaki, annoyed at the new interruption.
"Like you so nicely put it, I'm the only adult here. So I need to keep you little kids in check." Discrete coughing could be heard from Saeki, staring pointedly at Kadowaki, Isumi and himself. "Ah, well Isumi-kun and Saeki-kun could be considered adults as well, I guess… but they are still younger than me, so they are kids as well. And kids like you should listen to adults like me."
"Oh yeah? Says who?" Waya retorted heatedly while Isumi and Saeki sweat-dropped at Kadowaki's statement about them.
"Kami-sama, obviously."
"Huh? Kami-sama?"
"Yup! According to Kami-sama, all those younger than me are to be considered kids, no exceptions."
At that ridiculous statement from Kadowaki, all of Waya anger flowed out, most probably through his hanging mouth. He could not imagine someone calling Saeki and, especially Isumi, kids. Young men, yes, but kids? And what was that statement about people younger than him?! Giggling could be heard coming from somewhere in the room as Isumi and Saeki shook their heads forlornly. Hikaru could be seen red faced trying to hold his laughter back.
"Yo, Shindou-kun. Long time no see. How have you been doing?"
Trust Kadowaki to ignore the commotion he had just caused in the room. Hikaru smiled wryly as Kadowaki started up a conversation with him and proceed to check out the unfinished game between Saeki and 'Hikaru'. As if an all clear signal was given, everyone started creeping back out from his or her hiding places. Their volatile friend seemed to have lost all his steam, and it did not seem that it would be anytime soon for Waya to start up again. In fact Fukui was poking Waya to get some sort of reaction. Especially since Kadowaki was there. Kadowaki had a… unique way of calming Waya down… if you could call it calming down.
"Ne, Hikaru, this person looks extremely familiar… who is he?"
'Oh? You can't remember him? That's odd. You usually remember the people you played Go with before.'
"Go? Oh!! Him! You let me play against him just before you took your pro examination, right? Is he a pro now too?"
'Yup! He became pro the same time as Isumi, a year after me. In fact he only lost to Isumi during the examination.'
"Hey Shindou! Hurry up. Stop day-dreaming, it's your move." Demanded Saeki while giving Hikaru's head a smack.
"Ouch… that's was totally uncalled for, Saeki!"
Hikaru scowled at Saeki as he silently urged Sai to make a move. Studying the goban quietly, Hikaru began to track back all the moves made by them until now. Suddenly Hikaru's eye widen as he saw Saeki's latest move. Hikaru's lips curved into a small smile.
"That was a good move by Saeki-kun. That trap is avoidable, but the follow up will be tough." Sai, who already noticed the move made by Saeki earlier, complimented him softly.
'Ah yes. A tobikomi, I did not expect Saeki to make a move like that. Your territory there will be separated, but if you are thinking as I am, you'll save a big chunk of your territory, rendering his attack useless. Man, Saeki must be really pissed to play like this. Your move, Sai, lets see if we are thinking alike. '
"All right… 13-4."
Hikaru and Sai did not talk as the game continued, each deducing the game themselves. A small frown crossed Hikaru's features as the game proceeded on. The game lasted for another ten minutes before Saeki was overpowered and resigned. While Saeki was looking dejected, mumbling something about being beaten by his kouhai again, Sai was sighing with happiness as he usually does after a game. Hikaru was still busy perusing the goban in front of him.
'Ne, Sai. I'm thinking… if you were to play there in answer to Saeki's earlier challenge, wouldn't the game end faster?'
"Huh?" Sai practically flew over to Hikaru, staring at the goban and where Hikaru was indicating. "There?"
"Oh! You're right Hikaru! Now that would be an interesting move… it's just so like you Hikaru, to notice such unconventional moves."
'A..ah? Is that so?' Hikaru, silently laughing and clearing up the board, thought about Sai's statement. 'I suppose you are right. Still, the result would remain the same, so I guess either way was fine.'
"Yup! I had lived over a thousand years after all, so if I say your moves are unconventional, it is unconventional. But you know what… you still can't beat me." Sai teased Hikaru in a sing-song voice.
Hikaru nearly spilled the stones he was holding in his hands as Sai said that. Eyebrows twitching, he thought to Sai. 'Just you wait, Sai. I get you back for that. Besides, don't you know us youngsters have to give old geezers like you some face and respect?'
Sai, upon hearing 'old geezers', had tears forming in his puppy-eyes. Soon he was glomping Hikaru from the back, which Hikaru gave no indication that he even bothered or noticed it. "Wahh…Hikaruuu, you meanie! I'm not old…"
'Said the thousand years old ghost.'
"Wah!! Hikaruu!!!"
Hikaru smirked, knowing full-well that he managed to get back at Sai for the comment earlier. He almost whistled as he gently swept the last of the stones into its container. Kadowaki, who had earlier walked off to let the two players concentrate on their game, came back to Hikaru's side.
"Shindou-kun, lets play a game. It has been along time since we last played each other."
Hikaru was startled when Kadowaki called out to him, asking for a game. "Kadowaki-san?"
Not only was Hikaru surprised, the rest of the occupants in the room was surprised as well. Surprised, shocked and intrigued. Most of them finally figured out (thanks to Kadowaki) that Hikaru and Kadowaki had played a game just before the pro examination about two years back and in the end Kadowaki lost, and lost badly to Hikaru, which led to Kadowaki postponing his entrance to the examination for a year so he could come back stronger. A year ago, they played their second game, which again Hikaru won, but left Kadowaki saying that the Hikaru in the second game was significantly weaker than the Hikaru in the first game. Of course, the most confusing fact was that Hikaru agreed whole-heartedly with Kadowaki.
Hikaru was still staring at Kadowaki with a mixture of surprise and confusion, before a small but detached smile crossed his features. "How long had it been since our last game, Kadowaki-san?"
"Hmm… it was a year or more ago. Since then you have been busy, winning pro games, getting into round-robins and the Hokuto Cup. By the way, that was a great game you played there…"
"Ah… Thank you, but I still lost." Hikaru answered wryly, bowing slightly to show appreciation of Kadowaki's words. Looking up in time to see Kadowaki's absentminded nod, a wry smile came upon Hikaru's lips. Hikaru more or less knew what was bothering Kadowaki. Realizing but not particularly caring that the whole room was listening to them; he called out to Kadowaki, remembering the conversation they had right after their second game.
"… Kadowaki-san, what do you really think of that game?"
"Huh?… Ah! Sorry! As I said, it was a great game. Anyway, would you like to play a game with me?"
Hikaru smiled softly, closing his eyes gracefully as he turned facing goban. "You're changing the subject, Kadowaki-san. But sure, let's have a game… and then," snapping his eyes open with a sharp gaze, "maybe you'll tell me what's on your mind, Kadowaki-san."
Most who were in the room, that seemed to be forgotten or invisible to both Kadowaki and Hikaru, either cringed or stared at Hikaru in apprehension. That look in his eyes was often only reserved for official Go matches. To see it now was like looking at a declaration of battle. Even Kadowaki was taken back by the intensity in Hikaru's eyes. Smiling challengingly, he took his place opposite of Hikaru at the goban as he picked up his stones, black, and motioned for Hikaru to nigiri.
"Is this another troublesome game, Shindou-kun?" Kadowaki asked as he swept the black stones, which he was to use, back into the container. Waiting for Hikaru's reply, he made no move to begin the game.
"……" Closing his eyes, Hikaru felt the comforting aura of Sai besides him. Smiling, he opened his eyes and faced Kadowaki. "Maybe, we'll know once we play and end the game. Please."
Kadowaki smiled as he watched Hikaru's actions, noting the lacked of the sadness and regrets that accompanied the last game they played. Picking up a stone, he held between his fingers. "All right then, let's begin. Please."
Pa-chi
Pa-chi
Pa-chi
By now all of the occupants of the room had crowded around Hikaru and Kadowaki, watching the game between them intently. It had always been a mystery to them about the two games between Kadowaki and Hikaru, for neither of them seemed to be inclined to talk or even show those two games. All of them were lost in their own thoughts as they watched the game, revelling in the intensity created by the two players. Even Sai was puzzled by the intensity in their game, but he did not dare to distract Hikaru from the game. For some reason, the game seemed important to Hikaru.
The game ended in two nerve-wrecking hours, with Hikaru as the winner as Kadowaki resigned. As Hikaru and Kadowaki discussed their game briefly, the rest of them were still speechless. They had known all the while that Hikaru was a strong player, a strong but eccentric player, but to witness a game like that… was beyond most of their imagination. It was almost like watching the Hokuto game between Hikaru and Ko-Yongha all over again. The brilliantness of the game… was incomprehensible.
Ochi's mind was working furiously, thinking about the game and the past events that focused on Kadowaki and Hikaru. He had finally admitted that Hikaru was strong, stronger than he could ever believe, but what was it that made countless strong players like Ogata 10-dan, Kuwabara Honinbou, Touya Akira, even Touya Koyo interested in him? Was it because of his ever-growing strength that seemed limitless? But if he remembered correctly, after Kadowaki's and Hikaru's second game, Kadowaki seemed displeased and disappointed for some reason, saying something about the Insei Shindou was better and stronger than the Shindou Pro.
Sneaking a sideway glance at Kadowaki, Ochi was surprised to see that Kadowaki was looking at the game and Shindou with some sort of reverence. Furthermore, for someone who had not only lost but was completely dominated, Kadowaki seemed satisfied and… with no other words to describe it, happy, but at the same time, he seemed puzzled about something. Now that was peculiar… Ochi immediately shook his head. 'Take my own advice. Worrying about Shindou will get me nowhere… except maybe more puzzles, roadblocks and one hell of a headache.'
"Ah! It's already this late! I need to go. Sorry everyone." Hikaru yelled out as he quickly picked up his bag and jacket, hurrying towards the door.
"What? So soon?" called out Nase in disappointment. "But it's been such a long time since I last saw you… couldn't you stay longer? Besides, you promised me a game… you agreed to play Shidougo with me."
"Sorry Nase-chan." Hikaru turned to Nase and winked at her, grinning all the while. "I have a date to keep. Bye!!" With that, Hikaru rushed out of the apartment, leaving a room-full of stunned people.
"… A date?" Echoed Nase, blinking owlishly at the closed door. Waya turned to Isumi and asked, "He has a girlfriend?" Isumi only shrugged his shoulders in reply, "I don't know everything about him, you know."
"Oh well…" Kadowaki got up from his seat and walked towards the door. "I should take my leave as well. See ya, kids."
Silence ensued in the room with the departure of both Hikaru and Kadowaki, especially right after the amazing game that those two played. Plus the fact that they were still left in the dark about the relationship between the two of them and the curious conversation between them.
"Wah!!!" the loud yell from Waya broke everyone out of their reverie, turning their heads as one to Waya. "Honda! We forgot to corner Hikaru!"
"Huh? Corner?" Honda quickly searched his memories, wondering what was Waya yelling about when he finally remembered. "Oh! You meant about making Hikaru tell us the reasons for him attending school again and his choices of electives."
"Of course! What else could I be talking about?" Shooting the closed door an irritated look, Waya fumed silently. "In fact, we shall make him tell us about his and Kadowaki-san's relationships as well."
Isumi and Saeki only shook their heads in defeat as they and the rest of the gang went about their own business, leaving poor Honda to cool a fuming Waya down.
-------------------------------------------
Akira looked up to the clock hung just above Ichikawa at the counter, noting that it was close to six o'clock in the evening. He sighed as he slowly cleared the goban.
'Shindou is not coming today, I suppose. I guess I should be heading home now. No point hanging around the salon.' Akira then grimaced, remembering one reason why he would rather hang around the salon.
A reason called Ko Yongha.
His feet felt heavy as he walked towards the counter, changing pleasantries with Ichikawa automatically as he retrieved his bag from her. Bidding her farewell, he walked out of the salon, heading home. He was not looking forward to tonight. Heaven knows what else Ko Yongha would be taunting him with today. And being unable to hear from Shindou exactly what went on between the two of them… Ko Yongha would have plenty to taunt Akira with.
'Today is definitely not my day…'
------------------------------------------
Hikaru slowly took his time walking down the stairways of Waya's apartment. True that he had a date to keep. Akari called him yesterday evening while he was on the way home, asking him to accompany her for the new movie that was showing. He had forgotten the title, seeing that he had no interest in it at all, but since Akari was practically pouting on the phone, he had agreed to go. Besides, Sai would enjoy the movie, since they rarely go to any movies, and hadn't gone to one since he came back.
He was supposed to meet Akari in an hour, which means he could take a leisurely walk to the agreed destination. As long as he was not late, everything was fine. Then again, he always seemed to end up late one way or another…
"Yo Shindou-kun."
At the familiar voice, Hikaru turned around, giving Kadowaki a greeting smile. "Kadowaki-san. Leaving as well?"
"Ah yes. I only came to keep an eye on you kids."
Hikaru laughed at Kadowaki's comment, knowing that Kadowaki only said it for fun since he wasn't too much older than the rest of them. Kadowaki smiled, walking beside Hikaru. After a moment of silence, Hikaru turned towards Kadowaki.
"… You have yet to answer my question, about my game with Ko Yongha."
"That again?"
"Hmm… was it bad? I made such a big fuss so I could be first string just to lose to him in the end…"
"No… it wasn't. I did mean it when I said it was a great game. It showed me your strength and inspired me to work harder… even though you lost to the Korean."
"… And?"
Kadowaki suddenly burst out laughing. "According to those kids back there, you're supposed to be quite dense, not so astute, you know." Hikaru only smiled in response, waiting for Kadowaki to stop laughing. "Ah… well, if you must know, I just thought that your previous strength as an Insei was noticeable there."
"Oh…" Hikaru had not expected such an answer from Kadowaki, choosing instead to store the information away to dissect later. After a moment of silence, Hikaru spoke up again. "So, what do you think of the game we just had?"
"… You do like asking hard questions." Kadowaki stated dryly, paying no heed to the question. Hikaru smiled again in reply, waiting for Kadowaki to answer. He was sure that Kadowaki would answer him sooner or later.
"… You played spectacularly, as usual. Although I still can't beat you, no matter how much stronger I am getting. That calmness in you… is really unshakeable, is it not? Again, you gained my respect and reverence." Kadowaki finally replied, staring up at the fast darkening sky.
Hikaru's face turned serious, as he thought about Kadowaki's words. "Kadowaki-san. Compared to the me you played today and the me during the first and second game, tell me what you really think."
Shocked, Kadowaki's eyes widen at Hikaru, as the soft voice but words spoken with conviction reached him. Sai, who was walking quietly beside them, halted as he heard Hikaru's words.
'First and second game? The first game… I was the one playing… second game… Hikaru played a game with this guy before?' Sai looked up, staring at the back of Hikaru, 'Hikaru… Hikaru is asking Kadowaki about the difference in our strength?' Staring at Kadowaki, Sai finally realized why was Hikaru asking Kadowaki instead of others. 'Kadowaki… was the only person who had played against the both of us, without even an inkling of Sai… or the thoughts of a connection between me and Hikaru.'
Shocked beyond belief, Sai could only stare at Hikaru. Both Hikaru and Kadowaki had stopped walking altogether, standing side by side as Kadowaki struggled with an answer. Finally, Kadowaki found his tongue and answered Hikaru.
"The Shindou I played today is very much stronger than the one I played on our second game…"
Staring determinedly at Kadowaki, Hikaru asked, "And the first time?"
"… The first Shindou… I… how do you say this? I supposed I could say that the Shindou I was playing earlier is strong, as strong as the first Shindou, but at the same time… not as strong. Somehow, it was a different strength."
"… huh?" Stupefied, Hikaru only gaped dumbly at Kadowaki. "Different? What do you mean?"
"Haha, I'm not so sure myself either. You are strong, no doubt about that… but… you have yet to gain back the level you had when you were an Insei… though I could say you are definitely closer to it now, a lot closer…" Kadowaki trailed off as they started walking again, lost in his own musing. Hikaru kept up with Kadowaki's pace, thinking about his words and wondering how true they were.
"… But it seemed like a different Shindou that was playing during the second game…" Kadowaki finally mumbled out absentmindedly, seemingly to have forgotten Hikaru's presence beside him. Hikaru's and Sai's eyes widen at the statement, disbelief in their faces. As if suddenly realizing Hikaru's presence, Kadowaki started sputtering apologies out.
"……" Hikaru smiled haltingly, not knowing what to make of Kadowaki words.
"I'm sorry. Saying something like that… sorry, it was rude of me." Still unable to forget his words, Kadowaki was still apologizing.
"I… you… Excuse me, but could you please explain what you meant by that." Hikaru was bowing towards Kadowaki, tensing as he waited for Kadowaki's reply. Kadowaki was looking at Hikaru with bewilderment.
"… I… the Shindou-kun I was playing today, the pattern, was similar to the Shindou-kun that was still an Insei. The second game between us, it was like that time your strength was still immature, or had become immature… I don't know. I mean… there were the similarities between all three games, but it just seemed like Shindou-kun was totally a different person during our second game."
"I… I see." Head downcast, Hikaru picked up the pace again, with Sai and Kadowaki following him. "…… difference?"
"Sorry, what?" Straining his ears, Kadowaki tried to catch Hikaru's subdued voice.
"Between the first game and the last. how much difference?" Kadowaki gazed silently at Hikaru, understanding that Hikaru was not asking about the differences in strength.
"… Not much, hardly noticeable in fact… just that I was able to notice it because I held those two games with you, and today's game as well, in esteem."
"Then… then what is different?"
"… It was more to the type of moves you used, I guess."
"… I see…"
At that Hikaru dropped all interest in talking, which suited Kadowaki as well since the two of them were lost in their own thoughts. Soon they reached a crossroad where Hikaru bade Kadowaki farewell, with Kadowaki smiling apologetically at him as he waved Hikaru off. Hikaru only shook his head slightly, smiling softly at Kadowaki as he headed in the opposite direction. Sai followed quietly behind him.
'Types of moves, eh?' Hikaru thought silently, thinking over Kadowaki's words. 'Ne, Sai… he must have meant those unconventional moves you said I like to used, huh?'
"………"
Noticing the lack of noise, Hikaru turned behind slightly to look at Sai. Sai's face showed that he was deep in thought, even though he was following Hikaru pace for pace. 'Sai?'
Sai finally looked at Hikaru. "Hikaru, you played with Kadowaki-san after I disappeared? Tell me about it?"
'Aa… all right. Remember when I let you play with him for the first time? Well, I thought then that I'd never see him again, remember? It seemed that he wanted to take the exam that very year, same time as me, but because I, or rather, you, totally crushed him he postponed his entrance for a year, determined to come back stronger.'
Hikaru mused over his own words, thinking back to the time when he first met Kadowaki. Looking back at Sai, he saw that Sai was also deep in thought… and was patiently waiting for him to continue. Watching Sai silently, he finally understood why Sai was asking that question. He too was puzzling over Kadowaki's words that the two of them were similar… and most probably wanted to know more about the reasons Hikaru had the second game with him. Sai, knowing him so well, probably guessed that the second game held a lot of significance.
'Sai, you want to know why I had the second game with Kadowaki-san, right?' Without waiting for an answer, Hikaru continued. 'As I said, I did not expect to meet him again, but he ended up passing the pro examination and he met up with me, coincidently at Isumi's beginner Dan series games. He… was asking me about my three failures during the examination, against Fukui, Oshima and Honda, and my beginner Dan series game against Touya Sensei, and my… consecutives streaks of forfeits. He… he was in awe of your strength, Sai. Thinking it was my strength, he was not satisfied with my record. He told me that it was because of that game he… he gained respect and reverence for me. He was unhappy with my losses, telling me that he had straightforward expectations for me and that my level was not like that. The thing was it wasn't me in that game; it was you. And I... I suppose I felt like I had wronged him, letting him think of me like that when it was you who played… when it was your strength. So… I asked him if he would like a game with me.'
Hikaru took a deep breath, smiling up at the sky bitterly. Sai could only gaze at Hikaru sorrowfully, knowing that this was another of Hikaru's regrets.
"Hikaru…" Sai called out, feeling helpless as Hikaru kept silent.
Exhaling the breath that he was holding, Hikaru turned to Sai and smiled widely. 'It's all right. Everything is fine now. Anyway, as I was saying, I asked him for a game which he agreed to, even though I knew he was going to compare the two of us. I guess, in a way, I wanted him to. Partly for him, seeing that my actions had caused him to doubt… and partly, for me. As you probably deduced, I dominated him… but when I questioned him further, he said that I was stronger as an Insei than I was as a pro. Obviously! It was you who played that game after all. Anyway, I told him that I agreed with him totally. I think that helped in creating my enigma's image…'
Sai smiled. He understood what Hikaru was trying to say. He had caused Hikaru a lot of problems, since he kept demanding to play even when their strength was so noticeably different. Obviously people will be puzzled over Hikaru's contrasting strength. But for Kadowaki to say those things… Hikaru's Go had grown.
Oh, he knew Hikaru's Go had grown, since he had played him many times now that he was back. In fact, most of the time he was struggling to win against Hikaru and most of those games go into yose to determine a winner. Sai suddenly realized that it was not the fact that he hadn't played for a while and was rusty, as he had once claimed when Hikaru was teasing him, it was simply that Hikaru that had gotten a lot stronger, and was still growing.
Sai suddenly stopped following Hikaru, eyes widening. As if suddenly finding the answer that had been eluding him all this while, Sai stayed rooted at his spot, his fan pressed against his lips in shock. Quickly running his mind through all the games he had played with Hikaru and the games that he watched Hikaru play, he quickly realized one important thing. The very thing that Kadowaki was talking about.
Hikaru's Go was almost like his Go. His… and Shuusaku's.
Quickly running after the fast disappearing Hikaru, Sai's mind was in a whirlwind, filled with questions.
Since when had Hikaru started to play like him? No, wait… Hikaru had sometimes used his moves, he had learned Go from Sai after all.
But that does not explain why was Hikaru's Go was turning out to be like his Go. It was natural to pick up moves from the one who taught you and played with you often…. But to end up playing exactly like said person… that usually never happened. Kadowaki was saying that the first game, which was against Sai and the game today, against Hikaru, was almost alike. The same strength, level… and style. And Waya… Waya only expressed surprise that 'Hikaru' was playing more Shuusaku than normal. Which meant that even Waya could not distinguish the fact that it was another person's Go. Then that must mean…!
"Sai" Hikaru called out softly, surprising Sai by talking out loud to him in public. "What Kadowaki-san was saying… does he mean that I… I played like you?"
Surprised that Hikaru was thinking along the same lines as him, Sai stopped in his tracks, staring at Hikaru in wonderment. Hikaru, realizing the missing figure of Sai, turned around and faced him. "Sai?"
"I think… that is exactly what he meant, Hikaru. And I… think so too."
"Oh…" Hikaru then smiled widely, but Sai, knowing Hikaru so well could see that there was a tinge of confusion and sadness in that smile.
"You were reaching for me all these while, weren't you? And when I was gone… tell me Hikaru, what really happened after I was gone." Sorrow was etched deep in Sai's eyes, causing Hikaru to look away from Sai, unable to face such a gaze.
"When you were gone, all I could think about was you. I stopped playing, not even daring to touch the goban or stones, stopped getting news from the Go world… I even broke all my contacts that had to do with Go. I supposed you could even say I practically stopped living. All just so I could have you back. I had thought that this way, you would come back… that it was my fault that you left… but you remained gone… Isumi broke me out of my grief by forcing me to play, but one move, one particular move was what truly put me back on the path of Go. That move… was one of those moves you loved so much. It was like, if I continued to play Go, your Go, I could see you… I could feel you. Somehow, even as it was painful playing the game that binds us together, it eased my heartbreak."
Hikaru's heart felt so much lighter as he finally said out what he had kept hidden from Sai all this while. True, he had not wanted Sai to know, but at the same time, it was not fair to hide such things from Sai. Besides, Sai was bounded to know sooner or later. Sneaking a look at Sai, he saw the expected sad look on Sai's face. Looking away, he stared up towards the sky, hoping to find a star somewhere and quietly waited for Sai to finally say something, knowing that he had more explanations to do.
"But for you to fully immerse yourself like this…?"
"I… I had no other way to be closer to you, than this. I had not expected…" Unexpectedly, Hikaru chuckled bitterly, turning around and continued walking, knowing that Sai would follow. "I suppose you could thank Ko Yongha for that. By insulting Shuusaku, he made my blood boil. I wanted to defeat him using Shuusaku's moves. And since you and Shuusaku are one and the same… well, I guess you know what I am trying to say. I was happy, immersing myself in both your Go and Shuusaku's Go. It made me feel closer to you. And I suppose, unconsciously, my Go had become yours."
This time Hikaru smiled bitterly, as his eyes shined with irony. "Ironic, isn't it. I said I wanted to beat Ko Yongha using my own Go, but my Go is Shuusaku's and Sai's Go."
Stepping in line with Hikaru, Sai called out to Hikaru and gave him a comforting and understanding smile. "Your Go is truly unique, Hikaru, for it is not only Shuusaku's and my Go, it is also Shindou Hikaru's Go. Shuusaku's Go was the old Go, 100 years ago. Sai's Go was a modernized Shuusaku's Go. Hikaru's Go was learned from both Shuusaku and Sai, and growing with his own type of Go, a mixture of those three. It was more like you are improving on our Go, Hikaru."
"Do you really think so?"
"Yeah, I do."
"Thank you, Sai…"
"By the way, how did you manage to become so like Shuusaku? Me, I could understand, I was (in a way) your Sensei after all… but Shuusaku?"
"I studied the kifu back at the Institute. They have a lot of kifu there, from over hundreds of years. Shuusaku's kifu is one of the many kept there. And then Touya Sensei somehow found out about my fascination with Shuusaku… maybe he noticed something? Anyway, he gave me a book with the complete set of Shuusaku's kifu, or at least that's what the book said; only you would know the truth. It seemed that Touya Sensei got it on one of his Korea trips. Though… I'm still not sure why Touya Sensei got me that book…"
"… Really??!!" Hearing the delight in Sai's tone, Hikaru smiled happily in response.
"Yes. I'll show it to you when we get back."
"Wah!! Arigato Hikaru!!"
Those with the ability to see ghost would see an exceptionally happy ghost glomping and dancing around a boy with bleached bangs at intervals as the said boy seemed to yell at the ghost to quit it and hurry up before someone get mad at him.
-owari-
---------------------------------------------
Here are some Japanese translations:-
Kami-sama - God
Tobi komi – a move where the player makes a jump into the opponent's territory, attempting to either separate or crush the said territory
Kouhai - underclassman
Shidougo – a game of Go where one id teaching the other player at the same time using the moves instead of words
Yose – end of the game where the winner is decided by the counting of territory
Alright, that should cover those words I used that most might not understand. And again… I supposed I'm late at updating again, aren't I? Oh well… I always am late one way or another… so, erm… sorry? Hehe.
Yay!! Like I said earlier, my story is being beta. Though I shouldn't be so happy about it, since it proved that my English is horrible… but still I'm happy.Like I said, I'm weird.
Actually I was hoping to be able to write about Akira's and Yongha's head-on confrontation in this chapter… but somehow I got carried away writing about Hikaru. Somehow I wanted to show the similarities between Hikaru's and Sai's Go. You'll see what I meant later on. Anyway, this is a very much longer chapter than I am used to writing.
Before I forget again, I would like to thanks those who reviewed my earlier chapter(s). Again thanks to those who claimed how addictive my writing is, horrible or not. I just hoped that I am not going to bore any of you with my long-winded writing.
Hikaru seemed pretty grown up, huh? I was trying to go for something of that effect, but I think I might have overdone it. In my humble opinion, after the disappearance of Sai, Hikaru (undoubtedly) was overcome by grief, and as far as I know and seen, people like that are often either sad all the time or became detached. And when someone is detached, he will seemed pretty grown up, but he is actually holding a lot of grief and pain in himself, letting it out only when something affected him strongly. It is like the person only does things not for himself, but for the sake of other people or for the sake of continuing living. It's not like he doesn't want to live, but it's more like he can't find a reason for living but he knew he had to. I hope I'm making some sort of sense here…
Yaoi, shonen-ai… what-so-ever, I'm not sure. I'm just following my flow of the story. I do not know if I'm ever going to pair anyone up or not. But I hope you enjoy my story either way.
And again… no, English is not my first language. Even though in my country English is officially the second language, I could say English is either my third or fourth language. It is the same for more than 50 of the population here. D
Enough babbling. Thanks for reading my brand new chapter and please, please review. Arigato!!
Oh… and happy waiting for the next chapter. Hehe.
